So, I like cookies a bit.
Especially cherry cookies.
Wait. I lie.
I’ve never had a cherry cookie, have you?
Exactly right! They don’t exist. Or, at least, they seem not to.
Professor’s Newest Theory: Cherry Cookies do not exist.
So, I tested the theory and went into a local bakery.
Now, I must say the bakery was rather full. And packed. And busy. It was rather full, see.
“Excuse me!” I shouted over the din.
No answer for a little bits.
“Excuse me a few times!”
You’d be surprised, but that worked. The people in front of me turned around, and I got to the front.
A fat woman was at the register.
“What would you like?” she asked, grabbing that little plastic paper thingy they have to use to grab cookies with.
“I’d like–” I began, but she cut me off.
“A lemon custard cookie? Sure thing.”
And faster than a rabbit on drugs, faster than Muhammed on the back of an ass, faster than Brock Lesnar…
…faster than ever, she grabbed a lemon custard cookie and handed it to me.
“Very nice,” I said, pushing her hand and the cookie aside, “but I wasn’t looking for that.”
Her face fell. “What? What do you want, then?”
“I’ll take…” I’d quite forgotten what I came in for, the sudden.
“Hey, buddy,” a voice said behind me. “Hurry up, I want a cookie.”
I did the only decent thing one can do in such a situation: I took the lemon custard cookie from the woman and gave it to him.
“Now, see here,” I said to the lady, “do you have cherry cookies?”
And she gave me one.
I was astounded.
PF, cherry cookies exist.
Let’s have a dance to celebrate.