Manly-Man’s Feats (#1) by Nicholas Warren

The contents of this story are only rumors, but Manly-Man has supplied some of the text himself. So it’s an accurate rumor at the very least. Depending on whether you believe MM or not…

***

The lightning struck the building.

And it struck the building.

And it struck the building.

You get the point.

It liked to strike the building.

Finally, the little lightning rod had disintegrated—this was no normal lightning storm.

Prince Beef was standing on one of the verandas of his palace, with many of his servants and advisors.

The White House, not overly far from his palace, wasn’t going to last much longer. But that hadn’t stopped Prince Beef and his company from watching the lightning with incredible interest, as it struck the building, and even venturing to cheer at a few of the strokes.

Prince Beef never had liked the man who lived in the White House, the general and sole commander of America’s army. (Which implies that Prince Beef doesn’t have much political power.)

Then the lightning struck again.

The roof went up in flames.

There was nothing but silence on Prince Beef’s veranda now. This was… I guess they thought it was very weird. By now, it was quite clear that the lightning was anything but natural.

I haven’t mentioned yet that it was night-time, and it was a clear sky, have I?

Obviously, someone with the power of controlling lightning had been made angry. By America.

The lightning didn’t stop when the roof of the White House went up in flames, though. It just kept striking.

And it didn’t stop striking until the White House was nothing more than a pile of smoldering rubble.

Then Prince Beef’s phone rang. He answered it. “Yes?” More than a little annoyed to be interrupted at watching such a scene.

Yes, he’s weird.

“Hey, Beefy, I’s angry. If you doesn’t done get your dudes out of my place in five more minutes, your palace is next,” Manly-man said. He didn’t sound angry.

Prince Beef couldn’t talk for a moment. He couldn’t believe he had been called Beefy.

Before Prince Beef could say anything, Manly-Man continued, “I’s tried to have talks with your stupid general…but he was stubborn.”

“My man!” Prince Beef said. “There will be no deals, and there’ll be no threats, you scheming swine!” I don’t think the prince even knew what he was talking about.

“Hey, I’s give you five minutes to think about it. My little wrestling arena don’t hurt nobody.”

“How you yak on. I have no idea what you’re speaking about!”

“Oh, but you better find out. I’s give you five minutes. Thanks. Bye.” Manly-Man hung up.

I think Prince Beef was worried despite himself. Manly-Man wasn’t one to be played with. Despite what he would say on the subject. So the prince had his men look into the matter. What could possibly have made Manly-Man angry?

Now, while Prince Beef struggles to find out something he should have known, I think there is some information I need to tell you.

You see, there are a few theories on where Manly-Man got the power to use lightning from. This was not the first time he used it, though it usually was rare.

Some people say that Manly-Man can do it with his mechanical suit, or that he somehow has control over storm clouds. But it’s neither of these.

Here is the rumor I’m pretty sure of. Manly-Man is unnaturally strong, and it is said that years ago he was able to convince the ‘god’ Zeus that he was Hercules. And after that, he was able to get into Zeus’s lightning machine (which is merged with a computer that allows him to see everything [editor’s note: One of the SuperComputers]) and strike almost anything in the world with lightning.

The god Zeus is a totally different subject. He…and his other ‘gods’ are complicated. Not really gods, of course, just strange Punchyish beings. Whatever.

Prince Beef’s men came and told him what was what. The general had ordered a raid of Manly-Man’s world-famous and world-popular fighting arena.

They had shut it down because Manly-Man refused to pay taxes.

Just as Prince Beef got this information, the lightning began to strike.

Prince Beef called Manly-Man.

“Hey, yeah?” Manly-Man sounded busy.

“I will remove my troops from the building, if you repay me for the loss of the White House.”

“Hey…I can’t hear you. All this lightning is getting in my ears.”

“My man! You listen to me. Or there will be no deals!”

“Oh… there goes your lightning rod. It went fast.”

The thunder was very loud now.

“We have to evacuate, sir!” a servant yelled. And then the servant ran.

Prince Beef had no choice but to follow, even as he tried to reason with Manly-Man.

Once out on the lawn, the prince said, “Now, my man, quit striking my buildings with—”

At that moment, the entire palace went up, as three successive bolts hit it. The resulting thunder was deafening.

“Oh no,” Manly-Man said.

Prince Beef just stared at the palace. It began to crumble.

“So…does you want to get your troops out now?” Manly-Man asked.

And Manly-Man won that day. With Prince Beef in the open, the prince had no choice but to listen. Mr. Magi was nowhere in the area, either, so Manly-Man had free rein. Mr. Magi was probably napping…

So, there you have it. One of the famous feats of Manly-Man. He got his arena back, I assure you.

Advertisements

155 Responses to “Manly-Man’s Feats (#1) by Nicholas Warren”


  1. 1 AmyRose August 1, 2014 at 23:19

    Geeze a wheezee … just wishin’ I was there to see those lightnin’ bolts to catch with me camera. Ive been tryin and trying and fast outta luck. It’s been rainin’ cats and dogs here, yet every time it lightning’s out, Ize be sleepin’. Jeepers creepers. I need to catch me some lightnin’ bolts. Next time this happens, ya gotta tell me so I can BE there to catch all the action. THEN I will have proof positive IF MM is tellin’ the truth and all. Photographers do come in handy sometimes, ya know. *winks* Call me. 1-800-THE-PINK. *throws kisses* Thanks, y’all!

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke August 3, 2014 at 22:30

      *puts the kisses in a wicker bag* Isn’t the rain great?

      • 3 AmyRose August 3, 2014 at 23:48

        Not when the backyard becomes a swimming pool. *squish squish*

      • 4 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 13:14

        Ooo…that’s horrid. YOu should get a blowdryer.

      • 5 AmyRose August 4, 2014 at 13:22

        Would a wet-vac do?

      • 6 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 13:24

        It just might. Do you have one?

      • 7 AmyRose August 4, 2014 at 14:45

        Yup, I do I do indeed! I think I will just let Mother Nature dry things up. A wet-vac sounds like too much work for me. I am about today to take more pics of flowers. Now what better day could this be?

      • 8 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 15:25

        Oh yes…do you have any red ones?

      • 9 AmyRose August 4, 2014 at 15:48

        YUP! Red it is indeed! How did you know?

      • 10 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:40

        Because red is a better pink!

      • 11 AmyRose August 5, 2014 at 01:40

        You and YOUR red! *eye roll* Really! You honestly have a red faddish you know. *mumbling …. “unbelievable”*

      • 12 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 13:48

        And you have a pink one!

      • 13 AmyRose August 5, 2014 at 15:17

        I know. *grinning from ear to ear*

      • 14 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 19:12

        *laughs*

  2. 15 Susan P August 1, 2014 at 19:22

    It’s about time the MM got the spotlight. He’s been overlooked too often. :)

    • 16 Susan P August 1, 2014 at 19:23

      Did I miss the message that there would be no video?

      • 17 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 22:13

        Yes, sorry! Nick spoke about Monday. Do you suppose we should post the ripio video?

      • 18 Susan P August 1, 2014 at 23:53

        Ooops. It’s been that kind of week.

      • 19 Professor VJ Duke August 3, 2014 at 22:31

        Yes, for me too, Miss Susan.

      • 20 Susan P August 16, 2014 at 18:56

        Alas.

    • 21 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 22:13

      Isn’t he something? Mr. Magi likes to hunt him. That’s how I describe it.

  3. 22 Lady Cheetah July 31, 2014 at 20:10

    Is it just me or is it true that MM never seems to be or sound angry? He is one of the most level headed Punchiea in the PL.

    • 23 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 00:04

      Yes! He never does sound angry–not a bit! He just sounds…jazzy! Do you think it’s a gift of his?

      • 24 Lady Cheetah August 1, 2014 at 00:41

        I think some people are just made that way.

      • 25 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 15:57

        Like the professor!

  4. 26 The Dancing Rider July 31, 2014 at 19:02

    Manly Man is actually pretty vexing. I do like how he called the Prince “Beefy” though. I don’t know whether to believe him or not. It does appear that either, or Mr. Magi, had control of the lightning. Since I doubt it was Mr. Magi, who appeared to have been napping, then who? So…..I’m 85/15 that MM is telling the truth.

    It doesn’t surprise me that Beefy wasn’t given a chance. That wouldn’t have been very manly of MM, would it? Plus, Beefy was acting far too much a “prince” here!

    Glad DS wasn’t there!

    • 27 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 00:03

      Yes…do you think Zeus exists? I think MM thinks he was adopted by Zeus. And it would make sense that one of the PL supercomputers could have such power.

      He was! But I still feel like he should have had a chance, at least! Don’t you? Though you do have to love how MM handled the situation.

      I wonder what he would have done…

      • 28 The Dancing Rider August 1, 2014 at 20:40

        I doubt Zeus exists. The “adoption” is part of Manly Man’s schtick (is that spelled correctly? Oh, who cares!)

        Entirely likely that a PL Cray equivalent could have the power!

        Well, maybe one teeny chance for Beefy. But that’s it. DS probably would have smacked Beefy one upside the head, whilst uttering derogatory cur-related things!

      • 29 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 22:22

        Ah, close enough. I know what you mean. And what a great point! I’ll have to ask MM to talk about this.

        For sure!

        *laughs* DS would have. He’s not shy that way. But I wonder if Beef would have him arrested for that.

  5. 30 icedmocha34 July 31, 2014 at 18:37

    Beef is food!! :D

    • 31 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 00:00

      *laughs* He wouldn’t like to hear! Would you tell him that to his face?

      • 32 icedmocha34 August 1, 2014 at 19:13

        Probably…I can be mean sometimes. :D

      • 33 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 22:12

        Yes…well, I admire that you’d tell him! If only I was as courageous as that!

  6. 34 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister July 31, 2014 at 18:07

    Beefy is too cool a name for Prince Beef. *laughs* I called it. I saw Zeus coming right after learning the sky was clear….
    So I have a lot of wonders about this white house, but can’t express them. My expressor is broken. I think.

    I truly enjoyed this story. A little annoyed that MM hasn’t taken my advice over tutoring, but I followed along beautifully. I’m quite proud of myself. *laughs a lotta* (I enjoy MMs written voice as much as his speaking voice.)

    Thank you for sharing this, you guys!!

    • 35 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 23:59

      No! You knew Zeus was coming? But what is it you want to say, Audith. You must tell me know, dadblameit!

      *laughs* Isn’t he a jazz? Hey, do you think he’s as sweet as the professor?

      Our pleasure!

      • 36 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 1, 2014 at 03:26

        Yes, but tis a favorite topic of mine and iit was clearly hinted upon in the story. I thought… Hey, you can be bossy. *winks* Umm, as I said my decipherer is broken today. Brain hurts from saying good-bye. Probably…or I am buying time. Tis a long process.

        MM as sweet as, you, Duke? Not in a million years. Unless you’re the same guy, then it is highly likely. *laughs* MM is Jazzy. He told me once, or it was you.

      • 37 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 16:02

        I’m very bossy. And you’re confusing me on purpose, aren’t you? *evil professor eye*

        No, we’re quite different, you know.

      • 38 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 1, 2014 at 20:01

        Bossy is one of my favorite traits for a man. I think they should be for some reason. I might not be confusing you, so much as distracting you, because I am not always convienced that I know what is going on. *pleading hazel eyes* Your metaphors are harder than mine sometimes, Duke!!

        I wish I did know. I have always thought so.

      • 39 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 22:21

        *laughs* My metaphors are awesome. They confuse me, you know.

        Why so?

      • 40 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 2, 2014 at 03:22

        Some day I’ll catch up. Maybe it would help if you explained yourself. Tell me.

        *shrugs* I really don’t know.

      • 41 Professor VJ Duke August 3, 2014 at 22:34

        I can’t do that, you know.

      • 42 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 4, 2014 at 02:09

        I know.

      • 43 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 13:21

        And it’s a good thing!

      • 44 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 4, 2014 at 15:35

        *frowns*

      • 45 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:35

        Like the Joker?

      • 46 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 5, 2014 at 00:48

        Goodness NO! Now I’ll have nightmares.

      • 47 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 13:43

        He was kinda cool, you know.

      • 48 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 5, 2014 at 21:49

        Cool? Well, his face frightens me.

      • 49 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 13:35

        Really? Well, I suppose it’s a possibility.

      • 50 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 6, 2014 at 15:45

        Why would you be surprised at that, Duke?

      • 51 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 20:37

        Well…he’s so pathetic, isn’t he?

      • 52 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 7, 2014 at 00:11

        *considers your question* I’ve missed something about him, I think. You know I prefer Spiderman!

      • 53 Professor VJ Duke August 7, 2014 at 14:29

        Well, Spiderman is a hero, not a villan!

      • 54 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 7, 2014 at 15:14

        Which is why I prefer him, Duke. I don’t keep track of villans. Well, one…you. *laughs a lot*

      • 55 Professor VJ Duke August 7, 2014 at 18:27

        *laughing* Yes, I’m a villan!

      • 56 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 7, 2014 at 22:25

        A sweet villan. *wink*

      • 57 Professor VJ Duke August 9, 2014 at 14:22

        No, I’m not!!!

      • 58 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 9, 2014 at 17:45

        Yeppers!!!

      • 59 Professor VJ Duke August 9, 2014 at 22:05

        Peppers.

      • 60 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 10, 2014 at 03:07

        Goof. Leppers.

      • 61 Professor VJ Duke August 10, 2014 at 18:19

        Oh dear me.

  7. 62 Julie Harris July 31, 2014 at 16:25

    Manly Man’s got some skills!!

    • 63 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 23:30

      He sure does! Jealous is this professor! Aren’t you?

  8. 64 Debbie July 31, 2014 at 15:33

    Lightning strikes are nothing to play with — sounds as if Beef upset MM something fierce. I, for one, wouldn’t want to be on the bad side of MM!

    • 65 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 23:26

      Yes…but…but…do you suppose something should be done about MM?

  9. 66 L. Marie July 31, 2014 at 15:17

    Serves Prince Beef right! He shouldn’t have been so high handed with Manly-Man! I would have sen a few hailstones along with the lightning.

    I believe this rumor! Manly-Man wouldn’t lie.

    • 67 Jazzy Couldren July 31, 2014 at 15:24

      Hey, thanks! :} I’s glad you know I’s too manly to lie.

      • 68 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 23:26

        And you’re also too girly not to lie.

    • 69 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 23:26

      Oh my! But…in all fairness, Prince Beef was just being…a royal. And MM didn’t wait too long! *laughs*

      You may have a point there.

  10. 70 Simply Skeptical July 31, 2014 at 15:07

    Goodness gracious me. Manly Man sure does have fits of anger. With his rumored strength & abilities it sure is best not to ruffle his feathers.

    • 71 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 23:23

      It is. Only Mr. Magi crosses him, I think. Or Mortimer. MM has gotten out of hand, wouldn’t you say?

      • 72 Simply Skeptical August 1, 2014 at 11:25

        Most certainly has. Where is Mr. M. when you need him?!

      • 73 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 16:03

        Sleeping–as all the PL’ers would say.

  11. 74 erinkenobi2893 July 31, 2014 at 14:17

    It serves Prince Beef right. :-P

    • 75 Jazzy Couldren July 31, 2014 at 15:50

      Oh, it done did. :}

      • 76 erinkenobi2893 July 31, 2014 at 17:36

        How many strikes does it take to destroy a lightning rod, exactly, Mr. Couldren? (I want to note it in my science notebook in case I have to study physics.)

      • 77 Jazzy Couldren August 1, 2014 at 00:01

        Oh you know, it’s got to be enough to make the rod hot so it melts. I’s think it was about ten or twelve… or 20. :}

    • 78 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 23:22

      But why? What’d he do?

      • 79 erinkenobi2893 August 1, 2014 at 12:12

        He was annoying.

      • 80 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 16:06

        Just being a prince, I’d say.

      • 81 erinkenobi2893 August 2, 2014 at 12:36

        *giggles* You have a point. :-P

      • 82 Professor VJ Duke August 3, 2014 at 22:34

        He still needs a pie.

      • 83 erinkenobi2893 August 3, 2014 at 23:33

        A cow pie. >:-D His name IS Prince Beef, is it not? :P

      • 84 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 13:10

        *laughing* It is…so do it! So appropriate.

      • 85 erinkenobi2893 August 4, 2014 at 15:47

        *throws cow pie at Prince Beef, grinning like a mad woman*

      • 86 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:39

        *laughs* Prince Beef I’m sure, will give horrible orders to have us arrested now.

      • 87 erinkenobi2893 August 5, 2014 at 14:44

        He doesn’t really have authority, though.

      • 88 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 19:11

        Will you fight him?

      • 89 erinkenobi2893 August 5, 2014 at 20:14

        It depends on if he makes me–but if he does, he’s going to regret it!

      • 90 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 13:28

        He will! He can’t fight to save his life.

      • 91 erinkenobi2893 August 6, 2014 at 14:49

        So he’d better not provoke me. ;-P

      • 92 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 20:31

        Yes, but he’s too…dull…to know that.

      • 93 erinkenobi2893 August 6, 2014 at 23:13

        I’ll try not to be provoked in that case.

      • 94 Professor VJ Duke August 7, 2014 at 14:25

        Yes. Eat a few cookies or something.

      • 95 erinkenobi2893 August 7, 2014 at 17:08

        :-P Or plant a few sunflowers!

      • 96 Professor VJ Duke August 7, 2014 at 18:34

        Good point. Those things are lovely.

      • 97 erinkenobi2893 August 8, 2014 at 00:33

        *plants sunflowers and roses* I love roses, despite the thorns. Obi-Wan would say it’s a metaphor for life. I just love their scent.

      • 98 Professor VJ Duke August 9, 2014 at 14:27

        Obi-Wan is a metaphor for life!

      • 99 erinkenobi2893 August 9, 2014 at 18:11

        Well, yeah. He and Luke are the only true Christ figures in Star Wars. And Disney had better not wreck that!!!

      • 100 Professor VJ Duke August 9, 2014 at 22:09

        I want to see the new StarWars, you know!

      • 101 erinkenobi2893 August 10, 2014 at 12:16

        So do I, but I’ll probably be like, “oh, what a cute little Star Wars wannabe! But canon? No.” :-P

      • 102 Professor VJ Duke August 10, 2014 at 18:24

        Well…they might make a good one!

      • 103 erinkenobi2893 August 10, 2014 at 18:41

        It’s possible, but I don’t think I’ll be able to think of it as… Star Wars.

      • 104 Professor VJ Duke August 11, 2014 at 12:58

        Yes, I do know what you mean.

      • 105 erinkenobi2893 August 11, 2014 at 16:37

        :-) Thanks for understanding.

      • 106 Professor VJ Duke August 11, 2014 at 17:00

        *bows* Of course.

  12. 107 walt walker July 31, 2014 at 14:17

    I would like to be able to do that thing with the lightning. I think that would be very…well, handy.

    • 108 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 23:21

      But who would you use it on, Walt?

      • 109 walt walker August 1, 2014 at 01:22

        It would just be a trick I could keep up my sleeve. To unleash when the need presented itself. Like your katana.

      • 110 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 15:58

        Yes! I swoosh it out when I need it. But…would you be dangerous with it?

      • 111 walt walker August 1, 2014 at 17:48

        Well, is there a gentle way to throw lightning bolts about? Things tend to explode or burst into flame, which is scary, at the very least.

      • 112 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 22:08

        Yes, I suppose you can’t be gentle, even if you tried. I’m afraid we can’t give it to you.

      • 113 walt walker August 1, 2014 at 23:49

        That’s what I was afraid of.

      • 114 Professor VJ Duke August 3, 2014 at 22:31

        Don’t fear it.

      • 115 walt walker August 3, 2014 at 14:11

        That’s mean.

      • 116 Professor VJ Duke August 3, 2014 at 22:41

        Should I break the rules? I’m kinda all for that, actually.

  13. 117 PorterGirl July 31, 2014 at 13:22

    What an awesome story. I, of course, believe every word of it if MM says it is true. And he was acting in a fairly reasonable manner, I think. But then, I would think that.

    (Great work, Nick! I can call you Nick, can’t I?)

    • 118 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 13:27

      I think he was too, Lucy! But…do you suppose he should have given Prince Beef a bit…well, a bit of a chance really?

      • 119 PorterGirl July 31, 2014 at 13:30

        *laughs* he should have, but I am glad he didn’t because it made for a great tale!

      • 120 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 23:18

        Very good point. That’s what happens when you might be so serious: you ruin good tales!

      • 121 PorterGirl August 1, 2014 at 07:12

        Exactly!

      • 122 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 16:03

        *nods*

    • 123 Nicholas Warren--MPS staff member July 31, 2014 at 15:01

      Of course you can!

      • 124 PorterGirl July 31, 2014 at 15:03

        Hurrah!

  14. 125 FictionFan July 31, 2014 at 13:11

    Hmm…I’m not at all sure that I believe MM. Sounds like he might have been at Napoleon’s wine supply before telling that story…or perhaps hallucinating following a meal at Ruber’s. But the bit about Mr Magi napping sounds true…

    • 126 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 13:26

      Well, FEF, this professor would support it, I think. It’s from a reputable source. But of course, MM does lie at times. Wasn’t it awful that DS wasn’t in it?

      (Promise we’re working on skits and such! Really hard. Won’t last, promise.)

      • 127 erinkenobi2893 July 31, 2014 at 14:19

        It was awful indeed that DS was not fried by the lightning. :-P

      • 128 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 23:22

        I bet MM wouldn’t dream of hitting DS with it, though.

      • 129 erinkenobi2893 August 1, 2014 at 12:12

        I don’t know, it could happen…

      • 130 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 16:07

        You know what, I think MM just said that he has done it!

      • 131 erinkenobi2893 August 2, 2014 at 12:37

        I don’t know. *shrugs*

      • 132 Professor VJ Duke August 3, 2014 at 22:35

        Me neither.

      • 133 erinkenobi2893 August 3, 2014 at 23:34

        It’s something I wish I could have done.

      • 134 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 13:11

        Now now, don’t be too vicious.

      • 135 erinkenobi2893 August 4, 2014 at 15:47

        Ehhh, next time… :-P

      • 136 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:39

        Yes, maybe…

      • 137 erinkenobi2893 August 5, 2014 at 16:01

        :-P

      • 138 FictionFan July 31, 2014 at 16:21

        Reputable? MM? I’d have thought he would find that quite insulting… What was really awful was that my Schwarzy wasn’t in it! I don’t think I’ve heard from him all week – I may be going into a decline…

        (Oh, it’s OK – you’re entitled to a break every now and again, I suppose. *grudging face* Meantime I’ll just have to listen to last week’s again… *smiles wider than Woola*)

      • 139 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 23:29

        Only the professor would find that mildly insulting. That’s true! Goodness. But, in all fairness, I didn’t write today’s story, so…shouldn’t you bother, insult, threaten, and torture good old Nick about it? I would, if I were you.

        *laughing lots* FEF, you always put a smile on my face! The next thing we’re posting is sure to sink the whole operation.

      • 140 FictionFan August 1, 2014 at 13:43

        But Nick has a superpower that makes him impervious to my ranting – he just ignores it! It’s too effective and I’m working on a plan to neutralise it…

        *speculative face* A skit of the Titanic, perhaps? *dons lifejacket and brave face*

      • 141 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 16:07

        Let me know when you get one. I’d like to use it too…

        Oh, you’ll get a boat. Don’t worry! I’ll have to swim for it. (Won’t be as stupid as Jack!)

      • 142 FictionFan August 1, 2014 at 18:18

        We need to find his greatest weakness – you know, like the way the Professor’s insanely jealous of my Schwarzy, for instance – and then use that to torture him with. Any suggestions?

        I’ll secretly throw a rope over the side of the boat so you can be dragged to shore. (Not possible!)

      • 143 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 22:10

        Hmm! I’m not jealous! I only get cranky about it… Well…he doesn’t care about anything the way I do that way. How about we withhold his food?

        I’ll freeze to death! I think we’d make to the iceberg and climb aboard. (*laughs* I would have thrown him over.)

      • 144 FictionFan August 2, 2014 at 19:37

        Of course you’re not! *chuckles sceptically* Oh he must! There must be something in life that’s important to him other than food…surely! And starvation seems so extreme, somehow…

        Well, I’d need to come with you – if there’s a polar bear on the iceberg, you’ll need someone with tummy-tickling skills…

      • 145 Professor VJ Duke August 3, 2014 at 22:38

        Lifting weights? I really don’t know what he cares about. Maybe writing? I don’t know. Stave him, I say!

        *laughing lots* Just don’t get torn to bits, please.

      • 146 FictionFan August 4, 2014 at 14:51

        Lifting weights?!? He’s not MM, isn’t he? What a truly frightening thought…Yeah, I agree – stave him! Quick!

      • 147 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 15:26

        *laughs* Of course not! But I lift weights…

      • 148 FictionFan August 4, 2014 at 17:51

        You do??????? Good noodles!!! Smelling salts, quick!!! *imagines Rafa-esque biceps combined with Professorial c&a-ness and swoons completely away*

      • 149 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:47

        Haha…yes. Pushups and pull-ups, too, sadly. Though I’ve not done pull-ups for a few days.

      • 150 FictionFan August 5, 2014 at 01:38

        *sighs* Manlier than Manly-Man…!

      • 151 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 13:48

        More professorish too.

      • 152 FictionFan July 31, 2014 at 17:35

        And it’s still jolly splendiferous!

      • 153 Professor VJ Duke July 31, 2014 at 23:54

        *smiles like a woola stuffed on hamburgers (so he’s wider-mouthed)*

      • 154 FictionFan August 1, 2014 at 13:47

        *chuckles, chortles and snorts*

      • 155 Professor VJ Duke August 1, 2014 at 16:09

        Love the snorting part.


Say something...anything...O Punchy Family!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s




TPL Schedule

Sunday: OFF — Day of Shalt Nots

Monday: TPL Story

Tuesday: OFF — Because I'm Gone

Wednesday: Professor Speaks

Thursday: OFF — Because Yes

Friday: OFF — All Day Sleep Does

Saturday: OFF — Blue-Footed Boobies Need Fed

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email!

Join 1,876 other followers

Follow The Punchy Lands! on WordPress.com

Blog Stats

  • 114,747 hits

Join the Professor on Twitter!

Professorish Smiley:

==[:-{)=

or

==[:-{)+

Depends on the day, see.

Punchy Argot:

1. Dadblameit.
2. Humdinger
3. Chickit
4. Chicky-woot-woot
5. Malediction
6. Rapscallion
7. Gardoobled
8. Congratulilolations
9. Togoggin
10. Gargonic
11. Two and Five Gurgles
12. Rats and a Heifer
13. Two nods, a wink, and an astroid
14. A bit, bits, and little bits
15. Huff-Hum and a Roar
16. So many thanks, I can't begin to thank you
17. Ri-do-diculous


%d bloggers like this: