Throughout time, an alarming amount of fools have—somehow—managed to write a page in history for themselves that detail their follies. It has become my reluctant duty to present to you—dear reader—what follies were committed on this day throughout history and by what fools.
However, while the inspection of others’ follies can be beneficial (for those who learn from mistakes), it is somewhat depressing in nature. Therefore, some happy instances shall be covered as well—sometimes.
1922: A 300lb hog collapses on Charlie Osborne as he attempts to slaughter it. Surprisingly, Osborne is just fine—well, almost. He has one side effect: hiccups. Osborne would go on to hiccup every ten seconds for the next 68 years of his life. Now, talk about a record! It was surmised that the hiccups were caused by a pulled abdomen muscle or a popped blood vessel in the brain. Had I the opportunity to speak with Mr. Osborne, I would have informed him of the only way to rid himself of the hiccups. I would have told him: Hold your breath. BRANDED FOLLY
Now I would like to depart from the normal routine and share with you a famous birthday and death.
823: Charles the II of France is born. He will become known as the Bald King—which is an interest. You see, Charles was—possibly—not bald, but extremely hairy. There is some doubt on the matter. I know that I would rather be known as Charles the Bald if I were, in fact, hairy. The intrigue would be beautiful.
1645: Miyamoto Musashi dies. Musashi was a renowned Japanese swordsman. He killed his first man at thirteen. I know that I would not even attempt to fight him; it would end in my death—of that I’m sure.
I would also like to apologize for the absence of yesterday’s post (Blatherings). The professor was somewhat busy. However, it shall be made up to you. A ‘blatherings’ post will be posted Friday, along with a hut post. I would have been pleasantly surprised to find that the ‘blatherings’ category had been neglected–that is, if I were following this blog. Nonetheless, the professor is a headstrong creature who is not observant; therefore, a ‘blatherings’ post will appear–Friday.