Thrown out of Gillette Stadium (TPL Story)

Run fast, run true, run for by Charley we need you!

~ Early rhyme from V. Shnodgrate

TPLStoryPic

Here’s the thing: When you leave a place, make sure you leave, and leave.

And that’s exactly what the professor did.

I left.

Really, I left.

And left nothing behind.

Then, I made a trip to Massachusetts. To Foxboro, to be precise. It’s on the way to PT News, see. So, I decided to stop for a bit. Take a breather.

I won’t bother you with all the gory details of the journey. This professor accidentally upset a few people along the way. I think I sang twice. Danced but once. And ate three pickles in a row.

That’s about it.

Now, there was a lot of noise coming from Gillette Stadium, so I made my way there.

Gillette_Stadium01

I tried to get onto the field, but a chap was standing in the way.

“Whoa,” he said, “can’t go in. They’re practicing in there.”

“Who?” I asked.

He looked at me quizzically. “Really? The Patriots, of course.”

“Very good,” I said. “Now, let me in, my man. I’ve got a slice of bone to pick with the troops.”

“What?”

I wasn’t sure what he was getting at, really.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“What did you mean?”

“Well, I’d like to go in, if you don’t mind.”

He huffed. “But I do! You can’t go in there! GOT IT?!”

And he screamed that last part.

“Not yet.” I answered. “Yell a bit louder, please.”

He was about to do something, but at that very minute, Schwarz Tauptinker came by.

And he looked angry. He was staring intently at the guard. In fact, he didn’t even look at this professor.

“You know what,” he said, “I brought you a soda.” Schwarz held it up for inspection.

It was kiddy size.

Unknown

“Now will you let me in, chickit?” he asked.

The guard shook his head.

“If you both don’t get out of here, I’ll arrest you.”

“No you won’t!” Schwarz screamed, and he tried to rush past the guard.

But the guard caught him and they went down together.

That’s when this professor made the move.

I leapt like a gazelle, and went right over the guard and Schwarz.

It wasn’t too big of a leap since they were on the ground and all. But I’m figuring a gazelle would be a bit jealous, because I did it with only two hooves, instead of four.

Capreolus_capreolus_cloven_hoof

Then, I was on the field.

Just like that.

There was this chap standing in the middle of the field throwing balls to another chap down the field.

I joined the chap throwing balls.

It was Tom Brady.

“Your throw is rather accurate,” I said.

“That’s what I train for,” was his curt response.

“Are you a quarterback or a running back?”

He finished throwing the ball. Then he turned and looked at me.

“Idiot. Get off the field.”

I thought about it twice, then decided not to.

Brady turned to me again. “Really? Get the heck out of here. You’re on my field.”

“Your name is Gillette? I didn’t know…”

Then, I got thrown out, can you believe.

Grr.

Advertisements

152 Responses to “Thrown out of Gillette Stadium (TPL Story)”


  1. 1 erinkenobi2893 October 2, 2015 at 03:05

    That sounds as if it was fun!

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke October 2, 2015 at 13:37

      It was, but Brady hates me now.

      • 3 erinkenobi2893 October 2, 2015 at 13:46

        *shrugs* That’s not much of a loss, especially since you met him by accident.

      • 4 Professor VJ Duke October 2, 2015 at 20:20

        You do have a point.

      • 5 erinkenobi2893 October 2, 2015 at 20:37

        X-D

  2. 6 Catherine September 3, 2015 at 23:32

    Jesus, I mean, Yeezus, Kimmy and St. Joseph. I’m so glad this wasn’t Fenway. I’m even more glad it was not a Red Sox incident!

    • 7 Professor VJ Duke September 4, 2015 at 12:06

      *laughing* Wait… Are you a Red Sox fan? You must say yes!!!

  3. 8 Lady Dunamis August 16, 2015 at 17:44

    And dude what is up with three pickles? Lol!😄

    • 9 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 00:20

      *laughs* Oh come on! You know, one always has to have three pickles!

      • 10 Lady Dunamis August 18, 2015 at 00:38

        Gross. Lol!

      • 11 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 17:15

        You really hate pickles?

      • 12 Lady Dunamis August 18, 2015 at 18:13

        Well, hate is a pretty strong word. It’s not a food I frequently except on a burger and even then I would pick it off.

      • 13 Professor VJ Duke August 19, 2015 at 21:30

        And give it to me. I do hope you don’t throw them on the floor.

      • 14 Lady Dunamis August 19, 2015 at 23:31

        Nah. I would gladly give you the pickles. And whadaya know, I am watching west Texas investors show and they are talking about pickles…lol

      • 15 Professor VJ Duke August 21, 2015 at 00:20

        *laughing lots* I did that on purpose!

  4. 16 Lady Dunamis August 16, 2015 at 17:43

    I must admit. The hoofs were a nice touch and thank you for the New England tour. It’s been a few years since I have been on the east coast.

    • 17 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 00:20

      You wouldn’t be a Pats fan, would you, Lady?

      • 18 Lady Dunamis August 18, 2015 at 00:38

        Um no. In fact I always thought they were an arrogant bunch ya know.

      • 19 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 17:15

        Oh rats. Steeler fan?

      • 20 Lady Dunamis August 18, 2015 at 18:12

        Nah. Left the love of football a long time ago.

      • 21 Professor VJ Duke August 19, 2015 at 21:30

        Good for you. Such a sensible lady, you are.

      • 22 Lady Dunamis August 19, 2015 at 23:25

        😊

  5. 23 Susan P August 13, 2015 at 19:54

    Such heroism. Such bravery. Such derring do. Oh my. They should give you a medal. I don’t understand why that man got so angry. It looks to me like there’s room for everyone to share. So sad that people can’t share.

    • 24 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2015 at 13:40

      Yes! George would’ve fetched him. A scratch on the leg and he’d come around.

      • 25 Susan P August 14, 2015 at 22:16

        There you go. I say, if a fellow has a good response for everything, well, he should be treated with a root beer float.

      • 26 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 00:18

        Yes!! That sounds like tops suggestion.

      • 27 Susan P August 18, 2015 at 13:36

        At least we agree on something!

      • 28 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 17:20

        Let’s have a party.

      • 29 Susan P August 18, 2015 at 18:19

        I can agree to that. What kind?

      • 30 Professor VJ Duke August 19, 2015 at 21:31

        One when everyone dances around tables and sings loudly.

      • 31 Susan P August 20, 2015 at 13:16

        I’m on it.

  6. 32 Heartafire August 13, 2015 at 00:21

    thank you for the gazelle feet, it added to the dignity of your experience in Foxboro. How dare they toss out the Professor, surely once they discovered their mistake (you did say “do you know who I am?” , that sometimes works for me) they have sent you a letter of apology and season tickets. We Dolphin fans would welcome you with open arms…those New Englanders, this is an outrage!

    • 33 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2015 at 13:26

      *gulps* You’re a Dolphins fan? Bet you hate the Pats!

      Now, Hollie, I’m greatly interested that you say that! I shall have to try it. Does it usually work?

      • 34 Heartafire August 14, 2015 at 13:33

        yes, but you must be indignant and flash the crazy eyes, that works every time.

  7. 35 Simply Skeptical August 12, 2015 at 22:34

    I just had to look at this again. Do you find those deer feet a bit morbid? eeks…..

    • 36 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2015 at 13:19

      Well, they’re probably still alive!

      • 37 Simply Skeptical August 15, 2015 at 19:12

        worse yet since they’re not facing in the appropriate direction.

      • 38 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 00:18

        They are too!

  8. 39 John W. Howell August 12, 2015 at 20:03

    Athletes seem to have no sense of humor. Might be something they are taking.

    • 40 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2015 at 21:32

      I think you could definitely be right. Is it the steroids?

      • 41 John W. Howell August 12, 2015 at 21:47

        I’m just saying

      • 42 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2015 at 13:17

        And pointing some fingers…

      • 43 John W. Howell August 14, 2015 at 16:24

        True

      • 44 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 00:11

        Which is a good thing that must be done.

      • 45 John W. Howell August 18, 2015 at 12:47

        True again.

      • 46 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 17:18

        I’m more truer than I’ve ever been, I’m thinking.

      • 47 John W. Howell August 18, 2015 at 18:56

        Of course when people say that one begins to think the opposite.

      • 48 Professor VJ Duke August 19, 2015 at 21:33

        OH dear. Now I’m a fake.

      • 49 John W. Howell August 19, 2015 at 22:00

        Noooo. Just have to be careful how many times we posture the truth. Think Madoff.

      • 50 Professor VJ Duke August 21, 2015 at 00:18

        Madoff…now, who is this?

      • 51 John W. Howell August 21, 2015 at 12:30

        Bernie Madoff is a guy who set up a giant swindle and took millions with the simple phrase “The truth is I can get you 20% return on your money.”

      • 52 Professor VJ Duke August 21, 2015 at 17:03

        And I suppose it was a big lie.

      • 53 John W. Howell August 21, 2015 at 18:23

        So big he went to jail and his clients lost hundreds of millions

      • 54 Professor VJ Duke August 22, 2015 at 17:20

        Hm. I hope he got beat a bit, too.

      • 55 John W. Howell August 22, 2015 at 20:14

        I think he is having a bad time in jail.

      • 56 Professor VJ Duke August 24, 2015 at 19:44

        Poor chap.

      • 57 John W. Howell August 24, 2015 at 21:28

        Not so much.

      • 58 Professor VJ Duke August 25, 2015 at 13:18

        *laughs*

  9. 59 desertdweller29 August 12, 2015 at 19:34

    You should have brought a ball pump to the field. That would have put the bunch in Brady! I mean, punch in Brady.

    Might I say, Professor, your hooves are quite fetching!

    • 60 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2015 at 21:31

      *laughs* How wicked! You know they didn’t cheat, DD!

      Aren’t they? Should I go out with them? I might be nervous about how they’ll be received.

      • 61 desertdweller29 August 12, 2015 at 22:25

        It behooves you to not show the world your dancing hooves, Professor!

        Regarding Brady… I would never trust a man that pretty! I would only gaze upon him at a distance. Especially considering how rude he was to you. Then I might launch a couple spit balls at him, just to be wicked of course.

      • 62 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2015 at 13:18

        *laughing* Good one, DD! Aren’t they something, though?

        He’s pretty? How about a water balloon?

  10. 63 Nancy Loderick August 12, 2015 at 19:11

    Hey Professor,

    I now have a vision of you singing and dancing your way into Gillette Stadium! Did you happen to bring your guitar along with you as well?

    As for Tom Brady and the Patriots. We New Englanders take our football VERY seriously and no one should mess with us.

    Present company excluded of course, since I am not much of a football fan. :)

    Nancy

    • 64 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2015 at 21:31

      No, just my katana, I fear. I only hummed, don’t you know.

      I love the Pats! Just like Mr. Ken, see.

      But I bet you were pulling for the Pats last season!

      • 65 Nancy Loderick August 16, 2015 at 15:06

        Well Professor,

        I guess you could say I am a “fair weather” fan. Although, I have completely given up on the Red Sox!

        Nancy

      • 66 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 00:19

        No! Don’t do that. They’ll get it together!

  11. 67 Debbie August 12, 2015 at 18:13

    Where shall I begin? By that I mean the image of the Professor singing — and dancing! — his way clear to Massachusetts must have been a sight to behold. You’re quite fortunate you didn’t get arrested or something, you know!

    So we’re still talking about Mr. Brady, hmm? Well, I suppose FF would lump him into the same pool of eye candy as Raffa or Mr. Darby, but my respect for him dropped immensely after Deflategate. Now he’s just another arrogant athlete who seems to think talent puts him above the law (it’s not like the Pats even needed to tamper with those balls, you know!)

    Meanwhile, I’m kind of fascinated by the gazelle hooves!!

    • 68 FictionFan August 12, 2015 at 19:54

      *thinks of Rafa, Tom and Darby all together in a pool and has to be rushed off for emergency resuscitation* Was George there too?! *collapses again*

      • 69 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2015 at 21:32

        *then thinks about Rafa’s music video and dies*

      • 70 FictionFan August 13, 2015 at 00:33

        *laughs and cries* So cruel!

      • 71 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2015 at 13:29

        Haha! I win. You lose. Again. (That’s my victory speech.)

      • 72 FictionFan August 14, 2015 at 19:51

        A temporary victory…

        (Can you please tell me how we seem to have got back up to 500 conversations again? It’s baffling…)

      • 73 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 00:16

        (I’m sorry! I do think it’s my fault. Quit being so dadblame fun to have speaks with!)

      • 74 FictionFan August 18, 2015 at 16:01

        (Yes, I think it’s your fault too. Because if it wasn’t, it’d have to be mine… We’ve just added another two. What should we do??? *helpless expression*)

      • 75 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 17:28

        (Just keep talking! That’s the only thing for it. I’m thinking it’s your fault, Aravis.)

      • 76 FictionFan August 19, 2015 at 16:15

        (Well, I don’t know… ‘cos it only happens to me when I’m talking to you, whereas it happens to you whoever you’re talking to… I think it’s you! *nods head like Sherlock Holmes when he’s just revealed the culprit*)

      • 77 Professor VJ Duke August 19, 2015 at 21:41

        (Oh. Well…now you’re saying I talk too much. I should retire.)

      • 78 FictionFan August 20, 2015 at 14:16

        (Never! Never!! NEVER!!! You must keep practising – I’ve entered us for the Synchronised Chatting Event in the Rio Olympics…)

      • 79 Professor VJ Duke August 21, 2015 at 00:39

        (Oh, we’d win easy. I can talk…a mile a minute!)

      • 80 FictionFan August 21, 2015 at 18:24

        *nods*

      • 81 Professor VJ Duke August 22, 2015 at 17:22

        *laughs*

    • 82 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2015 at 21:30

      Well, it could be said, “the professor partied all the way to Massachusetts.” That’d be righto on, I”m thinking. Now, maybe I didn’t dance, after all!

      But, Debbie! They didn’t cheat. Brady said he didn’t, don’t you know.

      Aren’t they something? I just bought ’em.

      • 83 Debbie August 12, 2015 at 22:51

        The prisons are FULL of people who say they didn’t do what they’ve been found guilty of, Professor! By the way, what in the world are you going to do with gazelle hooves???

      • 84 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2015 at 13:20

        Don’t you suppose 60% of them are right?

        Well, those hooves might be a good decoy, if you’re hunting a deer!

  12. 85 Simply Skeptical August 12, 2015 at 17:26

    That was unbelievably rude to the Professor! They forget who earns them their high way of living, but then again what do you expect from cheaters and guards of cheaters….?…

    • 86 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2015 at 21:29

      Hey now! They didn’t cheat!!!

  13. 87 FictionFan August 12, 2015 at 16:19

    I had all kinds of things to say – and some of them were brilliant insightful and extremely witty, I must admit – but I’ve been rendered totally and utterly gardoobled to the point of speechlessness… well, typelessness, I suppose really, if you want to be pedantic about it… by the astonishing revelation snuck sneakily into the middle of the whole thing…

    THE PROFESSOR DANCED!!!!!!!!!! *jumps up and down, claps hands and squeals in girlish glee!!*

    PS – Is Tom Brady just as gorgeous close up? Are his shoulders as wide as they look? Was he wearing… *pauses for a moment to regain equilibrium…* his dinky little trouser thingies??

    PPS It’s good to note that Shnoddy’s early attempts at poetry are just as… ahem… good as his later works.

    • 88 FictionFan August 12, 2015 at 16:21

      PPPS Danced… with whom?! *narrows eyes and growls*

      • 89 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2015 at 21:29

        Should I say?

      • 90 FictionFan August 13, 2015 at 00:32

        Wrong answer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The right answer would have been “Nobody!” *growls and flounces and stampedes*

      • 91 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2015 at 13:29

        I was dancing with…Freya!

      • 92 FictionFan August 14, 2015 at 19:50

        *gets ready to rampage more than she has ever rampaged before…then pauses* Wait! Freya the dog? Oh, that’s alright then! You don’t have to be beaten after all…

      • 93 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 00:16

        Yes! My little pooch. We’ve actually attempted a dance before. She doesn’t like it much. Which is funny.

      • 94 FictionFan August 18, 2015 at 15:59

        *gasps* So!!! The truth is out!!! You’d rather dance with your dog than your FEF!!! *flounces off, plotting revenge*

      • 95 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 17:28

        *laughs* You might not call what we do dancing. She jumps up, and I try to get her to move a bit.

      • 96 FictionFan August 19, 2015 at 16:13

        *laughs* I have noted her tecnique and will start practising forthwith…

      • 97 Professor VJ Duke August 19, 2015 at 21:40

        You’d probably be the one to teach me…but dancing…you have to get…to close! Like wrestling. Only wrestling is more fun. I’d be Ryback.

      • 98 FictionFan August 20, 2015 at 14:10

        Not in the cotillion – hand-holding only. You can do that – practice by holding Freya’s paw… *jumps back in alarm* Good grief! That’s a discombobulating thought! Please don’t be!

      • 99 Professor VJ Duke August 21, 2015 at 00:37

        Only hand holding? Hmm…I don’t like it much. I might rebel. *laughs* Isn’t he cool?

      • 100 FictionFan August 21, 2015 at 18:24

        Ooh, dancing with rebels is even more fun! NO!!! HE’S NOT!!!

      • 101 Professor VJ Duke August 22, 2015 at 17:21

        I’m a bad rebel. Very rebellious. I can’t believe you don’t like him either!! How about Jon Cena?

      • 102 FictionFan August 23, 2015 at 15:15

        Well, he’s marginally better, I admit – but just in general I have an antipathy towards men whose necks are wider than their heads…

      • 103 Professor VJ Duke August 24, 2015 at 19:56

        *laughing lots and lots* Yes, he does have that problem.

    • 104 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2015 at 21:28

      Typelessness! I love that lots. Typelessness.

      Well…well…only a little one! And you can’t prove I did it, as well. Maybe I’ll take it back. Then you’ll just have to believe me again.

      TB was cranky mad at me, that’s for sure. I couldn’t see through his helmet, but, yes, he looked super cool. Nah, he was wearing board shorts. That’s the practice uniform, see.

      Wasn’t that a great little poem?

      • 105 FictionFan August 13, 2015 at 00:31

        *curtseys*

        Can so! It says so in writing so it must be true! I bet you dance all the time! No excuses for avoiding that cotillion now, sir! *rubs hands gleefully and does stretching exercises*

        Hmm… Tom in shorts, eh? I hope you took photos…

        Great… well, I’m not sure that’s the exact word I’d have used…

      • 106 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2015 at 13:29

        I’ll just edit the post is all! Well, okay, I might do professorish dancing at times, to music and stuff, but I don’t dance in the real meaning of the word. There. You know all.

        Of his shorts? Whatever for?

        I’m sure he’d love your poem.

      • 107 FictionFan August 14, 2015 at 19:48

        Ooooh! Tell Tick to get that on video! This is something that should not be lost to posterity!!

        Me.

        *laughs* Sadly, you may be right…

      • 108 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 00:15

        No! I’d die from shame!

        Not so, young lady! I forbid it. So there!

        I think I could be. And that might be a good thing.

      • 109 FictionFan August 18, 2015 at 15:57

        That would be sad, of course, but would you deny me so much pleasure just because of a little thing like that?

        Ooooh, I love it when you get all masterful! It’s sooo cute!

      • 110 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 17:28

        Dying isn’t a little thing! Some say it’s the biggest journey ever. Plus, I’m too old to die properly yet.

        Cute? Cute? It’s supposed to be scary!!

      • 111 FictionFan August 19, 2015 at 16:10

        Oh OK! If you feel that strongly about it, you can live!

        *chuckles* Oh yes… that’s what I meant to say! *cowers in fear*

      • 112 Professor VJ Duke August 19, 2015 at 21:40

        Thanks bunches! *pulls cloak tight about him*

        Hmm…I’m not convinced, you know.

  14. 113 sonmi upon the Cloud August 12, 2015 at 14:57

    “Idiot. Get off the field.”- would you like me to release the hounds?

    – sonmi upon the Cloud

    • 114 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2015 at 21:27

      Yes please! I’m cranky, see.

      • 115 sonmi upon the Cloud August 13, 2015 at 09:15

        I’ll burp you and put you down for an afternoon nap then too. *laughs*

        – sonmi.u.t.C

      • 116 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2015 at 13:33

        Hey now! None of that. I’m a fierce warrior!

  15. 117 walt walker August 12, 2015 at 14:27

    I think the one who throws is the pitcher and the one who catches is the catcher. Catcher I understand. But I always thought pitcher should be thrower. A pitcher is what holds the pickle juice.

    • 118 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2015 at 21:27

      *laughing* You’re making a lot of sense today, Mr. Walt, I must admit. I do wonder. Maybe the pitchers historically drank pickle juice before practice?

  16. 119 totallycaroline August 12, 2015 at 12:31

    Three pickles in a row? I hope they were dill pickles!

    • 120 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2015 at 21:26

      They were! Have you ever had three in a row?

  17. 121 PorterGirl August 12, 2015 at 12:11

    Firstly – I quite like that rhyme. Secondly – dancing and singing, Professor? Why, you must have been in a jolly mood. The pickles -where they the sweet pickles, do you suppose? I am rather fascinated by pickles, since you brought the subject up just the other day. You could have at least asked Mr Brady if he had a spare hat for me.

    • 122 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2015 at 21:26

      I loved the rhyme! Thank you. Well…well…I did just say that didn’t I?! *shakes head* Rats. I’m thinking you tricked me into it, don’t you know.

      Yes, the pickles! But they were all dill, I fear.

      *laughs* A spare hat! Yes, I should’ve. But I bet he wouldn’t have given it to you, you know.

      • 123 PorterGirl August 13, 2015 at 04:17

        *laughing* I think you must really like dancing, in truth. Unless you tricked yourself, which would be rather clever. Dill would do, the little fellows are quite tasty I find. The bugger! He must have many of those hats. And I only want a small one. The beast.

      • 124 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2015 at 13:32

        I do not dance–at all! Dadblameit.

        I know! We could raid his locker, if you’d like. That’d be fun.

      • 125 PorterGirl August 14, 2015 at 13:44

        I know, I know – you never dance and you definitely don’t have two hearts. Oooh locker raiding sounds very fun. Although, I bet it is very smelly in there. But it will be worth it to steal a hat.

      • 126 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2015 at 13:45

        Yes, quite right! Why…if that all was true…I’d be romantic!

        It might be smelly. But…imagine the trophies we could steal!

      • 127 PorterGirl August 14, 2015 at 13:48

        Which, of course, we all know that you are most unromantic – isn’t that right, Professor?
        Yes, imagine! Right – I’m in. We shall just have to breath through our mouths. Come on, let us set about stealing and smuggling.

      • 128 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 00:09

        Quite right! I have the disposition of dust mite!

        Or we can have masks of sorts, if that helps.

      • 129 PorterGirl August 18, 2015 at 04:18

        A particularly vicious dust mite at that! Oh yes masks could be helpful. I want a Dartg Vadar one.

      • 130 Professor VJ Duke August 18, 2015 at 17:17

        Ooo, good pick! I’ll take one, too, just because.

      • 131 PorterGirl August 18, 2015 at 17:44

        Excellent then – that will confuse the buggers totally.

      • 132 Professor VJ Duke August 19, 2015 at 21:29

        I’ve always wanted to breath like that.

      • 133 PorterGirl August 20, 2015 at 04:12

        *does the breathing* I am your father…

      • 134 Professor VJ Duke August 21, 2015 at 00:23

        *does Luke* Nooooooooooooooooooo! Such an easy line.

      • 135 PorterGirl August 21, 2015 at 07:23

        *laughs* We should do a Star Wars tribute act. We are fabulous at it.

      • 136 Professor VJ Duke August 21, 2015 at 16:57

        *laughs* That would be the most hilarious thing. You could be the Wookie, too.

      • 137 PorterGirl August 22, 2015 at 07:26

        Well! Thanks for that. I would make a marvellous big hairy thing *laughs*

      • 138 Professor VJ Duke August 22, 2015 at 17:26

        *laughing lots* Sorry! It’s just, I don’t want to be that thing!

      • 139 PorterGirl August 23, 2015 at 14:50

        *laughing lots* I don’t mind. I smell like a wookie anyways.

      • 140 Professor VJ Duke August 24, 2015 at 19:50

        *laughing* I bet the Wookie’s soaped everyday.

      • 141 PorterGirl August 25, 2015 at 06:03

        He would need to be. I wonder what his breath is like? *shudders*

      • 142 Professor VJ Duke August 25, 2015 at 13:25

        Maybe he’s got mints, too?

      • 143 PorterGirl August 25, 2015 at 13:36

        Yes, you would think that Princess Leia might make sure of that, what with being a princess and all.

      • 144 Professor VJ Duke August 26, 2015 at 12:07

        Yes, quite right. I do think she would. But then again, she was chained to a worm at one point, so we can’t expect too much from her.

      • 145 PorterGirl August 26, 2015 at 12:31

        *laughing lots* She must have a very strong stomach for such things, certainly! I don’t envy her that I must say.

      • 146 Professor VJ Duke August 26, 2015 at 20:48

        Right. I don’t either…though, I’ve always wondered what Jabba felt like. Sticky or just wet?

      • 147 PorterGirl August 27, 2015 at 06:16

        Eeeew! Well, I think he feels sort of knobbly but with a thin coating of something slimy. Now I really wish I wasn’t thinking about that *laughs*

      • 148 Professor VJ Duke August 27, 2015 at 12:37

        *shudders* That is a horrid thought. I do wonder where he keeps his heart, too.

      • 149 PorterGirl August 27, 2015 at 12:40

        In his knee? But then, where does he keep his knee? It is all too complicated.

      • 150 Professor VJ Duke August 27, 2015 at 12:41

        *laughs* That’s where you seep yours? I bet he doesn’t have to seep a kettle. He eats slobby fish.

      • 151 PorterGirl August 27, 2015 at 12:43

        I keep mine in the usual place, but it is disguised as a pork chop. Just in case, you know. He is a rather foul thing, all round.

      • 152 Professor VJ Duke August 27, 2015 at 20:33

        *laughing* He is definitely a foul thing. And a bugger!


Say something...anything...O Punchy Family!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s




TPL Schedule

Sunday: OFF — Day of Shalt Nots

Monday: TPL Story

Tuesday: OFF — Because I'm Gone

Wednesday: Professor Speaks

Thursday: OFF — Because Yes

Friday: OFF — All Day Sleep Does

Saturday: OFF — Blue-Footed Boobies Need Fed

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email!

Join 1,871 other followers

Follow The Punchy Lands! on WordPress.com

Blog Stats

  • 114,371 hits

Join the Professor on Twitter!

Professorish Smiley:

==[:-{)=

or

==[:-{)+

Depends on the day, see.

Punchy Argot:

1. Dadblameit.
2. Humdinger
3. Chickit
4. Chicky-woot-woot
5. Malediction
6. Rapscallion
7. Gardoobled
8. Congratulilolations
9. Togoggin
10. Gargonic
11. Two and Five Gurgles
12. Rats and a Heifer
13. Two nods, a wink, and an astroid
14. A bit, bits, and little bits
15. Huff-Hum and a Roar
16. So many thanks, I can't begin to thank you
17. Ri-do-diculous


%d bloggers like this: