PL Reporter—14thE

PL Reporter

14th Edition
4 2014

~~~

Segment A
Punchy Proverbs

PP's

About Time:

(1) Time is that tricky business that nobody has time to think about, that runs slow and fast, and that can’t be figured out. ~ Mr. Magi

(2) Time is a tick—and then a tock. ~ Schwarz Tauptinker

(3) Time is more than vexing. It’s always yaking. ~ Prince Beef

Which proverb do you think best tells the story of time, PF?

~~~

Segment B
Severe Weather Report

weather

An army of killer bees are making their way throughout the Punchy Lands. It’s unclear what sent the bees in motion. This isn’t weather, yes, but it’s still severe.

Weather tip: When it starts to rain, wait and see if it will hail.

~~~

Segment C
Featured Story: Ruber’s Catering Chocolate
by J. Freedwoppen

“Chocolate must be able to melt!” Fats Henry complained. “This new un-meltable stuff just isn’t playing fair!”

The reviews for Ruber Salami’s new chocolate—which was just released onto the market—aren’t stellar. Are miles from good. Not close to fair. Below bad. And hover around horrible.

Mortimer Butterfield (CEO of the CIO) couldn’t be more pleased.

“It’s just a harder type of chocolate,” Ruber explained. “It won’t melt, and it will stay  in your mouth longer. I mean, let’s face it, the stuff that melts in your mouth after a minute or two, is just ridiculous. Our chocolate will last you an hour—at least.”
~~~

Segment D
MicP Studios—Behind the Scenes
by Nicholas Warren

I think VJ is a shy creature.

He had to go places over the weekend, and I think he wanted to hide. And he is really nervous about the Thursday debut. (Vid thing? See previous Monday posts [here], if you’re still in the dark.)

Really. I’m serious.

I don’t think he’d put the vid out on Thursday if I wasn’t here. Every couple minutes (Okay, maybe hours…) he calls me and tells me that he won’t do it. I tell him to take a walk. After all the time we put into it, I think I would…I don’t know what I’d do, if he didn’t post it on Thursday.

But I guess in a way, I can’t blame him.

After all, he is shy.

And he don’t like to be seen.

[Professor Note: I wouldn’t believe anything Nick said if I were you.]

~~~

Segment E
A Conversation

SCHWARZ TAUPTINKER: So, do you want some ice cream?
DRAKE: Have you seen Hubert?
SCHWARZ TAUPTINKER: Does he sell ice cream?
DRAKE: Is that what he’s been up to?
SCHWARZ TAUPTINKER: Isn’t it funny how we keep asking questions? Chickit!
DRAKE: Stop asking questions, then!
SCHWARZ TAUPTINKER: You sure? Tell you what!

~~~

Questions for Nicholas Warren? Comment here!
Need more information on any PL topic? Comment below to J. Freedwoppen!
Copyright 2014

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144 Responses to “PL Reporter—14thE”


  1. 1 Jackie August 6, 2014 at 12:12

    #1 is my favorite!! I think time is kinda illusionary which is why it’s so hard to figure out!

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 13:41

      I wish we could declare war on it, Jackie, and kill it dead!

  2. 3 Bethy August 5, 2014 at 20:47

    I do like Mr. M’s explanation! And you know what…I don’t like to be seen either. That’s why I avoid parties!

    • 4 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 13:31

      You avoid parties? Even if they’re playing games?

      • 5 Bethy August 12, 2014 at 00:06

        oh my yes! ESPECIALLY if they are playing games. Truly awful.

      • 6 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2014 at 00:34

        But…but…but…but…games are such fun!

      • 7 Bethy August 13, 2014 at 10:11

        I think they are a form of torture. For example the last party (besides my daughter’s birthday party where I didn’t really plan any games so it doesn’t count) I went to was a baby shower. So they gave everyone a clothes pin and said if someone catches you saying the word “baby” (at a BABY SHOWER!) then they can take your clothes pin away. The person with the most clothes pins wins.

      • 8 Professor VJ Duke August 13, 2014 at 13:25

        *laughing lots* But…that seems maybe fun! I could see where it would get annoying. I wonder what word could be substituted for baby? Maybe little one, or “the one”.

      • 9 Bethy August 14, 2014 at 14:27

        Well I will make sure that you can go to all the baby showers that I am invited to. I’m sure you could pretend to be me. And besides you seem to have such fun at parties.

      • 10 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2014 at 21:13

        Baby showers? Do guys go to those things?

      • 11 Bethy August 18, 2014 at 22:54

        Sometimes people have couples ones. Mostly guys don’t though. They do tend to go on and on.

      • 12 Professor VJ Duke August 19, 2014 at 01:28

        Aha! Mr. R would go, I bet.

      • 13 Bethy August 19, 2014 at 09:50

        I bet he would too! And I bet MM would show up just to show that he could.

      • 14 Professor VJ Duke August 19, 2014 at 12:04

        Good point. And I’d probably be tricked there.

      • 15 Bethy August 20, 2014 at 13:28

        That does seem like your MO *smile*

      • 16 Professor VJ Duke August 20, 2014 at 13:42

        And it’s not fair!

      • 17 Bethy August 21, 2014 at 15:13

        What’s not fair about it? Don’t worry I didn’t put you in a box.

      • 18 Professor VJ Duke August 22, 2014 at 13:19

        I’m always tricked. Dadblameit!

      • 19 Bethy August 25, 2014 at 12:26

        Well not always surely? Besides who is able to see into the future?

      • 20 Professor VJ Duke August 25, 2014 at 13:38

        Well, that’s true. So…I won’t be too hard on myself!

  3. 21 Me, Myself and DIY August 5, 2014 at 12:27

    Excellent job on the build up for the new videos. I’m intrigued. ;) I like #1. I’m pretty simple about that stuff though and that’s how I feel about time. So Mr. Magi wins for me this week. On the chocolate – if it tastes good – I have no problem with it lasting. But if it doesn’t, well then, ewww!

    • 22 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 13:50

      Great point! And thanks…this vid should be interesting! You’re going to laugh me to scorn, you know!

      • 23 Me, Myself and DIY August 5, 2014 at 14:33

        Hmmm don’t know if all the way to scorn. That remains to be seen!

      • 24 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 19:10

        *laughs* Oh dear professor me, you know!

  4. 25 erinkenobi2893 August 4, 2014 at 18:07

    I think Mr. Magi says it best, though Schwarz sounds most like the Doctor. Hmm, maybe Scwarz is a time lord?
    Another innovative idea from Ruber! I don’t think this one is as likely to catch on now, though…
    I don’t think the Professor is very shy. (And I think it’s Zez’s fault there are killer bees swarming the PL.)
    I’ve just begun my internship in Camelot, and things are already exciting! Merlin blew up the stables accidentally by accident (Sir Leon was not too happy about that) and I blew up a cake in the Prat’s face accidentally on purpose. Gaius had some wisdom to offer, and I pranked Kilgarrah with a typo turkey, and got to visit Balinor, and it was just epic! ^_^ I’m writing about in my journal–I will post about it as soon as I can get a decent Internet connection. Hopefully I will be able to post without having to use the free Wi-Fi at the tavern where Merlin never goes. Well, if Merlin and I can get my service to work, I shouldn’t have to.

    • 26 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:48

      Do you like the Doctor, Erin?

      Yes, I don’t think so…would you try his chocolate?

      Yes, to both! Nick is just…he needs a pie in his face, Erin.

      *laughing* How do you find Merlin overall?

      • 27 erinkenobi2893 August 5, 2014 at 16:46

        I haven’t seen enough of him to decide. Iris does, though.
        I would try anything once. ;-) And if it didn’t have an off flavor or aftertaste, I might try it again.
        I’ve been trying a new method, actually. Not just pies, but pillows and hairdryers! What do you think? :-)
        BBC Merlin is awesome. The Merlin of the PL is an awesome faker. X-P

      • 28 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 19:16

        I love the new method! I’m sure the hairdryers will be my favorite! Are they fun to throw?

        *laughs* Right on. Mr. Magi should do something about it, too.

      • 29 erinkenobi2893 August 5, 2014 at 20:21

        Hair brushes. Hair BRUSHES. Basically, my minions hold down the person I intend to torture by this method and I brush their hair. If it’s a manly sort of guy, just the hair brushing is humiliating. If it’s a guy who is proud of his hair or a girl, then I just ruin their do. >:-D

      • 30 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 13:29

        *laughing lots* That’s just perfect. Have you done this to Anakin?

      • 31 erinkenobi2893 August 6, 2014 at 14:51

        Not yet. Would you like to help me, Professor?

      • 32 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 20:33

        I would love to!!!

      • 33 erinkenobi2893 August 6, 2014 at 23:14

        Let’s sneak up on him, verryyyyyy quietly….

      • 34 Professor VJ Duke August 7, 2014 at 14:25

        Whispers: I’ll tackle him…

      • 35 erinkenobi2893 August 7, 2014 at 17:10

        *whispers* Good. I have the brush ready.

      • 36 Professor VJ Duke August 7, 2014 at 18:35

        *tackles Anakin to the ground* Let’s get him!

      • 37 erinkenobi2893 August 8, 2014 at 00:36

        *uses the Force to hold Anakin still and begins to make a mess of his hair* Oh, I’m going to enjoy this!!! >;-D

      • 38 Professor VJ Duke August 9, 2014 at 14:28

        He’s screaming.

      • 39 erinkenobi2893 August 9, 2014 at 18:15

        Oh, look. Padme’s coming. And she’s laughing! She thinks this is a great prank. Yay!

      • 40 Professor VJ Duke August 9, 2014 at 22:13

        Should we cut off all her hair? Look, Anakin is starting to whine at her.

      • 41 erinkenobi2893 August 10, 2014 at 12:21

        Ehh, I don’t think I want to cut off her hair. since don’t think she’d be happy about looking like Rapunzel at the end of “Tangled.”

      • 42 Professor VJ Duke August 10, 2014 at 18:24

        Didn’t like that look?

      • 43 erinkenobi2893 August 10, 2014 at 18:42

        No… I just think that I like her hair long. :-P Sometimes she lets me play with it and put it up in experimental hairstyles.

      • 44 Professor VJ Duke August 11, 2014 at 12:58

        She looks as if she would.

      • 45 erinkenobi2893 August 11, 2014 at 16:56

        She’s nice. :-)

      • 46 Professor VJ Duke August 11, 2014 at 17:02

        A bit dull, though.

      • 47 erinkenobi2893 August 12, 2014 at 12:05

        I don’t think so. I think she really subconsciously pitied Anakin which is why she married him.

      • 48 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2014 at 13:01

        It was a mistake and a few. Anakin needed sent to a mental institution like Crackjaw. Perhaps we should get him enrolled?

      • 49 erinkenobi2893 August 12, 2014 at 15:02

        Ehh, I think Obi-Wan would team up with Legolas and kill us both if we did that…

      • 50 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2014 at 19:58

        Oh we could take them!

      • 51 erinkenobi2893 August 12, 2014 at 23:24

        You think so? I doubt it!

      • 52 Professor VJ Duke August 13, 2014 at 13:05

        Well, dadblameit!

      • 53 erinkenobi2893 August 13, 2014 at 19:31

        We can, however, force him to get counseling. >:-D

      • 54 Professor VJ Duke August 13, 2014 at 19:50

        Yes, maybe with Mace Windu.

      • 55 erinkenobi2893 August 13, 2014 at 19:54

        I don’t think Mace Windu would want to risk his sanity with Anakin. :-P

      • 56 erinkenobi2893 August 5, 2014 at 16:46

        And sometimes egotistical, but occasionally philosophical. :-P

      • 57 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 19:16

        Yes, all true. Prince Beef is very egotistical, for sure.

      • 58 erinkenobi2893 August 5, 2014 at 20:25

        Actually, I was talking about the PL’s Merlin…

      • 59 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 13:30

        Ah! That’s true, too, you know. What you said, I mean.

      • 60 erinkenobi2893 August 6, 2014 at 14:52

        :-P Yeah. It’s kind of surprising when he does act philosophical, though. *puts cloak back on* I’m cold… this cold is so annoying.

      • 61 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 20:33

        Have some tea and soup. Yeah, he can be surprising.

      • 62 erinkenobi2893 August 6, 2014 at 23:14

        Thanks. :-) He can indeed. :-P

      • 63 Professor VJ Duke August 7, 2014 at 14:26

        It’s a wonder, for sure.

      • 64 erinkenobi2893 August 5, 2014 at 16:46

        He has his moments. :-P

  5. 65 Doug Thomas August 4, 2014 at 18:06

    • 66 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:47

      *laughs* He put it rather well!

  6. 67 John W. Howell August 4, 2014 at 17:29

    Love “Time is a tick—and then a tock.” It seems the ticks and tocks get faster every year.

    • 68 Nicholas Warren--MPS staff member August 4, 2014 at 19:20

      That’s for sure. It’s crazy…

      • 69 John W. Howell August 4, 2014 at 19:49

        So true

    • 70 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:43

      Yes, why do you suppose, John? Is it just our perception?

      • 71 John W. Howell August 5, 2014 at 01:10

        I think the older we get the more attention we pay to time and perception of speed seems real

      • 72 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 13:44

        Yes, I think you have a point, John. And I’m so old…so…I really feel it passing.

  7. 73 K. A. Brace August 4, 2014 at 16:46

    Time is a triple Mobieus strip where we always come to the same place but our perspective is always different which changes our perception of it constantly. Smiles>KB

    • 74 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:43

      Wow…I like that. But…KB…it’s a bit hard to understand. I think I’ll have to think on it, you know.

  8. 75 InfiniteZip August 4, 2014 at 15:50

    I like number two, like two words, tick and tock;) second hand goes click click click really fast;)

    • 76 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:41

      Yes, why do you suppose the second hand is always speeding right by?

      • 77 InfiniteZip August 5, 2014 at 09:14

        Not sure, tell you in a second…..;)

      • 78 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 13:49

        *laughs and waits not patiently*

  9. 79 Debbie August 4, 2014 at 14:59

    I can’t help worrying over chocolate that stays in one’s mouth for “an hour at least.” Golly, that must be a dentist’s dream — just think of the cavities!!

    An army of killer bees sounds positively horrendous! Run and hide, Professor, while you still can!

    I’m going with Mr. Magi’s proverb this week, though I’m not entirely sure “nobody has time” to think about time! I mean, it seems to me that we ALL spend a lot of time fretting over just how little time we have!

    • 80 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 15:27

      *laughs* Wouldn’t it be frightening? But…wouldn’t you want to try just one piece? Just once?

      I’ll try! Do you have them where you’re at?

      That’s a good point. How much more time would we need to be happy, do you think?

  10. 81 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 4, 2014 at 14:11

    There is no doubt that Magi knows best. What he’s telling us is to just live. He’s brilliant.

    Send MM in after the bees. I can send over my flowers if need be. Hail? I worried about that stuff constantly while on vacation. Cars are not worth that much worry.

    Chocolate is supposed to melt. Be delicious over anything you enjoy. Not a hard candy.

    Thanks for telling us, Nick. I bet he’s more excited than shy. He just needs you to reinforce his deciding to try something new. Shy. I’ve got that covered. I don’t believe for one second Duke’s shy nor do I believe he’ll be showing us anything he needs to be shy about. Stop teasing us, professor. We won’t see you Thursday, but we do hope for a video. Hope! !

    I’m familiar with the question game. Loads of fun… *laughs*

    • 82 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 15:23

      Great take on that, Audith. He is brilliant. And wise. I guess he thinks all the time, huh?

      Audith, can you play baseball with hail? We should try. Cars are important, dadblameit!

      But would you try this, do you think?

      Are you sure about that, Audith? Really sure? The professor doesn’t lie.

      I’m horrid at it, you know.

      • 83 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 4, 2014 at 15:45

        Thanks, Duke. He has to think all the time, I think. Probably has no real choice in the matter, and it puts him so much further ahead then the rest of us still lingering around wondering about time.

        I played softball with hail in Kansas. Youtube has videos of the stuff from earlier this summer. You know I’d love that. Mr. Warrior could pitch to us easily. Cars are better beaten and broken a little, so I don’t fear a scratch.

        Try the chocolate? Ruber’s chocolate hard candy doesn’t sound good at all. I would try it if you tried first.

        I’m 100% sure, Duketh. 99.9% sure that we are all falling for your dadblamery. I know you don’t lie. You stretch the truth.

        Good for you, Duke.

      • 84 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:37

        You know, I think Audith is right there with him. You know that?

        Now that seems fun! But I’m not sure I can hit… *laughs* You better do the hitting. Not a Vette!

        Well, and I would try a piece.

        *hangs head* Wish I could say you’re right. If everything goes according to plan, it will happen.

        *smiles proudly*

      • 85 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 5, 2014 at 00:55

        You do? You may have given me the best compliment ever, Duketh. I don’t feel that way, but love the thought of it.

        What if I can’t hit? I guess we’re better watching baseball. A Vette! Your favorite…

        *gets her toothbrush* Let’s go tey it then, dadblameit!!

        *waits* *pulls your head up* Look at me… Tis fine, Duketh. You will be fantastic. We all love you just as you are, okay. Do it! (I still don’t believe you. *sits eagerly at 99.9% for no new news* I do look forward to seeing what movie you rip. So many choices….

      • 86 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 13:44

        It’s good you don’t feel that way…

        How about frisbee, then? I love Vettes…

        *laughs* Okay, dadblameit! Look at you swearing…

        Haha. Thanks, Audith. It will be a wonder.

      • 87 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 5, 2014 at 21:52

        I never feel that way. Years of being told tis silly, I guess…

        Can we take the dogs? But what color?

        Yes, see what you do to me?

        It’s time, you know…

      • 88 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 13:36

        The PL has done wonders for my confidence. Silly is good!

        Yes…you mean the Shepherds? They can knock one over! Red!!!

        *smiles proudly* I do!

        Time for what?

      • 89 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 6, 2014 at 15:50

        I’m glad to hear it!

        Yes, and I bet they could. Red…should have guessed.

        Time for time.

      • 90 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 20:37

        Time for time…that sounds like an Audith poem to me.

      • 91 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 7, 2014 at 00:12

        Yes. Yes, it does.

      • 92 Professor VJ Duke August 7, 2014 at 14:29

        Aha! And you wrote that one, didn’t you?

      • 93 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 7, 2014 at 15:15

        I did… Hoping the poem worked out okay. You helped me get to that poem. Thank you.

      • 94 Professor VJ Duke August 7, 2014 at 18:27

        It worked out perfectly, you know. I loved it. And I didn’t even remember us speaking about time! (Until I saw this.)

      • 95 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 7, 2014 at 22:26

        *mumbles under breath curses and memory*

      • 96 Professor VJ Duke August 9, 2014 at 14:22

        Well, I’m old, you know.

      • 97 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 9, 2014 at 17:46

        You you are not…if that was you. I don’t believe it was, you know.

      • 98 Professor VJ Duke August 9, 2014 at 22:06

        You don’t? How thrilling. How old do you suppose he was? You know, it’s dreadfully easy to replace audio. For voices and things.

      • 99 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 10, 2014 at 03:11

        No, I don’t. Is that mean of me…you leave me so skeptical. How old? Hmm…I have no idea for all the costume. 25, maybe. Yes, I know this to be true, which is why I am torn as to believing that was you, Duke.

      • 100 Professor VJ Duke August 10, 2014 at 18:20

        Well…how can you be sure it’s my voice, then? I’m being mean, huh? I could just tell you.

      • 101 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 10, 2014 at 21:34

        You’re always mean. But you won’t and can’t.

      • 102 Professor VJ Duke August 11, 2014 at 13:00

        Oh, I can, actually.

      • 103 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 11, 2014 at 18:36

        No you can’t.

      • 104 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2014 at 00:21

        Hmm…really?

      • 105 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 12, 2014 at 04:49

        You’ve always said you can’t. ..I mean yes, you could…..but you’re not allowed….does that sort this correctly?

      • 106 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2014 at 12:56

        Well…but I can. Since that is the professor.

      • 107 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 12, 2014 at 15:59

        Oh!

    • 108 Nicholas Warren--MPS staff member August 4, 2014 at 19:21

      He needs some reinforcement, that’s for sure. So keep on him, Audrey.

      • 109 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister August 4, 2014 at 19:41

        If I was on Duke any more I’d smother him, Nick. But I will continue, promise. Always.

      • 110 Nicholas Warren--MPS staff member August 5, 2014 at 17:34

        Okay…

  11. 111 Simply Skeptical August 4, 2014 at 14:04

    #3 hits right on for me since when I want it to pass quickly (when in a doctor’s waiting room) and it doesn’t or slowly (when savoring a great meal) and it does. It never cooperates which is very vexing indeed!

    Ha, ha, when it starts to rain I run for shelter forget if it hails.

    Dadblame frustrating the converstation between Drake & Schwartz. Surprising Schwartz doesn’t scream – tell you what! (laughing)

    OKAY Nick are you implying that the professor is really going to make an appearance this Thursday? Really? I mean the man himself? Naw, I don’t beleive it. I’ll be tuning in, front row seat, first thing. Of course, this could be just dablamery. :-)

    • 112 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 15:22

      Right on! But have you asked it to cooperate nicely?

      Some say you can play baseball with hail, though!

      *laughs* Indeed! I might have, you know.

    • 113 Nicholas Warren--MPS staff member August 4, 2014 at 19:22

      Uh-huh. I say what I mean, and mean what I say. If only he doesn’t back out.

  12. 114 FictionFan August 4, 2014 at 13:52

    Well, surely no-one can deny my Schwarzy’s brilliance now? So profound and yet summed up so neatly! Unlike the rambling old Magi, who clearly needs another nap, and Prince Beef sounds as if he’s still suffering from MM’s lightning strike.

    I thought I told you not to let Ruber make chocolate?!?!? Really, the man is a grade A menace and should be banned! Set the killer bees loose on him…but make them nice and angry first!

    (Aw, the idea of a shy Prof’s kinda c&a…) I suggest the professor should be more nervous about what will happen to him if we don’t get the vid on Thursday than if we do! *threatening face* Although it might be fun to annoy Nick…

    *laughing lots* That last conversation really encapsulates the whole essence of Punchiness…

    • 115 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 15:20

      Now, FEF! I thought Mr. Magi’s was rather spicy. And you know, the professor is never wrong about such things, don’t you?

      That might kill him!!!! And this professor can’t control Ruber. You know he’s 6’8″. (Is the professor a grade A menace?)

      Yes, fun to annoy Nick! Do I have your permission then, PEP, too cancel the scheduled release?

      *laughs* You’re right. Lots of questions…isn’t that just great?

      • 116 FictionFan August 4, 2014 at 17:39

        Oh, Mr Magi’s was silly! Of course we have time to think about time! Or how could he have written the silly thing? No, no – accept it. Schwarzy’s the greatest Punchy philosopher. No wonder you get so jealous!

        (Grade A ++!!) That’s the plan!!! But I thought the Professor was 14ft tall? Able to handle Ruber easily, I should think, and still have a couple of hands free for popsicles…

        No, you most certainly do not, Vernon! Especially since you seem to be hinting elsewhere that we are to get to see as well as hear the Professor! Too exciting for words!! Punishment for cancellation will be swift and severe…

        …and no answers! Punchalicious!

      • 117 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:45

        That might be a good point. But I won’t believe Mr. Magi was contradicting himself. I just won’t.

        (*smiles triumphantly just for FEF*) Oh, well, I was on the small side for a Thark.

        *laughs* Vernon? I don’t know no fool named Vernon. *looks about for him* You mean, you won’t give me your permission? *growls*

        I have all the answers, you know.

      • 118 FictionFan August 5, 2014 at 01:32

        Personally I think Mr Magi is Shnoddy’s dad…

        I’m glad – you’d have real problems getting cargo pants to fit otherwise…

        No! Not even growliness will melt my heart on this one! You’ve promised us a Professorial personal appearance and as PEP *glows* I demand that you keep your word! It grieves me to say it but…I agree with Nick! (That would be such a funny joke if only you were British…trust me!)

        I know you do…it’s just that us mere mortals are too dull to understand… *dull face*

      • 119 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 13:47

        Did you know there’s an old rumor in the PL that says Fats Henry, Mr. Magi, and Daddy Salami are brothers?

        They don’t wear cargo pants!

        *laughing* Okay, then. I’ve got no options. Nick won’t let me out of it, I fear. (The whole studio would be mad. Hours went into this production. Lots of video editing.)

        I think FEF knows mostly everything about me. And we know you’re not a meme mortal!

      • 120 FictionFan August 5, 2014 at 18:00

        Good noodles, really? You’d have to sympathise with their mum, wouldn’t you?

        Oh that’s right! I’d forgotten about the…er…dress code on Barsoom. *closes eyes tightly and wishes she could close imagination too*

        I’m sure it will be great – and I’m truly stunned – genuinely – if it’s true that we are really to get to see the Professor! I would never have thought that would happen…

        Oh, I don’t – but I might know a bit more on Thursday! *cleans computer screen*

      • 121 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 19:18

        Some say they’re half-Punchy. Yes, I would think so…but maybe she deserved it. (I bet most women do, you know.)

        *laughs* You can close your imagination if you want to!

        Well…mostly… *laughs* I’m retiring Thursday, too, by the way.

        Huff-Hum! Don’t look, that’s what I say.

      • 122 FictionFan August 5, 2014 at 23:15

        Some men are well beyond what any woman deserves… *glares*

        If only it were that easy…

        Well, you’ve been saying you want to for ages – you shall be missed. If it happens. I guess we’ll all find out on Thursday.

        Oh, I wouldn’t miss it for worlds! If it happens.

      • 123 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 13:40

        I agree! I take myself out of such wars, you see. There’s men. There’s women. And then there’s the professor.

        Yes, I know what you mean. Let’s not worry about it, then.

        *laughing* You’re not supposed to say that! Thursday…that’s tomorrow!

        Rats.

      • 124 Nicholas Warren--MPS staff member August 4, 2014 at 19:23

        Yes, we must keep the pressure on. Otherwise…he’ll go into reverse.

      • 125 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:49

        Look out, Nick! I’m already going that way…

  13. 126 The Dancing Rider August 4, 2014 at 13:48

    I think Schwarz has the hand on “real” time. Mr. Magi has the hand on “philosophical” time. And Beefy is just plain literal. I like Scwarz’s the best!

    Love the weather tip, but fear I wouldn’t stick around to find out! Killer Bees are indeed severe! Wonder who’s going to get stung?

    Chocolate that takes an hour to melt?! UGH! What on earth (or perhaps what not of this earth….) is in that stuff? Did Ruber do this on his own, or did Scientist have a hand in this new chocolate?

    I’m not sure about Nick’s story. What to believe? Professor? Nick? Half and half?

    That “conversation” just irked me! Wish I’d had a little squirt gun, I’d have to squirt each of them a couple!

    • 127 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 15:18

      Great take on that, DR! Makes complete sense, what you said. Yes, I identify with Schwarz too.

      I hope no one! Do you have killer bees where you’re at? They’re not here…yet.

      Well…Nick just says things. I was shocked when I read that write-up. He’s always shocking me, you know. But…believe Nick.

      In the eye, too! It was Schwarz’s fault, thought, wasn’t it?

      • 128 Nicholas Warren--MPS staff member August 4, 2014 at 19:24

        Definitely believe me. If someone with initials for his first names, doesn’t back out.

      • 129 The Dancing Rider August 4, 2014 at 20:12

        Yes, definitely a gentle squirt in the eye. I do think it was Schwarz’s issue….

      • 130 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:50

        Yes…well…why didn’t you?!

      • 131 The Dancing Rider August 5, 2014 at 20:47

        Right then. Well, for starters, I was not present! :P

      • 132 Professor VJ Duke August 6, 2014 at 13:31

        *laughing* And that’s a good point.

  14. 133 L. Marie August 4, 2014 at 13:30

    I have to go with number 1 on the proverbs.
    Um, did Manly-Man have anything to do with the killer bees? Or are they due to Zez?
    That chocolate sounds perfectly horrid. How could anyone digest it if it won’t melt??

    • 134 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 15:15

      Mr. Magi…it’s a sensible pick!

      I would guess Zez, personally. MM isn’t that rotten. But this professor is. I assure you, though, I didn’t do it.

      Well, it just takes longer to melt. A long time. I must admit, the idea is dreadful.

  15. 135 PorterGirl August 4, 2014 at 13:11

    Do you know, I think Schwarz may have captured the essence of time quite perfectly in his simplistic view. He is a cleverer chap than people give him credit for.

    Bees! Oh no! Maybe distract them by planting a large amount of flowers off to one side.

    I think I like the sound of chocolate that lasts for a hour, but I’m not sure you can beat the wonderful melt-in-the-mouth effect of the real thing. Good thinking on Ruber’s part, though. A good effort, as my old maths teacher would say.

    Oooh I cannot wait until Thursday. The Professor mustn’t worry, it will be genius I am sure. And Nick is right – the Professor doesn’t like to be seen! Even though we all want to see him. Grr.

    • 136 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 13:24

      Yes, I agree. That makes the most sense to me. (But I think there’s more tocks than ticks.)

      Yes…I hope that would work. But killer bees! Do they like flowers?

      *laughs* Oh, his idea is horrid! Who wants that sort of chocolate? I wonder if it was his idea… Maybe DS’s?

      It’s a wonder, I know. But…this Thursday…

      • 137 PorterGirl August 4, 2014 at 13:56

        More tocks than ticks? I think you may be right!

        Killer bees might like killer flowers. It’s worth a try *laughs*

        Probably DS’s idea. I am wondering and wondering what the chocolate tastes like. Maybe DS fancies himself as a latter day Willy Wonka? (What a thought!)

        This Thursday… I shall be right behind you Professor! Have no fear, all will be fabulous. And if it’s not… MM and I shall avenge you!

      • 138 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 15:21

        *laughing* *proud face, too*

        Hahaha! Killer flowers…the ones that eat things?

        It is a scary thought indeed! Wouldn’t eat that chocolate for anything. Well, I might try it. Would you?

        Aw, thanks, Lucy! Means so much to me. I’ll just have to hide, you know.

      • 139 PorterGirl August 4, 2014 at 15:28

        Killer flowers – they have gangster hats and little machine guns. They’ll soon see off those bees.

        I would probably try it, I’m willing to give most food a try at least once. I might need a doctor soon after though…

        Do not hide, be proud. Roll on Thursday!

      • 140 Professor VJ Duke August 4, 2014 at 23:32

        *laughs* Now that’s perfect! You know, I wish I was as flower like that.

        I’m sure we’d make it, through. We’d have The Dean try some as well.

        Okay! We shall.

      • 141 PorterGirl August 5, 2014 at 07:35

        It would be super to be a killer flower.

        I think The Dean might quite like it. He is unpredictable like that.

        Hurrah!!

      • 142 Professor VJ Duke August 5, 2014 at 13:49

        It would be. *sighs*

        He is!

    • 143 Manly Man (@JazzyCouldren) August 4, 2014 at 19:29

      Oh yeah, we would.

      • 144 Manly Man (@JazzyCouldren) August 4, 2014 at 19:29

        We would go beat everybody, and have a very fun little time. :}


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