Circumstances—The Hotel Is In Trouble

Circumstances is a study of how completely different Punchy Landers react when presented with the exact same situation. Interestingly enough, I usually identify with one of the PLers; meaning, I could see myself behaving just as they did in that specific circumstance! So, without more ado, let it commence…

SITUATION: An expensive hotel, with hundreds of guests, is about to be blown sky high; and you are quite aware of that fact. It’s decision time. Do you act…or run?

Punchy Lander #1: Ruber Salami. Ruber has long red hair and is somewhat hideous. He lives with his father, Daddy Salami. Ruber is said to be very, very strong—and mean.

Ruber Salami walked casually into the hotel and over to the concierges desk. He leaned close and said as causally as he could, “By the way, chap, this hotel is about to blow.”

The concierge (Matthew, for our purposes) shook his head. “What is it you said?”

Ruber sighed. “Do I have to repeat everything, eh? I said this here hotel is about to blow.”

“Blow?”

“Yeah.”

Matthew shook his head again, then broke out into an obnoxious laugh. “I’m busy. Buzz off!”

Ruber shrugged. “Fine. No skin off me back. Why should I care?”

Moments after Ruber had exited, the hotel was no more.

Punchy Lander #2: Mr. Magi. Check out this recent post for more info on Mr. Magi.

Mr. Magi walked—marched, rather—into the hotel, and right up to the front desk.

“Young man,” he said, waving his walking stick about, “your guests are in imminent danger!”

“How so?” Matthew asked.

“Explosives have been planted in this hotel. You must evacuate immediately.”

“Go on, Crazy,” Matthews said with a wave of his hand. “I’m busy.”

“Fine then,” Mr. Magi said resolutely.

Mr. Magi then proceeded to walk from room to room and warn the guests. About 10% believed him and evacuated. Moments later, the hotel was no more—along with Mr. Magi who was still busy warning people on the 2nd floor.

Punchy Lander #3: Schwarz Tauptinker. Schwarz makes his home in America of the Punchy Lands. He moves around quite frequently, so his residence is constantly changing. Schwarz is tall, muscular, and quite dull.

Schwarz upon hearing about the hotel, walked quickly away.

“Why, Schwarz?” I asked.

“Because,” Schwarz answered, “I’m not in the hotel, so why should I worry? I would do if there was a cause to do.” In other words, if Schwarz was in the hotel, he’d worry.

Moments later, the hotel is history.

Disheartening to say the least.

So, whom do you identify with?
(1) Ruber. You would try to help, but when it became difficult you’d give up.
(2) Mr. Magi. You would be so set on helping that you would end up dying from your own stupidity and badly thought out plan.
(3) Or Schwarz. You’d be indifferent just because it doesn’t concern you.

This professor identifies with #2.

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18 Responses to “Circumstances—The Hotel Is In Trouble”


  1. 1 safia July 6, 2013 at 12:02

    Another thought-provoking post – no, I didn’t find it funny, and I don’t think you intended it to be. Sad to say, I believe the majority of people are No.3, but will probably say they identify with No.2. I trust you though, Prof. – I can tell you’re a genuine soul. If No.2 had recruited a few more like minds/souls, they could have covered a floor or half a floor each and save everyone perhaps.

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke July 6, 2013 at 17:18

      If only there were more Mr. Magis in the hotel!

  2. 3 Jennwith2ns July 4, 2013 at 23:39

    I like to think I’d be 2, but I’m not so sure of that, really. Probably 1, actually.

    • 4 Professor VJ Duke July 5, 2013 at 14:52

      I definitely understand #1. But, I would probably punch Matthew out, and then call for some help or something.

      • 5 Jennwith2ns July 5, 2013 at 23:05

        Yeah, see, if I tried that, the punch would feel like a tickle, and Matthew would just laugh in my face.

      • 6 Professor VJ Duke July 6, 2013 at 17:17

        Matthew would be mean enough to laugh too…maybe mace would do the trick?

  3. 7 Brian July 4, 2013 at 20:51

    Upon hearing this news, the Joker quickly looks around to find the best viewpoint upon which to kick back in a lawn chair with an iced tea to watch the carnage. As for me, probably number 2.

    • 8 Professor VJ Duke July 5, 2013 at 14:51

      :lol: You wouldn’t try the Joker way? Might be interesting.

  4. 9 sknicholls July 4, 2013 at 16:59

    I would like to say number two, because I like to think that i am altruistic to that extent and I would not want anyone hurt. Honestly though, if I was not inside of the hotel, and just heard that it was about to blow, I don’t think that I would risk putting myself into a situation of imminent danger, especially if I had not time frame. Now If I knew that it was going to blow in like an hour…then yes 2)

    • 10 Professor VJ Duke July 5, 2013 at 14:51

      You mean you wouldn’t be like Schwarz or Ruber? :)

  5. 11 krugthethinker July 4, 2013 at 15:48

    I love these! Certainly #2. True to form, I am Mr. Magi! :)

    • 12 Professor VJ Duke July 5, 2013 at 14:49

      Thank you! Yes, Mr. Magi is the most levelheaded, I think.

  6. 13 ladycheetah7 July 4, 2013 at 15:41

    If the sun is shining #1. If it is a full moon #3. ;-)

    • 14 Professor VJ Duke July 5, 2013 at 14:49

      That’s hilarious! It would be neat to try out the Schwarz way!

  7. 15 FictionFan July 4, 2013 at 14:41

    I don’t want to identify with any of them! Couldn’t there be a fourth option where someone calls the emergency services, everyone gets out safely (except Matthew – he doesn’t deserve to escape), and our hero gets an award for saving everyone?

    Otherwise (sigh!) I suppose I’ll have to identify with Mr Magi. Goodbye, cruel world!

    • 16 Professor VJ Duke July 5, 2013 at 14:48

      Haha! No, you must play by the rules. The 4th person would be too intelligent to exist. What do you have against Matthew? I would’ve probably reacted the same–well, I would have evacuated. ;)

  8. 17 Jackie July 4, 2013 at 14:36

    I identify with #2.

    • 18 Professor VJ Duke July 5, 2013 at 14:47

      Me too. I usually do identify with Mr. Magi.


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