Judging Perspective

“If you listen to me–at all times–everything should go rather smoothly,” Mr. Ratherquite said. I think he was trying to be humble.

“Maybe from your perspective,” Dr. Zauberer answered, “but definitely not from mine.”

Then Daddy Salami cut in. “I think you should all listen to me, then everything would go un-smoothly all the time. Hehaha!”

I nodded. “That’s more like it. For instance, you’d only care about your own…umm…prospects. What I mean–”

“Shut up, would you, P.VJ?!” Dr. Zauberer’s brow was furrowed. “I’m trying to concentrate. This is hard enough without you blathering on and on and on.”

“But, as I was saying,” Mr. Ratherquite said, “listen to me, and everything will go smoothly.”

Dr. Zauberer didn’t look up. “For you, maybe.”

“You know,” this professor said, “we really should keep quiet, and let one think–”

“Ah!” Dr. Zauberer said, the sudden, knocking his drink off the table. “Look here. I’ve thought of something. Perspective.”

“What’s that, cur?” Daddy Salami asked, but he wasn’t interested in an answer.

“Well, it’s just…perspective. Look here, from Mr. R’s point of view, we should all listen to him. But from mine, we should all listen to me. And from yours, Mr. Salami, we should all listen to you. And from yours, P.VJ–”

I interrupted. “Huff-Hum if I care.”

“Yes, but the point is: perspective!” Dr. Zauberer banged a fist on the table. “And how do we tell which is the right perspective? Or is there one?”

“I’d say,” Mr. Ratherquite began, “that every perspective is right in its own unique way.”

“And I’d say,” this professor said, “that the only perspective that actually matters, is that fellow’s over there.”

And I pointed to the judge of the game.

“He’ll be able to tell if we’re cheating, or making deals, or any dadblamery like that. For you see, he’s the one that does that sort of thing.”

Daddy Salami stood from the card table and threw his cards in the air. “I’m done playing cards with you gents. It’s not fun–and you’re all curs.”

He walked out, passing the judge.

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151 Responses to “Judging Perspective”


  1. 1 icedmocha34 November 1, 2014 at 02:15

    My Bible teacher always used to tell us “Don’t focus on the score but on the Scorekeeper”–the Scorekeeper being God.

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke November 1, 2014 at 17:32

      *nods* Right on. That’s all that matters, you know.

  2. 3 InfiniteZip October 29, 2014 at 11:22

    No dablamery, you are not dull either!!!

    • 4 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 13:39

      Are you sure, Zippy?

      • 5 InfiniteZip October 29, 2014 at 16:16

        Most sure….why are you unsure?

      • 6 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 20:54

        I don’t know…because I”m muddled.

  3. 7 erinkenobi2893 October 28, 2014 at 12:57

    I love the outcome. :-P The perspective of the judge. X-D Also, I think we should listen to all three, but be judicious in what we ultimately choose to do. ;-)

    • 8 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:14

      *nods* You wouldn’t say that if Palpatine was sitting there. I wonder what he would have said.

      • 9 erinkenobi2893 October 29, 2014 at 13:19

        I wouldn’t have given him a chance to say anything. A straight right to the jaw would’ve done the trick, I think. And I’m taller than him, so HAH. :-P

      • 10 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 13:41

        *laughs* Poor guy. You’re so mean to him.

      • 11 erinkenobi2893 October 30, 2014 at 00:19

        He deserves it, she said with absolute and total conviction. ;-P

      • 12 Professor VJ Duke October 30, 2014 at 13:23

        He was just trying to run an empire.

      • 13 erinkenobi2893 November 1, 2014 at 19:34

        Yeah, right. He was only trying to destroy all logic and sanity in the galaxy!

      • 14 Professor VJ Duke November 2, 2014 at 23:50

        Similar to what…Eragon would have done.

      • 15 erinkenobi2893 November 3, 2014 at 14:40

        Who’s Eragon?

      • 16 Professor VJ Duke November 3, 2014 at 15:42

        Isn’t he that dragon rider guy?

      • 17 erinkenobi2893 November 4, 2014 at 01:05

        I don’t know. *shrugs*

      • 18 Professor VJ Duke November 4, 2014 at 14:31

        I think he is.

      • 19 erinkenobi2893 November 4, 2014 at 14:49

        He COULD be… :-P

      • 20 Professor VJ Duke November 5, 2014 at 13:32

        He might be, yes.

      • 21 erinkenobi2893 November 5, 2014 at 13:37

        :-P

  4. 22 Jackie October 28, 2014 at 11:42

    Perspective is subjective. Everyone is right in their own mind. It’s too hard for people to see the perspective of others because most people are too self-absorbed.

    • 23 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:09

      Yeah, self-absorbstion is such a downfall. Should we find a way to make perspective objective?

      • 24 Jackie October 28, 2014 at 21:22

        I don’t think there is a way. But you’re welcome to look for one. In my opnion, I think it will be an exercise in futility if you try.

      • 25 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 13:27

        A bunch of dadblamery, then?

  5. 26 Catherine October 28, 2014 at 02:56

    I think the professor is very wise.

    • 27 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:03

      Aw, thanks, Catherine! I appreciate it, for sure. But…we both now I’m dull.

      • 28 Catherine October 30, 2014 at 14:06

        You’re welcome!! And no, you’re not!

      • 29 Professor VJ Duke October 30, 2014 at 22:05

        *laughs* Oh, rats and a heifer!

  6. 30 Simply Skeptical October 28, 2014 at 00:51

    Quite a tale of intrigue and to learn it was all in the cards! (Laughing)

    • 31 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:01

      Yes, it was a wonder, madam!

  7. 32 walt walker October 28, 2014 at 00:12

    Huff-hum indeed! I like that one, Old Sport.

    • 33 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:31

      *smiles bigly* Thanks, Walt. I say, he did deserve it, you know. I only use salty language when one deserves it.

  8. 34 Susan P October 27, 2014 at 20:33

    Sounds like an episode in Alice in Wonderland. I wonder how DS would feel if he suddenly became a deck of cards?

    • 35 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:31

      Probably cranky. Would he be the clubs?

      • 36 Susan P October 28, 2014 at 12:53

        He certainly is not the Queen of Hearts.

      • 37 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:13

        Haha. The professor is!

      • 38 Susan P October 28, 2014 at 23:05

        Wait! YOU are the QUEEN of hearts?

      • 39 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 13:30

        No, no! The king.

      • 40 Susan P October 29, 2014 at 14:21

        That’s not what you said!

      • 41 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 20:47

        Yes, but…you’re not being fair the sudden!

      • 42 Susan P October 29, 2014 at 22:47

        It’s a woman’s prerogative, you know?

      • 43 Professor VJ Duke October 30, 2014 at 13:20

        And maybe the professor’s?

      • 44 Susan P October 30, 2014 at 13:47

        Only if the Professor is a woman.

      • 45 Professor VJ Duke October 30, 2014 at 22:03

        What silliness! I’m a warrior.

      • 46 Susan P October 30, 2014 at 23:04

        So was Joan of Arc.

      • 47 Professor VJ Duke October 31, 2014 at 18:44

        Was not!!!

      • 48 Susan P November 1, 2014 at 00:01

        You need to reread a story about that woman.

      • 49 Professor VJ Duke November 1, 2014 at 17:31

        She didn’t fight, I hear.

      • 50 Susan P November 1, 2014 at 20:10

        Hearsay is not admitted in a court of law.

      • 51 Professor VJ Duke November 2, 2014 at 23:54

        Rats!

      • 52 Susan P November 3, 2014 at 14:09

        Rats are not admitted, either.

      • 53 Professor VJ Duke November 3, 2014 at 15:41

        Then I should stay out, I suppose.

      • 54 Susan P November 3, 2014 at 15:44

        Well, we might make an exception.

      • 55 Professor VJ Duke November 3, 2014 at 15:47

        You’ll have to make three for the professor.

      • 56 Susan P November 3, 2014 at 18:38

        Or five…

      • 57 Professor VJ Duke November 3, 2014 at 21:12

        Why?

      • 58 Susan P November 3, 2014 at 21:26

        Why not?

      • 59 Professor VJ Duke November 4, 2014 at 14:17

        *laughs* I do suppose that’s a good reason.

      • 60 Susan P November 4, 2014 at 20:53

        Well, I think that you should invite DS and Manly-Man.

      • 61 Professor VJ Duke November 5, 2014 at 13:45

        And Schwarz?

      • 62 Susan P November 5, 2014 at 15:00

        He can be the doorman.

      • 63 Professor VJ Duke November 5, 2014 at 21:13

        *agrees*

  9. 64 Lady Cheetah October 27, 2014 at 20:14

    Ok. Who is the judge?

    • 65 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:31

      I’m not exactly sure. Who do you think, Lady?

      • 66 Lady Cheetah October 28, 2014 at 16:49

        Oh boy! I should have seen that response coming…lol!

      • 67 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:20

        That’s not a very good answer!

      • 68 Lady Cheetah October 28, 2014 at 21:17

        *laughing* I have no comeback for that. *still laughing*

      • 69 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 13:26

        Rats and a Heifer! Tis not fair.

  10. 70 Angeline M October 27, 2014 at 17:31

    Uh oh! Here come da judge. And how dare Dr. Z tell the professor to shut up! I would take umbrage with that. I think Daddy Salami had the right perspective.

    • 71 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:30

      Yes! What should I do about it, Angeline?

      • 72 Angeline M October 28, 2014 at 03:12

        Challenge him to a duel. It is the only way to save your honor.

      • 73 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:04

        What should the weapon be?

      • 74 Angeline M October 29, 2014 at 14:46

        Sabers.

      • 75 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 20:49

        Nice! Not throwing knives?

  11. 76 weggieboy October 27, 2014 at 17:27

    Poor Daddy Salami! Everyone knows his perspective is the only one!

    • 77 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:30

      Hear, hear. I’m sure he told Ruber just that when he got home.

  12. 78 masgautsen October 27, 2014 at 16:22

    wise man that mr. R, he sure have a way with words :)

    • 79 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:29

      Yes, doesn’t he? But…do you suppose he’s a bit confusing?

      • 80 masgautsen October 28, 2014 at 04:34

        Great minds often are, I suppose

      • 81 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:06

        Now that’s a very good point.

  13. 82 Julie Harris October 27, 2014 at 14:59

    “Every perspective is right in its own unique way”… Mr. R is a wise one!

    • 83 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:27

      Wiser…than the professor?

  14. 84 FictionFan October 27, 2014 at 14:04

    I do rather see the old Sausage’s point. Poker is so dull. So, so, so dull. And then a little bit duller. I bet the judge was my Schwarzy though – everyone should always listen to him! (Blathering indeed! How dare he? Rude and crude!) What heavy moving door?

    • 85 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:25

      *laughs* FEF’s a betting woman! Except the professor. He won’t listen to him, you know. No, not at all.

      (Yes, wasn’t that mean?)

      “They’re moving in time, to a heavy wooden door.” You don’t know where that’s from? *shocked*

      • 86 FictionFan October 28, 2014 at 01:40

        I bet I’m not! That’s just ‘cos you’re so jealous of his great intellect and charm…

        (It was! You should have kicked him under the table and blamed the Sausage!)

        Hmm… I’m betting it’s some old rock band from when the world was young… WOB would probably know. Furthermore I’m betting the lyrics were written by someone under the influence of illicit substances…

      • 87 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:02

        Umm…I’m nervous now.

        (I should have! I don’t know why you didn’t tell me sooner!!)

        It is! The band is Genesis… And I’m not sure if Peter G was…you know, or not. Maybe he was. Probably was. I still like the lyric, though. Imagine an army of bugs!

      • 88 FictionFan October 28, 2014 at 23:08

        Of what? Schwarzy?

        (Sorreeee!! My psychic powers let me down…)

        An army of bugs? Yes, he really must have been, I think! Your taste in 70s music is one of the most… unique… things about you, you know…

      • 89 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 13:32

        Nah…he’s pathetic.

        *laughs* I might forgive you.

        Now that is a good point. “They’re moving in time, to a heavy wooden door…” *laughing* Yes, isn’t it odd?

      • 90 FictionFan October 29, 2014 at 15:44

        Ooh…

        Thank you!

        Genesis were one of the weirdest – I love the track title “Return of the Giant Hogweed”. Very odd – one of the many mysteries that go to make up the wonder of the Professorial persona…

      • 91 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 20:51

        *laughs* Love that title. I’m not a huge fan, you’ll be happy to know. But I hear Kenny G is releasing a new album!!!!!!!!

      • 92 FictionFan October 29, 2014 at 22:46

        That makes me exceptionally happy! You have no idea how often I was brutally forced to listen to Genesis when I was… younger! Brothers – Tchah!

        Oh no! Another 40 minutes of that sax! And those curls!!!

      • 93 Professor VJ Duke October 30, 2014 at 13:20

        *laughing* Poor FEF! And they were a weird band, for sure. And now I make you listen to classical guitar.

        Yes! And it will be excellent. Aren’t you excited?

      • 94 FictionFan October 30, 2014 at 17:13

        Yes, you and WOB do have certain traits in common. But I like classical guitar!! (And you’re c’er & a’er… much!!)

        Is it compulsory? *fearful face*

      • 95 Professor VJ Duke October 30, 2014 at 22:13

        Now, that’s made my day that you’re a classical guitar fan! *fist pump* (Aw! *blushes*)

        No, of course not. But I’ll send you the MP3’s anyway.

      • 96 FictionFan October 31, 2014 at 01:59

        *proud face* But I don’t know much so I still need my guide…

        Thanks! (What’s the opposite of a fist pump?)

      • 97 Professor VJ Duke October 31, 2014 at 18:49

        Ask me anything anytime. I’d be more than happy to give you a professorish answer.

        I’m not sure…well, what do girls do?

      • 98 FictionFan October 31, 2014 at 22:21

        Professorish answers are the best kind…

        Ooh, cheeky, Chicky! One day I’ll show you what I use my fists for… *digs out boxing gloves*

      • 99 Professor VJ Duke November 1, 2014 at 17:27

        Yes, I think so too. Very revealing.

        *laughs* I’m very scared–the sudden.

      • 100 FictionFan November 1, 2014 at 20:43

        Well…revealing wasn’t the first word that sprang to mind…

        Very wise!

      • 101 Professor VJ Duke November 2, 2014 at 23:58

        I don’t see why not…

        I was being sarcastic! Like Vin.

  15. 102 L. Marie October 27, 2014 at 13:30

    For once, I agree with Daddy Salami. I would have stormed out too, but earlier in the conversation when Mr. Ratherquite insisted that everyone listen to him. Or was he trying to impress the judge? But Daddy Salami was there to play cards. But no card playing had commenced.

    • 103 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:23

      Mr. R was probably just spitting out words to see where they splatter. I would have left, too, I must say. As quickly as I could have. I bet I would have. And I do think it awesome that you agreed with DS…

  16. 104 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 27, 2014 at 13:28

    You needn’t employ a judge for a simple game of poker, Duke. Do what The Gambler does…Kenny Rogers knows best. “Know when to hold’em and know when to fold’em.” However, if that doesn’t work I say y’all should go with your rules, then pass out cigars. That should make the gentlemen happy. I enjoy cards. One should never take them too seriously.

    • 105 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:22

      You mean you don’t bet swords when you play? Or guitars? You smoke cigars?

      • 106 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 28, 2014 at 12:46

        No, I’ve never bet swords, but I love the idea of you doing so. *smiles* How about we play cards and if you lose I get Baby Strat? *cunning smile* No! I’ve told you I don’t. Do you?

      • 107 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:10

        What do I get if I win? I do not, madam!

      • 108 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 29, 2014 at 03:52

        Well, I’m not sure. What do you want? Okay, I was just checking. Apparently we’re back to you not remembering that I do not smoke, so I thought I’d ask…

      • 109 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 13:35

        *laughs* No, I knew. I just have to mess with you from time to time.

      • 110 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister October 29, 2014 at 19:40

        *grins* I’d have you no other way.

      • 111 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 20:58

        *smiles bigly*

  17. 112 The Lite Rider October 27, 2014 at 13:28

    Love the perspective. ;-) Of course I laughed when Daddy Salami said listen to him and all could go UN-smoothly all the time! Oh my. Who is The Judge?????? (I also liked “Huff-Hum” lots!)

    • 113 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:21

      I’m not sure who the judge was. I think he was a fat fellow…greasy about the brow with a low cut haircut–if such a thing exists. He was wearing a stained t-shirt and black pants. Probably more details than you wanted, huh?

      • 114 The Lite Rider October 28, 2014 at 20:17

        UGH! But maybe he’s funny?

      • 115 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:22

        He’s got no personality.

      • 116 The Lite Rider October 29, 2014 at 19:25

        Ok. Well, just “ugh” then. ;-)

      • 117 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 20:57

        Yes, we should beat him.

  18. 118 PorterGirl October 27, 2014 at 13:03

    The Judge sounds quite mysterious – I wonder what he made of DS storming out like that? A very good point made about perspectives, there. I think everyone should listen to Mr R, if they’re going to listen to anyone. He is probably the most sensible. Or your good self, Professor. But not Dr Z. He is unstable, I think.

    • 119 Professor VJ Duke October 27, 2014 at 13:17

      Good point. But I do feel a bit bad for Dr. Z…maybe. He’s very interesting. He’s that sort of chap that one would want to follow about and see what he’s about. I mean, what’s he do in a day? DS probably wanted to play. And we were all debating. But I must say, he helped it along.

      Yes…the judge…scary?

      • 120 PorterGirl October 27, 2014 at 14:24

        I would certainly like to follow Dr Z, he is curious indeed. In my brain I imagine him doing all sorts of nefarious dadblamery, but maybe he just puts on some slippers and arranges flowers or something. Either way, I’d love to know! I think he needs a good hug to cheer him up.

        I think all judges are scary… who would want to judge people? It takes a special kind of mind to follow that path.

      • 121 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:26

        Yes, right on! A good hug would suit him, and I hear he likes flowers. But he also has nefarious dadblame schemes–like you mentioned. He’s such a personality.

        *laughing* I know a judge!

      • 122 PorterGirl October 28, 2014 at 08:19

        A hug and some flowers should be sent to him immediately. He is indeed a wonder of the PL, I am always interested to see what he might get up to next.

        Goodness! Don’t tell the judge what I said…

      • 123 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:07

        Yes, me too…it’s scary as well…

        *laughing* I agree with you!

    • 124 Susan P October 27, 2014 at 20:35

      All judges are scary.

      • 125 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 00:31

        Just like the professor.

      • 126 Susan P October 28, 2014 at 12:53

        Mmmmm–Maybe?

      • 127 Professor VJ Duke October 28, 2014 at 20:13

        Bethy thinks I”m scary!

      • 128 Susan P October 28, 2014 at 23:06

        Does she? Maybe she’s pulling your leg?

      • 129 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 13:31

        I hope not. All warriors are supposed to be scary.

      • 130 Susan P October 29, 2014 at 14:22

        Like Brave Heart?

      • 131 Professor VJ Duke October 29, 2014 at 20:48

        Wasn’t he a dragon?

      • 132 Susan P October 29, 2014 at 22:48

        Mercy no. He was William Wallace.

      • 133 Professor VJ Duke October 30, 2014 at 13:21

        Oh, that’s right. I knew this, of course. But I’ve never seen the movie.

      • 134 Susan P October 30, 2014 at 13:48

        It’s a classic.

      • 135 Professor VJ Duke October 30, 2014 at 22:04

        Really?

      • 136 Susan P October 30, 2014 at 23:04

        Really really.

      • 137 Professor VJ Duke October 31, 2014 at 18:45

        Are there gory scenes?

      • 138 Susan P November 1, 2014 at 00:02

        Massive gory scenes.

      • 139 Professor VJ Duke November 1, 2014 at 17:31

        Did you hide your eyes?

      • 140 Susan P November 1, 2014 at 20:11

        No, I did not. The battle was…interesting…in parts.

      • 141 Professor VJ Duke November 2, 2014 at 23:54

        All over probably!

      • 142 Susan P November 3, 2014 at 14:10

        My mouth is shut.

      • 143 Professor VJ Duke November 3, 2014 at 15:41

        I don’t see why…

      • 144 Susan P November 3, 2014 at 18:35

        Because if it isn’t shut, it might catch flies.

      • 145 Professor VJ Duke November 3, 2014 at 21:11

        Fruit flies, I bet.

      • 146 Susan P November 3, 2014 at 21:21

        Those are almost impossible to get shut of.

      • 147 Professor VJ Duke November 4, 2014 at 14:16

        They taste of lemon.

      • 148 Susan P November 4, 2014 at 20:48

        I wouldn’t know. I just remember the experiment that we did in homeschool, and boy were they multiplying in a blink.

      • 149 Professor VJ Duke November 5, 2014 at 13:44

        How yucketh gross. I bet Harry liked it.

      • 150 Susan P November 5, 2014 at 14:58

        Um….not so much. I wasn’t fond, either, of the little critters.

      • 151 Professor VJ Duke November 5, 2014 at 21:11

        Yeah…I bet not.


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Punchy Argot:

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