Monday The Day

Punchy Family! (It’s been a bit too long since I’ve started with that greeting, I think.)

I would like to inform you that this professor will be introducing an orderly schedule to TPL—next week. Lots of interesting things on the way. At least, I hope so.

But for today, I get to do something that’s rather an interest! Dear friend, Nimmi, awarded the professor with this funny-looking award…


And now I have to answer questions about my creative process. So, here goes.

What am I working on at the moment?

That’s hard to say. I suppose the professor is practicing a lot. But then again, I’m working on finishing a glass of lemon juice, too.

How does my work differ from others in my genre?

Now the interest here is this: The professor isn’t at all sure what my writing genre is. Nick’s told me that it’s weird & quirky, and since I don’t like the sound of that—even though it’s probably true—the professor refuses to think on genre mostly. I just write, I fear. For better or for worse; in life and in death; in sickness and in health—and till I part.

Why do I write/create what I do?

Okay, I’ll break professorish secrecy code and tell you a bit of factual TPL history here.

TPL actually started as a story that this professor told orally. In truth, that’s true. So, it was born more for entertainment purposes than anything else.

How does my writing/creative process work?

Well, I’d like to same something important and very high and mighty, but I fear the professor’s process isn’t too special at all. I just sit and write. And write and sit. When I make myself do it. I usually don’t plan much at all.

For example—again I’m breaking professorish secrecy code here—the character Amelia (the favorite lady of many, I’m thinking)—was born out of just an idea.

One day, this professor thought to himself: What if someone painted their eyes so muchly much—and so thickly—with makeup that you couldn’t see their eye color? That was an interest, so I wrote about it. She was only supposed to be in one story, hence the ‘no last name’ curse. But she caught on. And she’s history. TPL history, that is.

So, that’s that.

Good day, gentlemen!


157 Responses to “Monday The Day”

  1. 1 Nancy Loderick April 1, 2015 at 19:07

    Hey Professor,

    Congratulations on your award! Well deserved.

    My, you certainly have a lot of secrets. What a mysterious person you are. ;)


    • 2 Professor VJ Duke April 2, 2015 at 12:48

      Oh, you know the professor is an open book!

      • 3 Nancy Loderick April 7, 2015 at 18:50

        Well Professor,

        That is a very appropriate description, since Professors are supposed to love books! :)


      • 4 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:16

        But I don’t!

      • 5 Nancy Loderick April 8, 2015 at 20:44

        Well Professor,

        You are a study in contrasts!


      • 6 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 12:08

        What a cool saying you have there! I’ll wear it proudly.

  2. 7 Nimmi March 31, 2015 at 12:54

    That’s so sweet of you dear Vj duke :) I’m so glad you accept this award and wish you many more like this.
    Keep Shining my dear <3

    • 8 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 22:03

      Thank you so much for giving it, Nimmi! So…did it give you a bit of an insight?

      • 9 Nimmi April 1, 2015 at 11:18

        Hmmm.. Well… Can see many secrets were disclosed ;)

      • 10 Professor VJ Duke April 1, 2015 at 18:28

        Oh yes. Aren’t I an open book?

      • 11 Nimmi April 2, 2015 at 11:18

        Hmmm…. An open book with some pages glued ;) Is it not :)

      • 12 Professor VJ Duke April 2, 2015 at 13:07

        *laughing* So, I hide things, then?

      • 13 Nimmi April 3, 2015 at 15:26

        *laughing too* You know well ;) Don’t you hide :P

      • 14 Professor VJ Duke April 4, 2015 at 22:27


      • 15 Nimmi April 5, 2015 at 11:17

        Hahah :D You know that, you can’t keep yourself hide from me for long ;)

      • 16 Professor VJ Duke April 6, 2015 at 20:45

        Oh yes I can!

      • 17 Nimmi April 7, 2015 at 16:35

        No you can’t my warrior!!

      • 18 Professor VJ Duke April 7, 2015 at 17:38

        Oh rats. You don’t play fair, Nimmi!

      • 19 Nimmi April 7, 2015 at 17:59

        And how can you say that :P

      • 20 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:14

        Just because, dadblameit!

      • 21 Nimmi April 8, 2015 at 18:31

        Really??? Dadblameit ;)

      • 22 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 12:05

        *laughing* You swear better than me!

      • 23 Nimmi April 9, 2015 at 12:06

        Hahahah :D Students come out to be much better then teachers, dear :P ;)

      • 24 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 12:15

        Do they? This is a vexing matter, I assure you.

      • 25 Nimmi April 9, 2015 at 12:18

        Yes, I think so. And it’s really not a matter to be sad about, Sir.. It’s the truth. If you have doubt then ask you teacher :) ;)

      • 26 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 20:06

        Well…who’s my teacher, Nimmi?

      • 27 Nimmi April 10, 2015 at 11:37

        Well… That you know better, VJ ;)

      • 28 Professor VJ Duke April 12, 2015 at 22:38

        I think a rabbit.

      • 29 Nimmi April 13, 2015 at 12:30

        What??? And how, my dear?? Please explain ;)

      • 30 Professor VJ Duke April 14, 2015 at 11:37

        Well, they teach you fun things.

      • 31 Nimmi April 14, 2015 at 12:05

        Yeah, that’s true :)

      • 32 Professor VJ Duke April 14, 2015 at 19:27


  3. 33 Me, Myself and DIY March 31, 2015 at 11:18

    Good info. Good award. Go on with your creative self. ;)

    • 34 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 12:03

      *bows* So many thanks, madam!

  4. 35 Madam_W March 30, 2015 at 19:28

    lol lovely to know more about your creative process : D Congrats on the award!

    • 36 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 20:06

      *laughing* Now you know everything about the professor, huh?

  5. 37 walt walker March 30, 2015 at 16:19

    No the Professor definitely does not fit into a genre. You are your own genre, sir. Kind of like Douglas Adams is his own genre. (I say so, anyway). This is a good thing. No matter what adjectives are put on it.

    Order?! Does that mean a full stop at all crossings, no walking against the light, no cutting to the front of the line to get the cheese for your salad?

    • 38 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 20:01

      *mouth drops* Mr. Walt, thank you so much for the compliment. (I feel bad I said you weren’t a gentleman the sudden. But you are, I think! If you want to be. It’s better not to be, though.)

      Yes, I’m afraid so. And if you break the rules…you don’t pass go, get the money, or marry Amelia.

      • 39 walt walker March 30, 2015 at 21:28

        You said I wasn’t a gentleman? *gasps* News of this has not yet reached me. Claims such as these are the things gentlemen are wont to duel over. I hope I need not prepare for one, sir. I do own a boomerang, you know.

      • 40 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 11:45

        Yes, that’s quite right. And this professor fears the boomerang, truly. Tell you what, it’s nice not being a gentleman…do you like it the sudden?

      • 41 walt walker April 1, 2015 at 00:30

        I do fancy myself a gentleman, now and again. What I mean by that is, I do fancy myself TO BE a gentleman. On occasion, at least. When the mood strikes. Often it doesn’t. Often I prefer to be engaged in battle, as you do. But sometimes, every once in a while, I do wish to lay my overcoat across the mud for a lady. And to retire to the drawing room for cigars and brandy afterwards. In the company of other gentleman. To engage in Gentlemanly Discussion concerning the Affiars of the Day and various other Matters of Interest.

      • 42 Professor VJ Duke April 1, 2015 at 18:22

        *mouth drops* Now, isn’t that the perfect picture of what a gentleman is? So, I thought I was a gentleman, but after reading that, I’ve decided I’m not. I’ve never experience that. You must bring me along next time.

        Across the mud? That’s very nice of you.

  6. 43 Angeline M March 30, 2015 at 15:45

    Congrats for sure, and thanks for what pass as revelations. TPL started as an oral story you say…to who were you speaking? (or is that whom?) That is my biggest question for the day. And about Amelia….I’ll send her more eye makeup as a prize (I almost wrote boobie prize but that wouldn’t sound right).

    • 44 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 20:00

      But aren’t they revelations? Dadblameit, you don’t think so! Well…that’s part of the secret, see. If you knew, you might…think…of things, see. *laughs* Send her some yellow makeup. If that sort of thingy exists.

  7. 45 desertdweller29 March 30, 2015 at 15:31

    I take issue with being called a “gentleman”, Sir! Where are the gentleladies? Imagine if you didn’t have Amelia? PL has a void of female characters, you know. How about one that can slice a bee in half with one swing of a sword?

    I do remember when you posted stories orally! I think I’ve been a proud PLander for years now. Tell Nick you make weird and quirky look good. (Not as good as your pants, however.)

    • 46 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 19:59

      *laughing lots* Well, I’m working on meeting some new girls just for you! You should be proud. (Amelia may be a real person…maybe.) Oh yes…I should have had ‘ladies’ in there, huh?

      You must be! Thank you for your, support, DD. We wouldn’t be the same without you. I will! (You still remember those?)

  8. 47 John W. Howell March 30, 2015 at 15:19

    The tour award looks great. I read with interest your answers to the questions and although you stated the secrecy code was broken I’m still in the dark. Also, I would be careful with the term gentlemen. Some have a hard time fitting into that classification. Well done.

    • 48 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 19:58

      Thank you, Mr. Howell. The professor appreciates it. That’s true. For instance, Walt’s not a gentleman. Neither is the professor, I fear.

      • 49 John W. Howell March 30, 2015 at 19:59

        Me either

      • 50 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 20:07

        *nods* Of course, I’d supposed this, you know. Much more fun this way, isn’t it?

  9. 51 sonmi upon the Cloud March 30, 2015 at 15:08

    “weird & quirky” – Welcome to my world. *winks and laughs*.


    • 52 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 19:57

      Sonmi! Have you caught a gopher today?

  10. 53 Debbie March 30, 2015 at 14:53

    I have a bone to pick with you, Professor. How dare you sign off, “Good day, gentlemen,” when soooo many of your readers are LADIES?? Hmm? (See how hard it is being a writer??!)

    As for your new order, well, I suppose that might work. It’s worth a shot anyway.

    Before I forget, Congrats on your award! Everybody enjoys peeking into a writer’s life and methods. Why, I can’t fathom. ‘Tis much more interesting to watch a musician do what he does than watch a writer write — that’s kind of like watching grass grow, I think!

    As for Amelia, humph! Since she’s merely a figment of your imagination, she can be erased at will. Though please don’t kill her off — she provides such a good target for venom-spewing, ha!!

    • 54 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 19:57

      Oh dear…look at that. You’re quite right. I forgot. *laughs* Umm…but it was your fault the sudden! Weren’t you supposed to remind me of that?

      You’re skeptical that it will work, dadblameit!

      *laughing* You do have a point. But you wouldn’t want to watch a musician practice. We should liken it to hearing an author read their completed work. Now that’d be cool! How’s yours coming, btw?

      She sure does! What if I said she’s based on a real character?

      • 55 Debbie March 31, 2015 at 00:44

        My fault?? How’d you drag me into this?? *skeptical stinkeye*

        I’d want to watch a musician practice, for sure! There’s something rather reassuring to know that expertise isn’t attained overnight *grins bigly* Sigh, ’tis a slow process, Professor. And I keep getting interrupted by paying work (not such a bad thing, you know!)

        A real character? For reals?? Hmm, that’s an interest. I do hope she’s not somebody so close to you that every time we all poke fun at her, you’re not cringing, okay (cos I wouldn’t want to hurt your feelings, even if you are a warrior and have no heart!!!)

      • 56 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 11:51

        *laughing* I’m trying to escape, see.

        I do know what you mean. The professor is the sort that practices and never gets better. It’s a curse, see. That is a good thing. Lots of designs?

        *laughing lots and lots* Well…she sorta is. Rip her all you want! It’s very cool.

  11. 57 LadyPinkRose March 30, 2015 at 14:15

    Have you finished your lemon juice yet? *mouth puckers at the mere thought* I’d say it’s about time you got orderly over here and began to get yourself together, Professor. You’ve left us hangin’ a tad bit, or at least according to my memory that is. Again I could be wrong, for LadyP has been a tad busy herself and perhaps has been missing out on the goings on over in PL. You ought to try some Brag’s Apple Cider Vinegar and baking soda in with that lemon juice. Yum. Good stuff. *hair curls on head* Have yourself a good day, Sir!! Love, LadyP

    • 58 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 19:54

      *puckers too* Umm…that’s too much tartness. Like the professor. Did you know I’m too much tartness? Plus, I sting.

      • 59 LadyPinkRose March 30, 2015 at 23:49

        First you don’t have a heart, now you are too much tart, and now you sting too? Really? I seriously doubt this. I believe you are delusional, though. No offense, Professor.

      • 60 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 11:49

        *laughing* Well, my katana stings for me. Isn’t that something?

  12. 61 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister March 30, 2015 at 14:08

    A lovely tour and many thanks to Nimmi for suggesting you do this tour. *smiles sweetly* However, next time begin finishing your lemon juice after you write your admissions, Duketh. Nimmi deserved a bit more explaination, probably. I mean, how confused to you prefer your followers? *wink*

    I enjoyed this very much. I think your genre is political humor. Don’t you? Even, lifestyles of the rich and famous would work. Amelia is lucky to be born, I’d say.

    • 62 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 19:50

      *laughing* But wasn’t that the most interesting thing you learned about me? It might have been a bit of a lie. See, I’m trying to live up to the reputation you gave me the sudden.

      Political humor! I like it. That means I must needs rip a political. Who should it be?

      • 63 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister March 30, 2015 at 21:35

        *smiles* Most interesting and the most disturbing, actually. I smelled the lie. *sniffs again* I didn’t give it to you…you earned it, Duketh.

        Yes! Makes complete sense to me. Rip on, Sir. Who? Ummm… *looks about* I haven’t a clue…

      • 64 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 11:45

        Oh, huff-hum to you, madam! If I’m a liar…then…dadblameit!

        Well…just name a politician. *laughing lots*

      • 65 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister March 31, 2015 at 14:00

        I do enjoy making you curse, Sir. You know I don’t really believe that….or I really do!

        You’d rip just any politician? For the sake of ripping? Wow… Do I know the name of any? I’m not sure…who’s our VP? *laughing*

      • 66 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 22:05

        *laughing* What a confounding statement, double-dadblameit!

        The VP! Aha…he needs it, for sure. *makes face*

      • 67 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 1, 2015 at 02:12

        Do you need help channeling your frusteration, Duke? I’m familiar with confounding statements. *laughing* You’re the king of those, Sir.

        Don’t rip him! You’ll end up in jail or at the bottom of the ocean. Wait…you like it there. Scratch that.

      • 68 Professor VJ Duke April 1, 2015 at 18:23

        *laughing* Oh, you got me. But I’m sweet!

        I can take it! Maybe the president!

      • 69 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 1, 2015 at 21:24

        You just told me you weren’t sweet back there… *looks behind herself* We’re spinning again.

        I think he gets enough ripping, don’t you?

      • 70 Professor VJ Duke April 2, 2015 at 12:58

        Well…a man has to look out to himself.

        Not NEAR enough!

      • 71 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 2, 2015 at 19:41

        I think you should seriously consider listening to your own advice. Just an FYI.


      • 72 Professor VJ Duke April 3, 2015 at 12:55


      • 73 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 3, 2015 at 13:46

        I think I need to borrow your katana. I feel as if I need to protect you for once.

      • 74 Professor VJ Duke April 4, 2015 at 22:26

        *steps behind Audith* Please do!

  13. 75 Susan P March 30, 2015 at 14:02

    I’m surprised you don’t have more badges of honor. And there was nothing in there about how you manage to disappear in the middle of a ruckus with impunity. I think that is important. Some of us might need to know that at some point. Those ninja departure are a bit unsettling. Then there is Nick. Where is he from? How does he just show up after no appearance for months and is fresh as a daisy? And PorterGirl has the PL patois that I am not certain you are not also her.

    *jumps on the swing and gives him a saucy look*

    • 76 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 19:49

      I don’t have the red badge of courage, you know. Yes….well, that’s a secret secret. We can’t let on how I cause a ruckus then run. That’d be cheating.

      I’m Lucy?! Well, I can’t be. See, she’s a lady, and I’m a wicked professor. Nick comes from a land far, far away where they cut off your hand if they don’t like your face. It’s barbaric, but, hey, it’s his home.

      • 77 Susan P March 30, 2015 at 20:43

        Hurumph. Excuses, excuses.

      • 78 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 11:43

        Don’t you just love them?

      • 79 Susan P March 31, 2015 at 12:59

        Only when I make them. How about you?

      • 80 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 22:04

        Same here. But you should love professorish ones. *pleading eyes*

      • 81 Susan P March 31, 2015 at 22:43


      • 82 Professor VJ Duke April 1, 2015 at 18:20

        Did I win yet?

      • 83 Susan P April 1, 2015 at 21:45

        Win what? Hmmmm!

      • 84 Professor VJ Duke April 2, 2015 at 13:02

        Oh rats and a heifer!

      • 85 Susan P April 2, 2015 at 13:10

        I don’t want any rats or heifers. What else do you have?

      • 86 Professor VJ Duke April 3, 2015 at 12:46

        How about a patriot helmet?

      • 87 Susan P April 3, 2015 at 23:49

        A new one?

      • 88 Professor VJ Duke April 4, 2015 at 22:38

        A small one.

      • 89 Susan P April 5, 2015 at 00:39

        Cool! I would like to see that!

      • 90 Professor VJ Duke April 6, 2015 at 20:32

        A picture?

      • 91 Susan P April 6, 2015 at 20:34

        But of course! Or even two.

  14. 92 FictionFan March 30, 2015 at 14:02

    I fainted at the first three words of the tags, and have no muffins! Whose favourite, exactly?!? Hah! As if I need to ask! Was your award for being a fickle flirt? If so, well deserved, sir! Well deserved indeed!! I expect she’ll have a last name once you’re married!!

    I wait with unconcealed anticipation (not to mention scepticism – which should always be spelled with a ‘c’, by the way) for the orderly schedule. It is not in any way my wish to be insulting but… HAHAHAHA!!!! The PL!! Orderly!! Good one!!

    • 93 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 19:48

      Yours, of course! You’re always going on about her. I think you like her–lots. *laughing* My award…was not for fickle flirt! And you taught me how to flirt anyway, though I don’t do it at all.

      *laughing lots and lots* Hey! TPL is very ordered and quite spicy. I mean…what’s not ordered about it?! *winks*

      • 94 Susan P March 30, 2015 at 20:45

        It’s pure chaos.

      • 95 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 11:44

        And you should help, madam!

      • 96 Susan P March 31, 2015 at 12:59

        What? To create more chaos?

      • 97 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 22:04

        Yes, please!

      • 98 Susan P March 31, 2015 at 22:44

        Wait…you are giving me permission to create chaos?

      • 99 Professor VJ Duke April 1, 2015 at 18:20

        I absolutely am, madam!

      • 100 Susan P April 1, 2015 at 21:49

        Is your life insurance in order?

      • 101 Professor VJ Duke April 2, 2015 at 13:03

        Probably stolen, I fear.

      • 102 Susan P April 2, 2015 at 13:12

        Was it your ex-girlfriend who stole it?

      • 103 Professor VJ Duke April 3, 2015 at 12:46

        *nods* Now what do I do?

      • 104 Susan P April 3, 2015 at 23:48

        Prosecute? I mean…

      • 105 Professor VJ Duke April 4, 2015 at 22:37

        Or murder!

      • 106 Susan P April 5, 2015 at 00:42

        The question is if you can do it and get away with it. What say ye?

      • 107 Professor VJ Duke April 6, 2015 at 20:40

        You could!

      • 108 Susan P April 7, 2015 at 16:10

        Just exactly does that mean, Sir?

      • 109 Professor VJ Duke April 7, 2015 at 17:38

        How much do you charge for doing the dirty work?

      • 110 Susan P April 7, 2015 at 18:00

        Ah. Well, I charge 30-40 dollars an hour.

      • 111 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:15

        How about 5?

      • 112 Susan P April 8, 2015 at 13:22

        Did you say 50 dollars. That sounds good.

      • 113 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 11:58

        Oh, rats and a heifer madam!

      • 114 Susan P April 9, 2015 at 16:31

        You keep changing your mind. What’s a girl to do?

      • 115 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 20:22

        Isn’t it best that way?

      • 116 Susan P April 9, 2015 at 23:00

        Well, it seems to me to be a girly kind of thing.

      • 117 Professor VJ Duke April 12, 2015 at 22:31

        That’s why I make quick decisions.

      • 118 Susan P April 12, 2015 at 23:16

        Because you are a girl? What? I’m confused.

      • 119 Professor VJ Duke April 14, 2015 at 11:28

        *holdes ears the sudden*

      • 120 Susan P April 14, 2015 at 12:54

        * pulls out the fog horn and gets ready*

      • 121 FictionFan March 31, 2015 at 01:00

        *gasps and growls… then chokes a bit but manages to keep looking cool* I wouldn’t have to go on about her if only you’d put down some snake traps! I would never have taught you to flirt if I’d only known what a fickle philanderer you’d become! And she is so not my favourite!! That honour belongs to my sweet Schwarzy, and you and Amelia can just go and… and… jump in the lake together! Hope her mascara’s waterproof!! *flounces off ‘cos she forgot to do it earlier*

        *gasps again…twice* Don’t you wink at me, sir!! I will not be winked at by the same eye that winks at that vile creature! The PL is as orderly as chaos theory *tries to catch a passing butterfly*

      • 122 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 11:55

        There’s no such thing as snake traps! You have to use a stick to stick a snake with. You know… Jump in a lake?! *laughing* Well…who’s your favorite female PL’er? You shouldn’t flounce the sudden…Schwarz is coming!

        *hands FEF a butterfly net with spikes in it* I didn’t wink at Amelia! Since…since…since that one time! But that doesn’t count, you know.

      • 123 FictionFan March 31, 2015 at 16:49

        Go on, then! Here, borrow my stick! You could wear one of those cool bathing costumes – I’m sure Amelia would be impressed! Is there one who doesn’t flirt with my Professor? If so, she’s my favourite!! Ooh, is he? Hurrah! I miss him terribly, you know, you know…

        *takes it and removes spikes – poor pretty butterfly!* Did too! You once winked at her three times!! Seared into my memory banks, that is, you wicked womaniser!

      • 124 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 22:08

        *mouth drops* You have a stick like that?! FEF! You be careful! I would not wear that bathing costume! You wear it! Amelia would probably laugh me to scorn. Sandra doesn’t…really… Yes…I”m working on stuff…

        She was singing wicked things, though. Rats. That was a good spike-net. And you broke it. But I quit doing it, right?!

      • 125 FictionFan April 1, 2015 at 16:15

        I do – so be careful! I will not wear it, sir!! Amelia can wear it – and why do you care if she laughs you to scorn anyway!? It’s fortunate for you I’ve now moved on to Handel’s Christams or I’d be furious!!! What do you mean ‘really’?!? I bet that means she does!! *smiles anticipatorily*

        Who? The butterfly or Amelia? You did… *muses* … yes, you did! That must have been because you fell in love with Chani…

      • 126 Professor VJ Duke April 1, 2015 at 18:40

        That’s true: I shouldn’t care about her laughing me to scorn. Good! We’re agreed. She gets to wear the horrid thing, then. I wonder if they’re interchangeable… *laughs* It is fortunate! (Do you like that one?) No, no, no…I just said that to make you spicy.

        Well…Amelia…that’s the better answer. I only felt bad for her! I’m heartless…so no girl can take my heart. And you have no proof that I’ve got a heart, see!

      • 127 FictionFan April 1, 2015 at 20:38

        *nods* Over her head! I think the ones girlies wore back then were even sillier looking. (Very much! I don’t like to pick favourites because I’ve enjoyed them all so much, but the one I have watched most often is Blessings – you should do more clarinetty stuff sometime…) Hmm… I’ll run out of blancmanges at this rate…

        Oh yes I do – see above! Blessings is the proof… *smiles triumphantly*

      • 128 Professor VJ Duke April 2, 2015 at 12:54

        Nothing could be more ridiculous than that…suit!!!! And I think I’m quite adamant about it. (*shocked* Really? Now that is an interest. And you don’t like Kenny? *wonders* Yes, yes. That’s what Nick’s been asking me. You wouldn’t believe how many people contact me wanting the sheet music for Blessings.)


      • 129 FictionFan April 2, 2015 at 16:15

        Well, google ‘female bathing costumes 1920s’ and see. (Why shocked? It’s beautiful! Kenny has no soul, whereas the Professor has – that’s the difference! Good noodles! Don’t tell me I’m agreeing with Nick again! This is getting to be a habit… but you should! I would believe it – I’d want it if I could play.)

        *laughs* I won!!

      • 130 Professor VJ Duke April 3, 2015 at 12:52

        They look as same as the guy’s! (But Kenny did a CD called Heart and Soul! *smiles bigly* And you think I have him beat. That’s huge. Him being a hero of sorts and call. Clarinet has better tone anyway.)

        *gives FEF a chocolate*

      • 131 FictionFan April 3, 2015 at 16:14

        Except the girls got to wear silly hats too! (Seriously, I do! And I don’t think it’s just because I’m biased, you know, you know… Did you say you also play oboe?)

        Thank you! (Further proof…)

      • 132 Professor VJ Duke April 4, 2015 at 22:31

        Hats are fun to wear! (Well, I did a bit, yes. And do. I also made the reeds! *proud face* They had to be 47mm long.)

        *growls* No! I lost it at Troy, the heart.

      • 133 FictionFan April 6, 2015 at 15:56

        I shall not allow you to wear a hat like that, no matter how much you wheedle!! (Then when you next have 20 mins to spare you can listen to one of my favouritest of all time pieces of music The beginning is almost too romantic, isn’t it? But not quite. I saw the wonderful Nicholas Daniel play it live a couple of years ago but couldn’t find one of him playing it on youtube. Why do they have to be 47mm long?)

        Sooo fluffy!!! *chuckles*

      • 134 Professor VJ Duke April 6, 2015 at 20:56

        I don’t want to wear one! You! (I’m listening to it right now. Beautiful. I love the oboe. And RWV is growing on me, I must say. Not too romantic at all! I’m not sure why it has to be that long. There’s all sorts of specifications. The reeds crack like crazy.)

      • 135 FictionFan April 7, 2015 at 15:35

        Phew! I was worried… (*smiles* It’s a lovely piece of music. What are they made of?)

      • 136 Professor VJ Duke April 7, 2015 at 17:36

        (It is. You’re so cool that you like stuff like that, see. Never worry about your coolness. They’re made of cane, which actually grows in France.)

      • 137 FictionFan April 7, 2015 at 21:59

        I was cool, back before I became a wrinkled old crone from a bygone era, it’s true…

      • 138 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:25

        You’ll be cool forever, you know.

  15. 139 L. Marie March 30, 2015 at 13:28

    Congrats on your award, Professor. Glad your ideas bore such fruit. And speaking of fruit, why lemon juice? Do you like the sourness?
    It’s interesting that you mentioned Amelia. Two and five gurgles, you like to live dangerously, don’t you? (Hence the lemon juice, I suppose.)

    • 140 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 19:45

      Actually, to be completely fair, more lemons (sliced) than juice. And I was having it with something else. So, I cheated a bit. But I do love the taste of a lemon!

      *laughing lots* I know she’s like your favorite!

  16. 141 PorterGirl March 30, 2015 at 13:09

    Firstly, please allow me to congratulate you on your award! And such a pretty looking thing it is too. This is most informative and interesting, especially to learn how the blasted Amelia came into being (actually, I think I know a lady or two who share her technique with eye make up. It must make the eyes so unweildy!) There should be a competition to decide her last name. Something frightful, I shouldn’t wonder.
    I am very excited for two reasons. Reason a) The professorish secrecy code has been breached! And with delightful results. Reason the second – exciting things are on the way! Now I can face Monday with a cheery whistle and a skip.

    • 142 rolerrol March 30, 2015 at 14:25

      Professor, that is a funny looking award!!! 😄

      Congratulations all the same! Instead of quirky and weird maybe unique and original would be better words to use.
      All I will say is, keep on writing the way you do….
      It’s a breath of fresh air!

      I have a question which I am sure a lot of people may also have,
      where is the picture that will show us who the Professor is….??
      It’s a vile thing to leave your readers to imagine who and what the professor looks like. Haha…..

      • 143 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 19:55

        Isn’t it, though?!

        Aw, thanks so much, my man! I do appreciate it. And I must say I like how you categorize me better than Nick! *shoves Nick off a building*

        Well…okay: Some say that’s the professor, but I doubt it.

      • 144 rolerrol March 31, 2015 at 04:30

        I didn’t know Nick was the Professor’s real name. I am afraid you spoke too soon about categorizing. 😉
        Shoving Nick off the building was not a good idea….!

      • 145 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 12:01

        *laughing* Oh, that’s not. He’s my right-hand man, see.

      • 146 rolerrol March 31, 2015 at 12:53

        Oh I see now!!

      • 147 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 22:03

        So sorry for confusing you, my man!

      • 148 rolerrol March 31, 2015 at 22:28

        It’s cool….😄

      • 149 Professor VJ Duke April 1, 2015 at 18:19


    • 150 Professor VJ Duke March 30, 2015 at 19:43

      *bows* Thank you! Isn’t it something? And she may be loosely based on a real person. *laughs* Maybe more than loosely. But don’t tell anyone. (No! *laughing* What a wonder that is!) How about Stewart?

      Yes…it was breached! But I’m still an enigma to the fishes, you know. They can’t understand why when I always swim, I nearly drown. Very exciting things! With you!

      • 151 PorterGirl March 31, 2015 at 05:21

        A real person! *shudders* lawks a-lordy! Stewart would do. It is not quite as dastardly as a name could be but it certainly works.
        You remain an enigma to us all, I suspect. But a delightful one. Like a Rubik cube. Exciting things! And I am so honoured to be a part of them. Although, I am not nearly exciting enough to do the things proper justice.

      • 152 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 12:02

        Amelia Stewart. *laughs* That’s ghastly! And you know it!!

        You absolutely are! I know this. Because the professor knows most things, see.

      • 153 PorterGirl March 31, 2015 at 12:12

        *laughs* ghastly is a brilliant word, one that is most apt for your dear Amelia.
        The Professor knows too many things, it seems *laughs bigly* You are both wise and wiley.

      • 154 Professor VJ Duke March 31, 2015 at 22:01

        She’s not mine, dadblameit! *gags and gives her to Lucy* More wiley than wise…you know…

      • 155 PorterGirl April 1, 2015 at 05:15

        *laughs* oh don’t give her to me, give her to Dick! Wiley is a type of dark wisdom, I feel.

      • 156 Professor VJ Duke April 1, 2015 at 18:26

        *nods* Dark wisdom…something very spicy about that!

      • 157 PorterGirl April 1, 2015 at 20:19


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Professorish Smiley:




Depends on the day, see.

Punchy Argot:

1. Dadblameit.
2. Humdinger
3. Chickit
4. Chicky-woot-woot
5. Malediction
6. Rapscallion
7. Gardoobled
8. Congratulilolations
9. Togoggin
10. Gargonic
11. Two and Five Gurgles
12. Rats and a Heifer
13. Two nods, a wink, and an astroid
14. A bit, bits, and little bits
15. Huff-Hum and a Roar
16. So many thanks, I can't begin to thank you
17. Ri-do-diculous


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