Creeping Along…

When you’re creeping around in someone’s home at night uninvited, there’s a word for it: Creeper.

~ V. Shnodgrate, Renowned PL Poet

UntitledSo, the professor did what any regular beetle might do: I crept along after the two fellows sneaking about.

Now, we must get something out in front and corrected immediately: Just because this professor was creeping, it does not make him either creepy or a creeper.

Niceness. And moving on.

The two fellows were obviously trying to be silent as they made their way up the stairs.

This professor followed along, as silent as a worm’s battle-cry.


The Announcement Party Guests were all about gone. In a few huffs, too, since the announcement from Prince Beef was so short and there was no dessert.

Now, upstairs, it was completely dark and black. You couldn’t see to see, you know, you know…

Once at the top of the stairs, the two fellows veered off to the right, and stopped in front of a door.

They opened the door and went inside. One of them clicked on a flashlight, too.

This put the professor in a deadly, dadblaming position. I couldn’t go in, or the fellows would see me, and my spying gig would be busted.

I could stay out in the hallway…but I risked being seen by whoever came up the stairs. If they came up the stairs. From experience, I find Mr. or Mrs. Whoever to be rather inconsistent, you better know.

A real humdinger.


I decided to go in.

Wrong choice.


It was Schwarz Tauptinker and Bud Parker.

“Bud,” Parker said, “why are you following us?”

“Yeah,” Schwarz said. “I mean…why? I really don’t know.”

“Well, look here,” I began, “I was coming up to use the bathroom and–”

“Nah,” Schwarz said, shaking his head, “I don’t believe you…even a little bit.”

But there was not more time for words.

At that minute, voices could be heard approaching. A few Mr. or Mrs. Whoevers were coming our way.

Schwarz, Parker, and I all hid in the room as fast as we could.

And we did it just in time, too.

Right before the lights clicked on.

PL Symbol


69 Responses to “Creeping Along…”

  1. 1 sweetaces December 2, 2015 at 13:22

    Sneaky men. Isn’t that your house PVJ… don’t be creeping with those men..its creeper than you think…Besides. .what happened next..?

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke December 2, 2015 at 20:34

      Well, I fear I got captured, can you believe? It’s awful. You must come bust me out.

      • 3 sweetaces December 2, 2015 at 22:34

        With two other men…hmmmph am sure they would take care of you. No ransom mentioned PVJ..don’t fret.

      • 4 Professor VJ Duke December 3, 2015 at 14:48

        Oh, no one would offer money for me, I fear. Maybe cherry suckers.

      • 5 sweetaces December 3, 2015 at 15:42

        Well I would…If you promise to be nice. I have some few squeezed papers. Tommy my imaginery cat said it would make do. What say you good sir?

      • 6 Professor VJ Duke December 4, 2015 at 19:52

        That sounds brilliant! Of course I’d be nice. Aren’t I always nice?

      • 7 sweetaces December 5, 2015 at 08:49

        That’s a fact am yet to be seen proven

      • 8 Professor VJ Duke December 10, 2015 at 14:22

        Very good point.

  2. 9 Nancy Loderick November 18, 2015 at 21:33

    Ah Professor,

    We anxiously await hearing what happens next!


    • 10 Professor VJ Duke November 18, 2015 at 21:48

      It’s going to be a bit scary, I should say!

  3. 11 Simply Skeptical November 14, 2015 at 13:18

    What happened next? You never finish and leave me wondering and wondering? Must I use my dull imagination again?

    • 12 Professor VJ Duke November 15, 2015 at 00:28

      No, no. I shall tell you, my good sir.

  4. 13 Debbie November 14, 2015 at 00:31

    I’m guessing you must have been in a bedroom. If so, did you hide in the closet, or under the bed? Regardless, you’re going to be spotted, you know. Schwarz alone will see to that!

    Worm’s battle cry?? I’m still laughing! Worms aren’t wicked, and I’ve never known one to attack!

    • 14 Professor VJ Duke November 15, 2015 at 00:28

      You think Schwarz will see me? He will not! *hides better*

      *laughs* A worm’s never attacked you?!

  5. 15 jeanixAngel November 13, 2015 at 22:57

    It’s a bag-pack of suspense, humor, and adventure… Worm’s crazy laughs at this moment… And again, professor has another emergency involvement in villainy, (I hope it isn’t).

    • 16 Professor VJ Duke November 15, 2015 at 00:27

      Do you think I”m wicked? I try to be nice, you know. It’s just a struggle. A worm’s laugh! It’s something, you know.

      • 17 jeanixAngel November 15, 2015 at 01:06

        * laughs… :D

      • 18 Professor VJ Duke November 16, 2015 at 14:49


  6. 19 John W. Howell November 13, 2015 at 21:39

    Given the powder room in the entry way I think the bathroom story had some holes in it. Ah well remain calm and beetle on.

    • 20 Professor VJ Duke November 15, 2015 at 00:26

      And beetle on! *laughing lots* I love that. Yes, sir, I shall beetle on. That’s so inspired, you know. Now, you don’t think I’m a creeper, do you?

      • 21 John W. Howell November 15, 2015 at 12:06

        When you adopt the beetle way you automatically become a creeper.

      • 22 Professor VJ Duke November 16, 2015 at 14:52

        But do you suppose all beetles creep?

  7. 23 L. Marie November 13, 2015 at 19:54

    I didn’t know you were back to posting. I checked on the off chance. Just returned from taking care of my mom during her surgery. I see I’ve missed some posts. Will have to work backward.

    • 24 Professor VJ Duke November 15, 2015 at 00:24

      Hey, Linda! Yes, I’ve got a schedule going now. How’s your mom doing?

  8. 25 desertdweller29 November 13, 2015 at 19:47

    This post was creepy. *laughs wickedly*

    • 26 Professor VJ Duke November 15, 2015 at 00:24

      *taps fingers* Now you’re calling me creepy!

      • 27 desertdweller29 November 15, 2015 at 05:17

        Never! The POST was creepy. The Professor is awesome.

      • 28 Professor VJ Duke November 16, 2015 at 14:49

        The professor is a beetle and you know it!

  9. 29 HotBottoms November 13, 2015 at 19:08

    Laughing silently-like a mouse pissing on cotton. (Which was my favorite “silent” metaphor until this whole worm thing…)

    • 30 Professor VJ Duke November 15, 2015 at 00:23

      Now, what a thing! I’ve never heard of that one. *laughs*

  10. 31 sonmi upon the Cloud November 13, 2015 at 18:30

    “Just because this professor was creeping, it does not make him either creepy or a creeper.” – How about crepey? Are you crepey Professor?!

    – sonmi the smooth upon the Cloud

    • 32 Professor VJ Duke November 15, 2015 at 00:23

      Now, Sonmi, what is a crepey?

  11. 33 Heartafire November 13, 2015 at 16:46

    PorterGirl and I were impressed with the worm’s battle cry. Laughing so hard.
    Why am I having trouble following, should I be in the special class? Who married who and do you creep often?

    • 34 Professor VJ Duke November 13, 2015 at 16:52

      Don’t you suppose worm’s have a battle-cry? I mean, we can never hear them, of course.

      Well, PB wants to marry someone named Gertrude. The party was a bust, see.

      I don’t creep at all! I’m a beetle. We don’t creep.

      • 35 Heartafire November 13, 2015 at 16:56

        I think I heard the haunting cry of the worm’s battle cry, it will stay with me forever. No one should marry Gertrude (sorry Gertrude) it’s just not done. I don’t know how to creep, is it something like the electric glide.

      • 36 Professor VJ Duke November 15, 2015 at 00:15

        Creeping is hard. I don’t know the secret either, I must admit. Now, why shouldn’t anyone marry Gertrude, pray?

      • 37 Heartafire November 15, 2015 at 01:17

        uh, because her name is Gertrude…I hope that’s not your Mom’s name. If so, 40 lashes with wet noodle for me.

      • 38 Professor VJ Duke November 16, 2015 at 14:49

        *laughing lots* It is not, I assure you. It is a horrid name, I agree.

  12. 39 FictionFan November 13, 2015 at 15:50

    See how brilliant my Schwarzy is? He saw right through your cover story! What a man! *swoons*

    • 40 Professor VJ Duke November 13, 2015 at 16:51

      *laughs* He did, didn’t he? I don’t think he even thought about it for a second. But what are they up to? That’s the question, see.

      • 41 FictionFan November 13, 2015 at 18:29

        Lightning brain, see? I suspect they’re trying to escape before the ship goes down… perhaps they should stand at the prow and sing…

      • 42 Professor VJ Duke November 15, 2015 at 00:23

        *laughs* Ew! Don’t remind me of that horrid movie. I think I might have kicked them off, see.

      • 43 FictionFan November 15, 2015 at 19:41

        I wish you had! But at the beginning of the movie – not the end…

      • 44 Professor VJ Duke November 16, 2015 at 15:00

        Better movie: Fast and Furious 6.

      • 45 FictionFan November 16, 2015 at 20:11

        Hmm… suddenly Titanic sounds a bit better…

      • 46 Professor VJ Duke November 17, 2015 at 14:04

        Oh rats! That’s an awesome movie!!

  13. 47 Lady Dunamis November 13, 2015 at 14:22

    I think you are a closet creeper who subconsciously wants us to know this. I believe you are a creeper….creeper

    • 48 Professor VJ Duke November 13, 2015 at 16:50

      Lady! The poor professor couldn’t be a creeper! How wicked of you. I’m too…proper for that sort of thing.

      • 49 Lady Dunamis November 13, 2015 at 17:18

        Oh I get it. You are a proper creeper.

        And now I am wicked because I speak the truth?! This…is…Punchy….Land madness! (in a king Leonides voice) 😂

      • 50 Professor VJ Duke November 15, 2015 at 00:18

        *laughs* I’ve never creeped in my whole long life!

        Now that was impressive. The Leonides voice. You’ve scared me, in fact.

  14. 51 PorterGirl November 13, 2015 at 13:48

    As silent as a worm’s battle cry! I like that very much indeed. But who turned the lights on?? The suspense is too much for me, Professor.

    • 52 Professor VJ Duke November 13, 2015 at 16:50

      You know, now that I think on it, see, I’ve never heard a worm’s battle-cry. *laughs* Wicked people did! I hope my hiding place is a good one.

      • 53 PorterGirl November 13, 2015 at 17:05

        That just goes to show how silent it is. I can picture a tiny little worm mouth opened up in fury – and no sound at all coming out! Aha – good way to find out which end it which as you can’t do a battle cry out of your bottom… or CAN you? *laughing lots*
        I suspect it might not be quite good enough… but that’s what makes it exciting.

      • 54 Professor VJ Duke November 15, 2015 at 00:17

        *laughing lots* What a thought! Upon closer inspection, maybe you can do a battle cry from down…under! Goodness. That’s a wonder. Now I”m wondering which cry is more powerful?

        I’ll get caught, then!

      • 55 PorterGirl November 15, 2015 at 11:08

        *laughing so much* a battle cry from… down under would be hard to ignore, I am thinking!

      • 56 Professor VJ Duke November 16, 2015 at 14:52

        *laughing lots* I think you could be right! Goodness.

      • 57 PorterGirl November 16, 2015 at 15:33

        *practices down-below battle cry*

      • 58 Professor VJ Duke November 17, 2015 at 14:01

        *laughing* Practicing it? Wow!

      • 59 PorterGirl November 17, 2015 at 14:37

        I’ve mastered it now, so… watch out! *laughs*

      • 60 Professor VJ Duke November 17, 2015 at 21:35

        Mastered it that fast? I don’t believe you, the sudden!

      • 61 PorterGirl November 18, 2015 at 07:11

        I *might* have been a master of it beforehand… but didn’t want to admit it out loud.

      • 62 Professor VJ Duke November 18, 2015 at 21:36

        *laughing lots* I’ll have to ask your Nan.

      • 63 PorterGirl November 19, 2015 at 09:42

        Just don’t ask my Mum.

      • 64 Professor VJ Duke November 20, 2015 at 14:37

        Hmm…I might, of course.

      • 65 PorterGirl November 20, 2015 at 15:35


      • 66 Professor VJ Duke November 22, 2015 at 18:59

        *laughs* I win.

      • 67 PorterGirl November 22, 2015 at 19:44

        You always win! Pah.

      • 68 Professor VJ Duke November 23, 2015 at 16:29

        *laughs* I’m like Hector that way. But he did lose to Achilles, hmm.

      • 69 PorterGirl November 23, 2015 at 16:37

        Yes so you watch out… I could be Achilles in disguise *nods*

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