The Brand of Folly…Hiccups Forever

Throughout time, an alarming amount of fools have—somehow—managed to write a page in history for themselves that detail their follies. It has become my reluctant duty to present to you—dear reader—what follies were committed on this day throughout history and by what fools.

However, while the inspection of others’ follies can be beneficial (for those who learn from mistakes), it is somewhat depressing in nature. Therefore, some happy instances shall be covered as well—sometimes.

June 13th:

1922: A 300lb hog collapses on Charlie Osborne as he attempts to slaughter it. Surprisingly, Osborne is just fine—well, almost. He has one side effect: hiccups. Osborne would go on to hiccup every ten seconds for the next 68 years of his life. Now, talk about a record! It was surmised that the hiccups were caused by a pulled abdomen muscle or a popped blood vessel in the brain. Had I the opportunity to speak with Mr. Osborne, I would have informed him of the only way to rid himself of the hiccups. I would have told him: Hold your breath. BRANDED FOLLY

Now I would like to depart from the normal routine and share with you a famous birthday and death.

Birth:

823: Charles the II of France is born. He will become known as the Bald King—which is an interest. You see, Charles was—possibly—not bald, but extremely hairy. There is some doubt on the matter. I know that I would rather be known as Charles the Bald if I were, in fact, hairy. The intrigue would be beautiful.

Death:

1645: Miyamoto Musashi dies. Musashi was a renowned Japanese swordsman. He killed his first man at thirteen. I know that I would not even attempt to fight him; it would end in my death—of that I’m sure.

I would also like to apologize for the absence of yesterday’s post (Blatherings). The professor was somewhat busy. However, it shall be made up to you. A ‘blatherings’ post will be posted Friday, along with a hut post. I would have been pleasantly surprised to find that the ‘blatherings’ category had been neglected–that is, if I were following this blog. Nonetheless, the professor is a headstrong creature who is not observant; therefore, a ‘blatherings’ post will appear–Friday.

Advertisements

2 Responses to “The Brand of Folly…Hiccups Forever”


  1. 1 MikeW June 13, 2013 at 23:50

    Interesting you should bring Musashi up in your essay today. Just dusted off his “Book of Five Rings” yesterday and read a blurb or two from it. A coincidence perhaps.

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke June 14, 2013 at 14:27

      Wow. That’s really neat. Is the book any good? I have heard of it.


Say something...anything...O Punchy Family!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s




TPL Schedule

Sunday: OFF — Day of Shalt Nots

Monday: TPL Story

Tuesday: OFF — Because I'm Gone

Wednesday: Professor Speaks

Thursday: OFF — Because Yes

Friday: OFF — All Day Sleep Does

Saturday: OFF — Blue-Footed Boobies Need Fed

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email!

Join 1,873 other followers

Follow The Punchy Lands! on WordPress.com

Blog Stats

  • 115,330 hits

Join the Professor on Twitter!

Professorish Smiley:

==[:-{)=

or

==[:-{)+

Depends on the day, see.

Punchy Argot:

1. Dadblameit.
2. Humdinger
3. Chickit
4. Chicky-woot-woot
5. Malediction
6. Rapscallion
7. Gardoobled
8. Congratulilolations
9. Togoggin
10. Gargonic
11. Two and Five Gurgles
12. Rats and a Heifer
13. Two nods, a wink, and an astroid
14. A bit, bits, and little bits
15. Huff-Hum and a Roar
16. So many thanks, I can't begin to thank you
17. Ri-do-diculous


%d bloggers like this: