Important Things

So, yes, it’s Christmas this week.

Like in two days.

Maybe it was nine. I really can’t recall. (Don’t laugh. When you get my age, this sort of thing starts to happen. That’s what I’ve been told, though. How age affects the mind is still a mystery. But it does.)

Now, here’s the thing:

I’ve decided to announce a few things of importance.

First off, the Patriots won the AFC East. Again.

Steelers deflate balls, too.

Second, it’s the season of the Krampus.

This excites me lots and lots.

They say the best way to get the Krampus to pay a visit is to insult his brother, Santa Claus.

This doesn’t work.

I’ve tried.

Thirdly, and lastly…

…well, I did have something, but I forget what it was.

I’m old, remember.

Oh I remember!

Merry Christmas, everyone! Make sure to eat a few cookies for me.

Each.

The Krampus vs. Santa Claus

Okay, so here it is:

The professor is somewhat obsessed with the Krampus.

Why, you may ask?

Because I fear he might be coming.

See, for those of you who are unfamiliar with the Krampus, it’s a beast that punishes bad children at Christmas time.

Santa Claus gives presents to the good children, but the Krampus beats them (with logs, I think) or carries them away to that fiery place.

Now, this is the Krampus and Santa Claus in one pic. It took me forever to find SC. He’s in the back with a funny hat on.

Hard to see, but here’s the Krampus leading away a bunch of children.

Not very scary. Why, I’d fetch that brute right out. But the Krampus is scarier in other pictures, I must admit.

Krampus likes snow thingies.

Krampus needs a dentist.

Now, we must get back to what this professor was saying above. I said I feared this chap was on his way.

And it’s true.

See, we’re all naughty, I think, so that means the Krampus is coming. I’m giving you a heads-up to prepare.

Sharpen your swords and get ready.

One last thing.

If Santa…

…was to square off against the Krampus, I’m betting on Santa. Who do you suppose would win the fight?

Also, if you’re interested…