Eyes are Important [Movie Ft.]

Mr. Magi held up a picture.

“What sort of eye is this? Who does it belong to, is what I mean.”

This professor looked closely, and so did Schwarz Tauptinker.

hamiltonEye (1)

“Umm,” I said, “that eye belongs to…a pretty girl, I’d say.”

“Nah,” Schwarz disagreed. “That’s a lizard’s eye.”

“Now,” Mr. Magi said, “here’s another picture, zoomed out a bit.”

hamiltonEye

“Rats and a heifer,” I said, “pigs have awesome eyes, it must be said.”

“I don’t know what this pig is doing with a lizard’s eye,” Schwarz said.

“You should ask your Aunt Liz,” Mr. Magi said, putting the picture away. “She’s an expert in lizards, isn’t she? Never mind. Now, the reason I did this experiment is to show you that lizards–”

“Pigs, you mean,” this professor interrupted.

“Right!” Mr. Magi hurriedly said. “That pigs are as intelligent as humans.”

That stopped this professor and Schwarz cold.

“I don’t like it,” Schwarz said.

“Oh yes,” Mr. Magi said. “It’s said that if you sing a pig a lullaby, he’ll go to sleep.”

“Not a lullaby like this,” I said.

“I’m not sure what that has to do with pigs being like humans,” Mr. Magi said.

“And I’m not sure what pigs have to do with humans,” this professor said.

“I’m going to ask Liz about the lizards,” Schwarz returned.

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133 Responses to “Eyes are Important [Movie Ft.]”


  1. 1 erinkenobi2893 October 2, 2015 at 02:48

    Now, there is a chance that I might be an ambulatory lizard. But I think that chance is rather small. And there is no chance at all that I am a pig. Pigs can’t look dramatic in cloaks, you see. And there’s proof that pigs, intelligent as they are, still lack the one definitive characteristic of Things That Are Like Humans.

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke October 2, 2015 at 13:34

      There you are. Sound reasoning too. Are you Reason-ist?

      • 3 erinkenobi2893 October 2, 2015 at 13:50

        I think I might be Logician! Which is just as good as Magician, you know.

      • 4 Professor VJ Duke October 2, 2015 at 20:22

        Even better, I think.

      • 5 erinkenobi2893 October 2, 2015 at 20:34

        Hurrah!

  2. 6 L. Marie September 1, 2015 at 13:18

    Bravo! Well played!!! I’m curious about the arrangement. Whose handiwork is it (besides Brahms)?
    Wow. Pig should be used to model eye shadow.

    • 7 Professor VJ Duke September 1, 2015 at 21:34

      Thanks bunches, Linda!! Well, the other song with Brahms is Have to Say I Love You In A Song by Jim Croce. I arranged it for guitar. Worked together beautifully, I thought.

      Isn’t that pig something?

  3. 8 Simply Skeptical August 29, 2015 at 00:09

    I never realized pigs had such beautiful eyes. I have heard they are intelligent. Should we waste such intelligence on bacon???

    • 9 Professor VJ Duke August 31, 2015 at 19:56

      Well, intelligent bacon surely makes you more intelligent when you eat it, right?

  4. 10 Nimmi August 28, 2015 at 18:15

    Hey my shinning star, VC!! Hope you are doin’ great. And, as always you charm me with the sweet music you play… Thanks for sharing dear :) <3

    • 11 Professor VJ Duke August 31, 2015 at 19:55

      Nimmi! Thanks so much. Really appreciate it, you know. How’ve you been?

      • 12 Nimmi September 2, 2015 at 08:26

        Aw! Glad to know that 😊 Got little relieved from work so, came back to our beautiful world πŸ˜„ How are you my dear! πŸ’–

      • 13 Professor VJ Duke September 2, 2015 at 18:49

        I’m doing super spicy! How’s work going for you? Lots of busy stuff?

      • 14 Nimmi September 3, 2015 at 14:24

        Spicy huh!! That’s tasty πŸ˜‰ Work is little heavy these days… However, things are getting better πŸ˜‰

      • 15 Professor VJ Duke September 3, 2015 at 23:05

        I’m not tasty!! That’s very good to hear. I dare say, you need a holiday, madam.

      • 16 Nimmi September 4, 2015 at 18:26

        Haha.. I think so πŸ˜‰ I’m also in need of a holiday 😊 Thank you, dear! πŸ’–

      • 17 Professor VJ Duke September 4, 2015 at 20:04

        To the beach or the arctic?

      • 18 Nimmi September 6, 2015 at 15:49

        Let me think dear! ;) You tell me which place is best?? :)

      • 19 Professor VJ Duke September 7, 2015 at 15:34

        Well, hath thou ever been to the beach?

      • 20 Nimmi September 7, 2015 at 15:55

        Oh! I have many beaches around my place 😊 You know Kerala which is a beautiful state of India, is surrounded with water 😊
        So, yes I did πŸ˜‰

      • 21 Professor VJ Duke September 8, 2015 at 12:42

        Wow! How cool would it be to visit there? Is the water warm? Over here, sometimes, the water is quite cool.

      • 22 Nimmi September 8, 2015 at 16:58

        You are most welcome, dear! Just inform me before you come 😊 And the water is just perfect here ☺

      • 23 Professor VJ Duke September 9, 2015 at 13:02

        Is it? I would swim a bit. But I usually sink, you know.

      • 24 Nimmi September 11, 2015 at 18:56

        Haha 😁 Don’t worry I won’t let you sink πŸ˜‰

      • 25 Professor VJ Duke September 11, 2015 at 20:13

        All the way to the bottom, I’ll sink! Then I’ll drown.

      • 26 Nimmi September 12, 2015 at 07:40

        No, honey!! I won’t let you sink… Will give you all the safety measures :)

      • 27 Professor VJ Duke September 14, 2015 at 23:36

        You mean those kiddy arm thingies? I shan’t wear them, madam!!

      • 28 Nimmi September 15, 2015 at 16:12

        Hahaha πŸ˜‚ oh! My my…. you are so sweet πŸ’– 😊

      • 29 Professor VJ Duke September 16, 2015 at 13:08

        But I won’t! *stamps foot*

      • 30 Nimmi September 16, 2015 at 19:44

        Haha… okay okay no worries πŸ˜‰

      • 31 Professor VJ Duke September 17, 2015 at 13:01

        Then I’ll sink.

      • 32 Nimmi September 17, 2015 at 18:35

        Oh, dear!! I didn’t mean that… never let you sink my sweet and bright star πŸ˜ŠπŸ’–

      • 33 Professor VJ Duke September 20, 2015 at 00:35

        The sharks might come get me, too, you know.

      • 34 Nimmi September 20, 2015 at 15:52

        Hmmm… that can be a another possibility however, shark don’t know that I’m more dangerous then the shark πŸ˜‰

      • 35 Professor VJ Duke September 23, 2015 at 19:16

        You are? Coolness! Me…too, the sudden!

      • 36 Nimmi September 23, 2015 at 20:37

        Haha.. See ;) Then we are safe dear :)

      • 37 Professor VJ Duke September 24, 2015 at 12:29

        I suppose you’re right, the sudden.

      • 38 Nimmi September 24, 2015 at 16:41

        Thank goodness… ;) Let’s go for a swim then :)

      • 39 Professor VJ Duke September 25, 2015 at 13:14

        But what if the water is cold?

      • 40 Nimmi September 25, 2015 at 15:05

        Oh, dear!! Until you won’t touch the water how could you know that the water is cold or hot? ;)

      • 41 Professor VJ Duke September 26, 2015 at 00:10

        That’s a good point. You go first and let me know!

      • 42 Nimmi September 26, 2015 at 15:36

        Haha… Smart huh!! ;)

      • 43 Professor VJ Duke September 27, 2015 at 19:04

        I”m wicked, I know.

      • 44 Nimmi September 29, 2015 at 07:25

        Indeed!! :P

  5. 45 Julie Harris August 28, 2015 at 16:19

    As always- loved the video!! The guitar playing was stellar!

    • 46 Professor VJ Duke August 31, 2015 at 19:53

      Thanks Julie! Means a lot from you!

  6. 47 desertdweller29 August 28, 2015 at 15:35

    Well, as you know, or you should, these are my favorite! However, you are being held captive in a dungeon! Is it that wretched castle in which you overthrew a party? Did they finally lock you away? It must be days since I see a beard forming on the Professor, which looks quite nice, I may add. However, in three months you may end up looking like Gandalf. Write “help” on the dusty table if so and we’ll come fetch you!

    • 48 Professor VJ Duke August 31, 2015 at 19:53

      Exactly right! *laughs* I crashed a party and they threw me in this room with nothing but a guitar, so…I started to play some bits! But, DD, that’s why I made the video, you must come bust me out now, please. I’d love a long white beard like gandalf! Then people would believe me when I say I’m old.

  7. 49 Susan P August 28, 2015 at 15:27

    As I said on FACE BOOK it was spectacular..

    • 50 Professor VJ Duke August 31, 2015 at 19:51

      But are you sure that’s the professor?

      • 51 Susan P August 31, 2015 at 20:43

        If it isn’t, someone will straiten it out.

      • 52 Professor VJ Duke September 1, 2015 at 11:44

        Like Susan might, for instance.

      • 53 Susan P September 1, 2015 at 14:37

        Well, we first born types tend in that direction.

      • 54 Professor VJ Duke September 1, 2015 at 21:35

        I’m a middle born bloke, in all honesty.

      • 55 Susan P September 2, 2015 at 00:13

        Well, that was not meant for you, you see.

      • 56 Professor VJ Duke September 2, 2015 at 18:43

        But I wanted it to be, dadblameit! Here’s a squash.

      • 57 Susan P September 2, 2015 at 20:30

        So sorry. You have to work up to that, don’t you see? No privilege here.

      • 58 Professor VJ Duke September 3, 2015 at 12:49

        Not even for this shiny squash?

      • 59 Susan P September 3, 2015 at 13:24

        Especially not for that.

      • 60 Professor VJ Duke September 3, 2015 at 23:01

        You’re just a squash hater.

      • 61 Susan P September 4, 2015 at 01:01

        Did you say I like to squash haters? What?

      • 62 Professor VJ Duke September 4, 2015 at 12:11

        Well… *laughs* Dost thou hate squash?

      • 63 Susan P September 5, 2015 at 13:23

        It depends on the squash and whether someone else has prepared them.

      • 64 Professor VJ Duke September 7, 2015 at 15:31

        Oh, it’d be dastardly raw.

      • 65 Susan P September 7, 2015 at 21:33

        How would that work out?

      • 66 Professor VJ Duke September 8, 2015 at 12:44

        Depends if you cooked it nicely or wickedly, I’m thinking.

      • 67 Susan P September 8, 2015 at 14:57

        But what if I make squish instead of squash?

      • 68 Professor VJ Duke September 9, 2015 at 12:58

        Well, I might try squish if it was red.

      • 69 Susan P September 9, 2015 at 13:32

        Great. You’re on. We will have a squish tournament.

      • 70 Professor VJ Duke September 10, 2015 at 12:50

        I shall win, you know.

      • 71 Susan P September 10, 2015 at 13:17

        I don’t think so. I have George coaching me.

      • 72 Professor VJ Duke September 11, 2015 at 12:23

        He’s a nice chap.

      • 73 Susan P September 12, 2015 at 14:40

        He’s a great babysitter, too.

      • 74 Professor VJ Duke September 14, 2015 at 23:37

        But he’d eat the babies if they were small enough.

      • 75 Susan P September 15, 2015 at 13:55

        It would be a good way to decrease surplus population.

      • 76 Professor VJ Duke September 16, 2015 at 13:03

        Scrooge!

      • 77 Susan P September 17, 2015 at 14:07

        Is that you?

      • 78 Professor VJ Duke September 20, 2015 at 00:26

        Now why would I be him?

      • 79 Susan P September 20, 2015 at 16:19

        Well, you seem to be a great number of people.

      • 80 Professor VJ Duke September 23, 2015 at 19:16

        I do have MPD, it’s true.

  8. 81 FictionFan August 28, 2015 at 14:57

    Excellent as always!

    • 82 Professor VJ Duke August 31, 2015 at 19:47

      FEF, thanks bunches!

  9. 83 Debbie August 28, 2015 at 14:37

    I could get sooo used to watching a video from you on Fridays, Professor! This one is just tops! Two lovely songs, you know, and very well played. I’m a bit puzzled by your surroundings, though I love the message at the end! And I have to ask, when are you busting out those red Chucks??? We need to see them!

    • 84 Professor VJ Duke August 31, 2015 at 19:47

      Aw, thanks, Debbie! That’s too sweet. Aren’t those songs the best? Love Croce half to many deaths. Wasn’t that the bestest of sub screens? See, there’s a good reason never to dust. Look how handy it was! Now, what is a red chuck?

      • 85 Debbie August 31, 2015 at 20:18

        Yes, very clever with the Subscribe — did you find dust on that table thingy or did you have to manufacture some??

        You’re kidding about the Chucks, right? Didn’t you tell me you’d bought a pair of red Converse sneakers?! *taps toe impatiently* I think they’ll be a big hit!!

      • 86 Professor VJ Duke September 1, 2015 at 11:44

        Oh no, I found it all dusty and ready! *laughs* I would like to know how to manufacture dust, though. That sounds fun.

        Ohhhhhhhh! Is that what they’re called? I was about to get them but I never got around to it. Did I say I got them? My mind sometimes. I should get them. That’s very true.

  10. 87 Heartafire August 28, 2015 at 14:15

    Bravo! Hat’s off Professor! You are truly gifted.
    Are you being held prisoner…and being made to sew?

    • 88 Professor VJ Duke August 31, 2015 at 19:46

      Thanks bunches, Hollie! Really do appreciate it…but maybe that’s not me!

      I am! In a stone cavern or something. And sew! I’m horrible at it, don’t you know.

      • 89 Heartafire August 31, 2015 at 19:59

        That’s not you? I am so embarrassed, quick the paper bag!

      • 90 Professor VJ Duke August 31, 2015 at 20:12

        *laughing lots* Nah, it’s me. I’m just messing with you. Originally, this professor kept his identity a secret, see.

  11. 91 Nicholas Warren--MPS staff member August 28, 2015 at 12:32

    The only good thing about pigs…is bacon!

    • 92 Professor VJ Duke August 28, 2015 at 13:01

      Not even the eyes?

    • 93 Susan P August 28, 2015 at 15:25

      You’ve just offended Babe.

      • 94 Anthony Carrola August 29, 2015 at 14:29

        That’s okay–Babe tastes too god for me to care about his feelings.

      • 95 Susan P August 31, 2015 at 20:41

        How about the chickens feelings?

  12. 96 PorterGirl August 28, 2015 at 12:26

    !!!!!! It was sooooo worth the wait. It really was. Do you know, through the video I was thinking ‘that’s a nice piece of furniture just there’ and then look what you did right at the end! My hat is off, sir! Well and truly off I say. Possibly my shoes too, although I am not sure of the significance of that.

    • 97 Professor VJ Duke August 28, 2015 at 13:01

      Thanks bunches, Lucy! *laughing* Well, the shoes and hat are still both a good thing when put together. *bows* Now, that machine is a sewing machine, can you believe! My grandmother made many a quilt on it, I think. Though I could be wrong. Didn’t you love that sunscreen? I wrote that myself!

      • 98 PorterGirl August 28, 2015 at 13:10

        A sewing machine! That’s wonderful and fabulous that is has made a star appearance. It was almost the first thing I noticed, in fact. I bet the quilts were just super. How very clever of you! (The Guys are over the moon that part of the track is especially for them, you know)

      • 99 Professor VJ Duke August 31, 2015 at 19:42

        Was it? Very coolio. Yes, that machine is something. It’s a real looker, I say. The quilts are very warm and sweet! (*laughing lots* Are they? The buggers!)

      • 100 PorterGirl September 1, 2015 at 06:22

        It is simply super. I bet Terry would love those quilts – he would curl up and never get up! (The buggers! Especially as they know Brahms is my favourite)

      • 101 Professor VJ Duke September 1, 2015 at 11:46

        I’m sure he would! He’d get lost in the quilts. But I do that, too, so it’s only fair. (Buggers indeed!! You should give them all a spanking.)

      • 102 PorterGirl September 1, 2015 at 11:49

        He would love than. In fact, I would quite like to get lost in quilts myself. Let’s all get lost in quilts!

      • 103 Professor VJ Duke September 1, 2015 at 21:26

        Let’s do it. I imagine that’d be so fun. I’d never come out either.

      • 104 PorterGirl September 2, 2015 at 06:09

        Me either. Let’s put them in the guitar beds and just stay there.

      • 105 Professor VJ Duke September 2, 2015 at 18:47

        Yes, let’s do it at once. I bet there’s worms in the guitar beds.

      • 106 PorterGirl September 3, 2015 at 06:10

        Eeek! I’m sending Terry in first to clear them out. I don’t want little wriggly things disturbing my slumber.

      • 107 Professor VJ Duke September 3, 2015 at 12:52

        Yes, he’ll fetch them. Let’s get some flytraps, too.

      • 108 PorterGirl September 3, 2015 at 13:25

        Good idea. And a snake catcher, just in case.

      • 109 Professor VJ Duke September 3, 2015 at 23:02

        For sure. We don’t want any snakes in there.

      • 110 PorterGirl September 4, 2015 at 06:45

        Absolutely not. They would play havoc with the acoustics, not to mention taking up most of the quilts.

      • 111 Professor VJ Duke September 4, 2015 at 12:15

        Especially if they take to eating the wood. I wonder if snakes eat wood now.

      • 112 PorterGirl September 4, 2015 at 12:48

        I think snakes eat… people! Or maybe just mice. Terry will go crazy if they try to eat his mice!

      • 113 Professor VJ Duke September 4, 2015 at 19:51

        And he should! After all, that is his private army, not theirs. Snakes are buggers, I’ve decided.

      • 114 PorterGirl September 5, 2015 at 10:06

        Quite! They are absolute buggers. I am going to make belts out of them.

      • 115 Professor VJ Duke September 7, 2015 at 15:28

        *laughs* You must send one to me as well! I’d love a snake belt.

      • 116 PorterGirl September 8, 2015 at 06:16

        I shall send you two, in fact. A red one and a black one. Well, it depends what colour snakes I catch I suppose!

      • 117 Professor VJ Duke September 8, 2015 at 12:50

        The colors are awesome! If you get a coral snake (I think it is) it’ll be a red and black belt!

      • 118 PorterGirl September 8, 2015 at 13:20

        I shall hunt one down especially!

      • 119 Professor VJ Duke September 9, 2015 at 12:52

        Be careful! Very deadly poisonous, I hear.

      • 120 PorterGirl September 10, 2015 at 06:26

        Goodness! I shall wear gloves, in that case.

      • 121 Professor VJ Duke September 10, 2015 at 12:55

        Yes, definitely do. And bring a stick.

      • 122 PorterGirl September 10, 2015 at 13:16

        Yes. A big, pointy one.

      • 123 Professor VJ Duke September 11, 2015 at 12:22

        Yes. And make it red.

      • 124 PorterGirl September 11, 2015 at 12:29

        Good idea.

      • 125 Professor VJ Duke September 11, 2015 at 12:40

        It will be fearsome.

    • 126 Susan P August 28, 2015 at 15:25

      You are giving him your bowler?

      • 127 PorterGirl August 28, 2015 at 15:32

        I doubt he would want it with all my girl sweat in it :) But I guess I do owe him a hat…

      • 128 Susan P August 28, 2015 at 15:33

        Indeed you do! I’d love to see him in a bowler, though.

      • 129 PorterGirl August 29, 2015 at 06:52

        I think he would look very dashing indeed!

      • 130 Susan P August 29, 2015 at 12:44

        Spiffy!

      • 131 Professor VJ Duke August 31, 2015 at 19:56

        Like a beast!

      • 132 Susan P August 31, 2015 at 20:46

        A dragon beast.

      • 133 Professor VJ Duke September 1, 2015 at 11:45

        With a bow tie.


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