NAME: Daddy Salami.

RESIDENCE: In a badly dilapidated hut on the edge of The Ominous Forest in England.

PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION: Salami is short and portly. He possesses a red moustache in the highest degree. His green eyes usually look quite feral.

ABOUT: He is a bit of an enigma to the people of the land. They find him creepy, eerie, scary, weird, disturbing, disconcerting, unsettling, and alarming—all at once.

Salami is a great friend of the Punchies and is usually seen in the Punchy Cave. He has tried to lead the Punchies in the past—much to Kirk’s annoyance.
Salami is extremely protective of his sons.

GREATEST FRIEND(S): His sons: Ruber Salami and Lucini Pavarinni.

GREATEST FOE: It could be anyone at anytime at anyplace.

DESCRIPTION IN THREE WORDS: Dangerous, spine-chilling (that counts for one word!), and unreadable.

QUOTES: Get in here, ya cur! What’s wrong with ya, ya turtle? Don’t hurt me sons, or I’ll kill ya, ya dummy!


21 Responses to “Daddy Salami”

  1. 1 laugraeva April 1, 2014 at 17:25

    “Get in here, ya cur!” has a weird affect on me (it’s that voice crush again. What the heck is wrong with me?)

    • 2 Professor VJ Duke April 1, 2014 at 18:42

      No, I love it too! Nothing’s wrong with you. It must be your Punchy side, don’t you think? Would you listen to DS, do you think?

      • 3 laugraeva April 1, 2014 at 18:52

        Ha, I don’t think I could possibly divulge/describe the affect of it!

      • 4 Professor VJ Duke April 1, 2014 at 18:53

        Have you tried his laugh yet? (He’ll be in this week’s skit!)

      • 5 laugraeva April 1, 2014 at 18:56

        Was it in last week’s?

      • 6 Professor VJ Duke April 1, 2014 at 19:03

        Yes, it was. He was playing Daddy Olmes, an inspector.

      • 7 laugraeva April 1, 2014 at 19:07


        *= re-watch

      • 8 Professor VJ Duke April 2, 2014 at 12:21

        And riot’s are great.

  2. 9 daniellajoe August 13, 2013 at 23:24

    Question (I hope I don’t hurt his feelings) is Daddy Salami sweeter now that he has a family???

    • 10 Professor VJ Duke August 13, 2013 at 23:56

      Oh, don’t worry about that. Salami can take it. Is this a question for the interview?

      • 11 daniellajoe August 14, 2013 at 01:10

        Yes!! I’m itching to know ….

      • 12 Professor VJ Duke August 14, 2013 at 02:19

        Okay then! Added to the list!

  3. 13 ladycheetah7 August 12, 2013 at 20:07

    Q2. Have you considered starting a new Punchie Crew?
    Q3. What makes you think you are qualified to lead the Punchies?

  4. 14 ladycheetah7 August 12, 2013 at 18:07

    What does the inside of Daddy Salami’s cave look like?

    • 15 Professor VJ Duke August 12, 2013 at 21:49

      Great! Thanks for sharing! Vid soon.

  5. 16 FictionFan July 11, 2013 at 18:36

    Is Daddy Salami in any way related to….Bob??

    • 17 Professor VJ Duke July 11, 2013 at 18:47

      I thought you might say that! But, no, they aren’t related. Bob actually lives with Dr. Zauberer.

      • 18 FictionFan July 11, 2013 at 18:50

        Och, ah’m reet glad! The thocht o’ wee Bobby with a muckle rid moustache was daein’ ma heid in!

        (OK! I promise I’ll stop now!)

      • 19 Professor VJ Duke July 11, 2013 at 18:57

        I quite enjoy it–though, I do have to translate it.

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Depends on the day, see.

Punchy Argot:

1. Dadblameit.
2. Humdinger
3. Chickit
4. Chicky-woot-woot
5. Malediction
6. Rapscallion
7. Gardoobled
8. Congratulilolations
9. Togoggin
10. Gargonic
11. Two and Five Gurgles
12. Rats and a Heifer
13. Two nods, a wink, and an astroid
14. A bit, bits, and little bits
15. Huff-Hum and a Roar
16. So many thanks, I can't begin to thank you
17. Ri-do-diculous


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