An excerpt from PT News
Vol. XIILCCC No. 2344343998
“PT for TPL”
(1) When given into, the desire for more becomes the quest for everything.
(2) Stupidity arises from lack of understanding, lack of desiring understanding, and an overly good time.
(3) Inhumanity is often misdiagnosed. It occurs, mostly, when it rains and the worms are drowned.
Proverbs by poet V. Shnodgrate
Sandra Salami’s hospital is quickly becoming one of the most trusted medical practices in the land. Despite what the other leading (and lying, mind you) papers might say, Sandra’s hospital is timely and fair to all. Read the rest of the article on Pg. 5.
King Arthur of England is desperately trying to fight the backlash from his people, who have decided that they don’t want a king, but rather a nicer form of government. “I shall squash any uprising!” he said in a speech last week. He’s getting squashed, however.
An Excerpt from PT News
So, this professor was sitting in his office–in the PT News building, mind you–when I got a ring, and then another ring, from the telephone.
Here’s the thing, see: I started a newspaper. All the other bigger papers didn’t tell the new as it should be told.
And news needs to be told as it should be told; otherwise, it’s not the right type of news.
I do hope that makes sense.
Anyways and a few, the professor’s phone was ringing, so I picked it up.
“Hello,” I said. “This is PT News. Managing editor speaking.” I felt important straight away, mind you.
Even thought PT News is small, the other newspaper places hate on us all the time. They must be jealous, see.
“Haha nothing,” a curt voice replied. “This is Mike Manahanny.”
“Oh,” this professor replied.
You see, Mike Manahanny owns the largest paper in the big city.
“Have I ever told you,” I began, trying to change the subject that I knew was coming, “that your last name is an intense interest?”
I find that it always works well to change the subject before it’s brought up. That way you don’t need to change it.
But it didn’t work.
“I’m not taking any of that, PVJ,” he almost growled. “I want to buy your newspaper. Your paper is small, insignificant…” He paused here. “Cheap…filthy…”
It’s not filthy, I promise.
“But we make a difference,” I replied.
“Don’t get caught up on that crap,” Manahanny said. “No one cares about making a difference. It’s all about making a buck.” Then he suddenly shouted: “What?! Can’t you see I’m on the phone?”
It pays, sometimes, having a small office: You don’t get interrupted often, like Mr. Manhanny does. I do believe his staff interrupts him every other hour and then some.
“Mr. Manahanny,” I said, “listen here: I’m not going to sell. My employees wouldn’t understand–“
“Don’t give me that dirt,” he said. “You have only what? Five people on staff?”
“Four?! Haha. Just sell to me before you embarrass yourself.”
“You know what, of the sudden, I must flee. News stuff to see to. As always, having speaks with you is not much of a pleasure.”
And this professor hung up. Or pushed the button more like.
It was a good sign: Mr. Manahanny wouldn’t want to buy PT News if it wasn’t affecting him in some way.