The professor’s computer is so slow that it is quite mind-boggling. I believe, in fact, that it would win a slow race—if such a thing exists. Surely, though, one should be invented just so I can have some pride in my machine.
I suppose I should buy a new one, but the thought of moving all the professorish files to a new computer is quite chilling.
So I put it off.
And eventually forget about the whole matter altogether.
Then, I become quite vexed by my slow computer again.
This weekend, dear PF, was the last straw. I powered down the machine, unplugged it, and tore off the side panel.
You see, the professor was intent on finding the problem. (There had to be a bug or something making the machine run so dadblame slow!)
After searching around for a bit, bits, and little bits, I found a horribly ugly contraption.
And that’s when I believed in computer-evolution. Up to this time, I didn’t. But this unsightly contraption must have developed over time. I’m almost sure that the developers and builders weren’t responsible for putting it in. Their good sense would have got the better of them.
They might have screamed had they seen it. The contraption is, I’m sure, an inspiration for nightmares.
So, I immediately ripped it out, confident—in the extreme—that I had found the bug and fixed the machine.
Here is the ugly contraption:
Yes, that was the organism feeding off my computer, sucking the machine’s lifeblood away.
Of course, the professor felt somewhat proud.
But I should have powered up the machine before I began congratulating myself.
As soon as the beast came on, the professor was met with a ghastly surprise:
It seems that the ugly contraption had so effected and humiliated the professor’s machine that it would never recuperate.
Now, I’m faced with a choice.
Put that horrid object back in and bear the slowness, or…
The professor has made up his mind: I shall get a new machine.