The Proposal

If you propose this, I’ll propose that. The difference between this and that is sublime, anyway.

***

austrian_castles_hohenwerfen1

Dr. Z’s castle.

Dr. Zauberer’s castle is in the woods of Austria. It’s a castle of black stone, mostly. (I actually saw a gray stone, you know, you know.)

Anyways and a few, this professor was there with Dr. Zauberer. We were having seats and speaks in the backroom. You see, there was a party going on in the main hall.

I should stop here and describe the main hall. (I fear this professor never describes things.)

Okay, so the main hall is big, very ornate, and has rugs. And paintings. And tables. And ladies in dresses and fellows in…well, I’m not sure what you call what they’re wearing.

The noise was seeping through the heavy wooden door that separated us from the party, and the dancing.

“I don’t know, Dr. Z,” this professor said. “For instance, I hear one should wait until he’s sixty, and then think twice.”

Dr. Zauberer looked at me as if I had three noses.

“Oh, you don’t understand true love,” he said, rising from his seat and pacing about in a distrustful manner.

“You do?” The professor was doubtful, see.

“Oh yes indeed, you bet, of course, why wouldn’t I?”

I think I made a professorish face at that one. “Wow…”

“How long have you known her?” I asked.

Dr. Zauberer began to count on his fingers. “One…two…two and a half…three…three and a quarter…five…yes, that’s it. For five months.”

The professor may have gulped. “That’s—”

“Rather long, I know,” Dr. Zauberer interrupted. “But that’s why I’m proposing. Tonight! At this very party. Grab my cane, would you?”

And with that, Dr. Zauberer swung open the doors and strode out into the party.

I followed—without the cane. I don’t take orders, see. I refuse and refute them. It’s called the Double-R thingy.

Dr. Zauberer stopped the music, then said in a loud voice: “Hey ho, everyone! I have an announcement. Gather about. Gather about!”

And everyone did.

Once everyone was gathered about, Dr. Zauberer seemed perplexed.

“Wherever is Lisabeth?” he asked. “Where?!”

Schwarz Tauptinker spoke up first. “You know, chickit, I think she’s doing the powder thing—you know?”

“Not at all!” Dr. Zauberer returned. “Not at all!” Then he began to tap his little black belt-buckled shoes on the ground. One after the other.

Then cries were heard: “Here she is, here she is!”

And Lisabeth was pushed through the crowd to where Dr. Zauberer was standing.

“Ahh!” Dr. Zauberer gasped. “You’re brilliant, my darling!”

Now…well, the professor should say a few words here with regards to Lisabeth. Description-wise and otherwise.

Lisabeth loves to dance, and her real first name is Elizrabeth. (It was shortened.) Her hair is very dark, and her eyes are very blue, and her face is very pale. She’s a very-type of girl, see.

Anyways and my ways, anyone with a few eyes could tell that while Dr. Zauberer stood there stuttering, trying to find the right words, adoration and pure happiness was gleaming from Lisabeth’s very blue eyes–or face?

A perfect match?

Maybe.

“Well…Lisabeth…” Dr. Zauberer was saying. “Well…now…hope you’re enjoying the party…”

There were a few murmurs from the crowd here.

“And…and…” Then he dropped suddenly on one knee and fell to the side haphazardly before righting himself. “That smarts the knee,” he commented.

Dr. Zauberer looked up into Lisabeth’s eyes, and Lisabeth looked down into his eyes. He grasped her hand.

“Lisabeth,” he said. “Will you be my wife?”

And Lisabeth started crying.

“Dadblameit,” I said. Now it was going to get mushy.

But it didn’t.

As Lisabeth cried happily—I presumed—and the crowd was doing all that ‘awww’ stuff, Dr. Zauberer went pale and fell backwards. Then jumped to his feet.

“Never mind!” he yelled to Lisabeth.

Lisabeth started and stopped crying in a hurry, I assure you.

“What?” she asked meekly.

“Well,” Dr. Zauberer said, “it’s obvious you’re upset. I take back my proposal. Don’t cry about it. Just next time say no and spare us all this!” He motioned with his arms. “Why cry? Crying is so silly. I wasn’t going to force you.”

Then he left, back into the room, slamming the door.

Lisabeth started to cry all over again.

This professor laughed—just a bit.

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126 Responses to “The Proposal”


  1. 1 Susan P April 15, 2015 at 12:51

    You would not like it. You really would not. It tickles.

  2. 2 Me, Myself and DIY April 9, 2015 at 10:47

    Hmmm, one of my favs in awhile. I think this happens more than we know. ;)

    • 3 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 12:14

      Thank you, MMD! I think you’re right. A bit sad, isn’t it?

  3. 4 Debbie April 8, 2015 at 14:51

    I love so much about this story, Professor (and I’m sorry I didn’t leave comments yesterday, but the weather was wicked and I didn’t want to fry my laptop!). First off, NO ONE should propose in a public setting and Dr. Z. should have known that! Then, poor Lisabeth, who probably had feelings for the good doc, breaks into tears (why does it seem that blue-eyed lasses are always teary-eyed??). And while I’ve never heard the saying — One should wait until he’s sixty and then think twice — well, there’s a LOT of wisdom there, you know!!

    • 5 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 12:03

      *laughing lots and lots* I do love your comments, Debbie! And this professor understands about the weather for sure. It’s a bit nasty here, too, but no storms yet.

      Very good point. Why did he have to go public with it? Imagine if she would’ve said no! What with a crowd like that around…bet it was intimidating! There is a lot of wisdom in that saying, I agree! We should trumpet it about, see.

  4. 6 Simply Skeptical April 7, 2015 at 22:36

    Dr. Z is a little thick on these issues. Poor Elizrabeth, no perhaps not. He’s a nut! Weird Prof. very weird….

    • 7 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:25

      *Laughs* I know, right? Imagine seeing this! It was disturbing.

  5. 8 walt walker April 7, 2015 at 20:42

    Well, I don’t know about all that. All I know is these two were clearly not meant to be together. If she’s going to cry and rend her tunic and beat her breast and he’s going to get all huffy about it. You were remarkably uninvolved in this party, Old Sport. What gives? Didn’t anyone offend you? Or you them?

    • 9 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:22

      Well…I was embarrassed by the whole proceedings, I must say. Then again, I did do the double-r thingy. And that tired me out, see. So, you think they should be together?

  6. 10 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 7, 2015 at 19:45

    The Double-R thingy isn’t a thing. You made that up, I think. Seems a lovely castle, professor. I find Dr. Z quite romantic and he seems smitten with Lisabeth, I like using her short name, as well. (*laughs so much*) Someone should fix this outcome…I think Lisabeth was crying out of joy. Blue eyes are nicer not crying. I feel terrible for Dr. Z. And you should have brought along his cane!! That’s what friends do….help! Gesh. *annoyed stink eye* Fix this problem, Duketh…

    This and that…proverb, is dadblamery.

    • 11 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:19

      But isn’t it something? I think Mr. Warrior would use the double-r thingy lots. I think I should.

      I know! I think they both like each other. How should I fix it all? Maybe hit Dr. Z with his cane on the head? That might fetch him overall.

      Is not!

      • 12 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 8, 2015 at 20:16

        Who would Mr. Warrior use that double-r thingy on? Me? Rude…you’re trying to get him grounded.

        I guessed they loved each other. I’m good at noticing that sort of thing. You know how to fix the problem. Hitting Dr. Z is NOT a good way to start…but he does deserve a pounding for not allowing her a minute to sort herself.

        Tis!

      • 13 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 12:07

        *laughing lots and lots* No! I wouldn’t do that. Hmm…he might use it…on the Principal, for instance. Or a teacher that he doesn’t like. I might try it, you know.

        Okay, Audith…what should I do? The professor is hopeless in these matters.

      • 14 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 9, 2015 at 14:00

        *laughs brightly* Yes you would… Now, if he uses it for such things you’d better tell me. I’ll put him in detention. You too for that matter. How rude.

        How would I know. I’m not good at fixing problems…tis your problem, Duketh.

      • 15 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 20:17

        Oh come on! It would be super fun. Work is the death of freedom, remember.

        You’re perfect at it!

      • 16 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 10, 2015 at 00:46

        You’ll have to bail him out of detention. I wouldn’t. ..nor you. You two could sit it out a bit. Work is dadblamery and so is having a fever. Talk about the death of freedom!

        I am? Since when?

      • 17 Professor VJ Duke April 12, 2015 at 22:34

        We’d escape confinement, I’m sure. Through the window, see. You’ve got a fever?! No!

        You’re always fixing professorish problems.

      • 18 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 13, 2015 at 02:59

        Do you expect me to harbor the two of you, as well? Negative. I might leave lunch sacks by the tree line, at most.
        Yes, I almost died from Thursday to Saturday afternoon. *pouts* I’m much better now. I even got a little special time with a bag of water and a needle because I forgot to drink enough water. I’m a terrible patient. Redheads are drama queens they said. Said my veins didn’t play fair. Whateves! Better now.

        Name one. See? No problems found.

      • 19 Professor VJ Duke April 14, 2015 at 11:30

        *shocked face* Oh come on! You know you want the adventure too. We’d be convicts. That’d be fun.

        Goodness! Audith! First, glad you’re much better (you didn’t even tell me!), and second, you should always drink water!! *professorish lecturing eye* *laughs*

        Oh, I can’t tell. But you do. Confidence maybe.

      • 20 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 14, 2015 at 13:55

        *looks at you eye to eye* Fine! Phooey, of course I do. But I don’t want to be a convict. I’m too sweet for jail.

        (I’m sorry. Should I have?) I forgot to drink. I was busy being sick and dying. It took up all my time. *pouts*

        Makes me happy to think so.

      • 21 Professor VJ Duke April 14, 2015 at 19:35

        *laughs* Well…okay. Just Mr. Warrior and me then.

        Nah! I just had no idea. I feel bad that you were that sick!

      • 22 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 14, 2015 at 20:52

        I’d rather you weren’t convicts, you know.

        I felt bad about it, too. *laughs* I need a babysitter for myself sometimes, I think.

      • 23 Professor VJ Duke April 15, 2015 at 11:27

        Well, then we wouldn’t be as cool.

        You sure do! I’ll have to make sure you’re drinking water from now on!

      • 24 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 15, 2015 at 14:02

        Ahh, I see. So street creds require a bit of sketchy activity.

        I drink it! Promise. I just forgot.

      • 25 Professor VJ Duke April 15, 2015 at 17:11

        That’s right. Makes us like gangsters.

        How could one forget? I’m always carrying about a 32 ounce container of water. My analysts tell me that I drink too much water.

      • 26 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 15, 2015 at 22:33

        Gangsters with hubba bubba…one carrying a guitar case and the other with a tuba on his back.

        I forgot because my body only wanted sleep and my mind was frying due to fever. I couldn’t think straight. I carry a similar container tis aqua in color. Your analysts keep a close eye on you. I need analysts.

      • 27 Professor VJ Duke April 16, 2015 at 11:54

        We’d have 1911s! Wouldn’t that be awesome?

        Oh dear. I could see how that would happen. Very glad you’ve recovered, madam.

      • 28 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 16, 2015 at 19:37

        I have no idea what a 1911 is…but I’m guessing it’s a gun. So no…

        Thanks!

      • 29 Professor VJ Duke April 17, 2015 at 01:33

        What do you mean no? Don’t you just love guns? Nick would be fine with you getting me one.

      • 30 Audrey Dawn - Oldest Daughter Redheaded Sister April 20, 2015 at 03:46

        I don’t know any guns well enough to love them. Nick should have gotten you one by now, I think.

  7. 31 Princess Kick-ass April 7, 2015 at 19:10

    lol this was quite amusing. Did not expect that ending hehe

    • 32 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:17

      Imagine! Dr. Z is a brute, see.

  8. 33 Nimmi April 7, 2015 at 18:56

    Dadblameit!! Double dadblameit!!! ;)

    • 34 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:17

      *Laughing lots* You’re swearing, Nimmi!

      • 35 Nimmi April 8, 2015 at 18:35

        hahaha :D You taught me :P

      • 36 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 12:05

        You learned very well!

      • 37 Nimmi April 9, 2015 at 12:07

        Thank you, Sir!! ;)

      • 38 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 12:16

        *bows and his hat falls off*

      • 39 Nimmi April 9, 2015 at 12:21

        Hmmm… I told you before also, don’t do it, dear ;)

      • 40 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 20:07

        Oh, yes! That’s quite right. Sorry!

      • 41 Nimmi April 10, 2015 at 11:40

        Haha… No need to be sorry, dear :)

      • 42 Professor VJ Duke April 12, 2015 at 22:39

        *hides*

  9. 43 Angeline M April 7, 2015 at 18:21

    You certainly seem to be present at a lot of parties. Thinking twice is key.

    • 44 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:15

      I know…why do you suppose?

  10. 45 desertdweller29 April 7, 2015 at 17:07

    Miscommunication is the golden key to comedy. Cell phones have put an end to nearly half miscommunications and it’s really irksome. I would have laughed too, I fear.

    • 46 Professor VJ Duke April 7, 2015 at 17:39

      *laughing* You’re just as wicked as me, DD! I knew it. Yes…that’s a great quote you have up there. No doubt it comes from your discriminating wit, you know, you know.

      • 47 desertdweller29 April 7, 2015 at 18:43

        I know it, Professor! *laughs wickedly*

      • 48 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:16

        *fist thingy* It’s a good thing. Promise, DD.

  11. 49 FictionFan April 7, 2015 at 14:50

    Breeches!! I bet the men were wearing breeches!!!

    I have only one question for you. *silky but steely voice accompanied by cold glare* Why did you laugh, sir? Could it be relief that your Lisabeth was still free?!? Blue eyes, eh? A very-type girl, huh??? It all sounds as if my Professor may have spent far, far, far too much time staring at her lovely dark hair!! No wonder she was pale – as if it’s not bad enough being proposed to by the extremely weird and ungainly Dr Z, now she will have to fight off the attentions of the flirtiest philanderer who ever fickled!! You just wait till I tell Amelia what you’ve been up to… *flounces off*

    • 50 Professor VJ Duke April 7, 2015 at 17:31

      I bet a breech is in the family of a leech.

      *laughing lots and lots and lots* But…but…I’m innocent! I was describing her for your benefit. And to be fair, very-type of girl is probably more of an insult, you know, you know. Still…you have a point! *begins to scheme* Imagine if I told Amelia about this! Would there be an explosion do you suppose?

      • 51 FictionFan April 7, 2015 at 21:52

        Well, I’ve never seen leeches in breeches, not even on beaches.

        Huh! To make me jealous, you mean!! As if! Especially when my sweet Schwarzy was in the room – I barely even noticed you! You go off flirting with your Amelias and Lisabeths and Sandras and Lotties! See if I care!! *winks at Schwarzy*

      • 52 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:23

        The question is: Has FEF ever seen a leech?

        But…what if Schwarz gets a girlfriend! Just the sudden. It’s possible, you know, you know…

      • 53 FictionFan April 8, 2015 at 21:08

        Good point! Maybe they looked so good in their breeches I mistook them for men…

        Oh dear! I’d have to flounce so far away I might never find my way back!

      • 54 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 12:10

        *Laughing lots* I feel like I was just ripped the sudden!

        See, the professor has a sense of direction. Did I ever tell you that?

      • 55 FictionFan April 9, 2015 at 17:00

        *smiles wickedly*

        I don’t know if you have. But you have now!

      • 56 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 20:23

        Oh a definite sense. I’m like that lama, see.

      • 57 FictionFan April 10, 2015 at 14:27

        The Dalai Lama?!?

      • 58 Professor VJ Duke April 12, 2015 at 22:40

        Oh, I meant llama. Rats.

    • 59 L. Marie April 7, 2015 at 19:44

      Ha ha! I had the same thought too. You just put it better. :-)

  12. 60 L. Marie April 7, 2015 at 14:05

    Wow. I am overcome by the folly of Dr. Z. Ri-do-diculous. At least you could explain to him where he went wrong. Then perhaps he’ll make you his best man at his wedding.

    I’m guessing FictionFan will have something to say about your lingering description of Lisabeth. :-)

    • 61 Professor VJ Duke April 7, 2015 at 17:30

      *laughs* He did go wrong. Don’t girls sometimes cry about such things?

      Hey! That was…for you! You and FEF are always asking for descriptions.

      • 62 L. Marie April 7, 2015 at 19:42

        Duly appreciated. Now take your beating from FictionFan.

      • 63 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:18

        *raises one eyebrow* You have to save me!

  13. 64 Nicholas Warren--MPS staff member April 7, 2015 at 13:37

    I like it much.

    • 65 Professor VJ Duke April 7, 2015 at 17:29

      I thought you might.

  14. 66 Jackie April 7, 2015 at 12:48

    Holy moly manothunder! Miscommunication on steroids.

    • 67 Professor VJ Duke April 7, 2015 at 17:29

      *laughs and shakes head* What a bunch of gardoobled people, Jackie!

      • 68 Jackie April 7, 2015 at 18:14

        Indeed! So sad but amusing at the same time.

      • 69 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:15

        *shakes head* Only Dr. Z would do that, see.

      • 70 Jackie April 8, 2015 at 12:18

        *shakes head too* that is a fact! Sad but true.

      • 71 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:26

        Jackie, we should do something about it!

      • 72 Jackie April 8, 2015 at 12:31

        What do you suggest we do? I don’t really want to get in the middle of anyone’s spat.

      • 73 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 11:54

        Oh, that’s where the adventure is! Making someone cranky, see.

      • 74 Jackie April 9, 2015 at 12:09

        Easy peasy where Dr. Z is concerned!

      • 75 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 12:16

        Do you suppose he might get violent?

  15. 76 PorterGirl April 7, 2015 at 12:14

    Oh! I was just about welling up with romantic anticipation and then tragedy struck! Lisabeth seems to be a very beautiful girl and clearly head over heels for Dr Z. *Sigh* The course of true love never did run smooth…
    On the subject of love, I personally love the phrase “Gather about, gather about” and also the quotation at the beginning – such a true thing! I am going to say it to people this afternoon. I also love parties and I would love to know what the gentleman were wearing, such that could not be described!
    There – that’s enough love for one day.

    • 77 Professor VJ Duke April 7, 2015 at 17:29

      Never smooth at all. It’s like a rocky road. (That’s where the ice cream flavor comes from, I hear. But I’m sure we can’t trust that account.)

      She shouldn’t cried, you know. Then he wouldn’t have left. Oh well…

      They were probably wearing copies of…are you ready for this? THE PANTS! Anyways, that is a good saying. A mean one, too, you must admit.

      • 78 PorterGirl April 7, 2015 at 19:46

        Ah, I like that theory – maybe love is like a rocky road ice cream! With chewy bits and the like. Yes, I think that could be right, you know. (I so want it to be true!)
        You make a good point, Professor. once one person starts wailing it is only a matter of time before another joins in. her own fault, after all.
        Shock! Horror! Surely not imitation Amazing Pants?! Well, I can’t say I blame those chaps. I hope their pants don’t bite them on the rear. Mine haven’t yet, although they have threatened it once or twice.
        Well, a little mean. I sort feel like it is telling me off, a bit.

      • 79 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:21

        *laughing lots* I thought you’d take to that! Let’s just eat the icecream and forget about the rest, please.

        I think so. Have they really threatened? The buggers! Just make sure to wash them once a week. They hate getting a washing.

        Yes…what’s with that? I think he just wants to start a war.

      • 80 PorterGirl April 8, 2015 at 13:12

        *laughing even more* Very well, it is agreed. Pass me a spoon… a large one, mind.
        Yes, the buggers! In fact I think I felt them going in for a nibble just the other day. I shall boil wash them, the cheeky scamps.
        Well, if it’s a war he wants… *brandidshes baton and a knowing look*

      • 81 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 11:56

        A very large one! *passes it over* I fear it’s not golden, though.

        *laughing* For a nibble? Imagine! Boil wash them–twice!

        I think you’ll win the sudden.

      • 82 PorterGirl April 9, 2015 at 13:24

        Thank you kindly! I do not care what it is made of, just so long as it is very large.
        Imagine, indeed! I shall nibble them while they sleep, I tell you. The buggers!
        I only start wars that I know I can win. Which is all of them. Aha!

      • 83 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 20:14

        *laughs* Maybe you should just burn the pants now? I mean…you’ve seen how devilish they are!

        Wow. Well, from now on…I’ll have you start my wars!

      • 84 PorterGirl April 10, 2015 at 05:06

        *laughing lots* they are wicked, indeed! But I intend to tame them, by hook or by crook. The devils shall do my bidding. And hopefully bite my enemies.
        It would be a pleasure and an honour *flourishes baton*

      • 85 Professor VJ Duke April 12, 2015 at 22:38

        But that means your enemies have to wear them!

      • 86 PorterGirl April 13, 2015 at 11:11

        Ah, good point. I would have to tempt them into the Amazing Pants somehow. That doesn’t seem like a very good idea, somehow!

      • 87 Professor VJ Duke April 14, 2015 at 11:32

        Nah…but still…I do find it interesting. You should burn them!

      • 88 PorterGirl April 14, 2015 at 13:03

        Never! Not the Amazing Pants! but if they carry on like this they might get locked away for awhile, the buggers.

      • 89 Professor VJ Duke April 14, 2015 at 19:31

        Definitely. Let the moths get them.

  16. 90 Susan P April 7, 2015 at 12:13

    The professor sounds like he is into mysticism by the sound of his opening sally. As far as the ladies attire, I am fairly certain that if you requested for help, FeF would be delighted to explain all of that as the two of you dance. Apparently, Zauberer is a wimp and poor Lizabeth. From bliss to being tossed aside. The professor should have stepped in to safe the day!

    • 91 FictionFan April 7, 2015 at 14:55

      Don’t encourage him!! No doubt he’s proposing at this very moment!! I must teach her how to flounce…

      • 92 Susan P April 7, 2015 at 16:08

        Flounce is fun. Make sure you get pictures.

    • 93 Professor VJ Duke April 7, 2015 at 17:27

      *laughs* Don’t you suppose mysticism is good where marriage is concerned, though? *professorish eyebrow*

      Oh, dadblameit, I don’t want to know what they wear! *shivers* You mean you feel bad for Lisabeth? Why was she crying if she was happy? Defies physics, see.

      • 94 Susan P April 7, 2015 at 17:58

        Why does your eyebrow look so much like the villain in the movie?

      • 95 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:14

        Isn’t that something? I’m preparing for the robbery we have ready to go. Remember?

      • 96 Susan P April 8, 2015 at 13:23

        But…it looks kind of creepy, no offense

      • 97 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 11:59

        Well, the professor is scary!

      • 98 Susan P April 9, 2015 at 16:29

        What is the Professor scared of?

      • 99 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 20:22

        Hmm…I think Mummy Beetles.

      • 100 Susan P April 9, 2015 at 22:58

        Well, how lame is that?

      • 101 Professor VJ Duke April 12, 2015 at 22:30

        Not at all! They’re vicious!

      • 102 Susan P April 12, 2015 at 23:15

        the guppies?

      • 103 Professor VJ Duke April 14, 2015 at 11:28

        Mummy beetles!

      • 104 Susan P April 14, 2015 at 12:53

        What? No Daddy beetles?

      • 105 Professor VJ Duke April 14, 2015 at 19:29

        Now what is that?

      • 106 Susan P April 14, 2015 at 19:38

        I don’t know. You are the one who started this conversation, you tell me!

      • 107 Professor VJ Duke April 14, 2015 at 19:40

        I think…the Princess made it up!

      • 108 Susan P April 14, 2015 at 19:46

        That sounds kind of lame. The princess has much more imagination than that!

      • 109 Professor VJ Duke April 15, 2015 at 11:24

        Umm…umm…well…I know! I can tell by her picture!

      • 110 Susan P April 15, 2015 at 12:50

        *watches the Professor fall apart*

      • 111 Susan P April 7, 2015 at 17:59

        Heartless you are. A woman was tossed aside and you don’t feel bad for her?

      • 112 Professor VJ Duke April 8, 2015 at 12:14

        But didn’t she cry? She was unhappy with him, see.

      • 113 Susan P April 8, 2015 at 13:22

        After your magnificence hurt her feelings.

      • 114 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 11:59

        But she didn’t even see me, did she?

      • 115 Susan P April 9, 2015 at 16:31

        O yes. You did. Listen! Can’t you hear her crying her ears off?

      • 116 Professor VJ Duke April 9, 2015 at 20:22

        Nah…she’s just…smoking!

      • 117 Susan P April 9, 2015 at 22:59

        No…the chicken is smoking. Where is Ruber? Doesn’t he know the chicken is about to explode?

      • 118 Professor VJ Duke April 12, 2015 at 22:31

        What’s he smoking?

      • 119 Susan P April 12, 2015 at 23:16

        A fine cigar. At least last time I saw!

      • 120 Professor VJ Duke April 14, 2015 at 11:28

        Humph noodles.

      • 121 Susan P April 14, 2015 at 12:55

        I can send a box of them to you…

      • 122 Professor VJ Duke April 14, 2015 at 19:29

        Would Harry let me have them?

      • 123 Susan P April 14, 2015 at 19:40

        Harry doesn’t smoke except when he is angry.

      • 124 Professor VJ Duke April 14, 2015 at 19:41

        Very professorsish of him!

      • 125 Susan P April 14, 2015 at 19:46

        And then it comes out of his ears.

      • 126 Professor VJ Duke April 15, 2015 at 11:25

        Now I wish I could do that.


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Sunday: OFF — Day of Shalt Nots

Monday: TPL Story

Tuesday: OFF — Because I'm Gone

Wednesday: Professor Speaks

Thursday: OFF — Because Yes

Friday: OFF — All Day Sleep Does

Saturday: OFF — Blue-Footed Boobies Need Fed

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Professorish Smiley:

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or

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Depends on the day, see.

Punchy Argot:

1. Dadblameit.
2. Humdinger
3. Chickit
4. Chicky-woot-woot
5. Malediction
6. Rapscallion
7. Gardoobled
8. Congratulilolations
9. Togoggin
10. Gargonic
11. Two and Five Gurgles
12. Rats and a Heifer
13. Two nods, a wink, and an astroid
14. A bit, bits, and little bits
15. Huff-Hum and a Roar
16. So many thanks, I can't begin to thank you
17. Ri-do-diculous


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