Tales and Stories – Part 4

Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Augustus Coopinheim. Somehow–and I’m not sure how–I have found myself stranded in the Punchy Lands. Professor VJ Duke is currently trying to help me get out, but until he succeeds…I’m hopelessly stuck.

I keep a journal of my adventures in the Punchy Lands, and Professor VJ Duke posts a portion of it here every Wednesday.

So, until the professor finds a way…

If you would like to refresh yourself on the story…Part 1; Part 2; Part 3.



It wasn’t long before the man named Schwarz and I were walking towards the castle.

Schwarz was a really strange person.

“So, why does the king want to see me?” I asked.

Schwarz shrugged. “Don’t really know, you know?”

“That’s not helpful.”


“You’re not making any sense.”

Schwarz suddenly stopped and faced me. “Don’t do it!” he screamed in a high-pitched

Needless to say, I was quite shocked.

We continued on in silence.

After a while, I tried again.

“How did the king know I was here?”

“I saw you, and told him. Chickit.”

“What does ‘chickit’ mean?”


I resigned myself not to say another word.

Presently, we came upon the castle, and I was led before the king…”

Tune in next Wednesday for Part 5!

Unfortunately, Daddy Salami has called off sick this week. However, he should be back too full health next week. He has left a message for you at Salami’s Hut.



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Professorish Smiley:




Depends on the day, see.

Punchy Argot:

1. Dadblameit.
2. Humdinger
3. Chickit
4. Chicky-woot-woot
5. Malediction
6. Rapscallion
7. Gardoobled
8. Congratulilolations
9. Togoggin
10. Gargonic
11. Two and Five Gurgles
12. Rats and a Heifer
13. Two nods, a wink, and an astroid
14. A bit, bits, and little bits
15. Huff-Hum and a Roar
16. So many thanks, I can't begin to thank you
17. Ri-do-diculous


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