The Evolutionary Journey of the Grape

professor speaks

Okay, so the professor has a stumper today.

Once I tell you what it is, you will be as shocked as I was when I first learned about it.

It’s the sort of thing that messes with your brain once you have thinks on it.

So, here’s a grape:

9071_1196Here’s a grapefruit:

Ripe appetizing grapefruit with leaf. Macro isolated over white.

So, now, this professors asks you: Do these two fruits share anything in common but a name? Is there any reason why the fruit of the grape is larger, pinker, oranger, and more attractive than the grape itself? Why does it have an outer shell?

Now, I must needs present a theory: The Evolutionary Journey of the Grape.

First, there was a grape.

9071_1196

His name was Larry, but that’s not important.

Then, one day, Larry blushed and became this:

cherry1

Larry then had a family.

Unknown

However, here’s the thing, at this point, Larry was quite defenseless, see. Even the worm could kill him.

So, he grew bigger.

Larry, in his prime.

Larry, in his prime.

But even this didn’t save him from the worms.

Beaten and bruised.

Beaten and bruised.

So, Larry grew a tough outer, pink/orange coat. The lowly grape, Larry, had had it’s fruit.

Larry.

Larry.

Now, this professor thinks this is a rather good theory. But we must keep in mind that all grapes did not take this evolutionary path.

For instance, Giselle, just decided to evolve legs and run from the worms.

Giselle, without make-up.

Giselle, without make-up.

Yo. Fetched.

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167 Responses to “The Evolutionary Journey of the Grape”


  1. 1 Louis from VA January 14, 2016 at 13:58

    *suspiciously eyes grapes in fridge*

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2016 at 13:18

      Throw them out!

  2. 3 Susan P January 13, 2016 at 00:29

    Larry is a cucumber. See? that is the problem.

    • 4 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 13:56

      Oh, that’s right. Did the grape steal the name?

      • 5 Susan P January 13, 2016 at 14:51

        I think that is simplistic. I’m certain that DS and his henchmen are involved.

      • 6 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 23:47

        Probably so. Seems like something DS might do, huh?

  3. 7 Simply Skeptical January 13, 2016 at 00:25

    Is that an engorged tick!!! How sick is that??? Whoa grossed out here…

    • 8 Simply Skeptical January 13, 2016 at 00:29

      And to think I used to like grapes. Ignorance is not so blissful afterall. yuck, yuck, yuck….

      • 9 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 13:56

        Lots of protein in grapes, the sudden.

    • 10 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 13:55

      *laughs* It is…a grape, mind your manners!

  4. 11 John W. Howell January 13, 2016 at 00:22

    I could see reaching for Giselle and then seeing those legs. Fly swatter time.

    • 12 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 13:55

      *laughs* But what about when she squishes and all that…stuff…inside goes everywhere?

      • 13 John W. Howell January 13, 2016 at 14:13

        EEK

      • 14 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 23:38

        Time for the sweeper.

      • 15 John W. Howell January 14, 2016 at 00:46

        And a white bag

      • 16 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2016 at 13:08

        And soap and bubbles.

      • 17 John W. Howell January 15, 2016 at 13:36

        Uh okay.

      • 18 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2016 at 19:20

        Well you would need soap, and bubbles come with soap.

      • 19 John W. Howell January 17, 2016 at 20:23

        I get it.

  5. 20 walt walker January 12, 2016 at 23:03

    I don’t like that Giselle as much as the one married to Tom Brady.

    • 21 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 13:54

      Ah, Tom Brady–now that you bring him up–shall win the SuperBowl, you know. Well, both are a bit weird looking, that’s what I think.

      • 22 walt walker January 13, 2016 at 14:31

        I hope he does win. He’s rather dashing.

      • 23 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 23:44

        Your a Pats fan! *celebrates*

  6. 24 Lady Dunamis January 12, 2016 at 21:03

    Dude, that Apple gave me the creeps!😣

    • 25 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 13:54

      Now just imagine if you were starving and had to eat it…

      • 26 Lady Dunamis January 13, 2016 at 13:59

        U sir are cruel and unusual 😝

      • 27 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 14:09

        I’m the cruelest man alive today, don’t you know. Still deserve a halo, though.

      • 28 Lady Dunamis January 13, 2016 at 14:12

        😈

      • 29 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 23:38

        ==[:-{)==

  7. 30 Heartafire January 12, 2016 at 20:21

    I’m glad I came here today. I am writing this down, I am big on evolution. I never want to see Giselle again.

    • 31 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 13:53

      Hollie! So do you suppose it’s a scientific fact now? I bet so. Poor Giselle. So mean to her, just like you are to Toby! Is it the name?

      • 32 Heartafire January 13, 2016 at 14:20

        Actually it’s the legs.

      • 33 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 23:41

        Those little legs? Come now!

      • 34 Heartafire January 14, 2016 at 01:09

        Yikes!

      • 35 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2016 at 13:09

        Double yikes!

      • 36 Heartafire January 13, 2016 at 14:23

        oh,yes! it is a scientific fact for sure! Bravo! slowly moves head side to side in amazement.

      • 37 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 23:43

        I think you’re laughing me to scorn!

      • 38 Heartafire January 14, 2016 at 01:00

        Dear. Professor I would never mock. I am usually the mockee :-)

      • 39 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2016 at 13:08

        Don’t let people mock you! throw socks at them first.

      • 40 Heartafire January 15, 2016 at 14:24

        that’s why they mock me!

      • 41 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2016 at 19:23

        Aha! I”ll give you some old socks to fight back with.

      • 42 Heartafire January 17, 2016 at 20:17

        i never imagined the professor having any “old socks”.

      • 43 Professor VJ Duke January 18, 2016 at 20:03

        Well, I don’t exactly throw them all away. Once they get holes, I put them in this bag. For sock wars, see.

      • 44 Heartafire January 18, 2016 at 20:10

        Being socked by the side of the head is unpleasant but beats a sock full of rocks.

      • 45 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2016 at 13:57

        A sock full of rocks is deadly, I say.

      • 46 Heartafire January 19, 2016 at 14:02

        A must have on the streets of mean Miami…:)

      • 47 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2016 at 14:03

        Is it warm in Miami at the minute?

      • 48 Heartafire January 19, 2016 at 14:05

        Actually, it’s a chilly 45 degrees…brrrr.

      • 49 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2016 at 21:25

        What?! That’s it? It’s single digits here!!

      • 50 Heartafire January 19, 2016 at 21:28

        Ohhh, I hope you are wearing a double pair of argyles. I haven’t seen that since…well I haven’t seen that!

      • 51 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2016 at 21:39

        What is an argyle?

      • 52 Heartafire January 19, 2016 at 21:41

        “a pattern composed of diamonds of various colors on a plain background, used in knitted garments such as sweaters and socks”. Compliments of google. :)

      • 53 Professor VJ Duke January 20, 2016 at 13:08

        Wow. I like diamonds. But it’s sounding somewhat girly, the sudden.

      • 54 Heartafire January 20, 2016 at 15:22

        Not at all! it’s a man thing, for the very discerning dresser!

      • 55 Professor VJ Duke January 21, 2016 at 15:01

        Maybe…but not professorish!

      • 56 Heartafire January 21, 2016 at 17:34

        How about a nice pair of woolen socks and loafers? Khaki slacks, herringbone jacket with elbow patches…oversized sunglasses, are you feeling this?

      • 57 Professor VJ Duke January 22, 2016 at 14:57

        I am! Aviator sunglasses. I dig, I dig. I’ll look famous!

      • 58 Heartafire January 22, 2016 at 15:17

        Aviators, yes! Maybe a neck scarf, wool, black! It is cold…

      • 59 Professor VJ Duke January 22, 2016 at 21:28

        Oh yeah. Now I’m looking like a secret agent.

      • 60 Heartafire January 22, 2016 at 23:34

        I want to be your wardrobe manager, I will need limitless funds cause these items aren’t cheap…of course there’s the grab and run, but that’s not our style. Is it?

      • 61 Professor VJ Duke January 25, 2016 at 14:15

        Oh no. Especially not if I tour, so yes, you can be, if you like. But don’t do anything too outlandish, see.

      • 62 Heartafire January 25, 2016 at 14:43

        outlandish…certainly not! ;)

      • 63 Professor VJ Duke January 26, 2016 at 13:25

        *sigh of relief*

      • 64 Heartafire January 19, 2016 at 14:03

        or is that the mean streets. And I call myself a writer, tsk.

      • 65 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2016 at 14:03

        *laughs* I do that sort of thing all the time.

      • 66 Heartafire January 19, 2016 at 14:06

        mean streets, dirty streets, …some kind of streets.

      • 67 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2016 at 21:25

        Golden ones?

      • 68 Heartafire January 19, 2016 at 21:27

        Always the shining light in the darkness! Bravo!

      • 69 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2016 at 21:38

        That’s a stars job, I’m thinking. I’m more like a piece of coal.

      • 70 Heartafire January 19, 2016 at 21:42

        kind of like what I got for Christmas?

      • 71 Professor VJ Duke January 20, 2016 at 13:09

        *laughing lots* Okay, that does it. We set a trap for Santa this year.

      • 72 Heartafire January 20, 2016 at 15:17

        I think I was hit by the Krampus!

      • 73 Professor VJ Duke January 21, 2016 at 15:01

        No! What happened?

      • 74 Heartafire January 21, 2016 at 17:35

        I got coal in my stocking at Christmas!

      • 75 Professor VJ Duke January 22, 2016 at 14:58

        Oh dear me. We’ll have to kill Krampus and SC next year.

      • 76 Heartafire January 22, 2016 at 15:01

        My mind is awhirl with ideas on how to accomplish this overdue mission! I haven’t ruled out the katana.

      • 77 Professor VJ Duke January 22, 2016 at 21:23

        Never rule out the katana, I say. It’s such a beautiful thing, really, see.

      • 78 Heartafire January 22, 2016 at 23:36

        I don’t think SC or Krampus is coming to see us!! We are evil.

      • 79 Professor VJ Duke January 25, 2016 at 14:16

        But the Krampus comes when one is wicked!

      • 80 Heartafire January 25, 2016 at 14:43

        I will be prepared for him this time!

  8. 81 Jackie January 12, 2016 at 20:12

    Wowawee! Not that’s a humdinger of a theory!!

    • 82 Jackie January 12, 2016 at 20:13

      Dadblamit! I meant to write Now instead of not.

    • 83 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 13:51

      It is! Do you suppose it’s proven and a scientific law now?

      • 84 Jackie January 13, 2016 at 18:12

        It seems like it should be!

      • 85 Professor VJ Duke January 14, 2016 at 00:04

        Let’s vote for it–five times.

      • 86 Jackie January 14, 2016 at 00:19

        Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes
        You’ve got my votes!

      • 87 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2016 at 13:07

        *laughs* Yes! I think I”ve already one, the sudden.

      • 88 Jackie January 15, 2016 at 14:20

        Well you have all five of mine in case I am not available when things are made official. Or something to that effect.

      • 89 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2016 at 19:23

        Five will be awesome. This is going great already.

  9. 90 Haylee January 12, 2016 at 16:50

    Love!
    If there’s ever an opening for a science teacher at my school, I’m putting your name forward as a possible candidate :)

    • 91 Professor VJ Duke January 12, 2016 at 19:23

      Haylee! Yes, please put my name up. Do you think they’d hire me? I mean, this is a remarkable theory after all.

      • 92 Haylee January 12, 2016 at 19:55

        They employed me, so anything is possible!
        I wouldn’t advise putting this theory forward in an interview though, not until you’ve signed on the dotted line – if this was the 14th century, they’d be very much in ‘the world is flat’ camp!

      • 93 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 13:50

        *laughing* Very particular, are they? Then again, I’m sure they recognized you were an awesome teacher. Even if you won’t give StarWars spoilers.

      • 94 Haylee January 13, 2016 at 16:00

        Let’s just say they’re not ‘think outside the box’ peeps.
        Aww thank you ☺️ I’ve been known to threaten spoilers in exchange for good behaviour – clearly wouldn’t work with you, I imagine naughtiness would increase tenfold!

      • 95 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 23:53

        *laughing* Yeah, I might threaten more wickedness if I don’t get my spoilers! No one will tell me, can you believe?! It’s all backwards, I tell you.

  10. 96 Sonya Solomonovich January 12, 2016 at 15:57

    Now this is the kind of theory I like! It’s explained in a way that makes sense. Could the professor explain the theory of relativity as well?
    By the way, I don’t think Giselle would benefit much from the use of makeup, but she does have a pretty name so she must be content with that.

    • 97 Professor VJ Duke January 12, 2016 at 19:22

      Oh goodness me. I can try, if you like. Would you like me too, madam? *nervous*

      Really? Rats. I had such high hopes. That’s true. The name is stellar, for sure. We could always give her a mask? But I can’t seem to locate her face, alas.

  11. 98 tanazmasaba January 12, 2016 at 14:32

    That is a steller theory of evolution Professor! I feel sorry for poor Giselle though.

    • 99 Professor VJ Duke January 12, 2016 at 19:20

      *laughs* Thank you bunches! You know, I do as well. Is there anything we can do for her, do you suppose?

      • 100 tanazmasaba January 13, 2016 at 03:11

        Perhaps maybe rewrite her story? Then again she’s still a survivor–she did grow legs to run away from them worms!

      • 101 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 14:07

        *laughing* So very true! It’s quite impressive. Don’t you wish you could grow extra legs? Imagine how fastly fast you could run!

      • 102 tanazmasaba January 13, 2016 at 17:28

        Imagine if I had wings 😎

      • 103 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 23:58

        Ooo! Very cool. What would you do? I’d fly about and attack people.

  12. 104 L. Marie January 12, 2016 at 14:30

    Giselle looks like an olive. Care to write the evolution of the olive next?
    This was wonderful, by the way! I can’t blame Larry for evolving. Survival of the fittest!

    • 105 Professor VJ Duke January 12, 2016 at 19:20

      The olive! Now that’d be quite interesting. For instance, how did that red thing get inside the olive? It’s a mystery and a wonder. Giselle does, poor thing.

      That’s the ticket. That’s why the professor doesn’t survive, see.

  13. 106 Amanda Lyle January 12, 2016 at 14:25

    Haha. The most random thing I’ve read all day. Y’know, I’ve never really thought all that much about it, but I think you might be onto something!

    Geez… Giselle hasn’t aged well, has she?

    • 107 Professor VJ Duke January 12, 2016 at 19:19

      Isn’t it a thing? See, when you stop and think on it, it makes complete sense. I actually might not eat grapes now, don’t you know.

      *shakes head* Not at all. Do you suppose some makeup might help?

      • 108 Amanda Lyle January 12, 2016 at 19:48

        Haha… Never underestimate the power of good makeup!

      • 109 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 13:49

        I know! If guys wore makeup, I’d do some, just so I could disguise myself. That’d be awesome. I’d be like a total spy, then.

  14. 110 FictionFan January 12, 2016 at 14:20

    Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!

    • 111 FictionFan January 12, 2016 at 14:24

      PS Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!

      The thing is though – is Larry finished evolving? Or will he eventually get bigger and oranger and bigger and oranger and one day turn into… a spacehopper?!?

      Now Giselle is rather lovely, you must admit! Kinda how I think of Clara only with better hair. I don’t think it’s very polite to call Tick Gorged though… I’m sure he eats quite sensibly really…

      • 112 Professor VJ Duke January 12, 2016 at 19:18

        Ooo, what a good question. He might evolve even further. That’d be such a wonder. But…what is a spacehopper? Are they orange? Do they have legs? I’d like to be one, I think. The name is cool.

        *laughs* That is how you’d picture Clara, you mean thing! *laughs even more* Tick! Ooo…did I say that?

      • 113 FictionFan January 13, 2016 at 00:47

        Big bouncy thing? My ancient Christmas present? You bouncing round your house on one? Mine was orange – with a face! It looked a lot like Larry actually, only with horns growing out of his head…

        If only you would imagine her like that too – you’d be so much safer from her womanly wiles! Unless you find Giselle attractive, of course… *quizzical eyebrow* *laughs* Yes, you did! Don’t try the innocent act on me, sir!

      • 114 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 13:57

        Oh, that’s right!!! Of course I remembered, really. I was just testing you, for the the fun of it. Goodness. Yes, I see what you mean now. But I didn’t know you called your big bouncy thing Larry. Capital, I say.

        Well, of course no womanly wiles work on this professor. I’m so in defense mode, nothing works, haha. Victory. Well, I didn’t really mean that, you know!

      • 115 FictionFan January 13, 2016 at 18:01

        Uh-huh! I shall set my spacehopper on you, if you’re not careful! D’you know, I can’t remember what I called him – I feel so bad about that now! I bet he’s never forgotten me, wherever he’s bounced off to. *weeps a little*

        Oh, you don’t have any defences – you’re putty in the hands of any girl who flutters her eyelashes at you! That’s why you need protection! *growls ferociously* Do I believe you, though?

      • 116 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 23:59

        *laughs* Well, did you really have a name for him? Just make one up! I’m sure he won’t mind a bit. How about Rafa George?

        But…but…you don’t know that, for sure! Girls are weird, how they attack, see. Of course you do!!

      • 117 FictionFan January 14, 2016 at 12:19

        I can’t call him that because my bike was called George! And Rafa isn’t orange. I shall call him… VJ!

        I do! For sure and definite! I won’t list them all though – your blog would run out of memory. Girls are superior warriors in the battlefields of love, though – I’m glad you’ve learned that! Hmm…

      • 118 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2016 at 13:14

        But VJ isn’t orange! Rafa sorta is orange, if you think on it.

        Hey, I think I lose on the battlefields of love all the time. You need to get out there and pitch a bit for me, don’t you know. And hurry, too.

      • 119 FictionFan January 15, 2016 at 18:47

        *laughs* OK, true – but you do bounce! He is not!!! He’s… he’s… golden!

        Stick with the battlefield of music, I say, or if you must, the battlefield of sport! I most certainly shall not help you, sir – you are quite fickle enough without any assistance from me! *growls*

      • 120 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2016 at 19:30

        Haha…a little, maybe? He is not! Selena will beat him, the sudden.

        But I lose there, too! *remembers competitions in the past and shudders* Now, why did you say that about sports? I want to be an athlete…

      • 121 FictionFan January 18, 2016 at 16:55

        ‘Tis your jealousy that’s affecting your eyesight! Only if he was using a badminton racquet…

        Oh, you never lose on the musical battlefield! Just the judges get the decision wrong sometimes… You’re too old to become an athlete, I’m afraid. You’re already on the slippery slope down to decrepitude and infirmity. I’m so glad I don’t age!

      • 122 Professor VJ Duke January 18, 2016 at 20:09

        *gets a microscope* Now I can see! *laughs* I’m being ripped again!!

        Judges usually hate me. They can be such beasts, it is true. Too old? Rats. I want to play football. With Edelman.

      • 123 FictionFan January 19, 2016 at 00:59

        Ooh, a microscopic examination of Rafa! *daydreams*

        *nods* They’re understandably jealous! Way too old! Though the idea of the Professor in a dinky little football outfit has a certain appeal… *daydreams*

      • 124 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2016 at 14:01

        *laughing* Ugh! Who would want that? Don’t answer that!

        Way too old! *nods* Well, that would be a thing! I think my number would be…82!

      • 125 FictionFan January 19, 2016 at 16:09

        *laughs* OK, I won’t! *thinks about it though*

        84 by now, sir! You should never fib about your age! *sanctimonious face*

      • 126 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2016 at 21:34

        Hey! That’s so cheating, young lady!

        Goodness, you’re right. I’m going to be so old in two months! *bangs head*

      • 127 FictionFan January 19, 2016 at 23:31

        *nods* Older than me!!

      • 128 Professor VJ Duke January 20, 2016 at 13:24

        And BUS.

      • 129 FictionFan January 20, 2016 at 17:34

        Nobody’s older than BUS…

      • 130 Professor VJ Duke January 21, 2016 at 15:05

        Poor BUS. You be nice!

    • 131 Professor VJ Duke January 12, 2016 at 19:13

      Don’t mock the poor grapes, young lady! But, yes, Giselle is sorta funny looking, I must admit. *laughs*

  15. 132 alicjajohnson January 12, 2016 at 14:16

    I just learnt more than I have in any biology class ever.

    • 133 Professor VJ Duke January 12, 2016 at 19:13

      *proud face* Then this professor is doing his job. See, that’s the thing. Grapes can have legs. It’s actually surprising. But don’t let it put you off them.

  16. 134 PorterGirl January 12, 2016 at 14:09

    Mind. Blown. Now I have read that, I cannot see it happening any other way. Larry in his prime is quite a fellow. Giselle is a darling, what lovely legs she has – with or without make-up.

    • 135 Professor VJ Duke January 12, 2016 at 19:12

      Yes, you know, I’m thinking it’s the best theory out there, really. Makes the most sense, see. You know, with legs like that, tho, it’s hard to find trousers that fit, see.

      • 136 PorterGirl January 12, 2016 at 19:35

        It makes perfect sense, I say. I imagine she has to do without trousers all together!

      • 137 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 13:49

        I bet you’re right. Which means, she’s dreadfully cold.

      • 138 PorterGirl January 13, 2016 at 14:28

        The poor thing. I shall knit her some socks at once.

      • 139 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 23:44

        And leggings or something.

      • 140 PorterGirl January 14, 2016 at 09:22

        Good idea!

      • 141 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2016 at 13:11

        I’m half full of them. The other half are bad ideas, tho.

      • 142 PorterGirl January 15, 2016 at 17:54

        Better than no ideas, though. Many a bad idea has turned out to be interesting.

      • 143 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2016 at 19:27

        That’s true. I love bad ideas, the suddenly sudden.

      • 144 PorterGirl January 18, 2016 at 14:25

        Yes! They are usually in plentiful supply, too.

      • 145 Professor VJ Duke January 18, 2016 at 20:06

        *laughing lots* Aren’t they tho?

      • 146 PorterGirl January 18, 2016 at 20:49

        That’s because they are such fun. Sometimes.

      • 147 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2016 at 13:57

        Sometimes they can be the worst. Goodness.

  17. 148 InfiniteZip January 12, 2016 at 14:08

    Giselle is quite unattractive wouldn’t you say? Looking rather ticked too I might add.

    • 149 Professor VJ Duke January 12, 2016 at 19:11

      *laughs* Nice job there. Well, I think some makeup might do wonders?

      • 150 InfiniteZip January 13, 2016 at 11:25

        I don’t think she’d use the blush brushes, I hear she can be ticklish….maybe eye liner if nothing else.

      • 151 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 14:09

        Eye liner…that’s ghastly stuff, I hear.

      • 152 InfiniteZip January 13, 2016 at 14:35

        Ha, I call it putting in my eyes, look sleepy if I don’t….but that’s all I wear….makeup wise….I wear clothes too. Gowns and such….and boots and mittens now.

      • 153 Professor VJ Duke January 13, 2016 at 23:46

        And beanies? It’s the season of the beanie, you know.

      • 154 InfiniteZip January 14, 2016 at 01:36

        What’s a beanie? I have beans in my soup….if they mean a hat, I have one in brown with buffalo horns on it…you wouldn’t be impressed….yours would sport muskets I think….

      • 155 Professor VJ Duke January 15, 2016 at 13:09

        Yes, the hat! See, you must get a Pats beanie. So you can celebrate when they win tomorrow.

      • 156 InfiniteZip January 15, 2016 at 14:07

        I shall wear my Buffalo horns hat proudly….hmmm….is Gronk playing? I wonder….

      • 157 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2016 at 19:22

        He did! Wasn’t it awesome?

      • 158 InfiniteZip January 17, 2016 at 19:26

        They are cheaters…..time and karma will fix them…dastardly…and I grew weary of looking at Gronks panties too so there!

      • 159 Professor VJ Duke January 17, 2016 at 19:34

        What?! His panties?! You lie, the sudden! *holds ears* Nah, that’s all hype, I say.

      • 160 InfiniteZip January 17, 2016 at 19:48

        Even my hubs laughed when I pointed it out like five times….scary I say, scary!

      • 161 Professor VJ Duke January 18, 2016 at 20:02

        They won…did you see? Haha!

      • 162 InfiniteZip January 18, 2016 at 21:25

        Grrrr, they cheated I say!

      • 163 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2016 at 13:59

        Now, now, don’t get jealous!

      • 164 InfiniteZip January 19, 2016 at 14:03

        We are honest upstanding Buffalonians who take our play seriously but never enough to cheat…just saying…🏈😎

      • 165 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2016 at 14:03

        Oh, but your team can’t be taken seriously as long as Rex is the chap in charge.

      • 166 InfiniteZip January 19, 2016 at 14:07

        Don’t forget, we have the brother now too…..like Batman and Robin…or cherry cookies and milk…peanut butter and chocolate….we will overcome and rise to claim our proper trophy…..someday…..

      • 167 Professor VJ Duke January 19, 2016 at 21:27

        *laughing* I did notice this…it’s doubly worse for you!


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Thursday: OFF — Because Yes

Friday: OFF — All Day Sleep Does

Saturday: OFF — Blue-Footed Boobies Need Fed

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Punchy Argot:

1. Dadblameit.
2. Humdinger
3. Chickit
4. Chicky-woot-woot
5. Malediction
6. Rapscallion
7. Gardoobled
8. Congratulilolations
9. Togoggin
10. Gargonic
11. Two and Five Gurgles
12. Rats and a Heifer
13. Two nods, a wink, and an astroid
14. A bit, bits, and little bits
15. Huff-Hum and a Roar
16. So many thanks, I can't begin to thank you
17. Ri-do-diculous


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