Important Things

So, yes, it’s Christmas this week.

Like in two days.

Maybe it was nine. I really can’t recall. (Don’t laugh. When you get my age, this sort of thing starts to happen. That’s what I’ve been told, though. How age affects the mind is still a mystery. But it does.)

Now, here’s the thing:

I’ve decided to announce a few things of importance.

First off, the Patriots won the AFC East. Again.

Steelers deflate balls, too.

Second, it’s the season of the Krampus.

This excites me lots and lots.

They say the best way to get the Krampus to pay a visit is to insult his brother, Santa Claus.

This doesn’t work.

I’ve tried.

Thirdly, and lastly…

…well, I did have something, but I forget what it was.

I’m old, remember.

Oh I remember!

Merry Christmas, everyone! Make sure to eat a few cookies for me.

Each.

Donald Trump, the Patriots, and Happy 2016

And now the professor will have speaks.

First off, happy new year everyone!

It’s 2016, which doesn’t look at all impressive, you must admit.

See–and I’m sure you agree–2014 looked more impressive.

Don’t you think so?

Yes.

I’m not sure why either. But there it is.

And now this professor has a prediction to make.

Prediction: By 2116, I will own a hoverboard.

Now how neatio is that?

I hope to get the red model, though.

So, what else should we have speaks about?

Oh yes!

Star Wars: The Force Awakens.

It’s made around $1.5 billion so far. Some say it will be the highest grossing movie of all time, moving ahead of both Avatar (2009) and Titanic (1997). (They are #1 & #2 on the list as of now, see.)

If that happened, it would be an interest. But only for a time and a bit of a time.

This professor hasn’t seen Avatar, Titanic, or Star Wars, can you believe.

But I have seen Lone Survivor (2013), starring Mark Wahlberg, which is pretty awesome.

Should we have speaks about the Patriots? Nah, I can’t stand it, I tell you.

Losing their last two games! I can’t stand it, I say! *rampages for about two months*

However, it’s also quite interesting that Mr. Donald Trump predicted that the New England Patriots would win Super Bowl 50.

Not that anyone cares.

After all, what does Donald Trump know about football? And in particular, the Pats?

At first glance, one might say nothing, like this professor did.

But, consider the following facts: Donald Trump is Tom Brady’s friend, who is Bill Belichick’s friend, who is Clint Eastwood’s friend, who made the film American Sniper (2014), which tells the story about Chris Kyle, who was good friends with Marcus Luttrell, who was portrayed in the film Lone Survivor (2013) by Mark Wahlberg, who is a huge Patriots fan.

Go Patriots.