Mr. Magi and Schwarz: Tea is Not Nice

“Do you like tea, Schwarz?” Mr. Magi asked as he poured two cups and sat one in front of Schwarz.

“Yes, okay, maybe not,” Schwarz Tauptinker answered.

Mr. Magi raised one eyebrow quizzically. “Answer the question with a straightforward answer, young man. Don’t get in the bad habit of saying all the possible answers at once. How can anyone tell anything at that point?”

Schwarz laughed. “What I meant to say is that tea is not nice, chickit.” Then Schwarz drained the whole cup.

“You’ll burn your throat out!” Mr. Magi cautioned, but it was too late.

“Nah. I can take it—tell you what.”

And Mr. Magi seemed surprised that Schwarz could indeed drink a whole cup of very hot tea all at once without any ill side-effects. (It might be a power that the professor is working on.)

“So, tell me why tea is not nice,” Mr. Magi said.

“It’s always so hot,” Schwarz explained. “It’s almost as if it’s trying to burn your throat, chickit. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.”

Mr. Magi squinted one eye and then the other eye. And then he did it all over again, starting with the left eye. “That’s quite odd, Schwarz. The tea is hot for that’s how we make tea. It must be hot.”

“You mean you make the tea hot on purpose?”

Mr. Magi nodded. “Yes.”

“What?!” Schwarz wasn’t happy. “You purposely try to burn my throat? What?! No, what?!”

Mr. Magi waved his hand. “Young man, you’re still not understanding. In order to make it tea, you must make it hot. That’s how it works. No one is trying to hurt no one.”

“I hate No One, then, since he’s trying to hurt No One.”

I believe Mr. Magi may have choked here. “What do you mean by that? I need to think about what you just said. Say it again, please?”

“No,” Schwarz said in a high-pitched voice.

And then Schwarz said it: “Tea conversations are weird, chickit!”

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273 Responses to “Mr. Magi and Schwarz: Tea is Not Nice”


  1. 1 bardictale June 30, 2014 at 19:26

    How about some ice tea? Or bubble tea? Those are nice and cool…

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke July 1, 2014 at 12:42

      What is bubble tea?

      • 3 bardictale July 1, 2014 at 16:01

        Ice tea with sweetened condensed milk and large pearl tapioca.

      • 4 Professor VJ Duke July 1, 2014 at 21:50

        That sounds really good! Never had one.

      • 5 bardictale July 2, 2014 at 16:35

        You should- it is rather nice:-)

      • 6 Professor VJ Duke July 2, 2014 at 21:54

        Will you make me one?

      • 7 bardictale July 3, 2014 at 18:28

        With pleasure#^^#

      • 8 Professor VJ Duke July 3, 2014 at 20:45

        Thanks, Bard!

  2. 9 erinkenobi2893 June 26, 2014 at 18:01

    Poor Schwarz. I don’t think he understands that it’s molecules colliding that allow the tea to steep. ;-P And I love tea.

    • 10 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 13:04

      Me too. I think you should explain it to him, and if he still doesn’t understand…a pie is necessary–right in the face!

      • 11 erinkenobi2893 June 27, 2014 at 16:51

        I’ll try, but I’m not sure physics is his area. ;-P
        A cream pie, for Schwarz. He doesn’t quite deserve a bug pie.

      • 12 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 21:07

        Yes, and maybe we should cut the cream pie with him and have a slice.

      • 13 erinkenobi2893 June 27, 2014 at 21:17

        How are we going to cut a pie with him? He’s not that sharp, you know. :-P

      • 14 Professor VJ Duke June 30, 2014 at 12:32

        *laughs* That’s true. Well, I’m stumped on the matter.

      • 15 erinkenobi2893 June 30, 2014 at 15:32

        We should let him have some pie with us, though.

      • 16 Professor VJ Duke June 30, 2014 at 18:17

        I think he needs someone to teach him things.

      • 17 erinkenobi2893 June 30, 2014 at 19:57

        Yes. We should teach him over pie. ;-)

      • 18 Professor VJ Duke July 1, 2014 at 12:43

        Which might actually work.

      • 19 erinkenobi2893 July 1, 2014 at 14:08

        Pi is a great teaching tool… NO! TYPO TURKEY! *punches it in the face* No, what I meant to say was, PIE is a great teaching tool. Pi is just… a number. :-P

      • 20 Professor VJ Duke July 1, 2014 at 21:18

        *laughing lots* I love the phrase “typo turkey”. I’ll have to use it on Rosalie.

      • 21 erinkenobi2893 July 1, 2014 at 22:20

        She won’t be surprised. Typo Turkeys have been the scourge of my mind palace since before I knew her. ;-P

      • 22 Professor VJ Duke July 2, 2014 at 13:32

        *laughing* Well, I always make them, I fear.

      • 23 erinkenobi2893 July 3, 2014 at 13:51

        Yeah, they’re an ongoing threat. :-P

      • 24 Professor VJ Duke July 3, 2014 at 20:43

        We need to declare war on them.

      • 25 erinkenobi2893 July 4, 2014 at 12:47

        Indeed.

  3. 26 Hazy June 25, 2014 at 14:13

    I like how Schwarz jumped to conclusions. *laughs* Oh, Schwarz. He must have a pretty thick esophagus or mucosa or something.

    What about iced tea? That’s cold! It’s pretty good too, if done right.

    I love green tea with mint. I recently bought vanilla black tea, which was yummers!

    • 27 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 15:47

      *laughing* Ooo…what’s mucosa?

      It is! It can be really good. Do you like it sweetened?

      Vanilla black tea…that sounds really good. Yummers is a fantastic word you know.

      • 28 Hazy June 26, 2014 at 13:49

        ah, technical term… They line cavities that are exposed to the external environment and internal organs (accdg to wiki). Pardon the hazy mind; it slips to nerdy sciency mode sometimes.

        I do! But only just about 50% sweetened or less. What about you?

        good indeed. It is fantastic, isn’t it? Thanks, I’m glad you think so too!

      • 29 Professor VJ Duke June 26, 2014 at 16:43

        That’s great that it does! That sort of thing interests me a lot. The Hazy mind is wonderful!

        Yes, I agree. Can’t be too sweet! (Just like the professor.)

        It is. I might have to start using it.

      • 30 Hazy June 28, 2014 at 03:46

        Aw, thanks professor! (curtsys)

        *nods* A tea that’s too sweet is no bueno!

        Oh, please feel free to do so! *smiles bigly*

      • 31 Professor VJ Duke June 30, 2014 at 12:35

        *bows*

        Aha! What a great way to say that!

        Many thanks!

  4. 32 Me, Myself and DIY June 25, 2014 at 11:40

    Hot tea that’s not hot – He’s reminding me of a petulant child who doesn’t care what the explanation is. He wants it now and his way or no way at all! ;)

    • 33 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:14

      Yes, I see where you say that! Well, I suppose we should let him have it his way, don’t you suppose? Of course, you could always spill the tea on him.

  5. 34 Julie Harris June 25, 2014 at 00:48

    Schwarz obviously doesn’t understand the complexity of tea drinking! It is quite a tricky thing to get the temp just right!

    • 35 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:13

      Yes! I haven’t figured it out yet either. How does one go about it?

  6. 36 technophile9 June 24, 2014 at 20:19

    I’m British and I don’t like tea! *runs away before I am shot*

    My allergy to dairy could have something to do with it. :P

    • 37 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:12

      *laughing* But…what does dairy have to do with tea?

      • 38 technophile9 June 25, 2014 at 18:11

        You often have tea with milk, otherwise it tastes weird. :) some people like it without milk though.

      • 39 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 23:41

        I do!

  7. 40 InfiniteZip June 24, 2014 at 17:39

    I did a tea party post for you professor:) with the sun too:)

    • 41 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:12

      *bows* So many thanks! I’ll be along to read it soon!

  8. 42 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 24, 2014 at 16:52

    Ooo, I want to know more about Mr. Magi’s squinty eyes. I love that My Magi doesn’t have the patience for Schwarz. Why does he insist on driving him cranky???

    Hot tea is nice. Ice tea is too…
    Drinking hot tea fast…wicked, probably.

    • 43 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:06

      Well, Mr. Magi did seem kinda patient, didn’t he? I mean, in a way he did, right? I don’t know. Mr. Magi uses his squinty eyes every so often. It can be a very funny look–though he doesn’t mean it that way.

      Would you drink it fast?

      • 44 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 26, 2014 at 06:42

        In a way he did, but I think I must have preferred his other way, as it left a lasting impression on me, it seems.

        Is it as if he’s almost winking? I think I could have him winking. He’d like me, you know. I can be very serious, but I am also notorious for being able to settle entirely too serious of a man. They can’t help but smile.

        No, I don’t think I would. Its hot, you know???

      • 45 Professor VJ Duke June 26, 2014 at 16:36

        Aha! An interest–a very big interest! Let me see… Oh, I’m sure you could get Mr. Magi to smile, but…it would probably be a smile of remorse or of duty. The duty always comes first. I’m not sure I ever see him laughing or making jokes.

        Hot nothing!

      • 46 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 26, 2014 at 21:38

        *smiles* I’m glad you think so! I don’t want a smile out of duty. Ever. Never. Not at all. Authenticity only. Mr. Magi does have an important job. But shouldn’t everyone smile at some point?

        Hot coffee or tea is something to consider, Duke. Ouch.

      • 47 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 13:08

        Well, yes and no. You see, when you’re as serious as Mr. Magi maybe it behooves you not to smile. At least, I’m having thinks that way. Don’t you suppose so?

        That’s true. Very dadblame true.

      • 48 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 27, 2014 at 13:43

        I understand why he is so stern, as he has a very important role. Yes, I agree. He mustn’t show any weakness. It is what I love about him. You can’t blame me for wanting to see him smile or laugh. It’s just how I am.

        Dadblameit, I know.

      • 49 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 21:00

        Oh yes I’ll blame you! (Won’t be fun if I don’t.) *laughs*

      • 50 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister June 28, 2014 at 12:40

        But….is that fair. *laughing* (yes, I know.)

      • 51 Professor VJ Duke June 30, 2014 at 12:37

        *laughs* Well…maybe!

      • 52 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister July 1, 2014 at 01:46

        Maybe’s good. *laughing*

      • 53 Professor VJ Duke July 1, 2014 at 12:51

        Huff-Hum!

      • 54 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister July 1, 2014 at 15:27

        What’s the matter, Duketh?

      • 55 Professor VJ Duke July 1, 2014 at 21:48

        A bird flew in my room.

      • 56 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister July 2, 2014 at 04:59

        Recently? What did you do?

      • 57 Professor VJ Duke July 2, 2014 at 13:42

        Well, it was some time ago. And it was actually a bat in a performance hall. *laughs* I let him fly about.

      • 58 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister July 2, 2014 at 14:35

        A bat! Yikes… I’m really not surprised that you did let him fly about. Did you think he was Dracula? *laughing*

      • 59 Professor VJ Duke July 2, 2014 at 21:49

        No. He was interesting. I mean…Dracula would run from the professor. Wouldn’t you let him fly about too?

      • 60 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister July 3, 2014 at 05:05

        Do you mean Dracula would be afraid of you? Wow! I had no idea… maybe I should consider doing the same. *giggle* Tell me more! Oh. Umm, yes, but I’d also have to put in my ear plugs, attach my blindfold and sit under a table. But yes, he’s welcome to fly about…

      • 61 Professor VJ Duke July 3, 2014 at 20:29

        Oh…nothing scary about bats. They’re like flying rats or something like that. Well…I cut off dracula’s ears once.

      • 62 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister July 4, 2014 at 04:10

        Which is disgusting, Duketh. What do you mean you cut off his ears! Tell me…

      • 63 Professor VJ Duke July 4, 2014 at 17:43

        Well, I basically mean I beat him up, and know he leaves me go, you see. Poor rats…

      • 64 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister July 4, 2014 at 19:35

        Wow. Poor rats is right.

      • 65 Professor VJ Duke July 6, 2014 at 18:11

        It’s amazing, I know. *smiles proudly*

      • 66 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister July 6, 2014 at 21:55

        It is!

      • 67 Professor VJ Duke July 7, 2014 at 12:46

        *laughs*

  9. 68 desertdweller29 June 24, 2014 at 16:36

    If Schwarz thinks tea conversations are weird, try tea etiquette! I can’t keep it straight and end up sipping like a brute.

    • 69 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:04

      *laughing* Like a brute… What is involved in tea etiquette? I don’t’ eve know!

      • 70 desertdweller29 June 25, 2014 at 13:52

        Neither do I… I will tell you what I do know — slurping is frowned upon, but it can be cancelled out with a good pinkie extension. The higher the pinkie when holding a tea cup, the more faux pas can be forgiven. I learned this from watching British movies, so it can’t be wrong. Oh, and throw in a “Good day, Governor” and you’ll be all set, especially if that person holds no official elected post.

      • 71 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 15:43

        *laughing* Okay…good day governor, pinkie height, and no slurping. I can remember that! Now, to go to a party in an Austen book. I’d want to upset the whole thing, though. Right?

      • 72 desertdweller29 June 25, 2014 at 16:09

        Absolutely! Now that sounds like a great time! We shall go together and upset the entire Austen austere. We’ll be brutally brutish. Schwarz should join us and toast with a chickit!

      • 73 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 23:26

        *laughing loads* That would be awesome! What character would you target? I’d go for Darby.

      • 74 desertdweller29 June 26, 2014 at 03:00

        I suppose I’d go for Elizabeth Bennet, considering my sarcastic nature. Off we go Mr. Darby, chickit! (I hope space travel is safe in the Punchy Lands. Also, I prefer first class as part of my character study…) Schwarz will have to assume the role of Mr. Bingley. I do hope he doesn’t mind…

      • 75 Professor VJ Duke June 26, 2014 at 16:31

        *laughing lots* First class, too? Dadblameit! I’m sure Schwarz would find it a wonder. Now…we must do everything in our power to destroy the party. We might even have to pinch and punch people.

      • 76 desertdweller29 June 26, 2014 at 20:41

        I’m in!

      • 77 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 13:05

        Great noodles!

      • 78 desertdweller29 June 27, 2014 at 13:42

        Ha! Another Professorism I’ll be using!

      • 79 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 20:59

        *laughs* It’s one of my favorites!

  10. 80 Simply Skeptical June 24, 2014 at 16:22

    Instead of Mr. Magi rubbing off on Schwarz it’s the other way around chickit! Dadblame frustrating tea conversation. What else is one to expect considering the place? Giggles….

    • 81 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:03

      Well, SS, I think you should have been there, to set things straight. For instance, what would you have done exactly?

  11. 82 E. June 24, 2014 at 14:46

    Two things:
    1. Schwarz reminds me of a pigeon, always repeating the same thing and bobbing his head like that.
    2. Because of this exchange, I am having tea with breakfast.

    • 83 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 11:59

      *laughing* Schwarz can make loon calls, you know. And I see where you say that.

      Great! What sort of tea?

      • 84 E. June 25, 2014 at 13:58

        It was peach and cherry flavored. I think today I’ll make orange tea. Gotta have variety, you know?

      • 85 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 15:44

        Wowawee! That sounds excellent…was it really good?

      • 86 E. June 25, 2014 at 16:01

        It was delicious! Unfortunately it was also the last of that kind of tea.

      • 87 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 23:25

        Rats. I was hoping you’d send me the whole box!

      • 88 E. June 26, 2014 at 00:22

        Haha! I’d be happy to ship you some sometime! :)

      • 89 Professor VJ Duke June 26, 2014 at 16:17

        *bows* Your kindness is too kind.

      • 90 E. June 26, 2014 at 16:18

        *curtsies* Merci, monsiour!

      • 91 Professor VJ Duke June 26, 2014 at 16:45

        Ah, it must mean wicked professor!

      • 92 E. June 26, 2014 at 16:46

        Haha! Non…. It means, “Thank you, Sir.” So… Close, I suppose.

      • 93 Professor VJ Duke June 26, 2014 at 16:50

        Well, I was far off. But that’s how the professor understands languages.

      • 94 E. June 26, 2014 at 16:50

        Haha! That’s not such a bad way. :)

      • 95 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 12:58

        Many thanks! You make me feel rather special. Haha.

  12. 96 Susan P June 24, 2014 at 14:06

    Time to introduce Mr. T to southern sweet tea with a mint leave on the glass. :D

    • 97 Professor VJ Duke June 24, 2014 at 14:09

      Yes! I think I could go for that. Do they put cherries in it?

      • 98 Susan P June 24, 2014 at 14:22

        I don’t know any who do, but you know, you can start a trend. Not much changes down here, but you can try.

      • 99 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 11:59

        We would have to do it together, and then force others to do it at the point of a katana.

      • 100 Susan P June 25, 2014 at 12:09

        That could be a bloody mess!

      • 101 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:17

        It would be! A scary one, too. I’d let you do it.

      • 102 Susan P June 25, 2014 at 12:20

        I think I’ll be a spectator.

      • 103 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:21

        That’s not fair!

      • 104 Susan P June 26, 2014 at 01:00

        *thumbs down*

      • 105 Professor VJ Duke June 26, 2014 at 16:22

        In the arena? For the professor?

      • 106 Susan P June 26, 2014 at 23:24

        that would be more like thumbs up

      • 107 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 13:21

        *bows* Many thanks, I think.

      • 108 Susan P June 27, 2014 at 13:39

        :)

  13. 109 walt walker June 24, 2014 at 13:11

    Hot tea is handy to have around whenever I need to melt ice cubes.

    • 110 Professor VJ Duke June 24, 2014 at 14:06

      Well, Walt, isn’t hot water better? What a waste of tea, you see.

      • 111 walt walker June 24, 2014 at 16:34

        But I don’t like tea. I am at war with it.

      • 112 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:04

        Aha! And why is this, Walt?

      • 113 walt walker June 25, 2014 at 18:49

        I don’t know. This is one of those wars that goes back several generations and no one remembers how it got started.

      • 114 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 23:43

        You should maybe make peace then.

      • 115 walt walker June 26, 2014 at 00:14

        With tea? Never.

      • 116 Professor VJ Duke June 26, 2014 at 16:17

        You must have had worm tea–once upon a time, then.

      • 117 walt walker June 27, 2014 at 01:40

        Certainly sounds like something that might start up a war once ingested.

      • 118 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 13:22

        A brutal war, Walt.

  14. 119 FictionFan June 24, 2014 at 13:08

    *laughing loads* Oh, my Schwarzy is just brilliant, isn’t he? And so profound! He makes us question the things we just take for granted. What a man!! (And I really, really can hear his voice in my head now – it’s…worrying!)

    But Mr Magi needs to be careful with that squinting – he’ll be winking repeatedly any time now, and we know how irresistible that can be to the ladies…

    • 120 Professor VJ Duke June 24, 2014 at 14:05

      (That’s great news! Now you know how I suffer…) Yes, I’m beginning to think that Schwarz has a type of brilliance, for sure. What kind, I’m not altogether sure, though. It’s all very odd.

      Oh, the ladies don’t like Mr. Magi, just like the professor.

      • 121 FictionFan June 24, 2014 at 17:21

        He has! He’s so insightful and original. And so brave! Even knowing he was going to burn his throat didn’t stop him – what a man! And of course he’s nearly as gorgeous as the Professor too!

        Hmm – enigmatic! Does this mean just like you like Mr Magi, or that the ladies just like you? (I’m guessing the latter…)

      • 122 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:10

        Hmm…hmm…hmm! Gorgeous…maybe handsome? I’m not sure what gorgeous means. I refuse to recognize it!

        Neither! It means the ladies don’t pay both of us much heed. *starts humming*

      • 123 FictionFan June 25, 2014 at 17:13

        Ah – your modesty is part of your gorgeousness, Prof! ‘Tis why the ladies find you so irresistible…well, that and your top hat… *whistles innocently*

      • 124 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 23:33

        *blushes* Umm…uhh…I feel like Lionel the sudden. *starts whistling too* I like my top hat.

      • 125 FictionFan June 26, 2014 at 01:57

        (So sweet when he blushes! Awww!) Lionel? Who’s Lionel? I like your top hat too. Does circular breathing make whistling easier?

      • 126 Professor VJ Duke June 26, 2014 at 16:27

        (Huff-Hum!) Lionel Howard, you know. Art’s helper. The ultimate stutterbutt, too.

        Well, you can’t actually circular breathe and whistle. You have to fill your cheeks with air (so they puff out) and then use your cheek muscles to push the air out. Makes a lovely sound, you know. While doing that, breathe in threw the nostrils. I can do it.

      • 127 FictionFan June 26, 2014 at 22:43

        Oh, I’m not sure we’ve met him, have we?

        That’s not possible!! At least, not for humans…

      • 128 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 13:15

        Oh yes you have. But you might not remember. He’s very unremarkable.

        It is! I’ve done it. While you’re breathing through your nose, you fill your lungs with air.

    • 129 Susan P June 24, 2014 at 14:06

      He’s a man who knows what he wants. Maybe. Sort of. Or not.

      • 130 Professor VJ Duke June 24, 2014 at 14:09

        Is the professor?

      • 131 Susan P June 24, 2014 at 14:22

        I think the professor knows what he wants.

      • 132 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 11:59

        I’m not sure he does.

      • 133 Susan P June 25, 2014 at 12:09

        He just isn’t in touch with himself. ;)

      • 134 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:16

        *nods* Like the professor?

      • 135 Susan P June 25, 2014 at 12:19

        Very much so.

      • 136 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:20

        Spit-tooey!

      • 137 Susan P June 26, 2014 at 00:49

        *hands him a cuspidor* I didn’t know you chewed.

      • 138 Professor VJ Duke June 26, 2014 at 16:22

        *laughs* If I chewed my tongue would fall out!

      • 139 Susan P June 26, 2014 at 23:23

        That might be fun to watch.

      • 140 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 13:20

        It would not!

      • 141 Susan P June 27, 2014 at 13:39

        You’ll never know if you don’t try.

      • 142 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 20:57

        Oh I’m quite sure, dadblameit!

      • 143 Susan P June 28, 2014 at 20:35

        Oh two heifers and a reindeer! How can you be so dadblamed certain?

      • 144 Professor VJ Duke June 30, 2014 at 12:43

        *laughing* Great one! Well, because it would hurt!

      • 145 Susan P July 1, 2014 at 16:23

        Snuff then.

      • 146 Professor VJ Duke July 1, 2014 at 21:53

        Snuff-Hum!

      • 147 Susan P July 2, 2014 at 01:05

        Harumph.

      • 148 Professor VJ Duke July 2, 2014 at 13:39

        *laughs* Do you know anything about strawberries, Susan? I have this patch outside. And I’m not sure what to do with it.

      • 149 Susan P July 2, 2014 at 16:57

        I had a strawberry patch donkey years ago. What in specific are you concerned about?

      • 150 Professor VJ Duke July 2, 2014 at 21:57

        Well…growing. When do they flower? They flowered earlier this year…and now not much is going on.

      • 151 Susan P July 3, 2014 at 01:10

        They flower and bear fruit in the spring usually (unless you are in Florida when they bear fruit in February). If this is the first year, you probably won’t have much fruit. They need to be planted deep like ten inches and they need fertilizer and mulch. What kind of strawberries are they?

      • 152 Professor VJ Duke July 3, 2014 at 20:24

        Oh dear! I have no idea, I fear. And they’re in a rock garden. You see, rocks were put in after them, and I was against it.

      • 153 Susan P July 4, 2014 at 20:22

        They wants sun in the Professor’s climate.

      • 154 Professor VJ Duke July 6, 2014 at 18:19

        Oh, that’s good! Directly in it, they are!

      • 155 Susan P July 11, 2014 at 18:18

        We had some great strawberries this year. And even better blueberries.

      • 156 Professor VJ Duke July 12, 2014 at 01:43

        I’ve got me a few blubbery things!

      • 157 Susan P July 12, 2014 at 14:57

        Make a smoothy?

      • 158 Professor VJ Duke July 14, 2014 at 12:44

        I never have!

      • 159 Susan P July 14, 2014 at 14:31

        It makes a quick breakfast.

      • 160 Professor VJ Duke July 14, 2014 at 19:42

        A good one, too, I imagine.

      • 161 Susan P July 14, 2014 at 19:50

        Well, now, that depends on the ingredients.

      • 162 Professor VJ Duke July 14, 2014 at 20:02

        Eggs, salsa, and blueberries.

      • 163 Susan P July 15, 2014 at 02:21

        That all sounds Great! When is breakfast?

      • 164 Professor VJ Duke July 15, 2014 at 12:47

        Well…you tell me!

      • 165 Susan P July 15, 2014 at 21:18

        It’s breakfast time somewhere.

      • 166 Professor VJ Duke July 16, 2014 at 00:45

        Yes…I think you’re right.

      • 167 Susan P July 16, 2014 at 12:17

        :D

      • 168 Professor VJ Duke July 12, 2014 at 01:43

        Blueberry I mean.

      • 169 Susan P July 12, 2014 at 14:58

        I knew what you meant. It was funnier the first time, though. laughing

      • 170 Professor VJ Duke July 14, 2014 at 12:45

        Yeah, you know, I think I make more mistakes than camels do.

      • 171 Susan P July 14, 2014 at 14:32

        Is that anything like the Three Stooges?

      • 172 Professor VJ Duke July 14, 2014 at 19:42

        I think it could be, huh?

      • 173 Susan P July 14, 2014 at 19:51

        Well, let me ask DS what he thinks.

      • 174 Professor VJ Duke July 14, 2014 at 20:03

        He’s…be careful.

      • 175 Susan P July 15, 2014 at 02:22

        Now that sounds challenging. For what should I take care?

      • 176 Professor VJ Duke July 15, 2014 at 12:47

        He can be more vicious than the professor!

      • 177 Susan P July 15, 2014 at 21:18

        Meh. I’m not scared of him.

      • 178 Professor VJ Duke July 16, 2014 at 00:45

        I am!

      • 179 Susan P July 16, 2014 at 12:17

        That is shocking. What happened to dastardly man?

      • 180 Professor VJ Duke July 16, 2014 at 13:11

        Right you are. I fear nothing suddenly.

      • 181 Susan P July 16, 2014 at 14:11

        MPD

      • 182 Professor VJ Duke July 16, 2014 at 17:29

        What’s this supposed to mean? *squinty Susan eye look*

      • 183 Susan P July 16, 2014 at 18:34

        Motor Pedestrian Done?

      • 184 Professor VJ Duke July 17, 2014 at 00:16

        Hmm…you’re messing with the professor, aren’t you?

      • 185 Susan P July 17, 2014 at 18:25

        How could you possibly think that?

      • 186 Professor VJ Duke July 17, 2014 at 22:40

        It’s just a notion…

      • 187 Susan P July 18, 2014 at 16:02

        Harumph. *throws a notion at the Professor*

      • 188 Professor VJ Duke July 18, 2014 at 16:46

        *throws it back at Susan*

      • 189 Susan P July 18, 2014 at 17:49

        *Susan lobs it over the net back to PVJ

      • 190 Professor VJ Duke July 19, 2014 at 01:02

        *hits it back with his racquet*

      • 191 Susan P July 19, 2014 at 18:24

        *Watches professor move to the back court.*

  15. 192 InfiniteZip June 24, 2014 at 13:04

    Tea warmed by the sun is best, just don’t stare at the sun or you’ll burn your peepers out:)

    • 193 Professor VJ Duke June 24, 2014 at 14:05

      *laughing* You will! But…does the sun really warm the tea?

      • 194 Susan P June 24, 2014 at 14:07

        You’ve never had sun tea?

      • 195 Professor VJ Duke June 24, 2014 at 14:09

        Never! What is it?

      • 196 Susan P June 24, 2014 at 14:24

        You put tea bags in a pitcher and pour water over them and let them sit in the sun until it is tea. http://www.simplyrecipes.com/recipes/sun_tea/

      • 197 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 11:59

        What a wonder. I suppose bugs are caught as well.

      • 198 Susan P June 25, 2014 at 12:08

        I rather imagine that a lid is engaged.

      • 199 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:16

        Then the sun can’t get in.

      • 200 Susan P June 25, 2014 at 12:19

        Silly professor…it’s the heat of the sun that does th’ work.

      • 201 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:20

        I am a bit silly…but I don’t believe it!

      • 202 Susan P June 26, 2014 at 00:49

        Why be a bit silly when you can be really silly like me.

      • 203 Professor VJ Duke June 26, 2014 at 16:21

        Really silly and put your tea in the sun. I bet Harry doesn’t believe in it. Or George.

      • 204 Susan P June 26, 2014 at 23:22

        Harry doesn’t drink tea. He’s a coffee man. And soda if he can get away with it. And juice.

      • 205 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 13:20

        Yes, I love juice.

      • 206 Susan P June 27, 2014 at 13:38

        Carrot juice?

      • 207 Professor VJ Duke June 27, 2014 at 20:57

        Umm…that’s deadly stuff.

      • 208 Susan P June 28, 2014 at 20:34

        How is it deadly? Do you hate carrots?

      • 209 Professor VJ Duke June 30, 2014 at 12:42

        No! I love raw carrots…but cooked or juiced…Yucketh!

      • 210 Susan P July 1, 2014 at 16:22

        Juiced are raw.

      • 211 Professor VJ Duke July 1, 2014 at 21:53

        Oh no they’re not!

      • 212 Susan P July 2, 2014 at 01:05

        Throw in some cranberries and some blueberries.

      • 213 Professor VJ Duke July 2, 2014 at 13:38

        Now that’s starting to sound good.

      • 214 Susan P July 2, 2014 at 16:55

        George has blueberries and cranberries in his cat food. He highly recommends it.

      • 215 Professor VJ Duke July 2, 2014 at 21:57

        Well…that might sound tasty, I think. How is Mr. George?

      • 216 Susan P July 3, 2014 at 01:04

        He seems to be doing well. He was trying to play soccer again tonight, but no one was engaging.

      • 217 Professor VJ Duke July 3, 2014 at 20:23

        He plays soccer?

      • 218 Susan P July 4, 2014 at 20:22

        That’s what he calls it. He busts some great moves, though.

      • 219 Professor VJ Duke July 6, 2014 at 18:19

        *laughs* Poor beast. What’s he use for a ball?

      • 220 Susan P July 11, 2014 at 18:16

        He has two kitty-sized play balls. When he was incarcerated in the bathroom, I put one in for him and one night I kept hearing this thumping noise…It was George playing soccer in the loo.

      • 221 Professor VJ Duke July 12, 2014 at 01:40

        *laughing lots* I love his attitude! Did you have to stop him?

      • 222 Susan P July 12, 2014 at 14:57

        No! I was so happy he was having fun. Once I knew what it was. He scarcely lets me out of his sight since I’ve been away three times since May. Poor baby.

      • 223 Professor VJ Duke July 14, 2014 at 12:44

        Aw! He’s just following you about to make sure you don’t run off again.

      • 224 Susan P July 14, 2014 at 14:31

        He worries about the community cats outside, too, and if I disappear who will take care of them? Also, my sister-in-law has two cats and he smelled them when I got home.

      • 225 Professor VJ Duke July 14, 2014 at 19:42

        Ooo, he was cranky, then.

      • 226 Susan P July 14, 2014 at 19:49

        He’s only cranky when he has to get into the crate. But he makes up for time when he’s in it.

      • 227 Professor VJ Duke July 14, 2014 at 20:02

        Does he growl?

      • 228 Susan P July 15, 2014 at 02:21

        It always starts with growling. But not scratching or biting me.

      • 229 Professor VJ Duke July 15, 2014 at 12:47

        He’s too sweet.

      • 230 Susan P July 15, 2014 at 21:17

        That he is. He is a gem.

      • 231 Professor VJ Duke July 16, 2014 at 00:45

        Give him a pat for me!

      • 232 Susan P July 16, 2014 at 12:16

        Done!

      • 233 Professor VJ Duke July 16, 2014 at 13:10

        I really need to pet him in person, too. Thank you!

      • 234 Susan P July 16, 2014 at 14:11

        Agreed. He’s curled up next to me right now.

      • 235 Professor VJ Duke July 16, 2014 at 17:29

        What a nice guy.

      • 236 Susan P July 16, 2014 at 18:33

        He is a nice guy. We have three more baby kittens now. I saw them last night. Tiny, they were, but sweet. In fact, their mother is also George’s mother and there were two of the orange and white sort.

      • 237 Professor VJ Duke July 17, 2014 at 00:16

        You caught them?

      • 238 Susan P July 17, 2014 at 18:25

        No, I just looked at them. Cute little ones.

      • 239 Professor VJ Duke July 17, 2014 at 22:40

        I would have caught them, I think.

      • 240 Susan P July 18, 2014 at 16:01

        Not with their fierce mother watching on them. It’s not as easy as people think to catch cats. They won’t let you touch them unless you make friends first. They run like greyhounds.

      • 241 Professor VJ Duke July 18, 2014 at 16:46

        I know! I make friends…and then…*grab viciously*

      • 242 Susan P July 18, 2014 at 17:39

        I wish you luck.

      • 243 Professor VJ Duke July 19, 2014 at 01:01

        Yeah, I’ll probably get a bit clawed.

      • 244 Susan P July 19, 2014 at 18:22

        From the greyhounds?

      • 245 Professor VJ Duke July 20, 2014 at 15:49

        No, the dadblame cats!

      • 246 Susan P July 20, 2014 at 21:11

        What did the cats do?

      • 247 Professor VJ Duke July 21, 2014 at 13:10

        They didn’t want me to capture them.

      • 248 Susan P July 21, 2014 at 13:42

        Ding bust it man. Leave the cats out of it.

      • 249 Professor VJ Duke July 21, 2014 at 17:03

        *laughs* Love that!

      • 250 Susan P July 21, 2014 at 18:37

        People always trying to steal my cats out of my yard.

      • 251 Professor VJ Duke July 22, 2014 at 13:26

        Yes, I might.

      • 252 Susan P July 22, 2014 at 13:36

        I don’t recommend it.

      • 253 Professor VJ Duke July 22, 2014 at 13:44

        I’ll come in armor.

      • 254 Susan P July 23, 2014 at 01:39

        Blackie the Great laughs at your armor.

      • 255 Professor VJ Duke July 23, 2014 at 13:28

        But is has spikes and is gnarled!

      • 256 Susan P July 23, 2014 at 17:28

        Blackie the Great continues to be unmoved and starts whistling When the Saints Go Marching In.

      • 257 Professor VJ Duke July 23, 2014 at 19:49

        *puts on his deep voice megaphone and screams or bellows*

      • 258 Susan P July 23, 2014 at 23:33

        *whistles* When the saints, go marching in

      • 259 Professor VJ Duke July 24, 2014 at 13:43

        Pete Fountain has a killer version!

      • 260 Susan P July 24, 2014 at 14:38

        I’ll keep that in mind if I want to kill someone. *wink*

      • 261 Professor VJ Duke July 24, 2014 at 18:03

        *laughs*

      • 262 InfiniteZip June 24, 2014 at 15:44

        Oh yes, nice and cozy like a blanket:)

      • 263 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:01

        What a wonder! I don’t believe it.

      • 264 walt walker June 24, 2014 at 18:03

        That’s why I always ckeck for tea bags before I go swimming on a hot sunny day. I don’t wish to become tea.

      • 265 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:12

        Not even blueberry tea? I had thought you might like that.

  16. 266 PorterGirl June 24, 2014 at 13:03

    Oh dear, poor Schwarz hasn’t got the hang of drinking tea, has he? But Mr Magi could have been more helpful by suggesting he wait for it to cool down a little, or blow on it first. But Schwarz is right about one thing – tea conversations can be weird!

    • 267 Professor VJ Duke June 24, 2014 at 14:04

      They can! Yes, I think Schwarz needs some instruction in that area. Mr. Magi is too scattered to realize it, though. Cold tea is good too, don’t you think?

      • 268 PorterGirl June 24, 2014 at 14:55

        Yes, certainly, I do like iced tea when the weather is warm – very refreshing!

      • 269 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 12:00

        Indeed! But you should just have cherry juice…

      • 270 PorterGirl June 25, 2014 at 13:07

        That sounds even nicer. I wonder if I can get cherry juice at my local shop…

      • 271 Professor VJ Duke June 25, 2014 at 15:40

        Oh, I hope so! If not, tell them the professor sends his complaints.

  17. 272 L. Marie June 24, 2014 at 13:00

    Ha! Mr. Magi’s first mistake was to invite Schwarz over for tea. So his confusion over Schwarz’s response is his own fault.

    • 273 Professor VJ Duke June 24, 2014 at 14:03

      Yes, I think so. But you know, wouldn’t Schwarz be semi fun to have about for tea?


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