Love conquers fear because love is to be more feared than fear.
V. Shnodgrate, Renowned PL Poet
“Quiet, Ruber, ya dirty cur-mark on me belly!” Salami snapped. “If we get discovered, I’ll take yer nose off with me pliers!”
“I think we should try to be quieter overall,” I mentioned, just to be nice.
“Shut-up, cur-mouth!” Salami almost hollered.
Now, here’s the thing: King Arthur’s castle is up on a hill, surrounded by a rather large village, which is surrounded by a wall. The gates to that wall are closed at night. And since it was night (almost morning, I fear) the gates were shut–tighter than a rope stretched between two stiff trees.
So, since the gates were closed–and heavily guarded, mind–we were climbing up the outside wall.
See, it was messed up enough, with holes there and holes everywhere, that we could sorta get some footholds and whatnot.
Ruber was leading the way, followed by Salami, who was followed by this professor.
Salami kept hurrying Ruber along from below, sometimes even pinching him, I think.
“Stop pinching!” Ruber yelled.
He yelled it, too. Rats and a Heifer! #Doomed
“Our cover’s been blown!” Salami shouted. “Everybody hurry!”
And quicker than wet noodles from the boiling pot, we got over the wall. Now, it turns out, the sentry on this side of the wall was dead asleep.
Which means he might’ve been dead if I didn’t think he was sleeping, see.
We passed him quietly and climbed to the ground. We were in the village. The castle was northeast of our position on an acropolis. (That’s my war talk, don’t you know.)
Now, wonders of wonders, there was no party of guards waiting for us at the bottom of the wall. We were still undiscovered.
This was goody.
About a tick or two later (probably more), we made it to the palace.
“It’s gonna be guarded strong,” Salami wheezed. (Out of shape, see.)
But it wasn’t.
The castle’s drawbridge was lowered, the doors wide opened.
We cautiously entered the castle, every sense on red alert.
Salami knew the castle well. It’s said he used to be a knight of the round table. I doubt that story, though I’ve got no reason for doubting. I just like to doubt, see.
He led us through the winding passages, long hallways, and lofty rooms.
Eventually, we entered into a room with a vaulted ceiling. There, lying on a purple cloth on a table…was the Jeweled Katana.
“Haha!” Salami laughed triumphantly. “I knew he’d have it here! Cur-Arthur.”
Then I noticed it. The sword had been reforged! It was no longer in two pieces, but whole.
I would’ve danced at that moment. But there was no music and we were on a secret spy mission, remember.
“Well, let’s get it and get out of here!” Ruber said, moving forward, his leather boots clicking on the floor.
Not clicking, but creating some sort of sound that’s rather indescribable.
Goodness. Problem. How was I going to get the katana from these two?
But I was saved.
The room lit up. Soldiers ran in.
Followed by King Arthur.
“I thought you might’ve tried this, PVJ, but not with them!”
Maybe not that saved.