The Fairness of Things

“See,” Schwarz Tauptinker said, staring down at the poured out candy on the table, “there should be equal amounts of red ones, blue ones, green ones, and white ones. This is just unfair.”

Mr. Magi raised an eyebrow. (Maybe it was both of them.) “Unfair? How can it be unfair?”

“Well,” Schwarz explained, “there’s way more white ones than red ones. Chickit! That means the red ones aren’t righteously represented.”

“Righteously represented?” Mr. Magi seemed even more confused.

Schwarz nodded. “Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.”

Smiles Riot, who was standing about, spoke up, “This sounds like a math problem from grade school.”

“Both of you are looking at this the wrong way.” Mr. Magi waved one hand about. “It’s not about fairness or being righteously represented. No, it’s about chance. Do you suppose each bag of candy is packed by hand?”

Schwarz and Smiles answered at the same time: “Yes.”

Mr. Magi sighed. “I bet you anything a machine does the packaging.”

Schwarz shrugged. “I just need more diversity in my candy.”

“And I’d like it to go away so I can stop thinking about math problems,” Smiles added.

Mr. Magi put on his top hat and picked up his cane. “I suggest you both get some rest.”

And he left.

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216 Responses to “The Fairness of Things”


  1. 1 erinkenobi2893 October 22, 2014 at 00:00

    Schwarzy should be in politics. X-D

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke October 22, 2014 at 19:25

      *laughs* He’d make a good mayor, huh?

      • 3 erinkenobi2893 October 22, 2014 at 20:23

        Indeed. :-P I would enjoy his speeches very much!

      • 4 Professor VJ Duke October 24, 2014 at 15:50

        I bet they’d be short, and sweet.

      • 5 erinkenobi2893 October 25, 2014 at 00:59

        Very sweet. ;-)

      • 6 erinkenobi2893 October 25, 2014 at 00:59

        Which is always a plus in a politician. ;-P

      • 7 Professor VJ Duke October 26, 2014 at 19:08

        *nods* Yeah…but he might get assassinated.

      • 8 erinkenobi2893 October 26, 2014 at 22:33

        We could find someone for a bodyguard!

      • 9 Professor VJ Duke October 27, 2014 at 13:11

        Yes! Maybe Henry, ’cause he’s so big?

      • 10 erinkenobi2893 October 28, 2014 at 11:59

        I don’t think he’d be right for the job. He would probably bully Schwarz around, and stuff…

      • 11 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:09

        Yes, and then you’d have to box his ears.

      • 12 erinkenobi2893 October 29, 2014 at 13:18

        Oooh! That would be fun, methinks. >:-D

      • 13 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 13:40

        I knew you’d love that part.

      • 14 erinkenobi2893 October 30, 2014 at 00:15

        X-D Yeah.,,. :-P

  2. 15 Sonya Solomonovich October 12, 2014 at 04:23

    Were the candies made by Ruber Salami?

    • 16 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 12:30

      No, I don’t think so. By Mortimer Butterfield actually.

  3. 17 Susan P October 11, 2014 at 00:19

    Mean? No. More like annoying.

    • 18 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 12:27

      Are you positive?

      • 19 Susan P October 13, 2014 at 13:46

        Negative.

      • 20 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 22:43

        *laughs*

      • 21 Susan P October 13, 2014 at 23:58

        *tickles the professor’s chin with an ostrich feather*

      • 22 Professor VJ Duke October 14, 2014 at 12:07

        *laughs* Now whatever for!

      • 23 Susan P October 24, 2014 at 16:27

        Because I can and because you needed it!

      • 24 Professor VJ Duke October 26, 2014 at 19:03

        I did not! *humph noodles*

      • 25 Susan P October 26, 2014 at 20:30

        You know you did!

      • 26 Professor VJ Duke October 27, 2014 at 13:10

        I needed…a cherry candy!

      • 27 Susan P October 27, 2014 at 15:47

        On the end of an ostrich feather…

      • 28 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:28

        Yucketh, madam!

      • 29 Susan P October 28, 2014 at 12:51

        laughing

        Fie, sir, how dare you disparage me?

      • 30 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:12

        *laughs lots* Rats! What should be done now?

      • 31 Susan P October 28, 2014 at 23:03

        Now you should look over your shoulder a lot.

      • 32 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 13:30

        A sword is coming, I Fear.

      • 33 Susan P October 29, 2014 at 14:20

        And maybe some throwing knives.

      • 34 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 20:46

        I love those.

      • 35 Susan P October 29, 2014 at 22:42

        Do you practice?

      • 36 Professor VJ Duke October 30, 2014 at 13:17

        I do, but not much as of late.

      • 37 Susan P October 30, 2014 at 13:47

        Practice makes perfect.

      • 38 Professor VJ Duke October 30, 2014 at 22:03

        Except in matters of the heart.

      • 39 Susan P October 30, 2014 at 23:03

        You have a heart? Why did I now hear this before now? ;)

      • 40 Professor VJ Duke October 31, 2014 at 18:44

        Oops…you’re right. I haven’t a heart.

      • 41 Susan P November 1, 2014 at 00:00

        Too late.

      • 42 Professor VJ Duke November 1, 2014 at 17:30

        Tis not!!!

      • 43 Susan P November 1, 2014 at 20:10

        Ah, but it is.

      • 44 Professor VJ Duke November 2, 2014 at 23:54

        *holds ears*

      • 45 Susan P November 3, 2014 at 14:09

        *teacher look*

      • 46 Professor VJ Duke November 3, 2014 at 15:41

        *hides*

      • 47 Susan P November 3, 2014 at 15:43

        *tosses a lit firecracker into the hiding place and whistles as she walks away*

      • 48 Professor VJ Duke November 3, 2014 at 15:46

        *runs out too*

      • 49 Susan P November 3, 2014 at 18:38

        Aren’t you the least bit curious?

      • 50 Professor VJ Duke November 3, 2014 at 21:12

        Yes, I really am…

      • 51 Susan P November 3, 2014 at 21:25

        You act like Cool Hand Luke.

      • 52 Professor VJ Duke November 4, 2014 at 14:17

        Nice. Is that Paul?

      • 53 Susan P November 4, 2014 at 20:52

        Who wants to know?

      • 54 Professor VJ Duke November 5, 2014 at 13:45

        The professor!

      • 55 Susan P November 5, 2014 at 15:00

        Do I know him?

      • 56 Professor VJ Duke November 5, 2014 at 21:13

        Mostly ,yes.

      • 57 Susan P November 5, 2014 at 22:41

        What doth that meaneth?

      • 58 Professor VJ Duke November 6, 2014 at 13:40

        Well, you know!

  4. 59 The Lite Rider October 10, 2014 at 13:38

    And that’s why I love Mr. Magi! Oh, heaven forbid, PC should come to the PL!

    • 60 Professor VJ Duke October 10, 2014 at 14:13

      *laughs* That’d be just horrible. But I bet DS wouldn’t take it!

  5. 61 Nancy Loderick October 9, 2014 at 20:01

    Well Professor,

    One could always just buy more bags of candy and divide up the colors oneself. And eat the left overs so all is even.

    Yes, I think I would eat the leftovers.

    Nancy

    • 62 Professor VJ Duke October 10, 2014 at 14:06

      Oh! Now that is an idea. A very good idea. We might not have to declare war after all!

      • 63 Nancy Loderick October 14, 2014 at 15:40

        Hey Professor,

        War is hardly ever a good thing. It might even completely destroy the candy, which would be a terrible tragedy. :)

        Nancy

      • 64 Professor VJ Duke October 14, 2014 at 20:30

        Good point. Rats. But what’s a warrior like me supposed to do?

  6. 65 Bethy October 9, 2014 at 13:27

    I do like my candy to be even. But it usually isn’t, so I just keep eating it until it is even.

    • 66 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 19:42

      That’s the way, too. But…doesn’t it make you want to complain?

      • 67 Bethy October 10, 2014 at 14:02

        Um…no because its candy and really it tastes good no matter how uneven the colors are. Maybe I ate too many smarties when I was little and since they are so unevenly colored I got used to the idea. I do remember fighting over the smarties rolls with the most green ones though.

      • 68 Professor VJ Duke October 10, 2014 at 14:14

        There you are, then. I’d take the one with the most red.

      • 69 Bethy October 10, 2014 at 14:30

        red is yummy too.

      • 70 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 12:22

        Red is always the best, I hear.

      • 71 Bethy October 13, 2014 at 13:05

        I think so! Red’s my favorite color.

      • 72 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 22:39

        That what Susan was saying. She said that’s why I couldn’t have a red cape.

      • 73 Bethy October 16, 2014 at 14:47

        Because it is my favorite color You have to pick a different color? You sure she wasn’t just looking out for you? Capes are pretty dangerous no matter what their color.

      • 74 Professor VJ Duke October 16, 2014 at 23:03

        But why?

      • 75 Bethy October 20, 2014 at 10:14

      • 76 Professor VJ Duke October 20, 2014 at 18:59

        *laughing* She does have a good point. Mine would be extra short, though!

      • 77 Bethy October 20, 2014 at 19:27

        Well maybe that might be okay then. I wouldn’t want the worry myself.

      • 78 Professor VJ Duke October 21, 2014 at 14:24

        It is disappointing, because they’re so cool looking!

      • 79 Bethy October 22, 2014 at 12:54

        Yes, you are correct. I think hoop skirts are cool looking too, but there just aren’t any around.

      • 80 Professor VJ Duke October 22, 2014 at 19:34

        Hoop skirts? What’s that?

      • 81 Bethy October 25, 2014 at 01:14

        I believe they were popular in the late 1800’s. They were petticoat that women wore under their skirts. They had thin pieces of wood sewn into them and they helped their long skirts stand out. They sound like fun but they might be a bit of a pain also

      • 82 Professor VJ Duke October 26, 2014 at 19:09

        Wood? Now that sounds horribly uncomfortable. (Root for the Pats.)

      • 83 Bethy October 27, 2014 at 13:12

        thin bendy wood. I think the whole huge skits thing made it harder to get around personally.

        Root for the pats?

      • 84 Professor VJ Duke October 27, 2014 at 13:18

        It must have…imagine how hot one would have been!

        Yes, the Patriots!

      • 85 Bethy October 28, 2014 at 13:58

        Yes, all the clothing makes me feel claustrophobic.

        Um…okay.

      • 86 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:17

        Maybe they should have just worn a robe, then.

        Now that doesn’t sound too enthralled.

      • 87 Bethy October 28, 2014 at 20:27

        Well I know less then nothing about sports. I’m guessing its a sport team? I was never enthralled with sports (‘cept maybe soccer) and my husband doesn’t watch a single sport so I really don’t know one bit about them.

      • 88 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 13:25

        Humph noodles. Well, they’re the NewEngland Patriots…it’s football.

      • 89 Bethy October 29, 2014 at 19:24

        Ah ha. See I learned something I didn’t know.

      • 90 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 20:55

        Me too.

      • 91 Bethy October 31, 2014 at 13:04

        Do you like all football or just the Pats?

      • 92 Professor VJ Duke October 31, 2014 at 18:56

        I enjoy football…but probably just the Pats!

  7. 93 walt walker October 9, 2014 at 00:10

    Good to see Smiles back. What’s he been up to?

    • 94 walt walker October 9, 2014 at 00:10

      He’s my favorite, you know.

      • 95 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 12:52

        I thought the Veezler was?

      • 96 walt walker October 10, 2014 at 20:26

        I thought I’d answered this but I fear it didn’t take. My WP is acting oddly. Anywho, I meant to say that the Veeze is my favorite, but Smiles Riot is my favorite name. Although I do like them both in bunches of little bits.

      • 97 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 12:26

        And they’re close, you know. Real close, actually.

    • 98 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 12:52

      Well, I’m not sure. He goes from institution to institution. I do think that he baffles the doctors’ minds. Everywhere.

      • 99 walt walker October 9, 2014 at 17:14

        If I were a doctor I would try to out-baffle him.

      • 100 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 19:47

        You know, Walt, we could probably get you a position in the PL.

      • 101 walt walker October 9, 2014 at 20:54

        Could I be a Doctor of Bafflery?

      • 102 Professor VJ Duke October 10, 2014 at 14:07

        Well, yes. Maybe yes. What is it exactly?

      • 103 walt walker October 10, 2014 at 16:25

        I would be in charge of bafflement.

      • 104 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 12:24

        *nods* You might be good at it, too.

  8. 105 Julie Harris October 8, 2014 at 21:20

    Does Mr Magi have a uni-brow? Math has always been a sore subject for me.

    • 106 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 12:51

      I think he might…why do you ask?

  9. 107 icedmocha34 October 8, 2014 at 20:06

    We have this candy shop here called Lolly and Pop that is absolutely amazing! They have candy from all over the world…Japan, Europe…I like the European candy the best, even more than the US candy, LOL

    • 108 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 12:51

      *laughs* Wow! I’d love to visit that store. Do they have cashews in chocolate?

      • 109 icedmocha34 October 9, 2014 at 15:09

        Probably. The Aero bars are the best tho, the mint ones. *yum*

      • 110 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 19:46

        See? You never bring me one!

      • 111 icedmocha34 October 9, 2014 at 19:48

        Uh no, Aero bars are all mine! they’re so yummy…I horde them horribly.

      • 112 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 19:49

        *grumbles* Hmm…would you give one to Mr. Waters?

      • 113 icedmocha34 October 9, 2014 at 19:51

        Duuuurrrhhhh. But only because he’s dying of cancer…if he was a normal person, probably no. Unless he smiled at me…he has a beautiful smile…

      • 114 Professor VJ Duke October 10, 2014 at 14:05

        He does not! He looks like an orc.

      • 115 icedmocha34 October 10, 2014 at 14:45

        I happen to own an Orc POP (thanks Hannah!) and he looks nothing like that…

      • 116 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 12:23

        What’s an Orc pop?

      • 117 icedmocha34 October 13, 2014 at 22:00

        https://www.google.com/search?hl=en&site=imghp&tbm=isch&source=hp&biw=2021&bih=1037&q=the+hobbit+POP+dolls&oq=the+hobbit+POP+dolls&gs_l=img.3…2337.5198.0.5325.20.9.0.0.0.0.0.0..0.0….0…1ac.1.55.img..20.0.0.nmoQLXJV828#facrc=_&imgdii=_&imgrc=Yi-cSHb35NltSM%253A%3B-SueP2WjYQ9iuM%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.entertainmentearth.com%252Fimages%252FAUTOIMAGES%252FFU3741lg.jpg%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.entertainmentearth.com%252Fhitlist.asp%253Ftheme%253DHobbit%252B%25252F%252BLord%252Bof%252Bthe%252BRings%3B500%3B500
        my friend hannah got it for me

      • 118 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 22:49

        That is like the coolest thing ever! And you got the orc? Nice!

      • 119 icedmocha34 October 13, 2014 at 22:53

        Hannah knows that I really like the Hobbit, so she got it for me…for Christmas, i think. :P

      • 120 Professor VJ Duke October 14, 2014 at 12:03

        And the pale orc must be your favorite. He’s mine, you know.

  10. 121 Simply Skeptical October 8, 2014 at 15:59

    Without a doubt good old Schwartz brings up a good point! Diverstiy – It’s all about political correctness afterall candy or not! (Laughing) This should be reported to the COO. Is that PL’s Candy Co.?

    • 122 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 12:49

      The CIO, I think you mean. It’s a vexing matter for sure, I’d say. Schwarz made it more so. And so did Mr. Magi, you know.

      • 123 Simply Skeptical October 9, 2014 at 21:32

        Oh thank you! CIO and what exactly does that stand for? The is purely punchyish you know. (grins)

      • 124 Professor VJ Duke October 10, 2014 at 14:07

        The Chocolate & Ice Cream Organization, I believe. *laughs*

  11. 125 L. Marie October 8, 2014 at 15:55

    I agree with Schwarz. Diversity rules!
    I also am glad that Smiles Riot is around.

    • 126 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 12:48

      But, Linda, wouldn’t you rather have all red M&M’s in a package?

      • 127 L. Marie October 10, 2014 at 14:39

        Though red is my favorite color, red with another color (like yellow) works well. :-)

      • 128 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 12:22

        Good point. Red and yellow…and…black!

  12. 129 Debbie October 8, 2014 at 15:28

    It sounds as if Mr. Magi is the voice of reason here today. Most candy, I imagine, is packaged by machines so it’s purely chance how many of each color is inserted. That said, their discussion borders on something a town council might mull over, don’t you think? I mean, it seems to be a veiled intent to bring about equality (when such a thing is often futile!)

    • 130 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 12:47

      *nods* Definitely something some sort of government would do somewhere at sometime. Though, I might do it too. For instance, a bag full of red skittles would be a treat, wouldn’t it?

  13. 131 FictionFan October 8, 2014 at 14:24

    As usual, my Schwarzy cuts through to the heart of the matter – the inherent unfairness of life. What a great thinker he is – a true philospoher! But the easy way to resolve the issue is to eat all the candy…

    • 132 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 12:45

      But what if one gets fat from all that? You see, Schwarz might be fat. Do you think he is?

      • 133 FictionFan October 9, 2014 at 13:25

        No, I do not! I think he probably looks like a cross between Darby and Rafa… *swoons*

      • 134 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 19:41

        *shudders* I was practicing Tennis today! *proud face*

      • 135 FictionFan October 9, 2014 at 23:11

        Did you manage to keep the ball in the court? Did you practice your spin? I’ve booked you in for Wimbledon next year. *proud face*

      • 136 Professor VJ Duke October 10, 2014 at 14:09

        I actually did. Getting the hang of serving. Once I do that (and get a new racquet–the one I have is wooden) I should be good to go. Wimbledon…wait…isn’t that the pros?

      • 137 FictionFan October 10, 2014 at 16:07

        Sounds good – glad you’re enjoying it! *smiles*

        Yes, but it’s not till next June so you’ve got plenty of time…

      • 138 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 12:23

        I think Rafa would hit a ball through my head.

      • 139 FictionFan October 13, 2014 at 15:33

        He would never be so ungentlemanly! But…even if he was, what an honour for you!!

      • 140 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 22:46

        *laughs* That’s the sixth time you wanted me dead!

      • 141 FictionFan October 14, 2014 at 00:48

        That you know about… *cackles*

      • 142 Professor VJ Duke October 14, 2014 at 12:10

        *shocked face* I bet BUS never wished it, or WOB!

      • 143 FictionFan October 14, 2014 at 14:49

        Oh, BUS thinks you’re sweet – but she doesn’t know you as well as I do. And you once wanted to beat WOB with his own femur!!!

      • 144 Professor VJ Duke October 14, 2014 at 20:29

        She does? She said that? *laughs* But I am sweet. I remember! *laughing more* But that’s because he was picking on you, and I didn’t know he was your bro.

      • 145 FictionFan October 15, 2014 at 00:41

        She does! You are? I mean, you are! She picks on me too though… *hands Prof a femur*

      • 146 Professor VJ Duke October 15, 2014 at 12:11

        You’re confusing my poor mind! Do you think I’m sweet or not? Just say no, please. But…we can’t beat BUS…

      • 147 FictionFan October 15, 2014 at 16:10

        The Professor is as sweet as a cherry-flavoured lollipop… You’re such a spoilsport, sometimes… *stomps off, huffily*

      • 148 Professor VJ Duke October 15, 2014 at 22:55

        Look at the contradiction there!

      • 149 FictionFan October 16, 2014 at 00:19

        *laughing lots* Can I help it if you’re befuddling?

      • 150 Professor VJ Duke October 16, 2014 at 12:13

        It can’t be my fault!

      • 151 FictionFan October 16, 2014 at 20:48

        It’s always your fault… *nods sententiously*

      • 152 Professor VJ Duke October 16, 2014 at 23:07

        That’s such a big word.

      • 153 FictionFan October 17, 2014 at 14:10

        It is! But not as big as antidisestablishmentarianism. *nods sententiously again*

      • 154 Professor VJ Duke October 18, 2014 at 19:06

        Wow… *stares in wonder* Can you say it again, please?

      • 155 FictionFan October 20, 2014 at 12:43

        I think the next antidisestablishmentarianism conference is being held in Llanfair­pwllgwyn­gyllgo­gery­chwyrn­drobwll­llanty­silio­gogo­goch.

      • 156 Professor VJ Duke October 20, 2014 at 19:00

        I bet people won’t be able to go… I mean, do they fly into there? Imagine what the ticket would look like.

      • 157 FictionFan October 20, 2014 at 21:31

        You’d need a six-foot wallet to keep it in…

      • 158 Professor VJ Duke October 21, 2014 at 14:33

        *nods* And how horrid would that be! Do Scottish ladies carry purses?

      • 159 FictionFan October 21, 2014 at 15:10

        Well, yes…and no. What you call purses we call handbags. But we carry purses to hold our money in – don’t know what you call them… the female equivalent of wallets? The men of course carry their money in their sporrans…

      • 160 Professor VJ Duke October 21, 2014 at 23:29

        Maybe they’re called change purses… I’m really not sure. Sometimes just wallet, too, I guess. Sporran? *laughs* I might like one, I think.

      • 161 FictionFan October 22, 2014 at 14:12

        Oh yes, I think I’ve heard them being called wallets – Americans are weird! *nods emphatically* You’d look fantastic with a sporran! Of course, you’d need to wear a kilt with it…

      • 162 Professor VJ Duke October 22, 2014 at 19:35

        Wait a second. You mean, you can’t put a sporran in your pocket?

        Americans aren’t neither weird!

      • 163 FictionFan October 22, 2014 at 23:15

        Haha! Not unless you have very big pockets! No, you wear it hanging at the front of your kilt – but look on the bright side – it stops the kilt from blowing up when it’s windy. At the front at least… *giggles*

        I’m not sure you’re completely unbiased…

      • 164 Professor VJ Duke October 24, 2014 at 15:54

        You mean…nothing is worn under the kilt?!

        Of course. I pride myself in it.

      • 165 FictionFan October 24, 2014 at 18:19

        So they say! Of course, I couldn’t vouch for that… *innocent face*

      • 166 Professor VJ Duke October 26, 2014 at 19:05

        *laughs* It’s so wicked the things you put in my mind.

      • 167 FictionFan October 26, 2014 at 23:31

        Me?!? I think not, sir! Who forced me to read a book about naked people, huh? I was so sweet and naive before I met you…

      • 168 Professor VJ Duke October 27, 2014 at 13:12

        *laughing* But that’s barely mentioned in the book! He doesn’t…dwell on it…like FEF did!

      • 169 FictionFan October 27, 2014 at 17:01

        I feel I must point out the the Professor himself raised the subject of the severe under-dressing situation on Barsoom in his very own ripio! In fact, had he not made SUCH a point of it, there’s a good chance I’d never have noticed… And frankly, it’s hard not to dwell on the practicalities of the subject – I worry for their bare feet on the rocks and stuff – and where on earth do they keep their keys?

      • 170 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:29

        *laughing lots* You got me there…rats. Well…maybe they hang their keys from their ears like girls do?

      • 171 FictionFan October 28, 2014 at 01:42

        *laughing* We do? That must make it so awkward to open doors…

      • 172 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:03

        Well, that’s what earrings look like. I can’t understand it.

      • 173 FictionFan October 28, 2014 at 23:10

        *chuckling* Poor Professor! So befuddled!

      • 174 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 13:32

        Am not neither!

  14. 175 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 8, 2014 at 13:46

    I understand where Schwarz’s mind is and identify completely some days. However, having Mr. Magi around with his rational thinking is helpful. I must find a bag with all green M&Ms…there has to be one. *agrees with Smiles*

    • 176 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 12:44

      I was thinking of M&M’s. Well…wouldn’t you rather red M&M’s? I bet MR. Magi doesn’t like them.

      • 177 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 9, 2014 at 14:03

        I do enjoy red, but there is something about the green ones. I love them like Yoda! He doesn’t like M&Ms?? I can help him with that, Duke.

      • 178 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 19:45

        Well, he might. I’m not sure. Yoda is green ’cause all he eats is green M&M’s!

      • 179 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 9, 2014 at 21:57

        You’re waevering, Duke. How unlike you. *chuckles* Do women chuckle? I think I did… Maybe I’ll be green one day, too. *crosses her fingers*

      • 180 Professor VJ Duke October 10, 2014 at 14:09

        Oh…maybe not. Do men giggle? I’ve been thinking on this for some time now. *laughs*

      • 181 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 10, 2014 at 17:35

        Giggle? Hmm. I suppose they can, Duketh. I think men chuckle and woman giggle. Seems fairly normal.

      • 182 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 12:24

        Yes, that’s the way it’s done, I think. Oh dear it’s confusing.

      • 183 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 13, 2014 at 13:43

        Don’t lose sleep over it, Duke.

      • 184 Professor VJ Duke October 13, 2014 at 22:43

        Yes, ma’am.

      • 185 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 14, 2014 at 02:14

        Now let me where your ball cap. My Cardinals are winning!!!!!

      • 186 Professor VJ Duke October 14, 2014 at 12:12

        I’ve noticed! *gag*

      • 187 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 14, 2014 at 19:21

        Awww!!! *hands you a bucket* How mean…

      • 188 Professor VJ Duke October 14, 2014 at 20:33

        The Pats are winning!

      • 189 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 15, 2014 at 04:36

        Yeah, well we lost tonight. *drowns her sorrows in rum*

      • 190 Professor VJ Duke October 15, 2014 at 12:13

        Hey! *laughs* Don’t be too much like Jack Sparrow!

      • 191 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 15, 2014 at 15:22

        It was all fictional…all but the Cardinal loss. *frowns*

      • 192 Professor VJ Duke October 15, 2014 at 22:47

        That’s because Mr. Warrior would probably holler at you.

      • 193 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 16, 2014 at 00:23

        Oh, yes. How do you know? He may encourage me for all you know. *knows you know better*

      • 194 Professor VJ Duke October 16, 2014 at 12:14

        He seems like a grounded fellow, who knows what’s what, I say.

      • 195 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 16, 2014 at 13:56

        Yes, always. You remember a lot.

      • 196 Professor VJ Duke October 16, 2014 at 23:00

        *smiles proudly*

      • 197 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 17, 2014 at 03:06

        *sparkles brightly*

  15. 198 PorterGirl October 8, 2014 at 13:14

    Aha, good to see Smiles Riot out and about, I was wondering about him, you know. I think I understand a little where Schwarz is coming from – if I am eating jelly beans and there are a lot of one particular colour of jelly bean, I always eat up that colour first to even things out a bit. I whittle them down until there is one of each colour left, then eat the final jelly beans in one go. Life isn’t fair, but I try to be.

    • 199 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 12:42

      *laughs* That is fair of you! Let me see…well, I should do this with jelly beans. I mean, it would be good for them and me. I’m just wondering if we shouldn’t file a complaint. Shouldn’t there be equal amounts in a package?

      • 200 PorterGirl October 9, 2014 at 13:21

        It would be good for them and you! (love that)

        But what if there was a jelly bean that wasn’t as nice as the others (like, a yellow one) then I would want less of those. There should be a system where we can each decide what proportion of each colour we want, and the beans be packaged accordingly. In this digital age it must be possible, dammit!

      • 201 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 19:41

        *Laughing lots and lots* It has to be! (I’m in a perfect rage now–the sudden.) Who do we approach about this? I’m thinking we might have to invade a local shop of sweets.

      • 202 PorterGirl October 10, 2014 at 07:21

        I think that too. There are already plans afoot to invade chocolate shops, sweet shops would be the next logical step. Let’s do it!

      • 203 Professor VJ Duke October 10, 2014 at 14:10

        *nods* And steal all the suckers.

      • 204 PorterGirl October 10, 2014 at 14:21

        Yes!

  16. 205 Angeline M October 8, 2014 at 12:47

    So who packed the candy?

    • 206 Professor VJ Duke October 8, 2014 at 12:48

      You know, I think it was one of Mortimer Butterfield’s stores. Which means, a machine packed it. Would you try one?

  17. 207 Susan P October 8, 2014 at 12:26

    I think purple should be represented, too. In fact, purple is a royal color and should be doubly represented. Then we need to find suitable dishes for each color.

    • 208 Professor VJ Duke October 8, 2014 at 12:47

      But isn’t purple a girls’ color? I mean…Mace Windu had a purple lightsaber…but that doesn’t count. Dishes too? *gulps*

      • 209 Susan P October 8, 2014 at 12:51

        Oh, well, once you begin to move in the direction of political correctness it’s all or none.

      • 210 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 12:39

        Yes, but that confuses this professor, you know. It was Schwarz’s idea. Don’t you think you should tell him maybe?

      • 211 Susan P October 9, 2014 at 12:48

        He never listens to me.

      • 212 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 12:52

        You both met on the beach once.

      • 213 Susan P October 9, 2014 at 19:26

        Is that what that was? A meeting?

      • 214 Professor VJ Duke October 9, 2014 at 19:48

        He was kinda mean, huh?

      • 215 Susan P October 9, 2014 at 20:10

        Somebody was.

      • 216 Professor VJ Duke October 10, 2014 at 14:07

        Not the professor!


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