Which Castle?

So, the professor has been thinking about buying a castle–for extra protection.

I have my professorish eye on two that are currently on the market.

This is the first:

castillo-de-la-mota-castle-spain

Price: $1,051,679

Accommodations: 16 bedrooms, no bathrooms.

No running water, air conditioning, or heating.

There’s a huge hole in the south wall, but there’s a lobby.

Or…

awesome-hd-desktop-wallpaper-of-medieval-castle

Price: $2,555,777

Accommodations: 24 bedrooms, 1 bathroom.

There is running water (all around the castle), however it’s under the control of “the castle down the river.” Activities such as swimming, surfing, boating, drinking, and anything that would use the water outside, is strictly prohibited unless permission is obtained from “the castle down the river.”

Not much of a wall; bridge that leads to the castle needs repaired.

There is a pool table.

So, PF! Which castle should the professor choose?

Some PL’ers have weighed in…

Amelia: Get the first one, P.VJ. It’s more cosy.

Mr. Ratherquite: Don’t go with either, I say. A waste of time and money. But more importantly: time.

LottieOllie: That’s cute. Getting a castle won’t save you, V. (I didn’t really ask her.)

Schwarz Tauptinker: Do it, oh yeah! Get me the second, chickit!

Which castle?

I don’t know, truly.

Help!

Advertisements

235 Responses to “Which Castle?”


  1. 1 erinkenobi2893 January 27, 2015 at 19:21

    I’d get the first and work on renovating it. Better than having to deal with being surrounded by water which you can’t use.

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke January 28, 2015 at 01:54

      Unless, of course, I attack the castle downstream with Palpatine.

      • 3 erinkenobi2893 January 28, 2015 at 03:13

        That’s not neighborly, Professor.

      • 4 Professor VJ Duke January 28, 2015 at 14:32

        I know… *grumbles about fairness*

      • 5 erinkenobi2893 January 28, 2015 at 15:10

        Have fun storming the castle. :P

      • 6 Professor VJ Duke January 28, 2015 at 23:47

        I suppose that means you’re not going to help.

      • 7 erinkenobi2893 January 29, 2015 at 02:39

        Nope. :-P I don’t think it’s a good idea.

      • 8 Professor VJ Duke January 29, 2015 at 21:35

        Oh rats and a heifer, young lady!

      • 9 erinkenobi2893 January 30, 2015 at 02:50

        Sorry, I think today I’m a young hooligan. :-P

      • 10 Professor VJ Duke January 30, 2015 at 21:20

        *laughing* I like that too much to argue with it.

      • 11 erinkenobi2893 January 31, 2015 at 13:01

        Ha ha, quoth I! :-P

  2. 12 Heartafire January 27, 2015 at 18:49

    I would definitely go for the 24 brms and 1 bath…wht more could one ask?

    • 13 Professor VJ Duke January 28, 2015 at 01:54

      That’s true. But isn’t it too few bathrooms?

      • 14 Heartafire January 28, 2015 at 02:33

        I imagine there would need to be some renovations…of course I would take the bedroom that has the bathroom, the others can fend for themselves. “=)

      • 15 Professor VJ Duke January 28, 2015 at 14:31

        What about the professor?

      • 16 Heartafire January 28, 2015 at 14:35

        I suppose a schedule could be arranged….

      • 17 Professor VJ Duke January 28, 2015 at 14:45

        I do fear I’ll only get the room once a week now…

  3. 18 Catherine January 17, 2015 at 21:31

    I say the second one. It has a bathroom, after all, and if you make friends with the owner of the “castle down the river” then all your problems are solved!

    • 19 Professor VJ Duke January 18, 2015 at 02:12

      Okay, then. Will you help me invade him if he’s mean?

      • 20 Catherine January 20, 2015 at 03:37

        Of course! …once I master pull-ups.

      • 21 Professor VJ Duke January 20, 2015 at 13:06

        *laughs* Have you tried another?

      • 22 Catherine January 22, 2015 at 02:22

        *avoids eye contact* Well…um…no. Not really. Not yet.

      • 23 Professor VJ Duke January 23, 2015 at 02:34

        *laughing lots and lots* I do understand why not!

      • 24 Catherine February 3, 2015 at 03:05

        I think maybe in March I’ll pick it up again. That gives me a nice, long break.

      • 25 Professor VJ Duke February 3, 2015 at 19:20

        But…but…but…!

      • 26 Catherine February 6, 2015 at 04:17

        *looks disapprovingly at the professor* I’ve done more pull-ups than you, haven’t I?

      • 27 Professor VJ Duke February 7, 2015 at 04:06

        Well…how many have you done?

      • 28 Catherine February 9, 2015 at 03:27

        Um. Ten? Over three weeks? *looks sheepish* So maybe you’ve done more.

      • 29 Professor VJ Duke February 9, 2015 at 22:36

        That’s great for just starting! Keep at it, and you’ll be a pro in no time.

      • 30 Catherine February 12, 2015 at 02:42

        Thanks, I certainly hope so!

      • 31 Professor VJ Duke February 12, 2015 at 21:18

        *nods*

  4. 32 Felicia January 16, 2015 at 19:28

    The first one, definitely!

    • 33 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 02:15

      Aha! But…what about the lack of water?

      • 34 Felicia January 17, 2015 at 22:50

        With the money you saved buying the first one, you can use it to purchase a well to be made or other cutting edge technology

      • 35 Professor VJ Duke January 18, 2015 at 02:16

        Nice! Like…well, what sort of cutting edge technology?

      • 36 Felicia January 18, 2015 at 05:47

        Air conditioning, toilets, fixing the hole in the wall…

      • 37 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2015 at 03:45

        *laughs* But I’ll need to hire Hercules to do all that! Do you know his number?

      • 38 Felicia January 20, 2015 at 19:57

        Sadly, I don’t :'(

      • 39 Professor VJ Duke January 20, 2015 at 21:23

        Oh rats and a heifer. We’ll have to find it!!!

  5. 40 janeybgood January 16, 2015 at 17:56

    Not trying to brag or anything, but I’m, like, a total expert on medieval castles (the best kind of castle). Does either castle have a murder hole? Portcullis? Okay, I’m getting way too excited here *uses inhaler*

    • 41 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 02:13

      I didn’t know that! Well…Janey! Which one should I choose? You know, the professor is not sure at all what a murder hole is, but I’m thinking I want one, for sure.

  6. 42 crimeworm January 16, 2015 at 04:34

    Go with the second Prof, and I’ll visit you as I’m pretty sure it’s in Skye which isn’t far…but when I beat you at pool, please don’t throw me off the top or pour burning oil on me or shoot me out your cannon. It’s not cool. The first looks Welsh, although correct me if I’m wrong, that’s also a v cool place. But then I wouldn’t be able to pop by for Lapsang Souchong and custard creams. So for me, it’s two.

    • 43 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 01:58

      Hey Crimeworm!!!! Great to see you, for sure.

      I’m probably the worst pool player in the world, but…girls can’t play pool, can they? *skeptical brow* Burning oil is a great idea for villains who come by the castle. I must needs get some.

      It is a cool place! I’m not sure where it is.

      Goodness me. What’s a Lapsang Souchong? Sounds Chinese.

      • 44 crimeworm January 18, 2015 at 06:06

        It’s a cup of tea, Prof. *sigh* You’re such a philistine! Ok we’ll just have Tetley. And pink wafer biscuits. Yum.

      • 45 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2015 at 03:46

        I might just like that… *ponders* Philistines were warriors…

        Tetley? I fear I don’t know what that is either.

  7. 46 John W. Howell January 15, 2015 at 23:25

    I would hate to have a castle down the river telling me what to do. I say the first and convert some bedrooms into bathrooms and fix the hole. If you don’t buy the second you’ll have a million extra for the work.

    • 47 Professor VJ Duke January 16, 2015 at 02:42

      That’s a very good point. But, John, do you suppose it’s possible (since I’m upstream of the castle down the river) to send certain things down the river, and pollute the water somehow?

      • 48 John W. Howell January 16, 2015 at 13:50

        Would be like messing in your own nest

      • 49 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 02:04

        That’s true, but I thought I could hire you to make it clean again.

  8. 50 Simply Skeptical January 15, 2015 at 23:07

    Wow! Just how big are your pockets anyway Prof! Well, definitely go with the one with the bathroom how else could one live without one? I shudder at the thought. :-)

    • 51 Professor VJ Duke January 16, 2015 at 02:42

      Haven’t you ever camped out, SS?

  9. 52 Louis from VA January 15, 2015 at 22:57

    :D Are these the only two choices? I would go with second one… since at least it has ONE bathroom, and looks quite magnificent in the photo. Maybe later on you can negotiate a deal for the lake, or raise an army to conquer the other castle and gain control of the water. The bridge would be easy to defend… does the other castle have a good navy?

    • 53 Professor VJ Duke January 16, 2015 at 02:41

      You know, Louis, I don’t think that first castle has a navy at all. I’m leaning towards the second as well. Plus, like you said, we can take that castle down the river. Hey! Would you like to join the army? You can be the gen.

      • 54 Louis from VA January 20, 2015 at 23:33

        Yay! I just hope they don’t have a big navy, or we’re in trouble. :D

      • 55 Professor VJ Duke January 21, 2015 at 14:11

        Good point. *thinks* We’ll just have to get some sort of whale on our side.

      • 56 Louis from VA January 25, 2015 at 20:02

        A whale? Oh my…
        Sounds like a plan though. :D

      • 57 Professor VJ Duke January 26, 2015 at 18:58

        A plan of sorts.

  10. 58 masgautsen January 15, 2015 at 19:03

    Get the second one! The location is super. And we all know that location is important when you’re getting property!

    • 59 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 19:06

      Aha! You know where it is? Do you suppose someone could attack from the mountains, though?

      • 60 masgautsen January 16, 2015 at 06:22

        Sadly I don’t know where it is, but it sure looks nice there. If no one knows where it is and that the Professor owns it I think you will be safe from attac.

      • 61 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 02:03

        That’s such a good point. Very good point. I won’t have to defend as much. But I still might. The leopards might attack.

      • 62 masgautsen January 17, 2015 at 07:45

        One never knows. If your not attacked by anyone you might fall down the stairs.

      • 63 Professor VJ Duke January 18, 2015 at 01:56

        *laughs* And break my neck! I’ll get an elevator!

      • 64 masgautsen January 18, 2015 at 04:45

        You seem to think of everything, so I’m sure you’ll be just fine if you buy a castle or not :)

      • 65 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2015 at 03:41

        Well, you know, once I didn’t think about the troll under a bridge I bought. He ended up being a nuisance.

      • 66 masgautsen January 19, 2015 at 20:20

        well you can’t win them all ;)

      • 67 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2015 at 21:32

        Oh Rats and a Heifer.

  11. 68 Fatina96 January 15, 2015 at 18:54

    pfff hahhahhahahaa!!! They both look pretty bad if your planning on living their with actual people dear professor! however, if your alone and plan on being there with your professorish self and the dogs , then i guess the second one ought to do great.
    the first however will make things rather awkward for you :p

    • 69 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 19:05

      Now, whyever would the first be awkward? Because it’s sandy?

      You mean I couldn’t live in the second one with anyone? I mean…it’s big enough, you must admit!

      • 70 Fatina96 January 15, 2015 at 19:12

        Dude!!! Bathrooms!! the limited bathrooms… the way you can’t actually set up an electrical system there in such isolation… you call yourself a professor, but your actually behaving like one now!
        *laughing harder than i should*

      • 71 Professor VJ Duke January 16, 2015 at 02:30

        Young lady! This professor is a professor, dadblameit!

        Hmm…you do have a point. But how important is a bathroom if you have the outside available? And it’s fairly nice climate wise.

      • 72 Fatina96 January 16, 2015 at 18:21

        pfffshhh!!! That would be disgusting!!! :o

      • 73 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 02:14

        I know…but isn’t it worth it for a castle?

      • 74 Fatina96 January 17, 2015 at 03:11

        i don’t know about you pal, but if your asking for my advice, its a big no-no.

      • 75 Professor VJ Duke January 18, 2015 at 01:51

        Oh, dadblameit! I need your blessing first. Well, should I search for a house, then?

      • 76 Fatina96 January 18, 2015 at 19:24

        hahaha woahh! am i that important? *surprised*
        you better.. thats a better idea anyway…

      • 77 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2015 at 03:53

        Well, yes! Now that you know too much about me… *growls about that*

        A house? Okay. *sighs* I was really hoping for a castle.

      • 78 Fatina96 January 20, 2015 at 12:30

        aww hahaha.
        well, a castle was a great idea as long as there was an option of bathrooms and a proper electricity system… but since thats not an option, a big home will do just fine!

      • 79 Professor VJ Duke January 20, 2015 at 13:10

        *hangs head* Okay…though you could fix up the castle for me, if you want.

      • 80 Fatina96 January 21, 2015 at 23:49

        I am not an architect, but I could hire one… if you’d like?

      • 81 Professor VJ Duke January 23, 2015 at 02:19

        Perfect! What’s his name?

      • 82 Fatina96 January 23, 2015 at 11:24

        Dave :p

      • 83 Professor VJ Duke January 26, 2015 at 18:19

        He sounds great. Let’s get this going.

      • 84 Fatina96 January 28, 2015 at 10:46

        lol alright! :D

      • 85 Professor VJ Duke January 28, 2015 at 14:37

        Tell him I want plenty of battle rooms.

      • 86 Fatina96 January 29, 2015 at 11:33

        -_- dude, why isnt one enough?

      • 87 Professor VJ Duke January 29, 2015 at 21:42

        *laughing lots* Well…um…uhh…aren’t you going to want to practice?

      • 88 Fatina96 January 31, 2015 at 05:54

        Isn’t one room enough for practicing?

      • 89 Professor VJ Duke February 1, 2015 at 19:44

        I suppose so…but…but…well, I guess. Rats!

      • 90 Fatina96 February 2, 2015 at 11:20

        sheesh! didn’t anyone teach you that greed is a curse dear professor?

      • 91 Professor VJ Duke February 2, 2015 at 22:38

        Oh, you’re right. Hey, how come you’re always right?

      • 92 Fatina96 February 3, 2015 at 09:54

        hmm, a bad habit i guess :p *smirks*

      • 93 Professor VJ Duke February 3, 2015 at 19:26

        *grumbles about fairness*

      • 94 Fatina96 February 4, 2015 at 03:56

        lol chill dude. i’m wrong many times too, i was just teasing you :p

      • 95 Professor VJ Duke February 4, 2015 at 21:24

        Are you absolutely positively sure?

      • 96 Fatina96 February 5, 2015 at 06:11

        about the fact that i’m wrong many times? well, i hate to admit that but yes.. im often wrong.

      • 97 Professor VJ Duke February 6, 2015 at 00:36

        Me too. Let’s be wrong together, huh?

      • 98 Fatina96 February 6, 2015 at 09:34

        naaah, i’m planning on changing that so :p your on your own professor!

      • 99 Professor VJ Duke February 7, 2015 at 04:12

        Oh rats and a few heifers! *feels betrayed*

      • 100 Fatina96 February 7, 2015 at 05:37

        i was born evil! *evil laughter with thunder claps*

      • 101 Professor VJ Duke February 7, 2015 at 23:40

        *laughing lots* Now that was cool. I was born professorish.

      • 102 Fatina96 February 9, 2015 at 10:55

        woahh! you wear specs?

      • 103 Professor VJ Duke February 9, 2015 at 22:44

        Well…sunglasses! Why?

      • 104 Fatina96 February 10, 2015 at 12:42

        just like that :p

      • 105 Professor VJ Duke February 10, 2015 at 21:45

        Just like what? I was actually in LA, just recently, you know.

  12. 106 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 15, 2015 at 14:56

    So suddenly DS’s hut isn’t good enough? I thought it looked the coziest, well, if the My Magi’s cave isn’t an option.

    The view of castle number two speaks to me, of course, and if it were me I’d buy that one and flirt with the owner of the castle down the way. Seems easy enough. I’m slightly annoyed that you chose to ask Amelia. What does she know… However, a lobby and a need to build a bathroom would keep one busy. Plus, I think you’d look fantastic viewing the kingdom from on top of the castle. I know you can defend yourself, you know.

    • 107 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 18:58

      I never lived in his hut. *scared at the notion* And Mr. Magi’s cave isn’t…professorish enough!

      *laughs about Amelia* You don’t like her, do you? Such hate for this poor girl!

      Where wuth I? Oh yes. The view is fantastic, I agree. But I can’t flirt with the owner, now can I?

      • 108 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 15, 2015 at 21:05

        You could buy a similar hut, but one with more sunlight and with an airy feel to it. A cave isn’t professorish enough because you need…what?

        It isn’t that I don’t like your girlfriend, Duke. I just don’t think she has your best interest at heart. Something tells me she’d spend all your money building bathrooms. I don’t hate her. But I think you want me to.

        If it were up to me, you would most definitely flirt with the owner, if that meant swimming and drinking water. Why do you think you can’t flirt?

      • 109 Professor VJ Duke January 16, 2015 at 02:40

        Well, in a cave I wouldn’t have room to have a decent sword fight, right? What do you dislike about the castle? Too big? You could be right.

        She’s not the professors girlfriend! We just know each other. Like…like…like…I know Hector’s wife! She would be so bad as a wife. *groans*

        Boys can’t flirt!

      • 110 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 16, 2015 at 05:27

        Yes, very true. A cave is more for reading, I suppose. What do I dislike about which castle? They’re both fine. You should be happy with either one.

        Ahh, of course. Hector’s wife… *looks at her watch* *rolls her eyes* Amelia would be a bad wife because she isn’t nice to you. Maybe she would be sweeter once you moved into your new castle and spent more time with you and your friends.

        Oh yes they can. Trust me. This I know, Duke.

      • 111 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 02:03

        Hmm…I hope you’re right. Which would you pick, though?

        I’m beginning to think you like Amelia, you know. We all know she’s wicked. So very bad.

        Well, I can’t.

      • 112 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 17, 2015 at 03:55

        I would choose the second one, but you didn’t really leave me much choice. I mean you had me with the view. Looks peaceful there, I think. And the fact that there would have to be dinners with the neighbors in order to have water sounds nice. I like having people over. A bad bridge seems romantic. The silly jokes about a faulty bridge would make me laugh and trying to cross it would always be an adventure. Mostly, it offers a lot of quiet time, which I think is key. However, the first castle looks like it is full of stories. You could tell stories from your chair in the lobby. Seems like I’d find that appealing, as well. An old crumbly wall speaks of history. Maybe it could be a winter retreat. Overall, the second one is best. Seems you’ll have plenty of guests visiting.

        No, I don’t like her because she’s mean to you. She is wicked. I don’t want her anywhere near you. Let Schwarz have her.

        Ahh, but you can and you do!

      • 113 Professor VJ Duke January 18, 2015 at 01:53

        So…now maybe I should get the second one? You know…I’m thinking. Perhaps I should just buy a mountain instead? Then I could live in the mountain. With a dragon. And, of course, he’d have gold coins, jewels, and professorish hoods.

        Schwarz probably hates her.

        Me? *laughs* That’ll be the day.

      • 114 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 19, 2015 at 04:26

        Yes, get the second one. I truly love it the best. I’d be very jealous if you purchased a mountain, you know. It all sounds perfect. *wonders if I still have a dragon of my very own* I want a mountain.

        Is there anyone who likes Amelia, Duketh?

        Stop…you know you can flirt. You wouldn’t make me blush unless you were flirting.

      • 115 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2015 at 21:20

        Well, now I’m thinking I should get a mountain. I bet you do have a dragon. How come you doubt it?

        I’m not sure. Poor thing. Maybe the river?

        I must be unaware of it, then…

      • 116 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 20, 2015 at 01:41

        Oh, you know you’ll get the castle in the water, you have to, I bet. Dragons are important and I was just checking.

        Wow. That bad, huh?

        Yes, that must be it.

      • 117 Professor VJ Duke January 20, 2015 at 13:01

        Dragons are. Plus, one has to keep an eye on them.

        Well, I don’t know her close friends, so I can’t be sure.

        *nods* Of course. Women make this sort of thing up and blame men, dadblameit.

      • 118 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 20, 2015 at 16:34

        Dargons are spirited..one cannot get too close.

        Ahh, well, maybe the time will come for you to be introduced.

        *blinks* Guilty.

      • 119 Professor VJ Duke January 20, 2015 at 21:19

        For fear of the fire, I know.

        Soon maybe. Then I’ll have to kill.

        Yes! I knew it.

      • 120 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 20, 2015 at 22:54

        The fire is the easy part.

        You’re so wicked. Seems extreme, though.

        *walks back to her place* *attemps bad poetry*

      • 121 Professor VJ Duke January 21, 2015 at 14:10

        Really? I would think that’s the hard part.

        The professor is an extreme sort of beast, see.

        Audith isn’t capable.

      • 122 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 21, 2015 at 21:37

        Do you suppose? Hard doesn’t bother me.

        Yes, I guess you are, huh? Just be careful.

        Of anything.

      • 123 Professor VJ Duke January 21, 2015 at 21:52

        That would scare me! You’re brave.

        I will try to be careful. But I’m such a warrior…

        Of bad poetry.

      • 124 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 22, 2015 at 04:06

        Not as brave as I should be, you see.

        Then be a warrior that defeats and basks in the glory or be the warrior that makes me laugh, either way, you’ll be great.

        Until now.

      • 125 Professor VJ Duke January 23, 2015 at 02:42

        Well, we all could be braver. But on the scale, you’re near the top.

        I like the second option better!!!

        Nope. Never.

      • 126 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 23, 2015 at 05:33

        And you, Sir, are very kind.

        I was hoping you would, you know!

        You. Shouldn’t. Always. Be. Nice. You know.

      • 127 Professor VJ Duke January 26, 2015 at 18:14

        Na!

        It’s way better, to be honest.

        Just always being honest–unlike what you think!

      • 128 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 27, 2015 at 00:20

        Sorry! But…’tisn’t my fault, I don’t think.

      • 129 Professor VJ Duke January 28, 2015 at 01:50

        Tis!!!

      • 130 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 28, 2015 at 04:49

        Oh, no, Sir, tis not!

      • 131 Professor VJ Duke January 28, 2015 at 14:35

        Mr. Warrior says it is.

      • 132 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 28, 2015 at 21:17

        I think it’s pretty great that you think he’ll always agree with you. And that you think he must be super smart to know so much.

      • 133 Professor VJ Duke January 29, 2015 at 00:04

        Oh…well, yes. I do think these things. *laughs*

      • 134 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister January 29, 2015 at 01:48

        Smiles.

  13. 135 Debbie January 15, 2015 at 14:49

    Professor, I’m with ^Susan^ — you need to think this over carefully. Either one is a LOT of money, yet you’re not really getting that much. You can only sleep in one bedroom at a time, you know, and if you have friends over, they’re going to need more than one bathroom.

    No way I’d choose #2. That being under the thumb of “the castle down the river” sends shivers down my spine! #1’s lack of heating, cooling, and running water — plus the hole in the wall — are definite problems, too.

    If you don’t want to let Susan lead us on a castle-finding mission, perhaps you can go back to the drawing board?! Why, I’ll bet any one of us could design you a spiffy domicile!!

    • 136 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 18:57

      Oh rats. You do have a great point, I must admit, Debbie. But…but…you know how that is when your mind gets set on something? Right now, I’m liking the second one lots and lots. Don’t you suppose we could update it? Look at the water for Punchy Murdoch’s sake!

      Yes, the whole in the wall bothers me badly. Do you suppose the Goths will get in through there?

      Well, how about you and Susan help out, then? I’m lost.

      • 137 Debbie January 15, 2015 at 20:05

        I’m leaning toward something like this (http://www.premierpropertiesireland.com/index.php/2013/07/glanmore-castle/#more-412) though I don’t know if it’s still available. Golly, your hounds would LOVE that — and I’ll bet you’d have lots of visitors. I’m looking for an “excuse” to get back to Ireland, you know!!

      • 138 Professor VJ Duke January 16, 2015 at 02:37

        That is truly mighty. I love it.

        Wait. You used to live in Ireland?

      • 139 Debbie January 16, 2015 at 15:20

        Sorry, nope. Just visited (and not nearly long enough!)

      • 140 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 02:05

        Was it very green?

  14. 141 L. Marie January 15, 2015 at 14:34

    Usually when I’m asked about number 1 or 2, I think of going to the bathroom. So how ironic that these castles are sorely lacking in the bedrooms to bathrooms ratio. I agree with Walt. Take number 1 and add bathrooms. At least you won’t have to get permission to do what you want to do. But if you buy the castle, don’t invite LottieOllie, unless you’re thinking of an ambush.

    • 142 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 18:54

      But what if I could get the rights to the water? Would #2 be worth it? (It looks as if FEF knows the owner!)

      • 143 L. Marie January 16, 2015 at 15:18

        Well, number 2 at least has a bathroom, unless they consider all that water around to be “the bathroom.” Then it wouldn’t be worth it.

      • 144 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 02:05

        Well…but, Linda! It’s a castle! You must admit, that’d be worth it. You’d be in a dadblame castle!

  15. 145 Susan P January 15, 2015 at 14:29

    I think you need to take a woman along to check them out before you put your money where your mouth is. Or maybe more than one. I’ll volunteer to organize everyone.

    • 146 Susan P January 15, 2015 at 14:33

      Like this: http://www.bing.com/images/search?q=photo+palacio+de+sintra&id=DE323712F89FD65ECE2229087CD2C590FB0EDDA4&FORM=IQFRBA#view=detail&id=1267127651DA83D878396E113E445CCBCAC0AAE5&selectedIndex=7

      • 147 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 18:53

        Nice! Where’s that at? I’m getting castled out!

      • 148 Susan P January 15, 2015 at 19:20

        Portugal.

      • 149 Professor VJ Duke January 16, 2015 at 02:33

        Beautiful. Can I buy that one?

      • 150 Susan P January 16, 2015 at 22:03

        They might rent it. It is, you know, owned by the Portugal.

      • 151 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 02:18

        Well, let’s invade and take it!

      • 152 Susan P January 17, 2015 at 13:33

        But what if Mr. Magi catches us?

      • 153 Professor VJ Duke January 18, 2015 at 01:59

        You’ll have to explain to him…that Harry made us do it.

      • 154 Susan P January 29, 2015 at 14:42

        I’m sure Harry would love that…

      • 155 Professor VJ Duke January 29, 2015 at 21:52

        He’d only mind for a fortnight.

      • 156 Susan P January 29, 2015 at 23:43

        that is a small price to pay

      • 157 Professor VJ Duke January 30, 2015 at 21:17

        Well, then!

      • 158 Susan P January 31, 2015 at 00:17

        So, then, is he on board?

      • 159 Professor VJ Duke February 1, 2015 at 19:38

        I’d say so, yes.

      • 160 Susan P February 1, 2015 at 21:31

        We might have to wait until April 15.

      • 161 Professor VJ Duke February 2, 2015 at 22:36

        What happens then?

      • 162 Susan P February 2, 2015 at 23:49

        He will be done with taxes.

      • 163 Professor VJ Duke February 3, 2015 at 19:15

        Tis right: it’s tax season.

      • 164 Susan P February 3, 2015 at 22:08

        And it is a taxing season.

      • 165 Professor VJ Duke February 4, 2015 at 21:13

        Even for the deer.

      • 166 Susan P February 4, 2015 at 22:45

        That is so true!

      • 167 Professor VJ Duke February 6, 2015 at 00:29

        And their white tales!

      • 168 Susan P February 7, 2015 at 00:09

        Tell me about them!

      • 169 Professor VJ Duke February 7, 2015 at 04:28

        Riveting.

      • 170 Susan P February 7, 2015 at 12:50

        You should invite them to tell their story in the PL.

      • 171 Professor VJ Duke February 7, 2015 at 23:42

        The deer? They probably wouldn’t.

      • 172 Susan P February 8, 2015 at 00:10

        Maybe they just need some encouragement.

      • 173 Professor VJ Duke February 9, 2015 at 01:17

        They’re jerky.

      • 174 Susan P February 9, 2015 at 14:44

        That seems a bit harsh.

      • 175 Professor VJ Duke February 9, 2015 at 22:53

        Well…

      • 176 Susan P February 9, 2015 at 23:38

        My mother used to say that seven wells makes a river.

      • 177 Professor VJ Duke February 10, 2015 at 21:33

        That’s a good point.

      • 178 Susan P February 10, 2015 at 21:51

        No, it makes a river.

    • 179 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 18:53

      Perfect. We’ll take Harry along as well. I don’t like scheduling all that stuff anyway. (But…which one do you suppose you like the most? You must have a favorite…)

      • 180 Susan P January 15, 2015 at 19:19

        Of course Harry will come. He’s an accountant, you know.

      • 181 Professor VJ Duke January 16, 2015 at 02:33

        Yeah, all that stuff boggles my mind. Is he amazing with numbers?

      • 182 Susan P January 16, 2015 at 22:02

        He’s beyond amazing with numbers. People he has worked for – well, they are boggled.

      • 183 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 02:18

        That is so cool. It’s a gift, for sure.

  16. 184 FictionFan January 15, 2015 at 14:14

    Number 2!!!!! It just so happens that ‘the castle down the river’ is under the control of ‘the monster under the Loch’ who just happens to be a personal friend of mine, so you’ll have no problem with the neighbours…under certain conditions…

    1) Bring Schwarzy!!!
    2) Don’t bring Amelia, Spitz! *spits*
    3) Pay a monthly tribute of 1 lorry-load of chocolate – Belgian, not American.
    4) Bring Schwarzy!!!
    5) Bring your guitar and clarinet.
    6) Hold a great ball to mark your arrival.
    7) Bring Schwarzy!!!

    You won’t need knights, because as owner of the castle you will automatically become Laird of the Clan McDuke. with a howling Highland horde at your command. And should Lottie try to sneak in, the McFan Clan will rush to your support, peashooters blazing!

    Should all of these advantages still not have persuaded you, I should tell you that BUS will provide weekly supplies of cherry cake…

    • 185 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 18:52

      That’s Scotland?! Wow… *admires it lots and lots* Okay, then. That makes up my mind–even without all those extra goodies…but I’ll take them! (Does Nessie swim by that castle too? I mean, can she get there?)

      Bring Schwarz. Done.
      Of course not! Wouldn’t dream of it. (Unless you want me to bring her so you can kill her.)
      To who should the shipment be sent?
      Definitely bring a few instruments. Must need film there! Wonder if we could.
      A ball? I’ll let you schedule that.

      *laughing* Sounds good! I mean, wow! I get my own army! That’s tops. What colors do they have?

      *mouth drops* Weekly? *packs bags*

      Have you visited there, FEF?

      • 186 FictionFan January 16, 2015 at 01:23

        That, my dear forgetful Professor, is Eilean Donan Castle – the very one that I selected for you back when we decided you needed a castle in Scotland. In fact, I think I may even once have posted that very picture… so I’m very glad you like it! Nessie uses a system of underground channels to move all round Scotland – she’s very advanced for a dinosaur. So she’s been waiting ages for you to arrive… And yes, I have visited it and it’s just as gorgeous as it looks.

        Yay! Schwarzy in Scotland – be still my heart!!!
        Ooh, tempting! And it would be good to give Nessie a bit of variation in her diet…
        Duh! Let me think…
        That would be fantastic! You’d have to play something Scottish though…
        Yay! I shall start working on the invitations – hmm! Rafa, Darby, George…

        As Chieftain, you’ll have to wear a kilt, of course – but we’ll get them made in the Punchy colours, just for you…

        Weekly! She’s started baking, so hurry up! (Or else I’ll have to eat it all myself… *thoughtful face*)

      • 187 Professor VJ Duke January 16, 2015 at 02:46

        No way! *laughing lots* Wow, I’m so embarrassing. But, changing the subject, it’s super duper cool that you visited. Imagine having that in your country! So…umm…not sure how to ask this…are there more bathrooms than one? Maybe I was lied to.

        Why’s Nessie been waiting for the professor?

        *laughs* Rafa and George betrayed you. And Darby died.

        A kilt? Do…they wear anything under their kilts?

        Now you don’t want me to come! Well…you can have most of it.

      • 188 FictionFan January 16, 2015 at 17:16

        Sometimes I don’t know why I bother! *huffy, flouncy face*

        *sadly contemplates how her life has led her to be having online discussions regarding… ahem… bathroom arrangements* Well, you see, I don’t think you realise – when you’re the owner of a medieval castle and a great leader of men, bathrooms are unnecessary – you will have people to deal with that kind of thing for you… http://www.historic-uk.com/HistoryUK/HistoryofBritain/Groom-of-the-Stool/ . A perfect job for MM, wouldn’t you say?

        She’s heard how gorgeous you are and wants to see if it’s true…

        Go on – rub it in! So brutal! Can I help it if I’m a failure? *sobs brokenly but then brightens up* Oh, well, I’ll just have to dance with you all evening…

        Good noodles! How would I know? What kind of a girl do you take me for?!? *flounces off*

        Awww! OK, deal!

      • 189 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 02:07

        Because I’m so sweet! You’re like a potato, FEF.

        Ewwwwww! I wouldn’t make someone do that! Goodness. Europeans were such barbarians! Bet that wasn’t done in America!

        It’s a lie. I’m like Medusa.

        Yes! Of course you will! Otherwise the professor would get jealous! I’m glad they’ve betrayed you.

        Oooo….you do know…’cause you flounced off.

      • 190 FictionFan January 17, 2015 at 16:56

        I reluctantly admit that might be true. *doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry – then remembers The Martian and howls* A potato?!?! A POTATO?!?!? Would you like to explain, dear Prof – and it better be good!

        No, that’s true – Americans are so unsophisticated!

        *nods* Yes…it’s because you keep the worms in your hat…

        Awwww!!! See, now I’m glad they betrayed me too! You’re so sweet, you know, you know – not many men would be willing to dance with… a POTATO!!!

        *dignified and disdainful look* It’s not my fault if the wind blows high and the wind blows low…

      • 191 Professor VJ Duke January 18, 2015 at 02:05

        Well…umm… *blushes* No, because potatoes are good! Seriously, not a Martian connection there. Potatoes…umm…like… Okay, you’re walking through a field…and you find a potato! It’s a treasure. That’s what I was thinking.

        I’ve given up all my worms. Too pink.

        *laughs* You got me there. But you’re only a potato in certain ways! Like a potato, not actually one.

        Hahaha! You should look away!

      • 192 FictionFan January 18, 2015 at 16:15

        Hmm…I’m not convinced. I think you think I’m all knobbly and misshapen. Or else you want to slice me up and deep-fry me… *shocked face*

        Poor worms! What will they do with no hat to live in?

        Oh, that’s so much better – thanks! A lot! *flounces off (which isn’t so easy, you know…for a POTATO!!!)*

        But I do!!!

      • 193 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2015 at 03:49

        Okay, I’ll tell you: I was reading this book…and this fellow told a girl that she was like a potato. He meant in the best of ways. He’s just incredibly awkward. And she couldn’t stop laughing. So, I wanted to see what you might do…

        Tuppence invited them to your house.

        Hmm… *not convinced*

      • 194 FictionFan January 19, 2015 at 16:29

        You do read the strangest books! Well… did my reaction live up to your expectations?!?

        Yeuch!! You must come hunt them then!

        You have completely the wrong impression of me, you know, you know…

      • 195 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2015 at 21:29

        You sure did! I couldn’t stop laughing for some time there…

        Okay, but just because I feel bad.

        I know! I’m just messing with you, I fear.

      • 196 FictionFan January 20, 2015 at 02:13

        Glad to amuse you, sir!! *flounces off, huffily*

        Thank you! You’re so brave… *worshipful expression*

        Huh! This may be the first time I have to flounce twice in one comment…

      • 197 Professor VJ Duke January 20, 2015 at 13:04

        *rampages just for sport*

        You act as if you’ve never picked up a worm.

        That means I can rampage twice!

      • 198 FictionFan January 20, 2015 at 16:35

        *chuckles*

        Er…em…well…I never have! They’re so squiggly! Yeuch!

        That means I can chuckle twice!

      • 199 Professor VJ Duke January 20, 2015 at 21:19

        You’re not suppose to chuckle when I rampage! That’s like me laughing when you flounce.

        *unbelieving eyes* Everyone–I mean everyone–has picked up a worm before.

      • 200 FictionFan January 21, 2015 at 03:03

        But you do laugh when I flounce! Anyway, I was only chuckling to disguise my fear…

        Uh-uh! Not me! I’ve never been a horrid little boy…

      • 201 Professor VJ Duke January 21, 2015 at 14:16

        That’s true. Well, as long as you were disguising your fear, it’s alright, I think.

        Horrid little boy! *laughing lots* I’m still one of those.

      • 202 FictionFan January 21, 2015 at 17:42

        A Professorial rampage is a truly terrifying sight…

        I know you are, dear C-W-W! And please don’t ever change… *chuckles wickedly*

      • 203 Professor VJ Duke January 21, 2015 at 21:43

        Hmm…I’m almost convinced. Almost!

        *smiles bigly* I shall try not to, madam.

  17. 204 InfiniteZip January 15, 2015 at 14:05

    Buy both, but neither have snow for sledding…that is sad, but horses can swim so either would do well.

    • 205 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 18:49

      That’s true. But the second, I bet, gets snow in the mountains in the winter! Would the horses like them both equally?

      • 206 InfiniteZip January 16, 2015 at 10:20

        The horses love the castles, they want to live in them, especially the one with the hole in the wall, then they would come and go.

      • 207 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 02:04

        But…what if they bring ticks in?

      • 208 InfiniteZip January 17, 2015 at 13:59

        No, the hounds do that, the horses just bring roundish brown fertilizer to make the flowers smile😊🌺

      • 209 Professor VJ Duke January 18, 2015 at 02:00

        Ooo…we can’t let them do that!

      • 210 InfiniteZip January 18, 2015 at 13:06

        No, would get a bit smelly I think.

      • 211 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2015 at 03:47

        Yes, I think so too… *gags*

  18. 212 walt walker January 15, 2015 at 14:02

    Well, it sounds like the neighbors of number two are going to be troublesome, so number one I say. The millions you are saving can be put towards a nice bathroom. As for the pool table, you can always attack castle number two after you get settled in.

    Another option would be to build your own. Mr. Hercules said he would gladly do it for you if you provide a piece of defensible ground.

    • 213 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 18:48

      *laughs lots and lots* Walt, what do you suppose a bathroom would look like if one used millions to make it? *imagines the most shiny toilet ever* I like the idea of attacking the other castle as well. We could use your Goths for that, you know.

      Dick! Haven’t heard from him in a while. Let’s see…is he as strong as Hercules?

      • 214 walt walker January 15, 2015 at 19:31

        Yes, with that kind of cash you could afford to staff a full time restroom attendant. You know, a uniformed fellow who keeps the counters dry, hands, you towels, and offers you mints when you leave.

        Of course he is. You saw his picture.

      • 215 Professor VJ Duke January 16, 2015 at 02:35

        Wow. But…I mean, that does sound nice, thank you…but, that would be awkward, I think, to have an attendant in there all the time. I do wonder how much one would cost, though. *thinks on it for a few*

        *nods* We need to hire him for the castle staff, then.

  19. 216 sonmi upon the Cloud January 15, 2015 at 13:19

    Number one. Without doubt, it has an air of grandeur that suits you methinks. You can always get your own pool table afterwards and I’m sure some of the Punchy Folks would help you with any outstanding repairs. Also…it’s AWESOME.

    – sonmi expecting an invite for tea and sticky buns at some point – upon the Cloud

    • 217 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 18:47

      That’s true! But…Sonmi…what about the lack of bathrooms? Would that be a problem?

      *invite arrives in the mail for Sonmi, but you have to bring muffins*

      • 218 sonmi upon the Cloud January 15, 2015 at 19:02

        We eternals don’t poo.

        *goes to speak to the Muffin Man*

        – sonmi upon the Cloud.

      • 219 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 19:05

        Of course I knew this… *but he didn’t*

  20. 220 PorterGirl January 15, 2015 at 13:13

    Oh me oh my, what a choice to make! I am a bit concerned about the lack of bathrooms, however – where is a lady supposed to do a weewee? The one bathroom in the second castle would get stinky very quickly. I see some nice looking green bushes by the first one, I could use one of them. But anyway. The second castle looks brilliant on its island and I wouldn’t even bother fixing the bridge – that way people couldn’t bother me. But I don’t like this business of being under the thumb of this ominous-sounding ‘castle down the river’. No, sir-ee. I say, first castle and wee in the bushes!

    • 221 Susan P January 15, 2015 at 14:34

      No loo?

      • 222 PorterGirl January 15, 2015 at 14:47

        So many bedrooms, so few places to wee! I cannot believe it.

      • 223 Susan P January 15, 2015 at 15:18

        I would definitely have to find a different position. With all of the crazy and stressful moments in your life, I don’t know how you manage.

      • 224 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 18:54

        I know. What a wonder. Oh well.

    • 225 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 18:46

      *laughing lots* I suppose it wouldn’t work using a window to…umm…wee?

      Yes, I do wonder who owns “the castle down the river”. Maybe Mark Twain? Sounds like something he’d do.

  21. 226 Ann Koplow January 15, 2015 at 13:10

    Get the second one, Professor. If you do, I shall visit.

    • 227 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2015 at 18:45

      But there’s only one bathroom! Is that okay?

      (Just for the analysts, what do you not like about the top one?)

      • 228 Ann Koplow January 15, 2015 at 19:54

        I don’t speak to analysts.

      • 229 Professor VJ Duke January 16, 2015 at 02:36

        Not even the professor’s?

      • 230 Ann Koplow January 16, 2015 at 02:39

        Which castle are they in?

      • 231 Professor VJ Duke January 16, 2015 at 02:53

        The first one.

      • 232 Ann Koplow January 16, 2015 at 02:59

        Figures.

      • 233 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2015 at 01:56

        But you should trust the professorish ones. They have popsicles.

      • 234 Ann Koplow January 17, 2015 at 14:59

        I don’t care, unless they share.

      • 235 Professor VJ Duke January 18, 2015 at 02:00

        I think they’re black. Licorice.


Say something...anything...O Punchy Family!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s




TPL Schedule

Sunday: OFF — Day of Shalt Nots

Monday: TPL Story

Tuesday: OFF — Because I'm Gone

Wednesday: Professor Speaks

Thursday: OFF — Because Yes

Friday: OFF — All Day Sleep Does

Saturday: OFF — Blue-Footed Boobies Need Fed

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email!

Join 1,874 other followers

Follow The Punchy Lands! on WordPress.com

Blog Stats

  • 115,063 hits

Join the Professor on Twitter!

Professorish Smiley:

==[:-{)=

or

==[:-{)+

Depends on the day, see.

Punchy Argot:

1. Dadblameit.
2. Humdinger
3. Chickit
4. Chicky-woot-woot
5. Malediction
6. Rapscallion
7. Gardoobled
8. Congratulilolations
9. Togoggin
10. Gargonic
11. Two and Five Gurgles
12. Rats and a Heifer
13. Two nods, a wink, and an astroid
14. A bit, bits, and little bits
15. Huff-Hum and a Roar
16. So many thanks, I can't begin to thank you
17. Ri-do-diculous


%d bloggers like this: