PL Reporter–4thE

PL Reporter

4th Edition
26 2014

~~~

Segment A
Punchy Proverbs

PP's
All proverbs are written by V. Shnodgrate unless noted otherwise.

1. “Something is better than nothing”—a great excuse for going only half way.

2. Truth is determined; it is not swayed by either the majority or the minority.

3. “Embrace change!” That is what we’re told. But I prefer to walk about and inspect it before I decide if it’s embraceable.

Punchy Family, the professor favors the 3rd, for I’m always walking about. How about you?

~~~

Segment B
Severe Weather Report
weather

At least 40 different types of poisonous snakes have been found on Fat Man Island, home of Fats Henry. And, although this isn’t a weather report, it’s still severe report.

~~~

Segment C
Featured Story: Snakes Galore!
                                             by J. Freedwoppen

“Whoever’s fooling with me is going to get it bad!” Henry roared.

Mr. Henry believes that the poisonous snakes on his island—

“Is some kind of sick joke! And I’ll get revenge. I will!”

Flaticon_47154

[Icon made by Freepik from www.flaticon.com]

As of now, the PLPSA (Punchy Lands Poisonous Snakes Affiliation) is ordering that Henry not hurt the snakes in any way.

“Yes, yes,” said one spokeswoman for the PLPSA. “The snakes aren’t the ones in the wrong! They just showed up. We can’t be cruel and kill them.”

Then Fats Henry made a rather good point:

“I need to kill them before they kill me!”

“Which is snake cruelty,” replied the spokeswoman.

Currently, the owner of the snakes is being searched for. Nothing will be done until he or she is found.

A bummer.

~~~

Segment D
MicP Studios—Behind the Scenes
by Nicholas Warren

Nick is clearly behind on his duties.

~~~

Segment E
A Conversation

FATS HENRY: I’m in a real mean mood!
DADDY SALAMI: I’m always in a mean mood. And you don’t even have a son to cause your mood. Cur brain.
FATS HENRY: Don’t call me names, you idiot!
DADDY SALAMI: I hope the snakes bite you and eat you!.

~~~

Questions for Nicholas Warren? Comment here!
Need more information on any PL topic? Comment below to J. Freedwoppen!
Copyright 2014

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254 Responses to “PL Reporter–4thE”


  1. 1 Hazy May 28, 2014 at 14:55

    I think I like 3… If change is inevitable, might as well embrace it, I suppose.

    Do you think the snakes would be interested in biting FH?

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 18:18

      Or you could fight it. Weatherly would!

      Probably not. *laughs* I bet they’d run!

      • 3 Hazy May 29, 2014 at 23:35

        Haha, Weatherly sure would!

        I think so too! FH could probably trample them before they have the chance to bite.

      • 4 Professor VJ Duke May 30, 2014 at 13:00

        Yes, crushed snakes. And it sound so gory.

      • 5 Hazy June 5, 2014 at 12:46

        Haha, it does sound gory. I’ve seen one, you know. Not exactly crushed, more like flattened snake on the road.

      • 6 Professor VJ Duke June 5, 2014 at 14:25

        Yucketh indeed! I bet it was horrid to look at.

      • 7 Hazy June 9, 2014 at 11:41

        *nods* But better it dead (sorry, snake!) than alive and ready to bite me, I guess.

      • 8 Professor VJ Duke June 9, 2014 at 13:36

        Very, very true!

  2. 9 themofman May 27, 2014 at 20:58

    I embrace change on the odd chance that I can cash in a winning lottery scratch ticket!

    • 10 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 11:55

      There you go! That sounds dreadfully spicy!

  3. 11 erinkenobi2893 May 27, 2014 at 14:17

    I especially like the third one too! :-D Though the first and second proverbs are also awesome.
    That spokesperson from the Poisonous Snakes Assoc. is nuts. (Poor Master Warren. I’ll bet it’s the spokesperson’s fault.)

    • 12 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 15:59

      That’s awesome. Shnod did good this week, then.

      I know, right? Should we dispose of her?

      (He’s a good chap. But you should yell at him for me.)

      • 13 erinkenobi2893 May 27, 2014 at 16:00

        He did. :-)
        I don’t know… you see, I’m not generally in the habit of disposing with people, even egregious characters. I normally just lock them in closets. ;-P
        (I might. ;-) )

      • 14 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 16:11

        *laughs* Which might be worse! Remember what you did to Anakin!

        (Just comment on his page if you decide to. I think I might. As a matter of fact, I should get all the Punchy Family to leave complaints on his page. He deserves it. And it’d be so funny!)

      • 15 erinkenobi2893 May 27, 2014 at 16:20

        Well, for Anakin. I’m pretty sure that the biggest torture for the spokesperson would be not having anyone to speak to!
        (I might. :-P)

      • 16 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 20:49

        Yeah…I know what you mean. He liked Padme. I think he stalked her.

      • 17 erinkenobi2893 May 27, 2014 at 21:02

        So do I. Now we have to convince Padme that Anakin is a stalker. Maybe if we get Obi-Wan with us…?

      • 18 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 11:55

        Yes, I’d hope that would work. But…Anakin can be so pig-headed.

      • 19 erinkenobi2893 May 28, 2014 at 13:19

        He can be. He can also be outrageous, obtuse, etc… Why, this morning he invaded my staff meeting with Obi-Wan, Rowan, Margery, Peter Pan, Wendy, my muse, and my friend Iris. Iris and I booted him out and handed him over to Siri, who is our resident torturer. She tickled him for hours afterward. >:-D

      • 20 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 18:17

        Haha. Isn’t Siri Obi Wan’s girlfriend?

      • 21 erinkenobi2893 May 28, 2014 at 18:21

        Sort of. :-P They’re actually more like best friends, depending on which author you read. I like to write them more as best friends, preferring the companionate side of the relationship to the romantic. But it’s pretty clear that they’re each taken. :-P It’s actually a trend to write a story where Obi-Wan is being stalked and is saved from an awkward situation by Siri walking up and growling, “Back off–he’s mine.” (She’s fun like that.) I’ve never done anything like that, but other people do it like crazy. ;-P

      • 22 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 18:37

        And Obi-Wan would beat her in a fight, I bet.

      • 23 erinkenobi2893 May 28, 2014 at 18:51

        You’d be surprised. She’s one of only a few people who might be able to challenge him with a chance of success. I would say they were on either the same level of skill, or very similar levels. Of course, their skills are diverse; Obi-Wan specializes in strategy and defense, while she’s more aggressive and probably more agile and acrobatic.

      • 24 Professor VJ Duke May 29, 2014 at 12:39

        Is she stronger?

      • 25 erinkenobi2893 May 29, 2014 at 13:52

        Physically? Probably not. Spiritually? I’d say she’s probably about on even ground with him. Though she is more grounded and Obi-Wan is more mental. He has a more subtle approach than she does. So, they’re about equals, but with different strengths. You want a complex mind trick? Go to Obi-Wan. A solid duelist and negotiator with a very direct style? That would be Siri.

      • 26 Professor VJ Duke May 29, 2014 at 17:43

        What would she think of the professorish Sith?

      • 27 erinkenobi2893 May 29, 2014 at 18:50

        I think she would think he was really cool! :-D

      • 28 Professor VJ Duke May 30, 2014 at 12:58

        Wowawee! See. I’m surprised. I thought she’d attack. I think I need to read more stories of her.

      • 29 erinkenobi2893 May 30, 2014 at 14:22

        One thing that can never be said of Siri Tachi is “narrow-minded.”

      • 30 Professor VJ Duke May 30, 2014 at 23:49

        For sure.

      • 31 erinkenobi2893 May 31, 2014 at 02:09

        I need to post some more stories featuring Siri. It’s really disappointing how few I’ve written. I mean, it’s Iris’ OTP, but mine happens to be Buttercup and Westley, and I don’t really write “Princess Bride” fanfiction… Maybe I should write a whole story just starring Siri with only short appearances by Obi-Wan. That would be an exercise and who knows? It might turn out pretty good! :-D

      • 32 Professor VJ Duke June 2, 2014 at 12:00

        That would be awesome!

      • 33 erinkenobi2893 June 2, 2014 at 15:14

        It would ^_^

  4. 34 Angeline M May 27, 2014 at 01:08

    Proverb #3, definitely is my favorite. The husband and I may be headed into some changes in the near future (it’s a good thing) and this is a good quote for us. I hope I may quote you on my facebook page.
    Now about those snakes….the one thing in the world that terrifies me. Yuck!
    Daddy Salami is in a bad mood today for sure; maybe he needs some chocolate.

    • 35 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 12:51

      You definitely may, Angeline! I’d be honored. The professor could be heading that way as well. I’m sorta excited for you the sudden!

      Really? Ha! Even cobras?

      Yes, that’ll fetch him. Or a corn dog, you know.

  5. 36 Nicholas Warren--MPS staff member May 26, 2014 at 22:00

    It is a holiday…

    • 37 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 12:41

      Is that the dadblamed reason!!!!

      • 38 Nicholas Warren--MPS staff member May 27, 2014 at 23:10

        It is… kind of. More like an excuse.

      • 39 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 11:56

        At least you’re honest!

      • 40 Nicholas Warren--MPS staff member May 28, 2014 at 21:01

        I might be. But you don’t know for sure.

      • 41 Professor VJ Duke May 29, 2014 at 12:53

        That’s true… Huff-Hum, madam.

  6. 42 Amy Pinkrose May 26, 2014 at 21:45

    I am scrolling up and down, down and up, trying to figure out what in tarnation the background is. Bananas? Sand dunes? Then an aerial view of water. Hmmm….. This is quite complex, Professor. I like number 3 proverb the best ’cause I am furever sayin’ embrace truth, and sometimes that includes change. Good point, there. It’s best to test the change first a tad bit. You don’t want to jump into an empty swimming pool. OUCH! Daddy Salemi needs to learn how to LOVE. I mean, what IS that man’s problem if he cannot even love his own son. Criminey Crickets! Welcome back and all that to-do. You do like to make an entrance, now don’t you? Tsk-tsk. Attention seeker and all that. Constantly running around, yep you do. OK. I’ve said my peace. Bye. LadyP

    • 43 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 12:40

      LadyP! I wish it were bananas. I think it’s a dadblame desert.

      That’s true…about the pool I mean. Unless it’s filled with marshmallows.

      I think DS is incapable of loving. Sorta like the professor. Heartless!

      Do you suppose the professor is a ham?

      • 44 Amy Pinkrose May 27, 2014 at 12:46

        About the desert … yep surely I did figure that out before it gave me great cause for concern. Bananas or desert? And as for the Professor being heartless, not true, definitely NOT true ’cause he gave LadyP *hugs* on Petals which in turn made LadyP *fall off chair* in surprise. Now, being I am just a lowly little o’gal from o’er the Rainbow, LadyP knows the Professor is hammish for he is professorish as well as befuddled muddled. That’s LadyP’s report for this time. Good morning, Sir! says, LadyP.

      • 45 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 12:58

        Good morning! But I lost my heart in battle. What do you make of that?

      • 46 Amy Pinkrose May 27, 2014 at 13:01

        *mouth flies open* What battle? But I know you have a heart. Unless you are a phantom, that is. Or a shadow. You really are being silly, Professor!

      • 47 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 15:54

        It was cut out on a battle on top of a bridge by a castle! That’s why I’m wicked.

      • 48 Amy Pinkrose May 27, 2014 at 16:01

        And who has your heart now, Professor? Someone has to! And if you were wicked, I wouldn’t be talkin’ to you.

      • 49 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 16:12

        Maybe it’s under the sea?

      • 50 Amy Pinkrose May 27, 2014 at 16:24

        Which one? Just curious you see. Maybe I am a diver and can go get it.

      • 51 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 20:50

        Maybe a shark got it!

      • 52 Amy Pinkrose May 27, 2014 at 21:28

        *horror* *tears* OH NO!

      • 53 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 11:55

        And we both know it’s funny!

      • 54 Amy Pinkrose May 28, 2014 at 12:48

        NO!

      • 55 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 18:13

        A little bit?

      • 56 Amy Pinkrose May 28, 2014 at 19:12

        NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!#!#!#!#!#!#!

      • 57 Professor VJ Duke May 29, 2014 at 12:41

        LadyP is swearing at the end!

      • 58 Amy Pinkrose May 29, 2014 at 12:50

        *red faced* See what YOU push me to do? It’s all your fault!

      • 59 Professor VJ Duke May 29, 2014 at 12:58

        What’s wrong with a red face? It’s the pink ones that we’re scared of.

      • 60 Amy Pinkrose May 29, 2014 at 13:15

        *pink faced*

      • 61 Professor VJ Duke May 29, 2014 at 17:38

        And it’s beautiful on you.

      • 62 Amy Pinkrose May 29, 2014 at 17:40

        I cannot win with you. I was trying to SCARE you …. *giggling*

      • 63 Professor VJ Duke May 29, 2014 at 17:53

        I’m heartless, too.

      • 64 Amy Pinkrose May 29, 2014 at 17:57

        Jah, I suppose. If you vant to bee hartless, go be Jah?

      • 65 Professor VJ Duke May 30, 2014 at 12:46

        Are you speaking LadyPinkrose speak?

      • 66 Amy Pinkrose May 30, 2014 at 14:00

        *shaking head* Who wrote that? Must be my evil good twin again popping up. Hmmmm….

      • 67 Professor VJ Duke May 30, 2014 at 23:48

        LadyP has MPD.

      • 68 Amy Pinkrose May 31, 2014 at 00:55

        *winks*

  7. 69 PorterGirl May 26, 2014 at 19:59

    Aha! I love the proverbs. 2 is the most sensible but I like 3 the best. Astonishingly wise advice in my opinion.

    The snakes situation is pretty dire, they can be pretty tricky. I’m sure Fats has it all under control!

    It is very good to have you back, Professor ;)

    • 70 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 12:38

      Shnodgrate would probably bow. Do you suppose it’s professorish to bow? Thank, Lucy!

      Yes, I told him to “squish” them into submission.

      *smiles bigly* It’s nice to be back!

      • 71 PorterGirl May 27, 2014 at 13:00

        I think that bowing is fairly professorish. It all depends, of course, to whom you bow. People should bow to you, Professor!

      • 72 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 15:53

        Oh dear. I’d feel uncomfortable then. How about just a plain handshake?

      • 73 PorterGirl May 27, 2014 at 16:16

        Equally as excellent! In fact, more so :)

      • 74 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 20:47

        Right on!

  8. 75 The Dancing Rider May 26, 2014 at 19:44

    Love the background … so appropriate! And glad PL crew is back!

    I felt like the proverbs might have specially been written for me this week! I like all in equal measure — but got the biggest laugh out of #3.

    Um, that is one island I won’t be visiting. The “weather report” is enough to keep me away. Forever. Unless I could have my machete and shotgun at the ready! And, it appears even the PL’s cannot escape the rampant causes of political correctness. LOL! The “PLPSA” is hysterical! :)

    Well! Bad boy Nicholas!

    As for the conversation between Daddy Salami and F. Henry, I get such a kick out of DS’s comebacks. And, yes, unless DS is madly hacking away at something whilst singing, he usually is in a bad mood. Ruber or not. I do hope Fats will not be eaten or killed.

    • 76 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 12:38

      Thanks so much, DR! *half bows* It’s hard to do when one is wearing a top hat.

      Awesome! That was the professorish favorite, I think. I do think that’s what I thought, at least.

      *laughs* The PLPSA would drive anyone nuts! I think Mortimer is behind all those bureaucracies.

      Yes, I should do something wicked to him.

      Haha! You’re right about DS, for sure. I do think Fats will be able to survive. Perhaps Schwarz should be sent to the island.

      • 77 The Dancing Rider May 27, 2014 at 13:10

        Oh no, not Schwarz! Hmmm, on second thought, that coudl be very interesting. Just don’t send poor Mr. Ratherquite. One cannot challenge snakes to a duel!

      • 78 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 15:54

        Haha, and I bet he’d try. Do you like Schwarz?

      • 79 The Dancing Rider May 27, 2014 at 20:33

        I do like Schwarz. Along with many of the PL denizens. I’m not sure who is my favorite….

      • 80 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 20:56

        The professor, dadblameit!

      • 81 The Dancing Rider May 27, 2014 at 21:16

        Erm … of COURSE! That IS it! :D

      • 82 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 11:55

        *hangs head* That was so wicked.

      • 83 The Dancing Rider May 28, 2014 at 12:55

        Ha ha, not meant to be. Of course, I DO have a mentor for wicked! ;-)

      • 84 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 18:13

        Well, I was just as wicked. The professor? Yes! I’m a mentor for wicked.

  9. 85 Debbie May 26, 2014 at 17:33

    Welcome back, Professor — was the week off as long for you as it was for us??

    Shnodgrate outdid himself this time on the proverbs! All three ring true for me, though I’m inclined to like #3 the best. Inspecting a thing before embracing it sounds very wise and practical.

    I don’t like snakes. Period. I’ve already killed one in the back yard this season, and it didn’t want to die. ‘Twas a bloody mess, I’m telling you!

    • 86 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 19:41

      Yes! It drudged by. A wonder for sure! (Thanks for the nice writings, Debbie!)

      It does. I should learn from it, I think. But I probably won’t, you know.

      Neatio! How’d you kill it?

      • 87 Debbie May 26, 2014 at 20:15

        A garden hoe for a garter snake. Don’t tell me how GOOD those things are — if it hadn’t been in my dadblamed yard, I wouldn’t have had to chop its sorry head off!

      • 88 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 12:39

        *laughing lots* Goodness! I killed one accidentally mowing this year. It was a vicious move indeed. Does Dallas go after snakes? My last Shepherd did.

      • 89 Debbie May 27, 2014 at 14:39

        Strangely enough, no, Dallas doesn’t seem to mess with them — perhaps they have no scent??

      • 90 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 16:00

        Yeah, I bet so. Plus…they just never move much!

  10. 91 bardictale May 26, 2014 at 17:14

    I do so like the first, though the third is a close second.
    What type of snake? Perhaps they can be persuaded to settle in a certain area to prevent conflict with Henry?

    Welcome back^^

    • 92 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 19:40

      Ooo…who’s Henry? And what area should they settle in?

      Many thanks, Bard.

      • 93 bardictale May 27, 2014 at 04:52

        The east, I think. But it depends on their needs really.

      • 94 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 12:52

        The east of where?

      • 95 bardictale May 27, 2014 at 15:25

        Of the island. You did ask me where I think they should settle. East is usually a nice place to be.

      • 96 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 16:01

        Not South?

      • 97 bardictale May 27, 2014 at 17:17

        Well, I guess it depends on the type of island. The south of some islands are cold, and thus not favorable for cold blooded animals like snakes.

      • 98 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 20:54

        But what island, Bard?

      • 99 bardictale May 28, 2014 at 03:45

        The one we’re talking about, professor.

      • 100 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 12:04

        You’re always so cryptic, Bard!

      • 101 bardictale May 28, 2014 at 19:20

        I thought I was rather clear on this one…It seems I’ve been infected with the cryptobabboulos virus.

      • 102 Professor VJ Duke May 29, 2014 at 12:41

        *laughing lots* Why, Bard, that’s a very spectacular word.

      • 103 bardictale May 29, 2014 at 16:03

        *tips cap* very kind of you, professor.

      • 104 Professor VJ Duke May 29, 2014 at 17:50

        You wear a hat!

      • 105 bardictale May 30, 2014 at 04:45

        Sometimes, sir. Usually when I’m at The Shop.

      • 106 Professor VJ Duke May 30, 2014 at 13:04

        I see. Well…that’s good then.

      • 107 bardictale June 1, 2014 at 16:56

        It is, isn’t it?

      • 108 Professor VJ Duke June 2, 2014 at 12:06

        It is!

  11. 109 Catherine May 26, 2014 at 16:14

    Oh my. I like all three proverbs equally this week!

    Those poisonous snakes didn’t fall from the sky, did they? Because that would make them severe weather anyway, and explain how they appeared.

    Welcome back, Professor!! :)

    • 110 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 19:39

      Wowawee! That’s awesome.

      *laughing lots* Love that idea. But would you suppose anyone dropped them from the sky?

      Thank you!

      • 111 Catherine May 27, 2014 at 15:46

        Well, maybe a suspicious character was seen suspiciously flying a suspicious airplane. That might lead to dropping of poisonous snakes! (It’s a lot of suspiciousness, at least.)

      • 112 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 16:02

        *laughing* I love suspicions. We should take off in our Spitfire and find out!

      • 113 Catherine May 28, 2014 at 15:54

        Yes!

      • 114 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 18:33

        Awesome!

  12. 115 weggieboy May 26, 2014 at 15:14

    Nr. 2 or Nr. 3…. I think my deliberateness in making my choice suggests Nr. 3 must be my first choice!

    • 116 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 19:38

      See there! Now that’s a great thingy.

  13. 117 Julie Harris May 26, 2014 at 14:48

    Proverb #1 is painfully true…

    • 118 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 19:37

      Yes, that really hits home for the wicked professor!

  14. 119 Susan P May 26, 2014 at 14:21

    At long last. Dang that was a long week. ;) I am sorry to discover the Mr. Nick is derelict in his duties. Tsk, tsk.

    My favorite proverb is the third one. I’m not one to jump into a pool without examining it careful first. I bet Schwarz found them in his luggage when he got back from Florida, and just dumped them when he found them. And he found them on Mr. Henry’s property.

    • 120 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 19:35

      Yes, we’re up and running nowhere! I know. I’m deciding what should be done to him as of now.

      Did you Schwarz do it on purpose?

      • 121 Susan P May 27, 2014 at 10:32

        Probably not. I can’t picture him acting with malice aforethought.

      • 122 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 12:52

        Right on. He never does. Did you know MM and Lucini Pavarinni destroyed his mind way back when?

      • 123 Susan P May 27, 2014 at 14:16

        Laws. How did they do that, and why?

      • 124 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 15:58

        Through a series of injuries. Well, MM originally took Schwarz’s “stage name”. (I know most of this isn’t going to make sense. There’s such a history you see.) Schwarz didn’t like that, and in the ensuing fight, he got hurt. LP just was plumb mean.

      • 125 Susan P May 27, 2014 at 16:10

        I had no idea there was so much infighting in the PL. What was he like before that?

      • 126 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 16:13

        More normal, I guess. Though every PL character is odd. You see, most characters were created from real people, or other characters. They morph over time.

      • 127 Susan P May 27, 2014 at 16:18

        How can you put “normal” and PL in the same sentence?

      • 128 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 20:47

        It’s very normal to me!

      • 129 Susan P May 28, 2014 at 11:22

        Kind of “This is My Life?”

      • 130 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 12:05

        That’s it!

      • 131 Susan P May 28, 2014 at 16:14

        Dig deeper into anyone’s life and you will find pretty much the same thing.

      • 132 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 18:34

        *nodes* I think that’s right.

      • 133 Susan P May 28, 2014 at 18:51

        Nods. :)

  15. 134 L. Marie May 26, 2014 at 14:05

    Welcome back!!! I also like all three proverbs, but will give the edge to number 3. I like to stick my toe in the water to test it first.
    Love the new banner color.

    • 135 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 19:34

      Many thanks! Yes, I agree. One never knows if the water might be boiling!

      Thank you! I like the orange-ness–if that makes sense.

  16. 136 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister May 26, 2014 at 13:32

    Welcome back, professor! Yay!!

    1. Taking just something and then losing out on everything is also accepting the act of half way. I think. ☆
    2. Yes, exactly!
    3. I have this vision of you kicking tires now….

    Snakes have the ability to keep me home forever. I am so scared of them!!

    Poor Nick! (I laughed so hard!!) Clearly!!!

    • 137 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 13:48

      *big smiler smile* Thanks, Audith!

      A star! And a good point. What does the star mean, Audith?

      Now why would I kick tires?

      Even cobras? I’ve been told they’re friendly.

      Beat him, would you?

      • 138 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister May 26, 2014 at 15:43

        The star is indicating my favorite proverb…
        *smiles sweetly*

        To make sure they are as you need them to be, I think.

        Stop it!!! You’re making fun of me.

        *smirks bunches* Now that wouldn’t be very nice.

      • 139 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 19:39

        I love that, Audith!

        Haven’t you ever gone cobra hunting? The professor’s just being sweet.

        But he deserves it!

      • 140 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister May 26, 2014 at 23:24

        Too bad it wasn’t a green star.

        Not once have I ever gone cobra hunting! I’m sorry, but I’m not the type to, actually.

        You should be picking up the slack when Nick is too busy. That is the right thing to do, Duketh.

      • 141 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 12:50

        I live one one of those, you know.

        I know! *laughs* We’d have to go together. And use mustard gas.

        *hangs head* But no one wants to hear more from me!

      • 142 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister May 27, 2014 at 16:24

        I know and it’s nameless, as far as I know.

        *laughs* Yes, together. Always. What is mustard gas? Will it hurt Charlie?

        *lifts your chin so your eyes look in mine* I always want to hear from you. Your thoughts, for me, are never given enough. That goes without saying, Duke. And now everyone here knows, too. *runs home*

      • 143 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 20:51

        We’ll…name it…sand dune! How’s that?

        Yes. Mustard gas is horrible. Horrible. Horrible…

        *runs after you* My thoughts are dadblamery, though. But…I am touched!

      • 144 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister May 27, 2014 at 23:20

        Your green star is called sand dune? Well…okay.

        Then we aren’t taking that with us, for sure.

        *talks to you while she’s running* (Deep breath) No they aren’t! Your thoughts make people think and you make everyone feel special and welcome on your blog. (Cough) They all adore you. Keep talking and thinking, Duke. *speeds past you*

      • 145 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 11:58

        You name it then! You’re more creative.

        We could use it one the enemies. Just have to make sure the wind doesn’t blow the wrong way.

        *thinking about tackling* *runs after* Shouldn’t we stop now? (Thanks, Audith)

      • 146 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister May 28, 2014 at 15:16

        If I named your green star it would be called Planet Wonder, because I always wonder about how you got to be so creative. No, sand dune is fine. I like when you say things are so…

        I trust you. We could always to the finger test to check for wind.

        *slows down and laughs cause she hopes you would*

      • 147 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 18:21

        I’m always wondering about my dadblame mind. Hey, Audith, do you like movies as a rule? (Yes, this question isn’t just from out of nowhere.)

        How’s that done? I’m so dull…

        *laughs* Wicked! Now let’s talk.

      • 148 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister May 28, 2014 at 20:54

        Hey, Duketh, I like movies. (Okay?..but happy to answer your question.)

        You want me to explain it to you?

        *laughs with you* Ok. About the weather?

      • 149 Professor VJ Duke May 29, 2014 at 12:52

        Great! Well, the professor is thinking about doing something a bit different with the studio. Something with movies, for instance.

        I’d be honored! If it’s not too much trouble.

        Or about turtles.

      • 150 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister May 29, 2014 at 15:33

        You are? Sounds interesting, Duke. And you are wondering if I would stay interested in your blog? Or something else?

        Honored if I explained the finger test?! Okay…
        Well, if I place my finger in my mouth and get it wet using my tongue. I can pull it out slowly and and raise my hand in the air to see if a gentle wind creates a cool feeling, which tells me if it is windy or not. Haven’t you ever tried?

        Turtles are a good idea. Why are they so slow, Duketh?

      • 151 Professor VJ Duke May 29, 2014 at 17:48

        Oh no. I don’t see myself ever giving up the PL. You see, I’m destined to torture people with it for ages to come. That’s what Merlin has said. I’m always nervous when I’m about to start something new.

        I have not! That’s so neatio. Now I’ll have to give it a go.

        Because they’re disinterested with life.

      • 152 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister May 29, 2014 at 18:13

        I don’t think PL is torturing anyone, actually. Merlin is wise. I know, me too. I think it’s normal, don’t you?

        You’re just teasing me again!!!

        How do we change that? Do you suppose they are up for a persuasive speech on the subject?

      • 153 Professor VJ Duke May 30, 2014 at 12:49

        I think so. Absolutely, actually. It’s quite normal.

        I am not, dadblameit!

        Well…should we bash them against rocks?

      • 154 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister May 30, 2014 at 13:50

        Yes, you are, Duke!!! I can tell…

        Ouch! If you must…

      • 155 Professor VJ Duke May 30, 2014 at 23:47

        I don’t see how…

        Well, it wouldn’t hurt us.

      • 156 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister May 31, 2014 at 02:26

        You should get a manual for such help.

        *wonders how he gets her to try everything* let’s go get band aids first.

      • 157 Professor VJ Duke June 2, 2014 at 12:01

        Well, let’s not.

      • 158 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 2, 2014 at 14:17

        Okay. *throws bandaids everywhere*

      • 159 Professor VJ Duke June 2, 2014 at 15:57

        Such wickedness!

      • 160 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 2, 2014 at 17:43

        You knew that this would happen eventually, Duke

      • 161 Professor VJ Duke June 3, 2014 at 12:26

        I think it was a hissie fit!

      • 162 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 3, 2014 at 16:53

        *snorts* Mind your own business… LOL

      • 163 Professor VJ Duke June 3, 2014 at 18:42

        I’m not sure what to do…have a glass of milk.

      • 164 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 3, 2014 at 19:25

        Professor, just double checking, did you send a Heather Hill my way for help? I got a strange email today. She asked me if I was Ami..or something, anyway, she mentioned your name so I wanted to ask.

      • 165 Professor VJ Duke June 4, 2014 at 12:42

        No, I didn’t! Ooo, this is scary. Is everything okay?

      • 166 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 4, 2014 at 17:11

        Truly? Hmmm…yes, quite. IDK…

      • 167 Professor VJ Duke June 4, 2014 at 18:47

        It had my name in it? Now I’m wondering what I did unintentionally.

      • 168 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 4, 2014 at 20:14

        Yes, she said you wanted her to contact me about her poetry and art…then said a few other things.

      • 169 Professor VJ Duke June 5, 2014 at 14:10

        That’s horrid. Never said anything like that. I’d probably recommend for someone to read your blog for good poetry…but not that, I promise!

      • 170 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 5, 2014 at 15:53

        Thanks for letting me know, Duke. I believe you. I won’t reply back to her. It seems maybe I say too much sometimes. She’s obviously around…whoever she is.

      • 171 Professor VJ Duke June 5, 2014 at 19:42

        Do I know her?

      • 172 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 6, 2014 at 00:23

        Heather M. Hill is the name on the email. I don’t know if you know her or not.

      • 173 Professor VJ Duke June 6, 2014 at 13:48

        No, I don’t. Never seen her on the blog either, I think. What dadblamery, Audith!

      • 174 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 6, 2014 at 14:40

        Okay, well, now I really need the use of your katana and you stopped our lesson. It is dadblamery, Duketh!

      • 175 Professor VJ Duke June 8, 2014 at 15:00

        Oh…I forgot. Well, never let yourself get sidestepped.

      • 176 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 9, 2014 at 04:09

        It’s okay.

      • 177 Professor VJ Duke June 9, 2014 at 13:27

        What is?

      • 178 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 9, 2014 at 14:08

        You forgetting about our lesson.

      • 179 Professor VJ Duke June 9, 2014 at 20:44

        Oh yes…where was I?

      • 180 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 10, 2014 at 00:48

        At the bottom of the ocean, Shrub.

      • 181 Professor VJ Duke June 10, 2014 at 13:41

        *laughing lots* How wicked of you!

      • 182 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 10, 2014 at 14:49

        *curtseys* I come by that naturally.

      • 183 Professor VJ Duke June 10, 2014 at 18:42

        *growls*

      • 184 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 10, 2014 at 20:53

        Oops…

      • 185 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 3, 2014 at 19:25

        Oh and enjoy your milk.

      • 186 Professor VJ Duke June 4, 2014 at 12:42

        I don’t like milk!

      • 187 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 4, 2014 at 17:11

        You don’t??? At all…not even with some chocolate in it…Duketh…

      • 188 Professor VJ Duke June 4, 2014 at 18:46

        Chocolate milk isn’t too bad…

      • 189 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 4, 2014 at 20:13

        Probably overrated, I’d guess.

      • 190 Professor VJ Duke June 5, 2014 at 14:09

        Yes!

      • 191 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 5, 2014 at 15:51

        You agreed quickly.

      • 192 Professor VJ Duke June 5, 2014 at 19:41

        *smiles notoriously*

      • 193 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 6, 2014 at 00:22

        So, have you embraced change yet, Duke?

      • 194 Professor VJ Duke June 6, 2014 at 13:47

        Soon, I think. But, yes, in other ways. How about you?

      • 195 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 6, 2014 at 14:38

        *laughs* Sounds about right for me, too.

      • 196 Professor VJ Duke June 8, 2014 at 14:59

        That’s the wonder of it.

      • 197 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 9, 2014 at 04:08

        I wish I knew what we weren’t talking about.

      • 198 Professor VJ Duke June 9, 2014 at 13:27

        About beef?

      • 199 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 9, 2014 at 14:08

        Are you hungry already? Fajitas for lunch?

      • 200 Professor VJ Duke June 9, 2014 at 20:44

        I love fajitas!

      • 201 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 10, 2014 at 00:48

        Mmm, me too! I didn’t think you liked meat for some reason..

      • 202 Professor VJ Duke June 10, 2014 at 13:41

        Meat? Really? But why? It’s a necessary source of protein. Can’t do pull-ups without it.

      • 203 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 10, 2014 at 14:48

        I don’t know why I thought this…hmm. You sound like MM there…lol. Are you doing a lot of pull-ups?

      • 204 Professor VJ Duke June 10, 2014 at 18:42

        Not now. But I try to do 30 a day.

      • 205 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 10, 2014 at 20:52

        They are so hard to do. I’m impressed. I’d rather do push ups, I think.

      • 206 Professor VJ Duke June 11, 2014 at 12:56

        They are horribly hard. Yes, I like pushups better too!

      • 207 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 11, 2014 at 14:13

        Nice, well, now that we’ve decided that. Let’s see those pull ups!

      • 208 Professor VJ Duke June 11, 2014 at 21:15

        Chin ups are worse…

      • 209 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 12, 2014 at 03:19

        You do chun ups, as well? Do you let women hang on your arms while you eat a sandwich? I think I’d like trying that with you…

      • 210 Professor VJ Duke June 12, 2014 at 14:11

        Oh dear. Never thought of that. Not allowed, dadblameit!

      • 211 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 12, 2014 at 18:33

        Bummer!

      • 212 Professor VJ Duke June 12, 2014 at 22:48

        Spit-tooey!

      • 213 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 13, 2014 at 02:54

        You’re cranky.

      • 214 Professor VJ Duke June 13, 2014 at 16:59

        Always!

      • 215 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 14, 2014 at 02:47

        Yes, of course!

      • 216 Professor VJ Duke June 15, 2014 at 18:33

        That’s not true!

      • 217 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 16, 2014 at 03:22

        I know…you are amazing. Not cranky.

      • 218 Professor VJ Duke June 16, 2014 at 16:47

        Huff-Hum.

      • 219 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 17, 2014 at 03:12

        Roar.

      • 220 Professor VJ Duke June 17, 2014 at 12:55

        It’s only accompanied sometimes by a roar, you know.

      • 221 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 17, 2014 at 16:11

        This was my roar, you know.

      • 222 Professor VJ Duke June 17, 2014 at 17:48

        And it was a good one, I’d say.

      • 223 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 17, 2014 at 20:33

        Thank you!

      • 224 Professor VJ Duke June 18, 2014 at 12:41

        *bows*

  17. 225 InfiniteZip May 26, 2014 at 13:28

    Number three and kill the beastly snakes;)

    • 226 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 13:47

      Good choice, I think. I’m not sure, you know. I can’t remember which one I liked.

      You’d kill the snakes? Poor beasts. Why?

      • 227 InfiniteZip May 26, 2014 at 13:58

        Afraid….I’m afraid…..scary slithers …ick. Not embracing snakes:)

      • 228 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 19:34

        Not even the yellow one with blue eyes? Those might fetch the professor too.

  18. 229 FictionFan May 26, 2014 at 13:22

    Hmm…I like all three this week. Shnoddy should go on holiday more often… But if I must choose…hmm…3. No…2.

    Those snakes sound like an awfully Salami-ish kind of thing – has he been questioned? I wonder if there’ll be an opening for a heroic snake-hunter??

    Naughty Nicholas! But maybe he’s doing something more important – like swimming across the Atlantic to bring me chocolate for example…

    Fats and DS really need to learn to relax – have they considered yoga?

    Good to see you back. *great big smile*

    • 230 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 13:47

      Oh, he writes steadily, you see. I just didn’t take any of his proverbs last week. Maybe I’m wicked.

      Ooo, there could be! I do wonder if it’s DS now, too. Who should be sent to hunt the snakes? Mr. R?

      Well, sink him as he comes, please.

      What’s yoga?

      Aw, thanks! *bigly smile*

      • 231 FictionFan May 26, 2014 at 18:11

        Well, I think we know you are…

        Who but the Great Worm Hunter himself? Is this not what you have undergone years of training for? Devoted your life to? Now is your opportunity to win the greatest badge of honour amongst your people – the Golden Worm Hat, worn only by those with a walk glorious enough to carry it off!! My hero!!! *swoons*

        HahaHA! I’m thinking you two need the United Nations to send a peace-keeping mission…

      • 232 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 19:43

        There’s some who doubt it. Which is wrong. I must keep driving it home, you see.

        *smiles proudly* Now I didn’t know a hat would be involved. I do wonder how it’s shaped? Then again, you could be laughing me to scorn…

        You should be weeping for him!

      • 233 FictionFan May 26, 2014 at 23:16

        Well, it’s your own fault – sometimes you hide it too well…

        It’s like the bearskin hats worn by the Grenadier Guards – only with a hand-embroidered golden serpent coiling round it and rising up the front. Since it’s for the Professorish head, I’ve volunteered to do the embroidering – I propose to give it red eyes since they’re the Professorish favourite.

        Why?? What have you done to him??? *fearful face*

      • 234 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 12:45

        Now, I must go on a vicious rampage. But I’m not sure how to do that.

        *smiles really bigly* I’d be honored! And red eyes? Sweet! Well…are you at work on it?

        Nothing yet!

      • 235 FictionFan May 27, 2014 at 18:17

        I’ll get Tuppence to send you some tips!

        Yes, I’m stitching just as fast as I can! Have you started the Great Snake Hunt yet? You’ll need to provide proof of your prowess, you know…

        Well, what are you waiting for? *gnomish grin*

      • 236 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 20:55

        Haha, yes please!

        Are you laughing me to scorn?

        Well…you didn’t seem to like the idea. And one is always forced to listen to the ladies. *said in Mr. R voice*

      • 237 FictionFan May 28, 2014 at 00:36

        She says – first, look sweet and innocent…

        No!! I assure you, if ever snakes invade my little part of the world, I’ll be screaming for the Professor at max volume…!!

        Oh, I was just a little scared for him because I know how brutally vicious the Professor can be. (How horrified I am at the thought of my C-W-W confusing me with one of Mr R’s ladies… *sobs brokenly*)

      • 238 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 12:00

        I seem to have accomplished that. And we must work around it quick!

        I’d ship you a katana at the very least so you could chop their heads off. But since their heads are sorta their bodies, it can be difficult at times.

        *smiles bigly* That’s right! I’ve fought on the plains of Troy, in numerous castles. I can be vicious! (Oh no! I was just reminded of him for the instant. I know that FEF would never, ever take such treatment. Believe me!)

      • 239 FictionFan May 28, 2014 at 15:42

        Haha! Good point! OK, now stare hard at your victim and hiss while flexing your toes…

        Eeeuww, no! I couldn’t – I absolutely couldn’t! The Professor must come and do it for me or…or…I’ll have to hide up a tree!

        Indeed you can – and scary! Don’t forget scary! *secretly chuckles* (Phew! Well, please don’t impersonate Mr R again – it gave me quite a fright…)

      • 240 Professor VJ Duke May 28, 2014 at 18:32

        I don’t like this approach. Ask her for a more warrior centered one, please.

        Could you climb a tree?

        You’re laughing me to scorn! I’m surprised no one ever asked what the ladies names are.

      • 241 FictionFan May 28, 2014 at 20:30

        She’s deeply offended and says you’re on your own. I also saw her consulting a map of America, so…be careful!

        Indeed I could, Cheeky Chicky! So long as there were some nice lowish branches. Or possibly a ladder. And a couple of medics on standby…

        Hmm…let’s think how that conversation might go…

        PFM: So, Professor, what are Mr R’s ladies’ names?

        Prof: What do you think their names might be?

        PFM: Gee, I don’t know…Elsie, maybe? And Mabel?

        Prof: *laughing because he knows something the PFM doesn’t know*

        PFM: Aaaaaaaarghhhhhhhhhhhhh!

      • 242 Professor VJ Duke May 29, 2014 at 12:50

        If she comes, I think I’ll keep her, please.

        But I still don’t think it would be safe for you, you know…

        *laughs* That’s not right! Let me consult the book of truth…Aha! It’s Eleanor and Isabella. Are you proud of me?

      • 243 FictionFan May 29, 2014 at 18:47

        You can try…

        Any more cheek and I’m pretty sure it won’t be safe for you, you know!!

        I am! And also worried! Does this mean you’ll answer all questions openly and truthfully now? *starts work on little…lengthy…list* Interestingly, Eleanor is the heroine in Sense & Sensibility, and Isabella is one of the major characters in Northanger Abbey…have you been reading the Collected Works?

      • 244 Professor VJ Duke May 30, 2014 at 12:57

        I would! I think we’d get on swimmingly. That sounds so FEF-ish.

        The professor was just being gentlemanly! Dadblameit…

        Probably not, no. But you’re welcome to try. I tell you partly so that you’ll remember if I forget. Their names have changed over time, actually. It did dawn on my about Eleanor…but Isabella…I didn’t know. Oh well. Everyone can make mistakes. Mistake: The ladies parents chose horrid names.

      • 245 FictionFan May 30, 2014 at 16:51

        I’m not sure Tuppence likes swimming…

        By implying FF is aged and infirm?? Pah! Spit-tooey! Maledictions on your gentlemanliness, sir! Forsooth!

        Thanks! I’ll bear that in mind. Oh yes, that’s right, it must have been their parents who were huge Austen fans… *raises quizzical eyebrow*

      • 246 Professor VJ Duke May 30, 2014 at 23:54

        We’d find out once she got here!

        I was not! All ladies must be treated that way.

        Or Austen was a fan of the ladies…

      • 247 FictionFan May 31, 2014 at 15:47

        Are you proposing to throw my cat in a lake, sir? *frowns threateningly*

        You’ve been attending Mr R’s classes again, haven’t you?

        *laughing* Yes, that’s probably it! That’ll be why she also wrote a short story with Amelia in the title…

      • 248 Professor VJ Duke June 2, 2014 at 12:03

        I run all such tests on cats. It’s the test of faithfulness.

        I have not!

        Oh my. Goodness…

  19. 249 walt walker May 26, 2014 at 12:56

    #3 is very wise.

    And if it’s not embraceable, what then?

    • 250 Professor VJ Duke May 26, 2014 at 12:58

      Yes exactly. Well…what would you suppose to do, Walt? Do you think it’s kickable at that point?

      • 251 walt walker May 27, 2014 at 01:11

        Kickable is good, and better than what I was going to say, which was reject. Although now eject comes to mind.

      • 252 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 12:52

        And now that you’ve brought that up…have you ever ejected from a plane?

      • 253 walt walker May 27, 2014 at 13:43

        No but my wife has ejected me to the downstairs sofa on occasion.

      • 254 Professor VJ Duke May 27, 2014 at 15:55

        And I bet that makes you cranky!


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