So, this professor was writing.
On this board.
With a marker.
I think it was a black marker, but I can’t remember for sure.
That’s what happens when you get old and dull.
Anyway, while I was writing this young girl came in. She was wearing something, and she had hair. I could only give her one glance, see, since I was writing.
“What are you writing?” she asked.
“I’m not sure,” I replied. The marker made a funny noise there.
She laughed slightly. “How can’t you know?”
“Well,” I answered, “while one is writing one can’t read. Have you ever thought about that? I think it’s ground-breaking.”
That stalled her for a moment.
“Yeah… Umm…but I always know what I’m writing.”
“Always?”
“Always.”
“Well,” this professor said, “you’re either special, or…have you ever written on a board?”
“No,” she admitted freely, “I haven’t.”
“You should try it sometime. But two things: Not my board, and be ready not to read while you write.”
She left.
What a professorish board! I wish I had one.
What would you write on it?
Probably important diagrams. And then I would erase them–top secret information, you know.
Oh, by the way… Lucy and I have been considering world domination, and we think you would be an excellent choice for Secretary of Defense. What do you think, Professor?
That sounds tops! Could I also be a general of sorts?
Yes indeed! :-D The highest general. ;-)
I’m in!
:-D yes! We will take over the world!
Why were you writing on the board? When you were finished writing did you read what you wrote?
Well, it’s for a class. I’m something of the writer. I did, yes! I scanned the whole thing. It’s a huge board, isn’t it?
Yes it is!
Ridiculous!
It’s very Professorish. :-)
I must agree with the girl. I know what I’m writing too, well most of the times (because my handwriting isn’t very good) *laughs*
I hope it wasn’t a permanent marker!
*laughs* If I’m writing fastly fast my handwriting is total rubbish!
It was!
*laughs* I know what you mean! I tend not to understand what I wrote when I check on my notes later.
Oh noes! How can you remove a permanent mark from a whiteboard?
That’s so vexing!
I’m not even sure. Maybe acid?
Vexingly vexing!
Oh dear. The acid might remove the mark and the board! *laughs*
Professor do the ladies (not Ratherquite’s) just follow you around? It wouldn’t surprise me you know.
With all that writing the fingers must have survived the cold woods guitar playing. This was after I would assume.
Well she left rather abruptly. She must not have understood your professorish ways.
And why wouldn’t is surprise you, SS? *skeptical professors eye*
It was a bit after, yes. I think they survived. They’re not complaining anymore, at least.
Most people don’t. Isn’t that a pity?
Yes a pity indeed cause you’re simply special. NOW don’t go getting a big head. (giggles)
My head hasn’t been big since I was hit on the head by Ajax.
A surprise she left. You seemed very cogent to me. I never know what I’m writing either.
Thank you, John! Love this comment!!! I wasn’t rude at all. Quite right. I was just being nice. So you don’t either? It just writes…right?
Well eventually it comes together.
Eventually, yes. I’d say you’re right.
Are you studying to be a priest, Duketh? I agree with you, my dear. One cannot read and write at the same time. One can, however, witness each letter and make the sound it is intended for while writing. There is a difference. We do it all the time when sounding out a word we are writing. I think, anyway. I suppose you should get that young lady’s phone number. She may need a tutor. Oh wait. You don’t have a phone.
Nah…I was just writing for a study, actually. Yes! So glad you understand what I mean. (I think you’re the only one who does! *fist thingy*) Why should I get her phone number?
Oh. Makes sense, but it seems a bit detailed, I think. Intense. (For the best. *offers her fist* ) Because she needs a tutor?
It was detailed. But that’s what was going on in the class, if that makes even more sense. She needs one? Could you do it?
Quite a class, I say. Wow. Was your head spinning? Or were you teaching it? You want me to tutor the woman with hair and seems confused? Okay…sure. This ought to go well. *smiles* Will she fit in my classroom chairs?
Well, I’m sorta the helper. I run the audio and help the teacher. He’s a great guy. My head does spin occasionally! It’s a great class. On Rev. as I’m sure you can tell. It’s amazing.
Well…I bet she was…17?
The Helper, is that your title. Do you have a badge? There’s audio? Seems unlikely, Duke. Mine would be on permanent spin, I bet. I know a little, but I bet you know more.
Ahh, so you should get her phone number!
Well, we just have to run mics and all that. And since I’m something of an audio technician (in training) there…it’s my job, I fear. Oh, I bet you know way more than you give yourself credit for!
But why?
I bet you enjoy all that running around and making everything work. A good job to have and in the end you learn twice as much. Ooo, I don’t know. I’m pretty horrible about retaining factual information. I’m simple. Remember?
Well, she could be fun!
I do! It’s lots of fun. I look important, but I’m really not. That’s the fun of it. Very professorish. You, simple? Haha, I don’t think so, madam.
Girls are trouble!
I’m quite sure you’re fun to watch. I wouldn’t be able to pay attention.
I am too simple. And yes, girls are trouble.
You’re not too simple neither either!
I think, I’m not certain you mind, you might have written a revelation of some sort. Maybe it was about Amelia?
Have you been seeing Amelia again?
Who? Me? Would I do that?
I think you want me to marry her, don’t you?
Now. I just, you , well, *scribbles on the white board*
What did you scribble?
*smiles* This is on the basis of need to know.
Yes, I need to know. *taps foot*
Nice shoes. New?
Somewhat. They’re the red ones.
You should wear them more often. They give you a certain – don’t know what…
Coolness?
Yes. and awesomness.
Which makes me spicy.
Spicy as a dill pickle
Hmmm. Well you could always look at the color of the marker after the fact. There could be more than one color.
Oh, and I think the girl is correct. Of course you know what you are writing on a board, or you wouldn’t be writing it.
*laughs* A very good point! Of course I probably maybe did think about that!!!
But can you understand it at the same time? See, I’m not sure.
I know you are not. No further argument from me, dear Professor! :)
*laughing* Oh rats!
Your description of this young lady is quite detailed: she was wearing something and she had hair. Clearly you had your eye on her and not the board! No wonder you do not know what it is you write!
Well…I mean, don’t most girls have hair? See, she was nagging me. What do you make of her? Honestly now!
I believe she is talented, Professor. She can read and write simultaneously like some sort of trick pony. Dear, dear though… We must work on your charm for occasions like this. You can be quite confrontational in mixed company…
Oh, was I mean? Well…what should I do then? Please tell this professor.
Oh my. A girl…. Was she cute?
Well…umm…yes? A bit maybe? How can you tell?
It’s one of those things you just can tell.
But of course the professor can’t. I hold my ears to such things, you see.
He needs to learn to listen with his heart
Oh…but I’m heartless, remember.
Maybe…
Why maybe? *professorish eye*
Okay, I have several questions and observations (nothing new about that, huh?!)
First, was this a lesson you were about to give, or were you preparing music to accompany a sermon of some such?
Second, the girl was “young.” How young? She sounds wise beyond her years, if she’s able to stump the professor by reading and writing at the same time.
Third, “old and dull”? Seriously, Professor? Surely you realize the two don’t have to go together?! One can be old without being dull; likewise, one can be dull without being old!!
I wouldn’t have loaned her the board, either — you put in far too much work to have her draw kittens and unicorns all over it!!
Well, I was writing this for a lesson, but I wasn’t giving the lesson, if that makes sense. See, it’s sorta my task, since I’m the neatest writer there. *smiles proudly*
Well…she was early 20’s maybe? Is that old or young? I don’t know…
That’s a very good point, Debbie! The professor’s bad. It’s just they go together with me. I was young and dull once, see.
I agree! Do you suppose it will get erased, though?
Oh dear, it does make sense. *fist bump* The bestest writer there — how cool!
Early 20s is a big way away from what I was imagining. I was thinking maybe six or seven, ha! Somebody who’d be interested in kittens and unicorns, not somebody more interested in YOU (yep, they start young, don’t they??)
You young and dull? Now that I can’t imagine (nor could unicorn-girl, I’m guessing!). Don’t you just love it when we mess with you?!? HeeHee!
*fist bump* I am happy about it, I think. But I’m bragging now. Rats.
*laughs* Yeah…that’s my fault. I said a young girl, so you were picturing what my words said. In me? You don’t think so, do you, Debbie?
*laughing lots* Well, that’s ’cause everyone knows I’m heartless and can’t fall in love. I think that’s what it is.
I see some chemistry there… ;) :D
*gulps* No! what sort of chemistry?
Lol THAT kind of chemistry ! ;) :D
You mean, the kind with the periodic table and all that rot?
Naw I mean the more biological kind… :D
I don’t know about that. *holds ears*
Ah, I see the Professor has been practicing the “Be Rude to Girls” chapter in the FF Book of Professorial Behaviour!! Well done! I think you may have mastered its main lessons! *smiles proudly* Time now to move onto Chapter 3 – “Getting rid of Amelia”…
What awfully neat handwriting you have, sir! A pity you can’t read it – I’m sure you’d be impressed!
*sigh of relief* I was fearful for a minute you’d think I was flirting! Well…wasn’t she rude first? I was merely trying to concentrate. Why do girls always have speaks with you when you’re working?
Poor Anila…I mean, Amelia.
*laughing* Aw, thanks! Takes me 45 minutes to do that. *proud face*
It has been my experience that it is boys who want to talk to me when I am trying to write. What say ye?
Really? Nah…really? Harry does that?
Is he a boy?
Well, I don’t know…is he?
I thought the Professor was aware of all?
Oh no. Lots of things confuse me. Like for instance, girls.
Girls are inscrutable.
And inunderstandable.
And we like it that way.
But it’s not fair to us open books.
Who told you that life is fair?
Amelia!
Hah! She is sadly mistaken.
You should have speaks with her again.
You don’t want me to do that. Really, you don’t.
I was fearful for a moment but I could tell you found her deeply unattractive when you didn’t immediately start winking at her. Either that or your extraordinarily beautiful pants are at the cleaners leaving you powerless in the face of beauty…
Girls just can’t help themselves round you, I’m afraid – face it, sweetie pumpkin pie, you’re a babe-magnet!
I shall tell Mr Ferris how rude you’re being about poor Anila and he shall send the Lone Ranger after you…
You can handwrite all the invitations to the ball then…
*laughs* I only wink sometimes! Or give strange hand motions, if I see someone far off. You know, like one of those things. *does an example* I’m not sure what people make of it. The pants! No! I refuse to believe in their existence.
Me? No! *holds ears* I’m just the professor is all.
And the Red Indian? *laughing*
Am I invited?
You wave at girls in the street??? Incorrigible!! Do it again – I didn’t see it properly the first time… I fear the pants have taken on a life of their own! You shall never be free of them – they shall haunt you for eternity! (Bet Cassie would LOVE them!!!)
*laughs* You know it’s so!!
And the horse!
Depends…have you been practicing your dancing?
Well, not only women…anyone. But it’s usually in a building. Could be old men…I don’t specify, see. Whoever might get one. Well, it’s like this… *does it again* Cassie? I think she’d hate me. I would have had to…beat her a few times.
I do not neither! You’re…making things up!
Dancing? Nah…I’ve never danced. So how can I practice?
Oh dear! I think that might be worse! Ah I see it now! You mean, like this? *does it* I shall try it out on old men in my vicinity over the next few days… Oh, she’d dump Evan for you in a minute! She only went for Evan ‘cos he was the only one available. No competition, see?
Am not! You only have to look at a girl and she starts flirting! *stomps off in a jealous rage*
But… that’s like saying I can’t play air-guitar…
Yes! Just like that. It looks wonderful like that, I think. Well, do be careful! Might be an entirely different thing for a woman to do it. You stay safe! Tis an order. Well, I wouldn’t have shot her in the leg. And I don’t think I’d take order from her!
But that’s because…all girls do that!
*laughs* Do you play?
Three old men have responded so far – it’s going to be a busy weekend! I might try it on young men next week, just for the variety. *laughs lots* It is quite sad that he coudl only get a girlfriend by shooting her…
Yes…with you! *whispers* Babe-magnet!!
I’m not good enough yet – I just practice…
*laughs* What exactly will you do with them? Feed them that horrid dessert you throw about? It is. And she took to it! Imagine dating a guy that shot you!
*holds ears* All I heard is nothing much about nothing at all.
So do I. Grueling, isn’t it?
Good noodles, no! I’m a feminist – I won’t be feeding them! Instead they shall buy me chocolates and flowers and take me dancing! (That might only be the FF version of feminism, I admit…) I reckon even if the dancing’s a bit much for them at their age, one at least should survive long enough to drive me home…
*chuckles* So sweet!
It is! But at least air-guitars are easier to tune.
*laughs* I forgot! Sorry. See, I’d make them something. Then they’d never come back. Not that I’m bad at that sort of thing. You mean you’d want driven home after the dance? Oh dear. I think I’d make you walk! Of course, I’d be walking too.
Guitars are simple to tune!
You can cook?!? Awwww! You’re being so lovely today I’m quite worried! Walking me home from the dancing! Sooo romantic! *gazes dreamily at the moon*
For you, perhaps, but that’s just ‘cos they’re hoping you’ll play them…
Sure. I manage to do stuff. Grew up with a family that cooked like crazy, mind you. Do you see a witch passing in front of the moon? That means it’s the season of the witch, if you do.
That could be true. I wish they would have speaks with their owners, then!
I’m most impressed! Have you ever tried out any of Ruber’s recipes? Oh, does it? I thought it meant Amelia was on the prowl…
Aw, that’s awfully mean to your own guitars… *sobs for them*
Nah, I usually don’t use recipes…as a matter of fact, I can’t remember a time that I did.
They’re all hardy specimens, don’t worry.
She could see that you were writing on the board, but she didn’t understand what you were writing? Huh. Were you writing in coded language? Was she perhaps giving you the “come hither” eye, but was put off because you exposed her woeful lack of experience in whiteboard writing?
A good point! Maybe she was messing with me. Oh dear…what’s a come hither eye? *laughing* It’s a funny expression.
That come hither eye (or “look” as some say) is a flirtatious look, usually followed up by a comment like, “What are you writing?” A smile often is a next step. But perhaps she was too bold or too ignorant of the finer points of writing on a board.
Goodness me! I’m glad you make this professor aware of such things, Linda. You know, now that you mention it, I think she did smile. Look here, now I’m thinking she had no interest in the board at all! This is horrible. Just horrible.
I won’t stand for folk writing on my boards either. I keep them locked up. The markers too. Folk will take those, I’ve found. And one time they took my board. That was a bad day.
Folks will take markers. I was about the room the other day…and some chap left the caps off the markers. Can you believe that? I just hope that the board doesn’t get erased. Or I’ll have to rewrite it all. *very angry face*
Did you ever get your board back?
No. By the way, where did you get yours? It looks like one of those fancy models.
That’s real sad. Well, it’s in this building. I can’t say I own it necessarily. I just use it, if that makes sense.
A mysterious lady, I say! She sounds slightly more pleasent than Amelia. Such a shame that she left so soon, she may have learned something.
I like the look of the writing on the board – it mentions a feast which, as you well know, is a favourite thing of mine. Professor, you have made my hungry!
I think she just came to torture me. Do you know it takes me about 45 minutes to write that all on the board? I think my arm falls off at least twice during the process as well.
*laughing* Feats are always tops. I agree. But a real feast is outside, wouldn’t you say?
That’s quite good going for so many words, you know. A great shame about the arm, I hope you were able to pop them back on. Playing guitar with one arm might be a struggle.
Now that is an interesting point you make about feasts. I must say I had not thought of it before, but an outside feast would be a grand thing indeed. You know – I shall throw one this summertime. You must come along.
It would be a struggle. Glue puts it back on rather well.
I’d love to come! In the woods somewhere. Like the woodland folk would do, see. I think that might be neat. Have a big fire and such.
Ah, glue. Such a saviour of situations.
Oh there are woods by my house, that eould be easy enough. But we might need help to carry all the feast food – unless you can glue on an extra couple of arms. Terry can come too! Then we can sing around the fire. Marvellous!
We’ll invite a whole gang to do all the menial work! I’ll just sit around the campfire. Nick can build it for us. Of course Terry has to come! Would he run off, though?
*laughs* brilliant, I hate doing menial work. IO had better do the cooking, though. Nick would build us a magnificent fire, I am sure.
No, Terry would stay where the food is!
Yes, me too! You can if you’d like! And I’d sit about and give order. I’m good at that sort of thing.
*laughing* And protect us from the coyotes.
I like cooking and am quite good at it so I think I should prepare the feast. if people disobey your orders you should give them the Professorish eye *shivers*. I have not seen too many coyotes in the woods, but there was a vicious-looking hedgehog once. You should protect us from that!
Yes! The professorish eyes. *practices in the mirror and scares hisself* I know you’re a great cook! I’d help anywhere you’d want, actually. Hedgehogs are so frightening! Little beefy creatures. See, over here I hear coyotes all the time.
No, don’t do the eyes! *hides*
*Laughs* maybe we could get a team of cooks that we could boss around while we sit around the fire enjoying ourselves.
I have never heard a coyote, are they scary? I think I would like to hear them. I love your description of hedgehogs! They have their babies in my garden, the scamps.
*laughs victoriously about the eyes*
That sounds awesome to me. Coyotes sound like a pack of dogs yelling and screeching at each other. It’s said (about here) that they’ve bred with wolves, so they’re a little bigger than usual. I also saw a mountain lion in my driveway once! In your garden? They are scamps!
They sound rather interesting, I would like to record them! Not when they are breeding with wolves, though. What a noise that would be. A mountain lion! Goodness. I would worry that it might eat me as I look very succulent.
I’ve thought about trying. But they move so quick. *laughing* Imagine them breeding with the wolves! I’m sure that’s just a plain ruckus. I worried to! And the thing was screeching for a mate. *gulps*
Things near your house seem to like mating a lot. I suppose it is just nature! You should have pointed the lion in the direction of the coyotes – they don’t seem too fussy about who they mate with. You live in a very exciting place, I think!
*laughing lots and lots* I’m not sure if the coyotes would like that. But, hey, that would be cool to catch on tape. Mating? Yeah…well, I’m not sure why!
Poor coyotes. But it would make a great film. There must be something. .. reproductive about where you live!
*laughs* I refuse to believe that…imagine what that would mean if I did!
*laughs hugely* Imagine! In fact, I don’t think I should imagine it. But now I can’t help it!
Well, I’m not even sure what it means. *holds ears*
Who was she?? Duke, I agree with the girl. We must know what we are writing ;)
I’m not sure. What do you make of her, Nimmi? Yes, I suppose so…but how can I read and write at the same time?
I too not sure as well… I’m not telling you to read and right at the same time, darling ;) I’m just telling that, we must know, what we are writing :) Don’t you think so???
Yes…I suppose you’re right…but…but…it makes it all harder, you know! See, look here, could you read a book–say, a Twain book–while you were writing an excerpt on a board? I suppose you could, but surely you wouldn’t understand as much as if you were just reading it, right?
Now, darling, I’m bowing ;). Hat’s off ;) You are so right :)
*shocked face* You’re bowing, Nimmi?
Because you are awesome :) I have to Bow ;)
*mouth drops open* It’s not because I have a katana?
Haha :D No.. I’m really not scared of your Katana.. I know you won’t do any harm to me :)
Oh rats and a heifer! You’re right. I’m too…well…I can’t say sweet.
Hahaha :D You are cute and sweet too ;)
*holds ears*
:D <3 *I'm shouting*
Haven’t I gone deaf the sudden?
But you are a warrior right? ;)
Yes, it’s true, I am!
So my dear, warriors are strong, they won’t become deaf just by a sweet :P girls playful scream ;) What???
Well, that’s very true. After all, I’m used to the sounds of battle.
Yes, that’s what I mean ;)
All the clang and clatter!
Or rather, the codes and strings ;)
Codes?
Well… musical codes :)